Letter from Emma in India to Parp

May 13th, Mahabalipuram, South East India.

Hello Parp,

Cheers for remembering me in your fax. How's our page? Does it look good? Do you want to hear a classic from Ian? [Emma explains why she uses a pritt stick to stick her stamps while Ian licks away at them... Very sensible and a very funny story but perhaps not publishable on the WWW - you'll have to ask Emma about it!] Want to hear some more daft Ian stories? Well in Nairobi, Kenya, one of the scams is the shoe cleaners in the street wait for you to get near and shout "where did you get your shoes? I'm a shoe designer". If all of the guys were shoe designers what are they doing shining shoes for 4p a go? Well 2nd, they get you to stop then put a load of splurgey stuff on your boots then they say that they'll clean them for you! I mean it's pretty obvious that it's a scam when they shout to you, so our Ian, Mr Trustworthy himself, stops to talk to the guys, me and Martin are shouting "don't stop, don't do it Ian" but his cool, calm reply is "it's OK. they're shoe designers" but he wasn't cool or calm when they slopped spurgey crap on his boots! - ha ha ha ha ha ha.

So it's been fun and games for my old relic. Other news - I gave up smoking on the 22nd March and I'm 20 on the 29th May. And I'm gonna be on the beach at Goa. I'm glad to here you had a good holiday, shall I tell you about mine? Well we're having 5 days on the East Coast too, but the East Coast of India, I'm in my hammock on the veranda of our hotel surrounded by the tropical garden, overlooking the golden sand and sea. max temp 37 dC. Some days just slightly overcast. But apart from that it's quite nice! We came here to see the Shore Temple and some other old relics, So Ian felt at home. It's actually not all glam, it took us 31 hours on a train to get here. No showers, one carriage sleeps 54 people all hot, sweaty and smelly. So we have suffered.

See you in a couple of years!

Emma x.

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