FF7 Goes to Knotts Berry Farm
by Mindy Kisaragi

"YUFFIE!!!!"Vincent screamed as he ran after the dishonest kid...trying to get his Death Penalty.

"IT'S MINE!!!"she turned to the gun and examined it closely,staring into the barrel and trigger.

"Yuffie,I told you you could come along if you promised not to steal attributes."Cloud ordered.

Yuffie turned,quite insulted she was, and stuck her tongue out."It's my daddy's gun! And it's a WEAPON..,"she corrected angrily."NOT a tributary."

"That's ATTRIBUTE." Cloud corrected. He then started thinking of how peaceful it would be if she were to not come and just stay with her father. Cloud had only told his best buddies about his mission at the amusement park.

It was a pretty clear mission...as clear as the day that the sun had made before them.

He had not invited Barret and Cid,due to the large amount of profanity used in almost every sentence. Tifa was coming,but not through an invitation,through her own idea of wanting to come. He had enjoyed being able to talk to her now that Aeris had passed away through an accident. Cait Sith said he was a bit busy but would try to fit Cloud's Amusement mission into his schedule. Cait Sith was now a well known speaker for Rejected Spies of the Games or RSG. Cloud then came to the enterance. The ticket master asked,flatly with an unchanging tone of voice"May I have you tickets please."

Tifa grinned"Yes you may."She showed the ticket that Cloud had perchased for her and asked to the what seemed to be an airheaded ticket master"May I come in?"

"Sure Miss."he still had his flat toned voice.

"Uh....I'm guessing that's a yes."Tifa started for the twriling population thingy,and went in.

Cloud proudly marched up to the ticket master."I'm with AVALANCHE."

The ticket master didn't move a muscle and Cloud wondered if he was awake or asleep."Hello?"he waved his hand in front of the ticket man's face.

He then woke up,so it seemed. He pulled out one of the reservation clip boards and checked off"AVALANCHE." He then turned to Cloud and his friends and commented in the flat toned voice"You may enter."

Cloud entered to accompany Tifa and also to examine what the amusement park looked like. It was full of metal rollar coasters, and trains and blacksmiths.

"THIS IS WHAT I CAME FOR???#^$#^$%#^$#!!!!I AM GONNA ASK THOSE $%^$%&$% FOR MY #^#$%^ MONEY BACK!!!"Cid,who had taken a trip to Knotts cried as he found that it was only a bunch of beepedy beep junk...to him that is.

"CID!!!,"Cait Sith moaned. Indeed the stuffed mog and kitty had made it to a once in a lifetime event."Quit eating all my ice cream!!"Cait Sith's stuffed mog had recieved a double mint n chip ice cream cone and Cid had taken to take a little lick. What he did though was swallow practically the whole flavored ice thing whole.

"But it's YUMMY!"Cid complained,as Cait Sith angrily snatched the cone out of his hand and ordered his moogle to punch Cid all the way to the first drop on Ghostrider.

The moogle obeyed, and Cid was literally blasted off.

Cait Sith then turned"HI Cloud...Tifa..."It began enthusiastically. It then changed it's tone as it glanced at the others. His tone changed from energetic to bored sounding and a moan."Yuffie....Vincent..."

"What are ya talkin' about?"Yuffie asked with her childish tone.

"Nothing....,"Cait Sith turned and pulled out a bottle with multi colored sand in it."like my creation?"it asked with anticipation.

"Well I think it's good."Tifa replied making the cat and moogle bounce in joy.

"It's...um...well.."Cloud began,but was interupted by Yuffie.

"Y'know that's FREAKY lookin' ok? THAT's what it is!"

"Yuffie..."Tifa turned, angrily shaming the 16 year old.

"WEll it is!"Yuffie replied continuing to argue with Tifa.

"Tifa don't argue with her...she's only a kid...so she doesn't need another mother."Vincent growled.

"Why are you protecting me Vincent?"Yuffie growled at her protector.

"Guys guys...,"Cloud tried to hold the whole team together."I invited you people here on an important legal matter."He ordered that peace be declared and if not to move out,he had hoped. What he got however was a bunch of yells out of Tifa,Yuffie and Cait Sith. Vincent stood silently by.

"Well,I'll let them figure out where to meet."Cloud turned to Vincent.

***

As Cloud approached the first ride, known as Boomerang,he spotted a certain someone in the line. He said to himself quit foolin' yourself she's dead already! But no...he couldn't take his eyes off of the girl.

The girl then turned as the world came to a halt to Cloud.IT WAS HER!!AERIS!!She was actually here in person. Her green eyes caught Cloud's and she recognized him right away.

"Cloud?"she asked with curiousity.

"Aeris!"Cloud replied,part in surprise and part in fear.

They were two isles apart,but that didn't stop them. Cloud skipped over the two isle bars,and Aeris waited for Cloud's mako blue eyes to lay them upon hers and....

"Cloud!"Tifa growled from the back of the line.

"Uh oh."Cloud thought.

"What is it Cloud?"Tifa asked,trying to keep up with Cloud's fast pace.

Cloud trailed down into the crowd and reached Aeris.

"How did you get here?"he asked the girl he had once rememebered weeping over.

"Well,actually,um....,"Aeris stopped and rubbed Cloud's arm. She then changed the subject."You must have had to train hard to get these types of muscles."

"Well,I DID train hard."Cloud replied.

"Cloud!Wait!You said you were going to wait for me!"Tifa growled.

"Um...I did?"Cloud asked.

"YES!"Tifa growled once again.

"Sorry....uh...,"he turned to Aeris."sorry Aeris,but I promised Tifa that I would ride with her."

Aeris grinned"That's okay....I didn't think you would be here...,"she blushed as the next sentence came to her mouth."because I promised to ride with someone else too."

Cloud smiled,he was relieved that Aeris wasn't mad. He had to put up with so much of her anger with Tifa and him being together. He strolled back to the back of the line."Hey Tifa...I thought I saw Aeris and it WAS Aeris...."

"It's about time you came back....I'm getting tired of people asking if I'm taken by someone or not...now that you're here,I can say 'yep'."

"I guess."Cloud replied.

To Yuffie.......

"WHAT?!"Yuffie asked angrily at the video arcade. She was playing a video game called LOCKE,THE GREAT RELIC HUNTER.

(Author's Note:This is no true video game)

She had lost one relic to it being stolen by some people. Ruthlessly and repetetiously, she kicked the video game machine "I DIDN'T HAVE ANY FREAKING RELICS!! HOW CAN I GET A RELIC STOLEN IF I DON'T HAVE ANY?!"she growled and turned to the long line behind her. Six and seven year olds sat waiting for their turn to play the theif.

"Can I play?"one of them asked.

"NO!"Yuffie turned back to the video game and inserted another silver gil coin. She played and played,and beat the first level. Then a sign came on. It read,Please insert another coin.

"STUPID FREAKIN' VIDEO GAME OF STUPID RELICS THAT YOU CAN'T EVEN FIND!"Yuffie kicked it again.

Just then she felt a grab on her shoulder"Stop that Yuffie."Vincent,who was ALWAYS sometimes used for her babysitter, ordered.

Yuffie was red with fury and anger. She flushed in embarrassment"Uh....yeah...sorry."

Vincent gave the kids a glance and one stood in awe. "A REAL VAMPIRE!!!WOH!!! COOL!!!"they all cooed.

"I love vampires."another awed,and reached for Vincent's arm.

"Hey hey hey!"Vincent growled."Don't touch the cape!"

Vincent grabbed the kid's arm,and scratched it.

"Ow!"the kid cried.

"Uh oh,"Yuffie ordered."You've done it now."

"Shut up Yuffie..."Vincent snarled at Yuffie angrily.

"um,can we uh.....get outta here!"Yuffie pushed Vincent like a shield and they rammed into a man with a gun/arm.

"What the heck do you two numskulls want?"the man asked with a squeaky deep voice.

"Barret Wallace...just the man I was looking for...,"Vincent shoved Yuffie into Barret."take care of this baby. She is in need of some special MANLY,"Vincent gave Barret a wink. "help."

"What?!"Yuffie shrieked."I don't need any help! I need some excitement since I can't go on a ride without barfing up my lunch!"

"Whatever Yuffie!"Vincent growled and roamed away.

***

After Boomerang Tifa and Cloud decided to check out the Ice Cream Parlor. It was somewhat old and also somewhat tidy.

"I wonder if they have the old fashioned ice cream sundaes I liked when I was little."Tifa thought out loud.

"I bet they do....my mother said that this place has been around since she was a kid."Cloud replied.

They sat down at a table. Tifa was first to speak."So....what do you want from this parlor?"

Cloud shrugged as usual."I can't fool around the entire time..I have a mission here you know."

Tifa giggled."You're not fooling around though."

Cloud nodded"Yes I am."

"How are you fooling around?"Tifa asked with much anticipation.

Cloud thought then grinned"Eating ice cream from a stupid parlor."

"This place isn't stupid,"Tifa argued."please tell me you take that back."

"I don't..... Tifa I'm sorry but I've got more important things to fulfill before I start to sit down and eat ice cream."Cloud got up and left the table and then sat at the bar.

Tifa scowled for a second,then started for the bar. She wasn't giving up,she was determined that Cloud HAD to relax and not think of his work all the time. "Excuse me..."she asked one of the employees."May I come in?"

"Sure."the employee replied.

Tifa stepped behind the bar and approached Cloud."Would you like to have something to drink?"she asked.

Cloud shook his head."No thanks."

"OH!"Tifa growled,and slammed her fist on the bar just like that time at the Seventh Heaven."WELL SOME PEOPLE SAY I MAKE THE BEST DRINKS OUT OF ALL THE PEOPLE WHO RUN BARS IN THE SLUMS!"

Cloud looked up to see Tifa. He laughed and Tifa gave him a grin.

"Well at least some one remembers the night at the 7th Heaven."she laughed.

To Vincent......

Vincent strolled along the long deserted ideal road of Ghosttown."Finally,"he thought."no Yuffie I have to keep track of anymore....nobody here except me myself and I...nothing could be more perfect."

Just then Vincent thought he saw some woman who he had once loved.

"Lucrecia?"Vincent questioned in disbelief."She was supposed to be dead..."he rubbed his eyes and looked at the figure again."I...I thought she was dead.." he strolled over to what he saw as Lucrecia. But he was wrong...ALL wrong!

"So now...where did Cloud say he was going next?"a mad scientist looking man asked.

"I will never tell." a female replied, who was tied onto a chair.

When one of the soldiers held up a gun to her neck she answered.

"THE-THE...,"she stopped for a second to try to rememeber what the place was.

The mad scientist grinned an evil grin."Tell us or I shall inject you with Jenova cells."

"Uh..Uh..."the female had forgotten.

"Tell me kid you're time is growing short."

"The Soap Box racers."the female admitted.

"Thank you."the mad scientist smiled.

"HEY!"Vincent called to the scientist and as the scientist turned he recognized him. His big forehead, his weird voice,they could only belong to one person and one person only,Hojo."Hojo?"

"aaah...Vincent...my precious specimen....Lucrecia is dead if you came looking for her."

Vincent eyed the professor who had made him the way he was. He then took one good look at the female and recognized her. It was "Aeris?!"Vincent swallowed a huge lump in his throat."I-I thought you were dead!"

"I'm not dead!" Aeris growled.

"Oh nonsense of course you're dead!"

"NO I'M NOT!!!"Aeris grabbed Vincent choked him.

"My prescious...just stop that."Hojo cried.

"But-"Aeris started.

"Let him go!"Hojo ordered.

Aeris let the vampire go."Sorry."

Vincent sulked in anger."Hojo...will you PLEASE get outta here?!"

"Put a cork in it vampire!"Hojo growled.

"Not a bad idea."Aeris smiled.

"Shut up!,"Vincent growled."I think you've sold one too many flowers."

"Are you saying I'm drunk?!"Aeris asked.

"No not at all but you just act so immature for being of your age."Vincent added.

Those were the last words that Hojo wanted to hear out of Vincent's mouth and he knocked him out.

***

Tifa was afraid of Cloud and his attitude to kill whatever it was he had to kill in the first place. Since Cloud was still in SOLDIER he had gotten more and more tense and more and more strict on what to do and how to do it. "Cloud has simply become a man,rather then a boy in a man's suit."Barretbox would say,and was true...kind of.

Tifa couldn't handle hearing that Cloud was in SOLDIER because of having Sephiroth kill her Papa,she had made a promise to herself that night,before she was severely wounded,'Never let a SOLDIER come to you or bother you and your bussiness'

"TIFA????"Cloud shouted.

Tifa regained conciousness and saw Cloud holding his sword up ready to slice her in two.His mako blue eyes gave a glow as she spotted a man in the background with glowing green mako eyes. The man gave a smirk and said."Knock her OUT!!"

Cloud growled and glared at Tifa. He started towards her and Tifa kicked him in fear. As Cloud fell she fealt sympathetic for her kick,but it was only a blow to get the point across to Cloud. A blow was all it was going to be and a blow was what was to become of it.

Cloud fell and agonized,then with some help from that man,he was back on his feet.

"This is going to take a great deal of power."Tifa thought to herself.

***

Yuffie had grown tired of Barret's lectures on how to shoot the targets the right way. She was at the shooting gallery and wasn't doing too well,due to Barret's lame coaching.

"Okay Yuffo,"Barret smiled."just start by shooting that tiny bullet to that tiny target."

"Will you shut up already???"Yuffie growled after missing a target.

Barret went balistic and shot at all the targets,he got all of them...except one.

An alarm went off and yelled"GOOD SCORE GOOD SCORE GOOD SCORE!!"

Barret turned to Yuffie"That's how you shoot."

"Tiny bullets eh??"Yuffie questioned.

"Yes they are tiny but it's up to you what to do with them."

"Uh...yeah."Yuffie then walked right up to the ice cream shop.

When she entered she saw Tifa on her knees,gasping for air. Yuffie scratched her head and then fell in agony.

"seph-Sephiroth attacked h-here."Cloud stuttered.

"Cloud!"Tifa ran over to Cloud.

"T-Tifa...,"Cloud cried from the ground"Y-you're here?"

"Of course I am."Tifa replied,with tears streaming from her eyes.

"O-Oh...."Cloud replied.

Tifa supported the head of Cloud.

Yuffie yelled from the ground"CURE HIM YOU IDIOT!"

Tifa put up her hands up in fighting poses,then realized that she couldn't fix anything by fighting and casted cure on Cloud.

Cloud got up and stumbled to the door."T-t-to....to the train!"he stuttered over the sentence with both fear and gasping for life in his words.

Tifa and Yuffie followed Cloud as he found the train inhabitted by some people in black.

Tifa sat down and Cloud followed her. He sat down next to her.

Yuffie was left to sit on the other isle seat. She glanced at Cloud and Tifa. She then freaked out as she heard a noise of "PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR OR I'LL HAVE MY BUDDY HERE CHOP THEM OFF!!!!!!"

Tifa put her hands in the air."I surrender."With one glance at the person who was walking down the isle with a person holding a gun she realized that they were the play robbers.

Yuffie saw a red dog-like animal creep up to the seat next to her."Good day to 'ya Yuffie."it proclaimed in a show off type of way.

Yuffie turned,her green face met the red face of none other then RedXIII.

The smartest specie had actually wasted his time to talk to Yuffie.

"Okay...We've got ourselves a mission here,and it's all good if you twerps keep your so-called innocent little traps shut."one of the robbers ordered.

With a signal of the hand his bald friend pulled out a gun.

"Nobody move,or you're gonna have to give us millions of gil."the bald one ordered.

Yuffie glared at the robbers and then a thought of TURKS hit her mind.

"TURKS?!"she questioned outloud.

The bald person turned."...................."

The other turned to Yuffie and snapped"Yeah we're here!"

Yuffie growled."leave us....the dog eats strangers."she growled as the robbers laughed.

"Reno......."Tifa moaned dispizingly. She had to endure them once and didn't really WANT to endure their attitudes again.

Just then,Cloud burst in."LEAVE HER ALONE!!"he ordered.

Reno smirked at Cloud after turning at the sudden noise."Which girl do you want me to leave to their peace?"

Cloud looked at Tifa and then to Yuffie. He began to think....think hard....something he hadn't done before...

"HURRY UP MAN...YOU'RE WASTIN' MY TIME!!"Reno growled with impatience.

"Leave Tifa be."Cloud growled as Reno snapped his fingers in disappointment.

"Crud!"Yuffie screamed as Reno picked her up.

"RedXIII?"Cloud found RedXIII sitting next to the window.

"What shall I say to you Cloud?"RedXIII replied.

"Have you......played the Sharpshooter game?"Cloud asked.

"Please......you know my story."RedXIII growled back.

"WEll I think we had better look on getting out of here.....it's dangorous after all..."Tifa informed.

"Yes...we just have to find the others."Cloud replied.

"CaitSith and Yuffie'll probably want to stay. After all,they are kids at heart."REdXIII informed.

"What about Barret and Cid?"Tifa asked.

"They can find their own way out...I don't mean to sound cold but....they DO bug."Cloud nodded.

"And Vincent?"

"Vincent didn't come.....he had to catch up with Lucrecia."RedXIII informed.

"Well.....PLEASE can we just go on one more ride?"

RedXIII coughed."I can't go on....no dogs allowed....unfortunately."

Tifa turned to RedXIII"Then meet by the shooting gallery in a half hour."

RedXIII"Okay....I'll be there..."

Tifa grinned and turned back to Cloud as the train stopped.

"Well let's go...."Cloud smiled.

Tifa fealt a light flash in her heart,took a deep breath and exited off the train with Cloud.

"What ride?"Cloud asked.

"Ummmm.....how about Montezoma's....wait no....Ghostrider....I hear it's a good ride."Tifa replied with a smile.

"Ghostrider's in the sky then!"Cloud nodded and took Tifa to the line of the Ghostrider roller coaster.

In the line,Cloud and Tifa were catching up on old times.

"I wonder Cloud......have you ever riden this roller coaster?" Tifa asked.

"I doubt it."Cloud replied.

***

As they approached the exit,Cloud and Tifa couldn't figure out what had happened,all they knew was that the mission was fraud. Nothing that Cloud had imagined had happened. However,everyone came....and that was what he adored the most. Tifa smiled and placed her hand on Cloud's shoulder"You know.....I had a really great time tonight....,"she started to get tears in her eyes"I'm really gonna miss ya Cloud...."she smiled.

Cloud had to go to SOLDIER once again. He had assignments to fulfill,dreams to dream....and hopes to hold on to. Tifa was probably going to be the last person to forget from the months...and years of killing out the Shinra and Sephiroth. And then....having to return to SOLDIER.He thought."I'm gonna miss everyone here."He broke into tears as the engine bell rang for Midgar train.He had only a few minutes to tell how the Knotts trip taught him moral values."Tifa....I will miss you...and how you always followed me making sure I was okay...Aeris....I will miss you for all the flower stuff that you gave me...Yuffie...............eh.........Yuffie......eh!Barret and Cid for how much you two hoodlums cussed!RedXIII for how much you taught me about.......stuff..........Cait Sith....I'll miss your peppy attitude.....and.........Vincent....eh......Vincent...eh!" He stopped talking and started for the train.

Indeed the Knotts trip had taught him moral values.

***

As Tifa and all the others started the long walk back to Kalm,many things went on. For example,RedXIII puked up a hairball and Yuffie had found a materia hidden inside. Then just the sight of the barf made her barf all over Barret and Cid. Tifa was in the middle of it all. Nothing would ever replace the night she had with Cloud on the trip......except maybe...the date, and night she had with Cloud on the Highwind.


THE END


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