THE ITALIAN WHO WENT TO MALTA

     (must be read with an italian accent, preferably out loud)

 One day ima gonna Malta to bigga hotel. Ina Morning I go down to eat
 breakfast. I tella waitress I wanna two pissis toast. She brings me only one
 piss. I tella her I want two piss. She say go to the toilet.I say you no
 understand . I wanna to piss onna my plate. She say you better not piss onna
 plate, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the lady and she call me sonna
 ma bitch.
 Later I go to eat at the bigga restaurant. The waitress brings me a spoon
 and knife but no fock. I tella her I wanna fock. She tell me everyone wanna
 fock. I tell her you no understand. I wanna fock on the table. She say you
 better not fock on the table, you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know
 the lady and she call me sonna ma bitch.
  So I go back to my room inna hotel and there is no shits onna my bed.Call
 the manager and tella him I wanna shit. He tell me to go to toilet. I say you
 no understand. I wanna shit on my bed. He say you better not shit onna bed,
 you sonna ma bitch. I don't even know the man and he call me sonna ma bitch.
  I go to the checkout and the man at the desk say: "Peace on you". I say
 piss on you too, you sonna ma bitch, I gonna back to Italy.

 

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