Jax: Hello, wife.

Alexis: Hello, husband.

Jax:Oh, don't let me intrude on your extramarital affair. I was just looking for someone, you know.

Chloe: Well, this is a good place to start. Is V with you?

Ned: What, she called you, too?

Chloe: Mm-hmm.

Jax: And me, which means it's a summons, which means that she's furious with all of us.

Ned: No, not necessarily. Maybe she pulled another coup for L&B and landed somebody big.

Jax: No, why would she call me? Now, obviously she figured out that Alexis and I are only married for show.

Chloe: Well, that wouldn't make her furious. A little miffed about being kept in the dark, maybe.

Jax: No, no, V's very serious about the law of the land, including, one assumes, this legal contract we call marriage. V.

V: Hey.

Jax: Hey. Whatever you're going to say, I don't blame you. We deserve it.

V: Did you tell them?

Simon: Would I do such a thing?

V: I'm not quitting because I'm mad.

Ned: Quitting what?

Ned: Your letter of resignation. Why?

Chloe: Ned, look at the situation, not the letter.

Ned: But why did you write it in a letter? Why coul't you just tell me to my face?

Alexis: V and your face are right in this room. It's professional courtesy. You know how she is.

Ned: You backstabbing jerk. What did you offer her? Jax: Excuse me? Ned: "Another opportunity has presented itself. And in the interest of my own future --" V: Ned -- Ned, it wasn't Jax, ok?

Alexis: You two really must pay attention.

Jax: him. Oh, you're going to work for Simon. You know, he's never had any visible means of support except for his family's money.

Simon: My family's money and I are taking her on a holiday. Ned: A vacation? Simon: Mm-hmm. Ned: Well, if all you wanted was a little holiday -- V: But it's more than just a little -- Simon is taking me on a cruise around the world.

Alexis: Oh. Chloe: Oh. Ned: Oh. Jax: What? Ned: A year? Jax: Yeah, it doesn't take a year to sail around the world. That defies common sense.

Simon: Well, it's not a regatta. No one's trying to set a record.

Alexis: It's the QE2, Jax. It was built to defy common sense.

Chloe: It's going to be glorious.

Ned: V -- V, I know I've been lazy. I know that I have let inertia get me in its cozy grip. But I promise if you stay I will rehearse more, I will write songs, I'll let you book me anywhere in the world.

Jax: V, why don't come back and work for me? You ever really liked working for Ned anyway.

V: Didn't I? I thought I did.

Jax: Ok, well, what if one night on the high seas, Simon decides to bet you at baccarat, huh?

V: Well, what if one night I decide to give him another concussion? That's a gamble we both have to take. But Simon thinks that unemployment and a world cruise are experiences I should have.

Jax: Yeah, of course he'd think that.

V: And then he's agreed to try working for a year.

Jax: Oh, you can't be serious. Chloe: Is the fall of the British empire at hand? Alexis: Working at what? Simon: I've always wanted to be a lifeguard. And V says she can help me get my certificate, so -- Ned: Wait. This is a joke, right? V: I think he'll make a superior lifeguard. Simon: I have this strange notion that it'll help repay a debt that I owe society. Jax: Oh, in lieu of a prison sentence? Simon: Well, I've never actually been a criminal. But I do feel that I have been a leech on the thigh of civilization, as it were, for really a rather long time. Most of my life, in fact. I've behaved badly to many people, including yourselves, including even my enchantress.

V: If I don't let him call me that, he calls me Venus. Thank you.

Ned: Let me get this straight -- you are signing up for a two-year hitch with this man?

V: Well, the terms of the hitch are still under negotiation. We'll see how the first year goes. If I'm eyeing the lifeboats after a week --

Simon: Oh. They seem to think that you've asked to be taken off a respirator.

V: Could you hold this for me? Thank you. Could I see a show of hands, please, if I tell you that this is what I really want? I remind you that I am still the same stubborn, suspicious V without an incautious bone in my body. If I tell you that I think that the man standing next to me and the life I'm describing could make me very, very happy, do you think that any of you could manage to be happy for me?

Chloe: A drug smuggler? What, did you have a different haircut or a beard or a nose ring?

V: He never did seem too likely a drug smuggler. But like the sheriff always said, I wasn't paid to think.

Alexis: I want a job like that.

Simon: Do you still have that uniform, and would you wear it for me?

Jax: Oh, Simon, give it a rest. You know, a shadow would fall across my sandwich and I would just know -- ofc. Ardanowski. You were the bane of my existence. If I would have known back then that you would possibly turn out to be one of the best friends I ever had --

Alexis: You want some more champagne?

Ned: Yeah, that's a good idea.

Chloe: Yes, please.

V: You know, I was always a little bit in love with you. Jax: You know, I often wondered if the timing had been different -- V: Uh-uh, things happen exactly as they should. We'd have driven each other crazy. Jax: Well, we did that anyway.

V: What I needed was for someone to see me, to really see me deep down through my yes-sir-no-sir manners and my all-thumbs shyness. I needed someone to see that, yeah, I was a great sheriff's deputy, but that there was more to me, more than even I knew. And you did that. You were the oversized, gorgeous jock of a big brother that I never had. And if you told me that I was as good as anyone, I knew it had to be true.

Jax: You're going to make me yell at you if you keep this up. Now, who am I going to call when I see something really great on tv? Huh? Who am I going to call when I want to have lunch when I need to hear myself think out loud? And who am I going to call when I need someone to tell me the truth when no one else will?

V: You got me the cell phone. You know my number.
Jax: Right. In the middle of the ocean while you're teaching Simon to be a lifeguard? I hope he drowns.

V: No, you don't. You hope that I make him very happy.
Jax: Who cares about him? I hope he makes you happy. And I swear, if he doesn't treat you right, you call me.

V: You know, I could question your recent romantic goings-on, if the term "romance" even applies. I don't have to understand it because I assume you know what you're doing. Can you do the same for me?
Jax: Sure.

V: Ok. Jax: You be happy. V: I am. Jax: I'm going to miss you. V: Me, too.

Ned: May I second that emotion?

V: Mm-hmm.

Alexis: Me, too?

V: Bye. I'll miss you.

Alexis: I'll miss you, too.

Chloe: And me? When you get to Milan, you come by the house. And if I'm not there, terese will open it up for you till I am.

V: Ok. Ok.

Simon: Venus? V: Yeah, we should go. Simon: Yeah. V: I'd really be a fool if they closed the restaurant down before we got around to it, right? I love you guys. I love you.

Alexis: We love you.

V: Bye.

Jax: Have fun. Bye.

V: Bye.

Alexis: Have fun.

Chloe: Bye, Simon.

Alexis: Bye.

Chloe: Bye, V.

Alexis: Bye-bye, V.

V: Bye.

Chloe: Jax, I know you still have some reservations about Simon, but I really believe --

Jax: He's all right. Not 1/10 good enough for her, but I'd have reservations about anything that --

Chloe: That takes her away. Of course you would.

Jax: Yeah.

Ned: To V. Alexis: To V. Chloe: To V. Jax: To V.

Back to More Scenes