I Used to Fear Old Age



OLD AGE 2001

I have always dreaded old age. I cannot imagine anything worse than being old. How awful it must be to have nothing to do all day long but stare at the walls or watch TV. So last week, when the mayor suggested we all celebrate Senior Citizen Week by cheering up a senior citizen, I determined to do just that. I would call on my new neighbor, an elderly retired gentleman, recently widowed, who, I presumed, had moved in with his married daughter because he was too old to take care of himself. I baked a batch of brownies and without bothering to call (some old people cannot hear the phone), I went off to brighten this old guy's day. When I rang the doorbell, this "old guy" came to the door dressed in tennis shorts and a polo shirt, looking about as ancient and decrepit as Donny Osmond.

"I'm sorry I can't invite you in," he said when I introduced myself, "but I'm due at the Racquet Club at two. I'm playing in the semifinals today."
"Oh, that's all right," I said. "I baked you some brownies..."
"Great!", he interrupted, snatching the box, "Just what I need for bridge club tomorrow! Thanks so much!"
"...and just thought we'd visit a while, but that's okay, I'll just trot across the street and call on Granny Grady..."
"Don't bother," he said, "Gran's not home. I know, I just called to remind her of our date to go dancing tonight. She may be at the beauty shop. She mentioned at breakfast that she had an appointment for a tint job."

I called my Mother's cousin (age 83), she was in the hospital... working in the gift shop. I called my aunt (age 74); she was on vacation in China. I called my husband's uncle (age 79). I forgot, he was on his honeymoon. I still dread old age, now more than ever. I just don't think I'm up to it.....










ROSE


The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn't already know.  I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.

I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her entire being.  She said, "Hi handsome.  My name is Rose.  I'm eighty-seven years old.  Can I give you a hug?"
I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!"  She gave me a giant squeeze.
"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.
She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, have a couple of kids, and then retire and travel."
"No seriously," I asked.  I was curious what may have motivated her to be taking on this challenge at her age.

"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting one!" she told me. After class we walked to the student union building and shared a chocolate milkshake.  We became instant friends.   Every day for the next three months we would leave class together and talk non-stop.   I was always mesmerized listening to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me. 

Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily made friends wherever she went. 
  She loved to dress up and she revelled in the attention bestowed upon her from the other students.  She was living it up.

At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football banquet.  I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and stepped up to the podium.  As she began to deliver her prepared speech,  she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.
Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so  jittery.  I gave up beer for Lent and this whiskey is killing me!  I'll never get my speech back in order so let me just tell you what I know."

As we laughed she cleared her throat and began,
"We do not stop playing because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing.  There are only four secrets.  Laugh and find humor every day.   You've got to have a dream. 
When you lose your dreams, you die.  We have so many people walking around who are dead and don't even know it!  There is a huge difference between growing older and growing up. 
If you are nineteen years old and lie in bed for one full year and don't do one productivething, you will turn twenty years old.  

If I am eighty- seven years old and stay in bed for a year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight. 
Anybody can grow older. That doesn't take any talent or ability.   The idea is to grow up by always finding the opportunity in change.  Have no regrets.  The elderly usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did not do.  The only people who fear death are those with regrets."

She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."  She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our daily lives.

At the year's end, Rose finished the college degree she had begun all those years ago. One week after graduation, Rose died peacefully in her sleep. More than two thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be all you can possibly be.




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