Cameron, upon leaving the hospital, spent with emotion, knew he had to get to the hill. That always made him feel at one with all the people he loved.

Stopping by his apartment he dressed for a run, needing to clear his head of all this sadness, knowing it wouldn't help this time, but just the same he needed to run. Seeing his answering machine blinking he couldn't face who might be calling he would pick up the messages later. Closing the door he took off for the park and the hill.

What seemed like hours he finally made it to the one place he felt close to God, Amanda and now baby Gary. Falling to his knees he began to weep uncontrollably, sobbing like his heart was tearing out of him. 'Why God? Why? Did he really deserve all of this? Josie and I are the ones you should be taking; we're the guilty ones. Not the baby, he never asked to be in all this mess. Please bring him back take me instead. I am no good; I only hurt everything I touch please, PLEASE. Screaming at the stars, moon and at God. Falling forward pounding his head on the ground, Cameron continued to scream in wretched pain, hoping that only time would ease some of this.

Over and over repeating 'please not the baby'. Until he finally was able to push himself up to the bench and with his head in his hands cried quietly for all the things he had lost. His son, the only woman he ever loved or would love and his brother who would never forgive anything he did in his life.

'I have to leave, get away from those who will never forgive me.' Wiping the tears from his face he got up to leave when out of the corner of his eye he caught movement, 'Oh, God who is there? Am I never to be free?' looking up at the heavens.

Walking out from the tree that had been blocking her Amanda sheepishly said, 'It's just me, Cameron.'

'How much have you heard, don't answer that I can see by your face you've been here awhile, oh God.'

'I am so sorry, I should have been there, Why didn't you return my calls? I have left several messages, I don't want you to go through this alone, and I am the only one you can count on. The only one you can talk to, I knew I had to put my petty feelings aside and be there for the man I loved and do love. Oh, honey', walking up and putting her arms around him as he began to sob again.

'I truly don't deserve your love, Amanda, why? After all I have done and probably will do in the future; do you not run from me? I need you so much but I couldn't stand to lose you again, I have lost so much.' Weeping against her shoulder as she continued to hug and rub his back.

'You will not lose me again, Cameron for I realized that over these few days I have missed you and our love and I can forgive you, it's over. We are soul mates and nothing anyone can do will drive us apart again. Please come home. I will take care of everything, you just hang onto me and we will get through this together.' As she kissed his tears from his face, they stood there looking at the stars, the moon and put themselves in God's hands.