Street Wise
by Cloud Strife

It's August, 16th (My birthday! Yahoo) Tifa and I are at the Gold Saucer Restaurant with some kind of surprise hid in her mind!

Cloud: Tifa, I appreciate you bringing me for dinner. But you didn't have to!

Tifa: Of course I did!

Waiter: Order please?

I take a peek at the menu

Cloud: Okay I'll have a Chocobo sausage with chips and a drink of your best wine!

Waiter: Great order! And you madam?

Tifa: I'll have the same as Cloud!

Waiter: Okay!

The waiter runs off yelling to the chef! I look at Tifa in the eyes!

Cloud: Man your eye's are beautiful tonight!

Tifa started to blush

Tifa: Thank you Cloud! You look so handsome.

Cloud: Thanks!

A bit later, after our meal

Tifa: Cloud, I would like to give you your birthday present.

Tifa hands me a small rapped up box

Cloud: Arrr!

I start to open the gift then opening the box

Cloud:…

Tifa: Well?

It was a little shiny photo Album

Cloud: Tifa, this is the kindest gift I ever got. Thank you!

I kiss Tifa on the head.

Waiter: Okay, 50'000 gil!

Cloud: Okay!

I get my wallet out with Tifa stopping me

Tifa: Don't be silly Cloud! It's your birthday, I'll pay!

Tifa gets her purse out giving the guy 70'000 gil!

Tifa: And have 20'000 gil tip! Thank you!

Waiter: Thanks ma'am.

Tifa and I walk out the restaurant!

Cloud: I need to go to the toilet! Be right back!

I run off to the toilet with Tifa getting a telephone out

Tifa: Barret!

Barret: Yeah?

Tifa: We're coming home! Be about 20 minutes okay? You at my house?

Barret: Yeah!

Tifa: Oh gotta dash! Bye!

Tifa hangs up when I run out!

Cloud: I needed that! Heh heh heh! Come on! Let's go home!

I put my arm on Tifa's shoulder!

Cloud: Thank you for the wonderful evening!

Tifa: Your welcome Cloud!

Many punks come out with guns!

Cloud: Dammit! On a great night jerks like you had to come!

Punk: Gimme all your dosh!

Cloud: Never!

Tifa and I run to the punks and start fighting!

Cloud: If only I had my buster sword!

I saw a sword on the floor! Reminded me of Sasuke's sword! Who cares? I'll just use it!

Punk: Drop the sword kid!

Punk's with machine guns don't scare me!

Cloud: Sephiroth Incomplete!

I did the 3 slash's of Sephiroth!

Tifa: Final Heaven!

Tifa used one of the most brutal punch's to live!

Punk: Time to get dosh!

The punk picked Tifa up by her legs shaking her!

Punk: Gimme your cash sexy!

Tifa: GET OFF ME!

Cloud: LEAVE HER ALONE!

Punk: Oh shut up!

The punk hit me with a bullet!

Cloud: Ah!

Tifa: Heal!

Tifa used the magic heal to heal my wound!

Tifa: Full Cure!

The magic got me my strength back!

Cloud: Thanks Tifa! OMNISLASH!

Time for the Omnislash as you know it's my most brutal move!

Punk: You, you'll die one day!

Cloud: Yeah! That's one day!

Tifa falls to the floor hitting her head!

Cloud: TIFA!

I run up to Tifa! I hold her head up!

Cloud: Tifa? Answer me!

Tifa wakes up

Tifa: W, where am I?

Cloud: TIFA!

I start to hug Tifa tight!

Tifa: What, happened?

Cloud: You'll be alright! We better get you home!

I help Tifa up!

Cloud: C'mon!

Tifa: Okay!

Cloud: Maybe you should go to bed!

I open up the door!

Everyone: SURPRISE CLOUD!

I vibrate in shock!

Cloud: Damn that was good!

Tifa: Happy birthday Cloud!

Barret: Lucky spiky a**!

Cloud: Thanks Barret!

Dan: Alright Cloud?

Nick: Yo Cloud!

Alex: Ayup Cloud!

Matt: Hi Cloud!

Karissa: Hello Cloud!

Bebs: S'up Cloud?

Cloud: Hi Dan, Karissa, Matt, Nick, Bebs and Alex!

Dan: Cloud, take this!

I take the present from him! I scratch the side of my head

Cloud: Uh, what is it?

Dan: (Sigh) It's a playstation with a copy of Final Fantasy VII and EHRGEIZ from us kids!

Cloud: Thanks!

Barret: I'll have to take that off you!

Cloud: You could never take me on!

Barret: This is for you Cloud!

I open Barret's present!

Cloud: A sword…

Barret: Not jes' any sword!

Red XIII: Not a sword your daughter made!

Barret: Hell no!

Marlene kicks Barret's leg!

Marlene: DON'T INSULT ME DADDY!

Barret: I wasn't darlin'!

Marlene: Good!

Barret: Yo as I was saying, it's a sword only you can use without these special gloves! Otherwise, they'll get paralysed!

Red XIII: Take this Cloud!

Red toss's up the present by this tail!

Cloud: Woah! A bowling ball!

Red XIII: Yeah, and hard to carry for my back!

Cloud: I'll have to go bowling with you guys sometime!

Everyone except I looks at Yuffie

Yuffie: What?

Cid: Didn't you get Cloud anything!

Yuffie: Oh all right! Here Cloud!

Yuffie placed a green ball of materia into my hand! I took Yuffie outside for a minute!

Cloud: But, isn't this your favourite piece of materia?

Yuffie: yeah! They looked at me weirdly!

Cloud: To be honest, I thought that was thoughtful Yuffie!

I get out a piece of materia!

Cloud: I've been meaning to owe you this! I kept forgetting and it may be my birthday but here! Here's the materia I owed you!

I placed a piece a materia in Yuffie's hands!

Cloud: Use this powerful materia! Make me proud in battle Yuffie!

Yuffie: What, what materia is it?

Cloud: Bahamut ZERO!

Yuffie: ALL RIGHT! THANKS CLOUD!

Yuffie sits down!

Cloud: Is that the first time I've heard her say thank you?

Vincent: I think so Cloud!

Cloud: (Sighs)

Cid: Here Cloud!

I opened up Cid's present!

Cid: It's from Shera too!

Cloud: Cool! A punch bag shaped like Sephiroth! Cheers Cid!

Vincent: This may be useful to you Cloud!

I take Vincent's present!

Cloud: Er, what is it?

Vincent: A Halloween costume!

Cloud: Vince, I appreciate it but it's August 16th!

Vincent: Damn!

Cloud: Thanks to you all but, where's Cait Sith? Cait Sith: Here's your present! Sorry I'm late!

I open the present of the cat!

Cloud: Um, a microphone!

Cait Sith: Just so you can shut Barret up!

Barret: HEY!

Cloud: BE QUIET!

Barret falls over!

Cloud: Woah, this is damn good!

Cait Sith: Now Barret can't boss you round without going death!

Tifa giggles!

Cloud: Hey Tifa why haven't you said anything in a while?

Tifa: I'm sorry Cloud! I've been a bit speechless!

Barret:: I suppose we better leave you two be!

Dan: Barret, can us guys stay at your place?

Barret: Sure Er,

Karissa: Got no names to call us eh? (Giggles)

Nick: Oh shut up and let's get the hell outta here!

Everyone walks outside! I look at Tifa tossing her in the air and catching her!

Cloud: Thank you for a wonderful evening!

Cloud JR: Yo Dad I can see you!

Tina: Your sick!

Cloud: hey kids, your meant to be in bed!

I pick the kids up!

Cloud: Stay in bed! I need to talk to your mom!

I walk out the room walking outside with Tifa!

Cloud: I'll say it again, thank you for this amazing evening! It's been a miracle!

Sephiroth appears!

Sephiroth: It's your birthday? How rude of me to forget, here you go!

Cloud: Uh Sephiroth, it's a dirty 0.1 gil sweet!

Sephiroth: Shut up!

I get out my microphone!

Cloud: YOU SHUT UP DAMN YOU!

Tifa starts to giggle her head off! Sephiroth grabs Tifa and puts his sword around his neck!

Sephiroth: Shut up or I put the girl's head with my collection of dead people's and animals heads!

Cloud: Leave Tifa alone!

I get out the sword I got from Barret!

Cloud: Or die!

Sephiroth flies away with Tifa!

Cloud: TIFA! NO!

I fall to the floor crying!

Cloud: How could this happen? Why did this happen to me? On my birthday!

I walk indoors!

Cloud: I, must call Barret and AVALANCHE!

Barret: Hi, but it is 1 am!

Cloud: Barret, I need your help! They kidnapped Tifa!

Barret: Who?

Cloud: Sephiroth!

Barret: We'll be here as soon as we can!

Cloud: I'll have to protect the house!

I press a button to the kids door! They can't get out!

Cloud: Must get into more warrior clothes, not my suit!

I get changed so quickly! About 20 minutes later!

Cloud: Won't they ever come!

Matt: Here Cloud!

Cloud: Thank God!

Dan: So what's the mission?

Cloud: Our mission is to find Sephiroth!

Bebs: Haven't you killed him yet?

Cloud: Somehow, he keeps coming back to life!

Alex: What Final Fantasy is this to you know Cloud?

Cloud: It feels like Final Fantasy XII

Karissa: That explains it then!

Cloud: We need teams of 4! I'll take…

Dan: Me!

Karissa: Please?

Bebs: Me?

Cloud: That's my team sorted out! We'll go to Sephiroth's fortress

Dan: He may have trapped Tifa!

Cloud: I'd not like to think about that! We better save her!

My squad and I started running to the fortress

Dan: Shinra SOLDIERS!

Bebs: Damn boy I thought you killed Shinra!

Cloud: I did but SOLDIER still hunt the towns for Mako!

Karissa: Jerks! Now, where's my sword?

Dan: I have mine, Ultimate End.

Bebs: Here's my rod!

Cloud: Ready?

Dan: Yeah!

There were 4 SOLDIER's round here!

SOLDIER 1: What the hell?

Cloud: DAH! DEATHBLOW!

SOLDIER 4: We can't hold the man up but the kid's will be easy!

Karissa: Never call me weak!

Karissa ran up to SOLDIER 4 using manipulate!

Karissa: Shoot your self!

The SOLDIER used his machine gun on himself!

Bebs: Grrrr, hyperactive jump!

She must've learned that from Cid!

SOLDIER: Oh f***!

SOLDIER 3: That kid? He may be big but he can't hold up to my machine gun!

SOLDIER 3 used his gun with Dan avoiding each shot!

SOLDIER 3: Damn!

Dan: Time to try my new limit, SOUL BLAZER!

Dan used his new limit, Soul Blazer that was a bit like Omnislash but with different slash's!

Cloud: Lets finish this SOLDIER off, SEPHIROTH INCOMPLETE!

Karissa leaped onto the SOLDIER's shoulder's punching his face in!

Karissa: Didn't you hear? You’re a wimp to beat girls up!

Bebs using her limit break, swinging smash spinning round hitting the SOLDIER!

Bebs: Get outta here! You're easier than on Final Fantasy VII!

And Dan using another limit, Lightning Strike!

Dan: LIGHTNING STRIKE!

The move was like meteorrain except with lightning!

Dan: WE DID IT!

Karissa: Too easy!

We continued the search for Tifa but it was harder than we thought!

Cloud: Where is Sephiroth's fortress?

Dan: I dunno! You're meant to know!

Karissa: What's that gay big building over there with a sword like Sephiroth's sword on top of it?

Dan: It looks so gay alright Karissa!

Bebs: Tee hee!

Cloud: Let's check it out! It could be Sephiroth's fortress!

Dan gets out a pair of binoculars

Dan: Yo Cloud, it IS Sephiroth's sword well a model of it!

Dan looks closer!

Dan: You know Sephiroth is sick?

Cloud: Yeah?

Bebs takes the binoculars off Dan!

Bebs: Yuck! It's Aeris's dead body on it!

Dan throws up!

Dan: Damn that is sick!

Cloud: SEPHIROTH I WILL KILL YOU!

Karissa: Lets go!

We get to the fortress

Barret: Yo you guys finally here!

Karissa: We had to take on Shinra SOLDIER's!

Barret: Damn boy I thought you killed Shinra!

Cloud: Barret shut up man! Lets go in the same teams we were in before!

Barret: Awright!

Red XIII: We'll be with you all the way Cloud!

Yuffie: Can't wait to use Bahamut ZERO!

Cloud: Let's go!

Alex: Dan, you fought SOLDIER's? Lucky devil!

Dan: It were too easy! They couldn't shoot me cuz I'm so quick! Heh!

Matt: We just ran here!

Dan: Boring man!

Karissa: We better look for Tifa!

Cloud: Yeah. Let's go!

We ran into the fortress!

Cloud: Barret, you take the route on the right, we'll take left!

Barret: Awright!

We run to our routes checking the place!

Cloud: Will we ever find Tifa?

Karissa: Don't lose confidence Cloud!

Bebs: That's just how it is!

Dan: Don't worry Cloud, just remember, we're with you all the way!

Cloud: Alright! Lets keep goin'!

We now see where Sephiroth and Tifa are!

Sephiroth: You can tell me the weakness of Cloud or get fried!

Tifa was hanging over a flaming pit!

Tifa: Never!

: Maybe find out yourself! The weakness of Cloud is you killing Tifa which will lose his confidence!

Sephiroth: Who is that fool?

Tifa: Please HELP ME MR!

: His name is Dan!

Sephiroth: Dan?

Karissa: Let Tifa go now!

Cloud: Or prepare to fight!

Bebs: That’s how it is!

Dan: Sephiroth, you can't take us all on! Cloud, help Tifa, we'll start on Sephiroth!

Bebs: DAN?

Dan: I'm serious! C'mon girls! Cloud?

Cloud: Okay?

Dan: Hold my hands Karissa!

Karissa: Why?

Dan: (Whispering) Battle strategy!

Karissa: Okay!

Karissa grabs Dan's hands!

Dan: Feel the pain!

Dan starts swinging Karissa round hitting Sephiroth in the face! They draw their weapons!

Dan: Sephiroth, give up!

Sephiroth: Never!

Bebs: You asked for it!

Cloud climbs on the cage trying to help Tifa but pulls the cage off!

Cloud: Oh dammit!

Dan: CLOUD!

Dan left Karissa and Bebs to fight!

Karissa: DAN!!!!!!!

Dan ignored Karissa and pulled me away from the fire!

Tifa: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Cloud: TIFA!

I grabbed the cage!

SLICE!

Dan: What the?

Dan looks at Karissa!

Dan: KARISSA!

Karissa started to breathe heavily!

Dan: Karissa!

Dan started to cry!

Dan: Why?

Dan ran to Karissa holding her head!

Karissa: Dan…kill…Sephi…

Dan: Die Sephiroth!

Dan lets go of Karissa and draws his sword!

Dan: Cloud? Bebs?

Cloud: Alright!

Bebs: Ready when you are!

Dan: GO!

Bebs used her swinging smash limit!

Sephiroth: Tragic end!

Sephiroth grabbed Dan who started to wriggle but Bebs limit smacked Sephiroth with the sword through Dan!

Dan: Ah! Damn! DAMN YOU SEPHIROTH!

Cloud: Dan!

Dan: I, need, Life 2!

Dan falls to the floor!

Bebs: LIFE 2!

Dan returned to life!

Dan: thanks Bebs!

Cloud: Dan Bebs? Limit all together!

Dan: SOUL BLAZER!

Bebs: Swimming Smash!

Cloud: OMNISLASH!

All the attacks hit Sephiroth which kinda p***ed him off!

Sephiroth: I will be back!

Cloud: Shut up!

Dan ignored Sephiroth hugging Karissa!

Dan: Again, DAMN YOU SEPHIROTH!

Tears came out of his eyes! I smashed the cage helping Tifa!

Tifa: Thank you darlin'! What's with Dan?

Dan: (Sighs) We must get her back to life cuz a she's like one of my best friends and 2, her parents'll kill me!

Dan smash's Sephiroth's sword!

Dan: Sephiroth as long as I'm alive your just a myth!

Orange dust falls from the sky falling in Karissa's face!

Karissa: Wha…where am I?

Dan: Don't worry Karissa!

Karissa hugged Dan back!

Dan: Listen I'm sorry I let you die!

Karissa: hey I'm back so don't worry about it!

Bebs: We had better get moving!

Cloud was hugging Tifa!

Cloud: I'm so glad to see you!

Tifa: Same here!

Later, at the highwind

Tifa: You better go! So long.

Dan: Alright, take care guys!

Tifa hugs Dan!

Tifa: Thank you! Thank you for guiding Cloud!

Dan: Hey that's okay but more of the praise should be for Cloud! I nearly got you killed!

Matt: What about Nick, Alex and me?

Tifa hugs Nick, Alex and Matt!

Tifa: Thank you!

Alex, Nick and Matt: That's okay!

Barret: Later guys!

Dan: We'll be back!

Dan and co leap into the vortex!

Cloud: These kids are better than we thought!

Note: Dan, Karissa, Bebs, Nick, Alex and Matt will return!

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