"Pinocchio's Daring Journey"
This is another of my favorite attractions in the park. The entrance makes it seem like a mirthful peppy jaunt featuring a huggable wooden boy with no genitals, and it does start that way... but the mood lasts for about 3 seconds. You get in your happy little scooty-car, a door opens, and you see the smiling little woodenhead dancing with 2 ultra-sexxxy female puppets. All is perfect in the world and then...
Breaking even Snow White's impressively speedy joy-to-horror time record, the 2nd thing you see on this ride is the evil Stromboli ENSLAVING several puppets who look very sad indeed... then he enslaves YOU, the rider. I once heard a lovely story of the ride breaking down as a ridecar with a little kid in it entered the big wooden birdcage ("this is your new home!") and the
child just going berserk from terror. Haha! That's the kind of crap I find so beautiful about Disneyland. It isn't the dorks in conductor's outfits or the morons in the Winnie The Pooh suits, it's the rides where the focus is 100% on TERRIFYING kids. Snow White might be the scariest thing in the park, but Pinocchio is right behind it. After you escape the birdcage (I guess), you see Jiminey Cricket being a conscientious conscience by trying to get you, Pinocchio (I guess), to go back home instead of making the more interesting choice and going to...
Pleasure Island! Bring on the booze and whores!
Get your own Free Home PageBorn 7/16/99. Last updated 9/17/01
Oui!