Felicia: Well?

V: Forget it you can't even see your own fingers in this light, let alone Mac's fingerprints -- or whomever.

Felicia :This is so frustrating.

V: Yeah. But not for long. I brought a field kit -- magnifying glass,  powder, flashlight. I just got to get some privacy.Then at least I'll  be able to tell if these fingerprints are a close match or a sure miss -- you know, Macwise.

Felicia: Ok. Good. Great. Let's see if we can find a room where Mac -- James, whatever you want to call him -- won't notice.

V: Yipes.

Felicia: "Yipes"?

James: Scared of the dark?

Felicia: Only what's in it.

James: Oh, it's not that bad. Gives us a chance to discuss things  --privately. Can we go someplace? It's sort of serious.

Felicia: Sounds serious. But I need to help v.

James: What, return a glass?

V: What, this?

James: Yeah, that. Why don't you just set it down? This place is crawling with help.

V: No, no. I couldn't. It's -- well, it's chipped, see? You know, set that down, someone slits their lip. You know 90% of all accidents occur in the home.

James: How conscientious of you.

V: Ok, fine, forget it. You got me. Ok, the glass is just an excuse.  I'm -- well, there's this guy in the kitchen. You know, he's really cute. Well, I'm single. You know, I'm available. I'm a little desperate. And, you know, I'm waiting for one of the two of you to jump in here before I'm totally humiliated.

James: I understand. I used to be single myself once. Good luck.

V: Thank you. I'll need it. Later:

V: Man, is it crowded in here. Times Square on New Year's Eve, Hollywood freeway at 5:30, downtown Calcutta in the middle of a --

Felicia: Yeah, it's crowded. So? Tell me.

V: So I can't find a place to check the fingerprints on the champagne glass. I mean, I'm trying not to attract attention here, but when you pull out a flashlight in the middle of a blackout, believe me, people notice. Felicia: try the stairwell.

V: Is it empty?

Felicia: too empty. I was just there with him.

V: Ooh. Really?

Felicia: Oh, look, just try the stairwell. Do you think it'll work?

V: Sure. Of course, you can forget about a full forensics workup.

Felicia: I just need to know soon.

V: right. Have you made any progress?

Felicia: Sort of. I'm engaged.

V: You're engaged? You're engaged?

Felicia: You can scream it to the top of your lungs if you want to.  He wants everybody to know about it.

V: I leave the two of you alone for two seconds, and you --

Felicia: He asked me. It was just easier to say yes. Besides, I'm going to be closer to the situation.

V: From what I hear, you certainly will. Felicia: I've got it under control.

V: Oh, what if he suggests s-e-x? And I am not referring to scrabble.

Felicia: I'm not worried about sex.

James: Glad to hear it.

Felicia: Hey. You break it, you buy it.

V: Listen, I've got a previous engagement. Hey, congratulations. I'm sure that the two of you will be very -- together.

James: Well, I hope she finds him, whoever he is.

Felicia: So do I.

Later, v. Is in the stairway

V: hello? Anybody there? No? Good.

V Is fingerprinting the glass

V: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah.

Sprays on fingerprinting powder, etc. She has a flashlight in her mouth

V: Oh, my god. (flashlight falls out of her mouth) oh -- ok.  Ok, I got to get this news to Felicia. All right.

Later:

Felicia: Oh --

V: Hey. Where is he?

Felicia: He's down in the wine cellar with the bartender trying to get some champagne. He wants to do a toast to me for everyone to hear.

V: You might want a couple of glasses yourself.

Felicia: Did you check the prints?

V: Mm-hmm.

Felicia: And do they match?

V: No.

Felicia: Oh, my god. Are you sure? Now, you were in the stairwell.  What about all the whorls and the ridges --

V: Yeah, yeah, he has -- he has a permanent scar on his index finger. I mean, forensically speaking, it's the Grand Canyon of index finger scars. According to police records, when Mac was commissioner, he didn't have any scar - not there, anyway.

Felicia: So you mean the person that I just got engaged to --

V: Is not Mac Scorpio and never has been.

Back to More Scenes