Eric
Theodore Cartman
Age: 8 years
Weight: 90lbs
Fav. Sayings: Kick Ass!, Screw you hippie!
Fav. Food: Cheesy Poofs (or whatever is around)
~Cartman lives with his mom (the crack whore),
has a pet kitty and pot bellied pig (Fluffy).
Voice: Trey Parker
Episodes: Can be seen in every episode
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The fat kid
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Abducted by aliens who put an anal probe (some kind of symbiotic
metamorphosis device) in him. Claimed he was not under alien control
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Scott Baio gave him pink eye aboard the Alien ship
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Catch phrase "Screw you guys, I’m going home"
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Hates rainbows (those things that crawl up you leg and bite
the inside of your ass)
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Won the environmental essay contest (by copying Walden by
H.D. Thoreau)
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Beefed up to super fat ass for his Television debut (which
never happened)
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Dressed up as Scuzzlebutt to scare the others and was almost
killed
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Linebacker for the South Park Cows
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Dressed up as Hitler for Halloween, then as a Ku Klux Klan
member
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Was abducted and sent to Ethiopia, discovered Sally Struthers
secret stash of food
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Found the Triangle of Zinthar on an archeological dig
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Bought Ms. Ellen a chocolate pie for Valentines Day, but
forgot it at home (actually he ate it himself)
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Wishes he knew how to spell
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Had tea parties for his stuffed animals because he was upset,
he didn’t know who his Father was
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When looking for his father, he thought he was a "Naive American"
then a "Black African American"
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Can’t leave anything unfinished
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Lives in the East Side of town
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Deputized by Officer Barbrady to help solve the chicken lover
case, no one would listen to his authority. Involved in a prostitution
sting
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#325 on the Dodgeball team
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Dressed up as an old lady to hoax Uncle Jimbo as revenge
for a lie
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Took swimming lessons (doggy style), eventually made it to
the deep end
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Made no money off the movie "Me & Mr. Hankey"
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Sang the "cheesy poofs" theme song and won a regional championship,
appeared in Cheesy Poof commercial
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Became a hero during the Planetarium ordeal
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Built Ewok Village 2000 with the help of Kenny
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Said Stan’s line (Oh my God! They killed Kenny!)
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Fell off of a bull and suffered head trauma, thought he was
a Vietnamese prostitute named Ming Li
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Did his German dance to cheer Chef up and to raise money
for his legal fees