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I'll try to keep this short but it will be difficult to make clear to you who read this post how my wife and I felt during our week at "Couples Resort" in Ocho Rios without going into some detail regarding our treatment by the staff at "Couples" during our stay.
Let me preface my comments with a bit of background about my wife and myself. We are both 50 years old and overweight. I am a nudist and a member of The Naturist Society and Naturist Life International, however, my wife is not a nudist. You may be asking yourself at this point, "what does this have to do with "Couples Resort?" I hope by the time I am done relating the events of our week at Couples that it's relevance will become clear.
My wife and I thought that we had done our best to research the Resort before booking the week of May 2 through May 9. We discussed what was important to us and what we expected from our choice. One of our compromises that we came up with was that my wife would be willing to spend time in a nudist environment if we could find a non-threatening environment were it wouldn't be mandatory for her to sunbathe nude.
When we read about Couples we thought we had found exactly what we were looking for. All of the resources that we were able to find indicated that it had a wonderful island for au-natural sunbathing but there seemed to be some question about whether or not it was Clothing Optional. After much searching we did stumble across at least one web page that declared that it was "clothing optional." We still weren't convinced until our travel agent gave us a brochure from the Jamaica Tourist Board which encouraged "Adventurous twosomes sail off to the resort's Tower Island, a turreted islet for clothing-optional sunbathing." He also gave us a video tape produced by Couples for distribution to travel agents. The title of the tape was:
"Couples: A SuperClubs All-Inclusive Resort"
This tape clearly referred to "Tower Island" as Clothing Optional. This settled it for us. It sounded perfect so we spent three months excitedly looking forward to our week in paradise.
We flew into Ocho Rios on Saturday, May 2 and spent the day getting acquainted with the layout of the resort and sat through orientation at which nothing was said about nudity being mandatory on "Tower Island." Sunday we sat for about an hour on the beach watching a young man in a bright yellow bathing suit clearly visible from the beach enjoying "Tower Island" with his female companion who I assume was nude but there was really no way to tell. This convinced us that we could go ahead and spend some time on the island without my wife being pressured to immediately doff her bathing suit. We spent several hours Sunday on "Tower Island" and had a wonderful time. I was nude; my wife decided to try going topless. We left the island convinced that this was going to be a great vacation.
Our next excursion to "Tower Island" was on Tuesday, May 5. My wife and I climbed into the boat that shuttled us to the island and the boatman asked "have you been to the island before?" We, of course, both replied "yes." We climbed out of the boat looking forward to another wonderful day of sun and relaxation. We sought out an out of the way location apart from the more active part of the island where my wife found a hammock and I found a lounge. She went topless, I again went nude. I walked to the bar and got a couple of drinks and we had just settled down to enjoying the sun and reading our books when the man from the boat comes up to my wife and tells her that she must be nude or we'd have to leave. I looked into my wives face and saw this look of incredulity that really touched my heart. Here she had worked up the courage to go topless and now this guy was expecting her to strip naked. I just couldn't expect her to do that under these conditions so we both agreed we'd leave rather than comply to this demand. The embarrassment of being evicted from the island in front of other guests was intolerable. The boatman informed us that "those were the rules."
Rules? Some will maintain that we have no complaint because, after all, "rules are rules." Well, if that's the case then shouldn't the "rules" apply equally to everyone?
A couple other "rules" we were told about were as follows:
1. Topless sunbathing by women was to be restricted to the end of the pier. (Compliance with this rule was nothing short of non-existent. As a matter of observation, it was far easier for the young, topless gals to get their drinks on the beach than it was for us older overweight folks. At one point we waited over an hour for our drinks only to be told that we were forgotten, which never seemed to be the case if one was young and beautiful.)
2. No cameras were to be used on "Tower Island". (I had asked if I could take a panoramic shot of the resort with my cardboard disposable camera from the top of the Tower and was told that I'd have to take it from the boat and not from the island, however, that same day as the Sunset Cruise got underway a man on the island stood in clear view of everybody with his very large 35 mm SLR and was shooting pictures of the catamaran "Cool Jazz" as it sailed by.)
3. "Tower Island" was considered the au-natural facility for the resort but I sat on the beach and watched a group of couples playing in the surf on the beach with the girls naked on their partner's shoulders.
"Double standards," you say? Well, if you don't I will, and it didn't end there.
The effect this incident had on our vacation is hard to explain. We started hearing hypocrisy and insincerity in nearly every "no problem mon," and "irie," that the staff uttered. Oh, there were some exceptions but we found many of the staff unwilling to return a smile or make eye contact. The cook at the beach grill was very unfriendly and the same goes for a certain gentleman desk clerk.
At one point I decided I'd like to play a little volleyball only to be told by the staff member overseeing the game that I couldn't because I didn't have a partner (my wife has back problems) and I'd make the sides uneven. This objection was not shared by the guests who were playing who all made me feel more than welcome to join in. However, the girl from the staff continued to insist that I find a partner. Hello! This place is called "Couples." What did she expect me to do, go up to somebody and ask "pardon me, are you here alone?"
Housekeeping was very lax. Frequently we had to call for towels and ask for our "complimentary" soap. The sheets were never changed once for the whole week that we were there and the floor in our room was never vacuumed.
We completely missed out on the sunset cruise. The first time we tried to sign up on Tuesday we were to late and were told to come back early Thursday. I went to the desk at 7:00 AM and was told to come back at 8:00AM. Of course by this time the line to sign up extended half way down the verandah. We missed out again and this was our last opportunity. Don't you think the desk clerk could have extended some courtesy and told me that this might happen so we wouldn't miss out? We felt as if he couldn't care less. We were just another nuisance part of his job.
We wondered, could the treatment we received have made us oversensitive or could it be that now we were able to see through the fog of our own naïve excitement over our dream vacation enabling us to look into the real face of Jamaica.
Our impression of "Couples" is that they prefer to cater to the young. Us old folks aren't welcome at this resort "mon."
This treatment cast a shadow over our whole vacation and we say to Couples, "Bad form. That's no way to treat a guest."
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I did send photo copies of this and several different sources including one from the Jamaican Tourist Board that clearly stated that "Couples" Tower Island was clothing optional to the resort and to Apple Vacations. All of which have produced nothing but polite apologies.
Yours Truly
Greg Prust
Here is a letter a sent to Mr. Carl Kortum, General Manager of the Swissôtel Chicago regarding a recent stay
Dear Mr. Kortum,
This past March 31, I stayed at your establishment, the Swissôtel Chicago, for a period of one night. Unfortunately, this was a stay that I would rather forget.
From the time I checked in until the time I left, I was made to feel extremely unwelcome. Let me spend a few moments to highlight some of the more unfortunate portions of my stay:
- My two calls for turndown service were ignored
- My bathroom was without a bar of soap. While
I called housekeeping to rectify the situation (at the same times
I called for turndown service), these calls, too, were ignored.
- When I received my morning room service, the tray was missing the milk I had ordered. The attendant promised to return with milk, but never did.
This alone would not generally cause me to write a letter of complaint. And I wouldn't have, had it not been for the outright rude and inconsiderate service I received upon checking in to your establishment.
I was staying at your hotel for a corporate conference and was surrounded by numerous colleagues when I checked in. I handed my credit card - a Diners Club card - to the check-in clerk. She ran the card through the computer, which gave her a referral code. She immediately said in a very loud and rude voice, "Your card does not seem to work. Give me another credit card." I was appalled by her rudeness and instructed her to call up my credit card company for authorization. She then proceeded to use her speakerphone to call up the authorization line for American Express. I had to instruct her at that point that she was calling the wrong company for authorization. I was now extremely appalled, especially as many of my colleagues were quite aware of what was occurring. I was being treated like a deadbeat in full view of my colleagues, and, hence, I was mortified. She finally called the correct company and my card was approved. By this time, though, the damage was done. The clerk had managed to turn a simple security check into an embarrassing affair for me.
I travel frequently (50+ nights/year) for both business and pleasure, and I frequently stay at the finest hotels in the world. I also write and assign travel articles for a magazine I publish. Thankfully for you, this trip was not for such an article. This was my first stay at any Swissôtel, and, at this point, it may very well be my last.
By writing this letter, I can only hope that future guests will not be subjected to such rude and inconsiderate treatment. Thank you for you attention to this matter.
I received an apologetic phone call as soon as this letter was received, but that is all I received. Next time I'm in Chicago, I'll stay at The Drake.
Frank Lazard
It's your move. Send us some e-mail.
