Chapter Four: Initiation 

There was no circulation in the room at all, and the moment she opened the door 
the heat hit Carly like a wall. Stale, thick air. She realized she'd closed the 
window the night before during a flash rainstorm and had neglected to open it 
again, not expecting the heat wave of that day. Now the heat in the room lay in 
wait for her and she had stumbled against it blindly. 

“I should open…” she started, but was cut off by Nikolas pulling her into a 
kiss. She felt like she was caught on a hook, dropping his hand in surprise. 
Nikolas brought both his hands up into her hair and gently threaded his fingers 
through her curls. 

The kiss broke and Carly peered up at him, noting the thin beads of sweat 
already forming along his hairline. God, the room was stifling. She took a step 
back from him, giving him a coy smile and she moved away, towards the window. 
Nikolas watched her, his eyes moving without any censor, from her eyes, down her 
body, watching the way the silken material hugged her form, the way it fell away 
from her body in places… She was breathtaking. Carly, enjoying the heat of his 
stare, felt the blood rushing through her veins as she leaned back against the 
window. 

Now, this was going to be tricky. She reached her hands behind her and gripped 
the hooks that allowed the window to release and then stood up, sliding the 
window up until it locked behind her. It was effortless, the God's obviously 
smiling on her. She arched her back as the fresh air rushed into the room, then 
looked back at Nikolas, who's expression was quickly degenerating into that same 
disoriented confusion he'd been struggling with in the living room. She was 
beginning to understand that it meant she was really getting to him. She 
beckoned him to come towards her. Nikolas dropped his jacket on the end of the 
bed and walked, slowly across the room. 

It felt like, with every step he took towards her, the room extended in front of 
him. His vision narrowed, intently focused on her as he made his way through the 
heavy, soup-like air. Carly leaned back, sitting on the edge of the windowsill, 
and, as he approached, she reached out and slipped her fingers through the belt 
loops on his dress pants, and pulled him towards her. 

His shirt was already open, and Carly gave him a playful smile before she began 
to lay soft, moist kisses along his abdomen. Nikolas felt the floor fall out 
from under him, and seriously doubted his ability to remain upright as she 
continued her tender assault, her arms winding around his waist and closing the 
minimal distance between them. 

Nikolas tried to breathe, but the air didn't feel real. It was like being under 
water, but never drowning. The quality of the air moving in and out of his lungs 
was so thick with moisture that it felt liquid, like he could see it hanging in 
the air in front of him. The light breeze coming in through the window, blowing 
against Carly's back, seemed to make no difference to the temperature of the 
room. He thought he was going to lose his mind right there and then. 

In desperation, Nikolas slid his arms, previously hanging limp at his side, 
under Carly's and lifted her to her feet, bringing her mouth to his and into a 
passionate kiss. Kissing was familiar, safe, already explored territory. He 
didn't feel as helpless here. However, it was impossible to shake off the effect 
she'd already had. He was perspiring fiercely, the beads of sweat rolling down 
his face, stinging his eyes. He squeezed them shut, afraid to break the kiss, 
not wanting to step back into that place Carly had been pulling him into, and at 
the same time knowing he couldn't resist it. He both feared and desired it. And 
the desire held a much stronger tug. 

Carly felt like she had to pull Nikolas through almost every moment they were 
sharing. No… Pull wasn't the right word. But lead, certainly. She had led him to 
the room, and now, she noticed, his hands were not straying from their place on 
her hips. She reached down and covered them with hers and led them up her body, 
sliding them over her waist and up to her breasts. Nikolas broke the kiss 
suddenly, then looked down at her. Carly could tell he was waiting until she 
gave him clear and undeniable permission to do anything. She raised his right 
hand up to her mouth and kissed the palm softly, then slipped his thumb into her 
mouth, sucking on it gently. For a moment, she thought Nikolas' eyes might roll 
back in his head, but instead he loosened himself from her grip and pulled her 
into another, impossibly deep kiss, his hand sinking into her hair. He pulled 
back and she looked up at him, that same look she'd given him in the living 
room… So intense, so vulnerable… He had no questions whatsoever as to what he 
was doing here. At this exact moment he felt like he'd do anything, go anywhere 
she wanted him to. His heart was thundering, his whole body felt like there was 
an electric current running through it. He felt like he'd missed, somehow, a 
whole side to life no one had ever given him a clue existed. 

Carly's hands dropped Nikolas and slipped on to his shoulders. He felt her push 
at his shirt and dropped his hands to his sides as she pulled the shirt off of 
him. He felt her breath on him, but didn't move, uncertain what to do next. 
Carly let the shirt drop to the floor and looked up at him. 

“Do you want me,” she asked, her voice unreadable. Nikolas had to take several 
deep breaths before he could make himself form the word. 

“Yes,” He choked out finally. Carly smiled at him and took his hands again. She 
brought them up to her shoulders, and after a frighteningly long moment, Nikolas 
realized that the dress was tied at her neck. He slid his hand around the back 
of her neck and pulled slowly on the string, releasing the knot. The dress 
slackened around Carly and Nikolas closed his eyes, allowing his hands to move 
over her shoulders, and under her arms, pulling the material with them. The 
dress fell, quickly, to the floor, and Nikolas caught his breath. 

Oh, God, he thought suddenly. How did I get here? 

He didn't give the question much contemplation as he felt Carly leading him to 
the bed. She kissed him and this time he let his hands wander up and down her 
body as she explored his mouth with her tongue. He moved with her, not stopping 
to think anymore, or question. He didn't care. It didn't matter. He couldn't 
conceive of anything else in the world that had ever mattered outside of the 
moment. 

Carly sunk into the pillows on her bed, feeling Nikolas' weight come down on top 
of her. She closed the kiss and Nikolas pulled back slightly to look at her. She 
expected it just to be a quick cursory glance at her eyes, before he moved to 
take in more arousing parts of her anatomy. He didn't look away, however. 
Instead he stared, his eyes boring into hers to the point that she felt her 
mouth go dry. 

“You're beautiful,” he whispered. 

Carly let the words wash over her, as she gazed up at him, and took in the 
haunted and awed look in his eyes. He brought his hand up to her face and gently 
stroked her cheek. He means it, she realized. He's looking at me, really 
honestly looking at me and he means this… 

She closed her eyes, scared to look any further. She felt his hand slide from 
her face down the rest of her frame, as if trying to memorize every curve. She 
slid her arms around him, pulling him against her. 

“Everything will be different in the morning,” she whispered, so quietly, 
Nikolas didn't even hear. 

~*~*~ 

Carly arched her head back, her eyes closed, and took a long pull of air into 
her lungs. She exhaled carefully, opening her eyes to the ceiling of her room. 
She could feel Nikolas' breath against her neck as he moved away from her. She 
let her eyes close again, savoring the closeness of the moment, that last moment 
of intimacy before he made his inevitable exit. 

She waited several moments, but nothing happened. 

She looked over at Nikolas warily. He was lying beside her, on his side, his 
eyes closed, breathing deepening. She felt a momentary flash of panic. No… Wait, 
no. What had she done? How the hell had she gotten herself into this? Playing 
sexual surrogate for Robin Scorpio once again. She wasn't going to get sucked 
into this game again, no way. Nikolas, however, was still lying close to her, 
his arms still around her. She felt him begin to try to pull her towards him, to 
lay her head against his chest, but she ignored the invitation, rolling over 
stubbornly, putting her back to him. 

Nikolas, if he read the sign, chose to ignore it, and she felt him slide closer, 
his arm close around her waist, and his lips lightly graze the back of her neck. 
Carly's heart raced with fear. What was he doing? 

Deep breaths, she told herself. Don't read anything into it. You know how this 
goes. Maybe he wants to hold you now, but he's also drunk, confused and he just 
made lo… Had sex. He's just had sex for the first time. Don't assume anything. 

Having sufficiently warned herself against developing any emotional attachments, 
Carly let her eyes close. It did feel good… Safe, even, to be there, in his 
arms. She might as well enjoy it, as temporary as it may be. 

~*~*~ 

The curtains, gauzy white curtains, billowed in the breeze and cast light 
shadows on the ceiling as it moved. Carly was not aware of waking, just slowly 
became conscious of seeing this in front of her, the two sheets of white cloth 
tangling and untangling, fighting back and forth, then falling out of sight as 
the wind faded. 

She blinked. 

There was an arm, a heavy, very masculine arm, wrapped possessively around her 
waist. She let her eyes close a moment, taking in how she was feeling. Tired. 
More tired than she could ever remember being in her whole life. It had to be 
early morning, she could tell by the quality of the light beaming in through the 
window. Morning. He'd stayed. The whole night, here, with his arms around her. 
She opened her eyes and turned her head slowly to look at him. 

He was still asleep, covered by the light cotton sheet, all other bedclothes 
having been thrown to the ground. It was too hot for them. His head was bowed, 
his forehead pressed against her hair. He looked… Serene. Was that possible? 
Content. Comfortable. She wondered if he just hadn't waken again… Was he going 
to be embarrassed to find where he'd spent the night? How quick an exit was he 
going to make? She shouldn't have let him fall asleep. She'd known, right then, 
there was no way she should have ever allowed him to fall asleep if she hadn't 
wanted to risk the awkwardness of the morning after. Her mind floated, briefly, 
to just the most intangible edge of fantasy, thinking of what would happen if he 
woke and wasn't horrified to find out what had happened. She closed her eyes 
again quickly against any forming image. No. No, she wasn't going to think about 
that. This was what it was. The rebound romance, classic need/want situation. A 
one night stand if she'd ever seen one. He was a rich kid, he was young… He'd 
been a virgin, for God's sake. No, there was no way on earth he was ever going 
to look in her direction again. 

Carly felt her throat tighten, and turns her head away from him. She wasn't 
going to think about this. She just wasn't. She'd made a few bad decisions, but 
that was her life… another day, another mistake. Oh well. This one was minor, 
she'd survive it. In the meantime… She felt the weight of her fatigue sink her 
down into the mattress. She slide her hand over Nikolas' arm, and threaded her 
fingers through his, letting it rest on her hip. She closed her eyes, and willed 
herself back to sleep. With any luck, he'd be gone by the time she opened her 
eyes again. 

Carly started at the sharp rap on her front door. She sat bolt upright, 
recognizing the all-too-familiar sound. 

“Oh, God.” 

Beside her, Nikolas stirred, having been summoned unceremoniously, to 
wakefulness. He looked up at Carly, who was looking at the bedroom door, the 
sheet clasped against her chest, and barely had time to put the pieces together 
in his clouded mind before she was up and pulling on a T-shirt that had been 
flung over a chair, with amazing speed. 

“What's going on?” Nikolas' voice sounded like he hadn't spoken in a hundred 
years, and the quality of it surprised him. Carly threw him a look over her 
shoulder. 

“Not a word,” she whispered, pulling on a pair of cut off Jean shorts over her 
legs. She glanced in the mirror and grabbed a scrunchy off the dresser as the 
knock came again. Nikolas turned at the sound, ingesting it for the first time. 

“Carly!” a voice called out. A familiar voice. A voice he'd heard call his own 
name many times. The pieces collided into a very clear picture. 

“Bobbie”. 

“You are smart,” Carly muttered, twisting her hair into a high ponytail. She 
turned back to him. “This is your rep here, sport. Don't worry, I'll protect 
you… just don't make a SOUND, ok?” 

Before Nikolas could respond, Carly was out of the bedroom, slamming the door 
behind her. Nikolas shook his head, trying to clear the cobwebs, and the room 
jostled around him. He put a hand to his forehead. Welcome Nikolas Cassadine, he 
thought to himself, to the world of the hangover. 

~*~*~ 

Carly moved like lightening to the front door of the apartment just as her 
mother knocked again. 

“Carly, are you IN there?” Bobbie called out just as Carly reached the door, 
expertly undid the locks and threw it open. 

“What do you WANT?” she scowled at her mother. Bobbie raised her eyebrows. 

“To make sure you'd made it home in one piece, for starters.” 

Carly sighed, and turned away from the door, walking back into the apartment. 
Her eyes immediately fell on Nikolas half-consumed beer, still on the coffee 
table. She picked it up, her back to Bobbie, and searched the apartment for 
other signs of her paramour's presence. 

“I'm fine,” she mumbled, not wanting to look Bobbie in the eye. She moved to the 
kitchen without turning around, the bottle pressed against her stomach. “I just 
left the wedding a little early, if you didn't notice”. 

Bobbie followed Carly into the apartment, and glanced around, trying to find a 
clue of what had happened here the night before. It looked almost exactly how it 
always did… unkempt, cluttered… She wasn't going to mention it today. She turned 
her attention back to her daughter in time to see Carly pouring the remains of 
the beer down the sink. She pressed her lips together. This was to be expected. 
Considering the nightmare notions she'd been entertaining of what could have 
happened yesterday, she was rather relieved to find Carly safe at home in one 
piece with a mild hangover. 

“I noticed you left,” Bobbie said, carefully. On mornings like this Carly had to 
be approached with caution. “You were gone before they threw the bouquet.” 

Carly snorted and put the bottle down on the edge of the sink. 

“Oh, yeah? Who caught it… Brenda? She must be about due for another wedding.” 

Bobbie smiled to herself and walked over to the coffee table where she began to 
straighten the magazines. 

“Actually,” she said, with a lilt to her voice, “Lizzie caught the bouquet.” 

Carly looked up at her mother. 

“Lizzie? God, Lucky must have had a heart attack.” 

“No,” Bobbie laughed, “Lucky was cool as a cucumber. Luke, however, nearly 
choked on his cigar.” 

Hangover or no, Carly couldn't help but laugh outright at that. 

“Damn, I always miss the good stuff.” 

“Well, I don't know if it would have evened out for you… it had to be a rough 
night.” 

Carly shrugged, occupying herself with scrapping a bit of dried egg yoke off the 
counter with her thumbnail. 

“I survived,” she sighed. “I'm thinking of getting that put on a T-shirt.” 

Carly spotted Bobbie making her way towards her out of the corner of her eye, 
and quickly moved back into the living room, avoiding any sort of maternal 
gesture Bobbie might have been entertaining. 

“Well,” she said, waving her hand through the air dismissively. “You can see I'm 
ok, was there anything else?” 

Bobbie watched Carly's affected and nervous manner, and narrowed her eyes, her 
mother's intuition going off like a well-honed alarm system. She glanced around 
the room again, and decided whatever it was, it couldn't be life threatening. 
She turned back to Carly's expectant face. 

“Breakfast.” 

Carly rolled her eyes dramatically. 

“Bobbie…” 

“I'm making the whole thing, and you're coming to eat with us. You have to get 
something in you. You'll feel better.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” 

“And besides,” Bobbie smiled. “Lucas has been driving me insane about some video 
game or something… it's your turn to listen.” 

Carly flopped down on the couch. She couldn't fight this, no way. Her mother had 
probably been planning on springing a family breakfast on her for weeks, and 
there was no way to avoid it without gaining unwanted attention. 

“I wanna shower and change… give me half an hour, ok?” 

~*~*~

Lying on his back, Nikolas could hear the sounds of Carly and Bobbie's 
conversation in muffled tones in the living room. He could make out an 
occasional word or phrase, all Carly's, Bobbie's voice not carrying with any 
clarity. 

Looking around the room, still adjusting to what he'd waken to. Carly's bedroom… 
Carly's bed. The air was clearer now, not nearly as stifling as it had felt the 
night before. His head, however, felt just as cloudy as it started to retrace 
the evening’s event. He realized he was in a state of undress, and decided that 
perhaps rectifying that might assist him in thinking a little more clearly. 

Nikolas slowly, gingerly, began to pull his clothes back on, careful not to make 
any sudden moves. He remembered wondering last night if he'd been truly drunk, 
and now, he decided, he didn't much care to find out. Clearly he had a limit and 
he'd passed it. But maybe this wasn't such a harsh price to pay. 

Having located all the remains of his tuxedo, and donning all the ones that 
didn't make him look ridiculous at this time of morning, Nikolas sank into the 
chair by the dresser to think. 

That, he could remember clearly, had been… Incredible. He couldn't shake that 
feeling. That, whatever it was, whatever judgment people would have made about 
it, he'd never felt that way before. Maybe it was just a need for someone, maybe 
it was just reaching out for some sort of comfort, but it felt, undeniably, like 
more. 

He shook his head. Oh. Mistake. The level of nausea he was feeling suddenly made 
itself clear. In fact, all the symptoms of the hangover were making themselves 
more felt. It really wasn't all that bad however, he though, leaning back in the 
chair. Just a mild headache, a feeling of unsteadiness, and a tight fisted knot 
in his stomach. Survivable, without a doubt. 

The door opened, and Nikolas looked up at Carly hopefully. Hopeful of what, he 
wasn't quite sure, but nonetheless, the feeling was there. She closed the door 
behind her and looked at him with out emotion. 

“The coast is clear, but you have to go out the window.” 

Nikolas stared at her dumbly. 

“What?” he said after a moment. 

“My mother wants to have a family breakfast, you have to go out the window, or 
she'll see you. And don't think for a moment she won't know exactly what 
happened.” 

“Uh,” Nikolas stopped. He wasn't sure what to say. He wasn't even sure what he 
expected, but somehow, this wasn't it. 

Carly, all business, strode across the room and pushed the window open even 
further. 

“It's not much of a drop, just a few feet,” she said simply. 

“You're serious,” Nikolas said, finally. Carly looked at him blankly. 

“What, do you WANT my mother to know what happened last night?” 

“No, but…”

“Well, then you either hide out here until she goes out… and she's not due at 
the hospital until Monday Afternoon… or you go out the window.” 

Nikolas' head swam. What was going on here? He rose, slowly, and looked at her, 
his face not registering anything but confusion. He opened his mouth to say 
something, then shut it again. Carly looked at him expectantly, and he moved, 
purposely, towards the window. 

“Then I guess,” he said slowly, “That I'm going out the window.” 

Carly shrugged. 

“Seems like your best bet.” 

Nikolas tired to identify the feelings now swirling around inside him. 
Confusion, definitely. Hurt… Maybe. He looked at Carly again, but she didn't 
meet his gaze. Fine, he decided. Window. I can do this. 

Nikolas lifted himself up onto the ledge, and climbed out the window with 
surprising ease. He dropped to the ground, and stopped, examining his 
surroundings. He was in Bobbie's backyard, specifically, the garden. New flowers 
bloomed on bushes around him and a stone pathway led to the corner of the house, 
where it merged with a concrete walk between the brownstone and it's neighbor. 
His path clear, Nikolas started across the garden, then stopped and looked back 
at Carly, an odd, disoriented, expression on his face. Carly leaned out of the 
window, and hissed at him, clearly anxious. 

“Go!” 

Nikolas shook his head. This wasn't how he wanted to leave things. She was 
acting completely different from last night, and he wasn't sure if he'd just 
imagine, under the influence of the champagne, the look he'd seen in her eyes. 
He turned and marched back to the window. Carly drew back slightly, as if she 
was suddenly afraid of him. “What are you doing?” 

Without a word, Nikolas reached up, slid his hand around her neck, and kissed 
her. Carly felt herself go limp and barely noticed when Nikolas' hands moved to 
grab her waist until she felt him pull her out of the window, never breaking the 
kiss. Carly responded passionately, as she slipped out of the window, held 
firmly in his grasp. Nikolas' stance was solid, and he didn't stumble as she 
swung down, landing on the ground. Instead he just gripped her waist with his 
hands tighter and around her a little tighter, and lifts her as her arms twine 
around his neck. Carly, deeply immersed in the gentle way he was exploring her, 
found herself wrapping her legs around his waist, and pressing herself closer to 
him, forgetting her surroundings entirely. 

The kiss broke, and Carly looked at Nikolas in amazement, her eyes locked on his 
as she slid, slowly, down his body and found the ground again. She stared at 
him, without any words, for a long moment, her arms pressed on either side of 
his neck, his hands still gripping her waist. It took several moments for Carly 
to shake herself out of the trance and remember where she was and what she was 
supposed to be doing. She broke the gaze, and Nikolas' grip on her loosened, as 
he stepped away from her. 

“I should be going,” he said, quietly. Carly nodded, mutely. Nikolas examined 
her a moment, then turned and started out of the garden. Carly, hearing him 
retreat, looked up suddenly and called after him. 

“Nikolas!” 

Nikolas stopped and turned back to look at her. Carly took a deep breath, then 
gave him her very best one hundred-watt smile. Nikolas looked momentarily 
confused then smiled back at her slowly. Carly's heart suddenly leapt up into 
her throat. She realized she was now officially in trouble. 

“I'll see you around,” she managed, still smiling. Nikolas nodded, then turned, 
and left the back yard, heading around to the street. Carly stared after him, 
listening to the retreating sound of his footsteps before they faded and were 
drowned out by a neighbor's sprinkler and the sound of cooing morning doves. 
Carly gave her head a shake, and looked around at her surroundings… standing in 
the middle of her mother's garden, still looking like she'd just rolled out of 
bed, and facing a five foot climb to get back in her window. 

Stranded. 

She smiled to herself. “What am I doing?” she asked herself for the hundredth 
time, before walking around the side of the house to attempt to sneak back into 
her own apartment.