Netscape. Its Whack

I was applying for a Job recently and was asked if I tested my pages in Netscape. I said "What the hell is that?" They told me it was a browser. I said " Ow yea that thing that used to big the steering wheel on a boat, but now its an icon of a N on a planet.

So I decided to check my site out in Netscape

However first I needed to download it. Now this is one of those whack downloads where you select the components you want and such. It tries to play with you. That status bar is totally done, and then it starts loading the next thing. So I was waiting to go asleep at 1:30 in the morning and I was not sure when the damn thing was going to finish.

So I go and load my site and OMG is it screwed up. Sometimes the browser just closes. The applets never load right. The cascading style sheets do not work and the font looks dumb. In other words everything is just all fed up.

So I thought to check some other sites of mine.

Lets look at my Java Script spot site in IE

Look at the way the site lines up pay particular attention to the DROP DOWN BANNER that does not appear in NETSCAPE.

Now if that was the only problem I would say hey no big deal. I figured the one saving grace was that the geocities banner did not load in Netscape. However it turns out I was not that lucky in that regard. as you can see here.

I mean what the fuck is that? Don't you think Netscape knows there browser wont show a geocities page right?

Can it get any worse? Of course it can. Lets look at a site I got paid for in IE

Now is that nice or what sure the blue divide does not make any sense but I could not get rid of it because the guy wanted it. What can I say?

Lets look at that same page in queerscape. I mean Netscape

What the fuck is that banner does all the way over there. That's crazy. Its like in the alpha quadrant with star trek voyage or something. 

However it could get worse here is a custom made table set

Hey yea pretty cool effect its like a little sectioned page. Well in Netscape I can not tell what the heck it is. You try to figure it out.

There you have it. Netscape = whack

My site sucks lately. 

Well that is what Mike always says. "Hey Ed where is the content filled update." "That was definitely NOT CLASSIC" This is coming from the guy who last had a site update was like in the 20th century. 

Well I do my best. What can I say. Its not like I promise people I am going to write them a song or anything and then NEVER do it. Apo Networks was created for only one purpose. 

It was made so I could find a way to deal with all the stress. It happens to be funny because I am funny, but its main purpose was to relieve the stress I receive. I know I along the way I did not spell a lot right and whatever but that is the way it is.

Lately I have been able to relieve my stress in other ways. Namely I found most of my darts that mysteriously vanished from my room. 

Did I mention how we nearly suffocated Tim? 

That's right we were all sitting out in front of the boat trying to kill some time. And someone says hey I want to go in the trunk. So we put Tim in the trunk and lock him in. Basically Tim's is just chilling in the trunk and Mike and I go on with our conversation. 

So I see some people walking up the street.

" Mike lets open up the trunk. They will think its a body in there. "

So Mike opens up the trunk in front of two people on the street and starts punching Tim in the Trunk. Then he slams the trunk shut. Then he looks at me with this funny look.

"Ed do you have the keys?"

"No. You had them. You opened the trunk."

Yes it seemed as Mike was punching Tim he dropped the keys in the trunk and then closed it. That was classic. Lucky for Tim we had an extra set of keys.

We did get Tim out in about a minute. He did not come very close to suffocating at all, however my quick thinking and running quickly into the house is still considered a saved life in my book bringing the total lives saved up to 2001.