My Navel
BEHOLD!
navel \'na-vil\ n : a depression in the middle of the abdomen that marks the attachment of fetus and mother
Merriam and Webster may limit the navel to such a small definition, but I have found that the navel is much, much more than anyone could ever appreciate. Not many people have the true respect for what I consider the best part of the human anatomy. Because of this, I have set up this page as a personal tribute to my navel. My navel and I have been through a lot together. I seems that the memories are endless. A long time ago, or maybe yesterday, I decided that the navel has MANY uses.
1) Pen or pencil holder : anything that you can not find a place for when writing??? Just stick it in your navel! *WARNING!!! Harm can result from sticking things too far in.... Kids, don't try this at home*
2) Torture Point : I have found that many people are not entirely happy to be poked directly into their belly button. To try this, extend only your index finger and poke with force directly into the victim's navel. While I promise the navel will remain intact, your victim's ego may not. Always be ready for the counter-poke, as it is likely to be attempted often. For added ease, find people with navel rings and studs, as they are like targets and make the navel much easily to locate and poke.
3) Lint Storage : The navel has become the best place for lint storage and always will be. Many will reach to their jean pockets, or the cushions of their couch for lint. But if you want quality personalized lint that you CAN'T buy at a store, just refer to the unappreciated navel.
I have only put 3 of the most common uses for the navel on this page, but please feel free to make up your own! The possibilities are truly endless. Please take a moment and reflect. Love your navel. Pet your navel. Show it you really care. Start Today!!! You will be glad you did.
*NOTE: my navel will be accepting fan mail at the following address (click to mail) Tim's NAVEL!!!