Jag – Officer’s Dispatch 13
Heroes: Jag, Zeke, Atobe Keigo, Dust, Pacci, Jean Reno and Balarai Snowe
Enemies: The House of Stormwind, Warlady Tallyn and Lady Draven
Recent Duties: You never thought that a law-abiding man like you would be the one behind bars and you’re certainly glad that your imprisonment is over. It was impossible to get any work done in those poor lighting conditions! You certainly hope you don’t find the same sort of disgraceful situation with the Stormwind folk up in the Aerie.
Troop Status
Supplies: Schmitzer SMGs, Armored Flak Vests, Deluxe Laywers’ suits, and briefcases full of legal documents.
Morale: Rumor has it that in your absence, Mattar has been plotting your legal downfall. He’s even made plans to change the unit’s name from the ‘Shark Pack’ to ‘Mattar’s Auto Injury Lawyers.’ Needless to say, he was bitterly disapointed by your safe return. His misfortune is your gain.
Health: The Shark Pack is in perfect health, however, they’re not so sure about those other troops they were stationed with. Apparently, that Mr. Smith character was quite liberal with his rum, and you’ve heard that stuff is bad for the liver. You need these guys watching your back, and you can’t afford to have them keeling over from excessive drinking!
Military Communiques
You’ve been given orders to march on the Spheran airbase at the foreboding Aerie. With any luck, you’ll even run into that smarmy Prince of Stormwind again. There’s not much that infuriates you more than a jail-break!
Personal Notes
McMason and Kufta have recently come to you with disturbing news. Apparently, while they were stationed out on the mountainside, there was significant talk of desertion amongst the Auxiliaries men. While you do plan to deport most of these foreigners anyway, military desertion is a serious crime, and you can’t afford to have them running off during this important mission.
Mini-Objective
Put a stop to the talk of desertion among the Auxiliaries troops.
Balarai Snowe – Officer’s Report 12
Recent Duties: Frankly, you’re rather surprised that your fellow Lieutenants actually managed to do something right in getting those gates open. Expecting them to get some Sugar Crisp cereal for your men was probably too much to ask.
Troop Status
Supplies: Heavy Field Mortars, 2 Remote Mines, Combat Daggers, Gortex winter parkas and snowshoes. Unfortunately, this inventory no longer includes a dunebuggy, due to it having been stolen by that traitorous Smithie.
Morale: You knew that it was a bad idea leaving your troops alone out in those mountains. Not only has their hot streak of morale cooled down, but once again you’ve been hearing mutterings of desertion. The fact that you’ve been assigned to what many of your men are referring to as “another suicide mission” isn’t helping either.
Health: A few of your men are suffering from hangovers due to excessive rum consumption. Fats, for his part, is complaining that Zeke’s second rate “White Lotus Lager” has been making him sick. After Smithie took off, they had to replace the rum somehow, after all.
Military Communiques
As you know, you’ve been ordered to capture the Spheran airbase located at the foreboding Aerie. Many of your men are not thrilled about this task, compared to the relative safety offered by Fort Romulus’ walls. You can't particularly say that you blame them, but of course you can't tell them that.
More importantly, you’ve also received orders from the Khan. He’s warned you that while marching to the Aerie, you may come across some ‘unidentified’ soldiers. You are to ensure that your column does not approach or interfere with these men in any way. While you’re certainly a little curious about this assignment, you don’t dare disobey a direct order of the Khan.
Personal Notes
Damn that Frost. From what you hear, he’s been talking desertion again with the boys. You’re not quite sure what’s gotten him kicked off on it this time, but you’ll definitely have to watch your back.
Mini-Objective
Ensure that no one interferes with the unidentified troops in the mountains.
Reclaim your stolen Dunebuggy.
Zeke – Officer’s Report 16
Recent Duties: Your troops have been wondering where you’ve been, and naturally, you had no choice to tell them that you were like Hitler in the bunker. Some of them have been speculating that perhaps you were in Mexico again as well. You’re fine with any of these rumors, so long as they don’t involve you sounding like a wimp in front of Desrae.
Troop Status
Supplies: Hacksaw Shotguns, Combat Helms, Steel Breastplates, Republic Sabres, brand new leather Wheel jackets, a shiny new motorbike, Zeke’s Tent of Horrors, and a barrel of genuine White Lotus Lager. Unfortunately, you haven’t had the time to brew another barrel for your micro-brewery business, but it seems like the stuff isn’t selling particularly fast anyway.
Morale: Leaving your men without supervision is never a good idea. Hermione has told you that some of them have started muttering about desertion behind the officers’ backs. You wouldn’t be surprised if that Jack Frost character from Snowe’s squad was in some way involved. Well either that or the taste of White Lotus Lager might have something to do with it...
Health: Spending a night on the mountainside was apparently a little chilly, but nothing your mens’ new insulated leather jackets couldn’t handle.
Military Communiques
As you know, you’ve been ordered to capture the Spheran airbase located at the foreboding Aerie. Many of your men are not thrilled about this task, compared to the relative safety offered by Fort Romulus’ walls. You yourself are a little suspicious, given how you were used to draw Spheran attention and fire in this last endeavour.
More importantly, you’ve also received orders from the Khan. He’s warned you that while marching to the Aerie, you may come across some ‘unidentified’ soldiers. You are to ensure that your column does not approach or interfere with these men in any way. You certainly don’t need to be told this twice; you wouldn’t dare disobey a direct order from the Khan!
Personal Notes
Yet again, you’ve been given the so-called ‘honour’ of another Special Assignment. The Special Forces anime brats seem quite thrilled, but you can’t say that you are. You're getting just a little bit tired of being put into suicidal situations by the top brass. But at least, you haven't been asked to sit inside a landed helicopter yet...
Mini-Objective
Ensure that no one interferes with the unidentified troops in the mountains.
Atobe Keigo – Officer’s Report 12
Recent Duties: As yesterday’s events proved, even a Spheran Warlord is no match for the Princess of Tennis. Kronos of Ursus has fallen, and you intend to see to it that the rest of the Spheran leaders follow shortly. After all, keeping an officer of your lineage in such dingy conditions is simply inexcusable.
Troop Status
Supplies: FLAME-THROWERS, Deluxe uniforms, kamikaze headbands, and several exploding “tennis balls.”
Morale: Your troops have been thrilled at your (only slightly exaggerated) stories of taking down Kronos, Lord of the Bears. However, you’re a little worried about having left them alone with that Smithie character – he’s a bad seed. You wouldn’t be surprised if he’d been giving rum even to your under-age troopers.
Health: After a night in the safety of the fort, your troops have mostly recovered from their previous chill. Stenda claims that her herbal teas are responsible but you of course remain rather sceptical.
Military Communiques
Commander Kilant must have great confidance in you to have given you yet another important assignment. You don’t intend to let him down.
Personal Notes
You’re quite excited about being given another special assignment by the Commander. You’re not so thrilled, however, about yet again being placed under the command of a foreigner! Yesterday, that impudent Khaurus Vanbaal tries to order you around, and today it’s Rodric again. You intend to show these grubby outlanders that Seigaku doesn’t need their help and is more than capable of handling the Spherans on their own.
Mini-Objective
Ensure that Seigaku defeats more enemy soldiers than Rodric’s Horde.
Kill Count:
Dust – Officer’s Report 11
Recent Duties: You have to admit, sniping down so many Spheran soldiers was probably almost worth the rather painful fall from that tower. Vanbaal sure knows how to pick a beautiful position. Being cramped in the close confines of that cell had caused you to build up more angst than you’d anticipated.
Troop Status
Supplies: SIR Rifles, Deluxe Scout Uniforms, PK-33 Handguns, Sniper Scopes, a Spheran ‘Highwind’ Light Infantry Rifle, and not nearly enough Sugar Crisp cereal (as in none).
Morale: The Boyos are in quite a state after spending the night with that Smithie character. Apparently, he kept poking them in the chest while they were sleeping and making loud shouts to try and scare them. And as you well know, it doesn’t usually take very much effort to scare a Denchulli.
Health: You’re still rather bruised from your fall off the tower, but your Boyos at least seem to be fine. And as long as you can keep your distance from any attackers, they should hopefully stay that way.
Military Communiques
While you’re not particularly thrilled about assaulting the Spheran position at the Aerie, at least this time the plan doesn’t seem to involve ramping into a fortified position on motorbikes. Plus, it’s a mountain assignment, so hopefully they’ll be plenty of high ground for you to get a clear shot at any enemies.
Personal Notes
So you’ve finally met the Special Forces sniper captain, Major Khaurus Vanbaal. Based on the way he was shooting, you privately have to admit that he really knows his stuff. You can’t help but find it ironic, though, that the only guy the Special Forces have going for them isn’t Electran either.
That encounter with Lady Sylgris’ drakkhaan was a little close for comfort. You have no problem taking any number of enemies from a distance, so long as they stay out of your face, and you strongly suspect that the Boyos (Dijon and Surge excluded) feel the same way. Just keep ‘em where you want ‘em, and you have no doubts that your expert sniping skills will take care of the enemy in no time.
Mini-Objective
Keep the Boyo Scouts at least 2 hexes away from enemy units at all times.
Pacci – Officer’s Report 7
Recent Duties: You don’t really understand the whole complicated plan that supposedly took place at that big Fort, but you do know that that evil Lord Kronos, Master of Time, had to be defeated. He was hoarding all the food for himself, and wouldn’t even share his delicious Sugar Crisp cereal! Food needs to be available to all, even if you can never get enough.
.
Troop Status
Supplies: PK-33 Handguns, SIR Rifles, Bright Yellow Deluxe Uniforms, and a fashionable European carry-all which is now filled with Sugar Crisp cereal which you took from Lord Kronos’ cache.
Morale: The Pac is very happy to see you again and have you back in command. This is in part due to your widespread popularity and incredible coolness, and in part due to Stone Cold Steve Austin’s rather abysmal leadership. While the Pac loves you as a leader, they’ve expressed that they wouldn’t mind having someone else to take things over when you’re not personally around.
Health: Fortunately, Steven didn’t manage to get too many of your men hurt in your absence, although he did almost crush your tent in his monster truck.
Military Communiques
As you know, you’ve received orders to march on the foreboding Aerie, headquarters of the Spheran aerial operations. Steven is already raving about crushing those puny planes with his truck, but somehow, this doesn’t sound like the most covert approach to you.
You’ve received some rather confusing missives from Conventionals High Command. From what you can gather, they actually seem a little upset about Kilant capturing that important fortress, though you can’t imagine why. You’ve even been given instructions to ‘take it easy’ in the upcoming march, but that doesn’t sound like a very nice thing to do to you.
Personal Notes
Although you can’t condoning hoarding food of any kind, you can see what Kronos liked about this Sugar Crisp stuff. You just can’t seem to get enough!
You wouldn’t want to speak ill of Steven, or anyone else for that matter, but you really could use another officer to look after the Pac while you’re occupied with other business. Steven has threatened to have them charge solo against the Spheran fortifications on multiple occasions, and you’d feel much more comfortable with another officer around to make sure that doesn’t happen.
Mini-Objective
Obtain an additional Platoon Sergeant for the Pac.
Jean Reno – Professional’s Report 1
Recent Duties: You have to say, Jean, that so far, you’ve only read the first line and you’re already not very impressed by these Electran reports you’re getting. They just don’t measure up to the French ones back home. But then, when you serve with the French Foreign Legion, ‘home’ is really a rather distant luxury. You’ve been stationed with the sizeable Auxiliaries contingent at the Republic Front Base for several weeks now, under the command of one Captain Dolg. Not only is he unprofessional and a drunk, but his wine is just no match for French wine either. However, yesterday’s battle to seize the key position of Fort Romulus was the first major action you’ve seen on the front lines. It seems, however, that it will not be the last, but you have the utmost confidence in seeing this conflict through to the end, no matter which name you may be going by at the time.
Troop Status
Supplies: RD-22 Rifles, Combat Daggers, and full supplies of ammunition and rations. Sadly, these rations are not in fact French, and the quality suffers as a result.
Morale: The Foreign Legion is in reasonably good spirits, having taken the fortress with only minimal casualties. With your professional leadership, you intend to see to it that this trend continues.
Health: Your troops are in acceptable health, although you wouldn’t be surprised if this sub-par Electran food made them sick any day now.
Military Communiques
Apparently, the crack shooting of your unit during the fort battle has attracted the attention of your superiors, and you’ve been given an important special assignment. As you know, you’ve been ordered to capture the Spheran airbase located at the foreboding Aerie. Some might think this mission sounds a little dangerous, but ridiculously dangerous stunts are par for the course where you’re concerned.
More importantly, you’ve also received orders from the Auxiliaries Supreme Commander, Genghis Khan. He’s warned you that while marching to the Aerie, you may come across some ‘unidentified’ soldiers. You are to ensure that your column does not approach or interfere with these men in any way. You certainly don’t need to be told this twice; you wouldn’t dare disobey a direct order from the Khan!
Personal Notes
You don’t know much about these men you’ve been assigned to work with, other than the fact that unlike you, they are not French. You’ll have to pay close attention to them in order to assess their professional abilities.
Mini-Objective
Ensure that no one interferes with the unidentified troops in the mountains, as per the Khan’s orders.
So, with Fort Romulus taken, the camera shifted to a scruffy older man attempting to drink a cup of coffee.
Jean Reno, Lieutenant of the French Foreign Legion, almost spit out the "horrible American coffee". Beside him was, Lt. Phil of The Parrot's Revenge, who thankfully no longer figures in this adventure summary.
Out from the basement came all the PCs save Dust, and they looked really banged up - save for Snowe, who only looked pretty banged up. Time, it seems, had taken its toll on the heroes.
At that moment, from the rubble of the tower came a Denchuli "oooooooo". As the rubble was cleared, Dust and Vanbaal emerged, both looking very badly injured. Vanbaal had taken a spear to the side from wifey (Sylgris), and while he attempted to shrug it off, he did admit that he was feeling it more than he'd otherwise like.
With the PCs gathered, the units began to trickle in to the Fort. Of note was the French Foreign Legion, led by a morbidly overweight dark-skinned man wearing a tacky orange sweater: Fat Albert. And once the units and their Sergeants hooked up with their Lieutenants, it was off to be healed somewhat.
From there, the PCs received orders: they were to report at once to Kilant. Making their way to the hastily set-up command tent, the PCs were told that another mission had been given to the seven of them. The Spherans, they were told, would not expect a strike on the Aerie air base deep within the mountains so quickly after the fall of Romulus. They were to go with Rodrick and his Berserkers, scale the mountain, and get to the Aerie. With the base disabled and the aircraft unable to respond to requests for air support, surely the Electrans would be at an advantage.
The PCs were dismissed by Kilant, and as they left, there was a lot of murmuring. Some, such as Zeke, felt that destroying helicopters was always a worthwhile proposition. Dust pointed out that if the helicopters were saved, he could rig up Zeke's motorcycle with a jet engine, something the foreign man almost seemed to find as appealing as destroying helicopers. Other Lieutenants were more concerned with being sent on another "important" mission so soon after the last "important" mission landed them in the dungeons of Romulus. But orders were orders, and after the night passed, the septet prepared their troops to go. A quick trip to Mahmood got Pacci a Sergeant almost as bright yellow as himself, though his poses weren't nearly as good: Bumblebee, a so-called "transformer" who actually seemed to be a really short guy who just wanted to help. One thing was for certain, though: he cost only half as much as Karl Marx, in whom none of the Lieutenants seemed to be interested. The "expected utility" of Bumblebee remained to be seen, though if Karl Marx were there, he would have pointed out that Utilitarianism does not do anything to deal with the alienation that workers feel from their labour, and thus is completely inferior to Communism.
Once everything was ready, the PCs left the base, and headed into the mountains. Rodrick led the way, and sent Dust and the Boyo Scouts out to check the terrain. After a while, a Boyo sneaked up to Dust to report that he saw something. Moving back with the man, Dust saw that in a canyon there seemed to be a number of armed men on horseback. Dust was confused; he didn't think the Electrans used horses, and he was almost certain the Spherans didn't. The only rational explanation, then, was that crack Denchuli cowboys had come to bail out the Electrans. Dust went back to Rodrick to report the sighting, but not his own theory.
Dust seemed to have come back at just the right time. It had been discovered that inside Pacci's European was in fact Sugar Crisp cereal, complete with milk! Zeke used his overpowering strength to grab it from Pacci, but managed only a few mouthfuls before Dust, unseen by the big man, stealthfully grabbed it from his hands. Dust himself only managed a spoonful or two before it was grabbed from him, too. One thing Zeke and Dust could agree on: those few mouthfuls just hadn't been enough.
Rodrick, outraged by this display of unprofessionalism, ordered the troops to fall into line. Privately, at least one person was thinking that Rodrick had never actually tried Sugar Crisp, but orders were orders. Dust reported the sighting to the group, which then debated about what to do. The general consensus was to not disturb anything, as this was supposed to be a quick commando-style raid on the Aerie. It was agreed that they would not follow the horse-riders, and would instead focus on getting to the Aerie.
After marching a short while longer, however, the group was confronted with the sight of an orange dune-buggy trying to make its way up the side of the mountain. Enraged, Ballarai Snowe seemed to know exactly who was driving it, and rushed down to meet it, followed close behind by Zeke, the Avalanche, and the Wheel.
Snowe's suspicion turned out to be correct: it was Smithy, the rather dishonest looking man they had met shortly before attacking the fortress. The buggy seemed to be loaded up with bottles of rum in the back, and Smithy looked more than a little surprised and disappointed to be apprehended. That was the attitude that lost him the dune buggy - Snowe took it back, loaded Kupp into the driver's seat, and everyone, including Smithy, continued up the mountain. It seemed that the man, despite stealing Snowe's beloved dune buggy, was all forgiven (after handing over all his rum as a 'peace-offering').
It was not long, however, before the group could see armed Spherans atop a nearby cliff, and was met by a woman dressed in a white feathery robe. She introduced herself as Tallyn of Stormwind, and offered them a deal: they would not harm the group in exchange for a white flag of surrender. Jean Reno pointed out that, being French, he had one should they decide to accept the terms. But before anyone could really think about it, Rodrick spat out that there would be no surrender, and that the Lieutenants should ready their men.
With that, the units readied for battle. The Avalanche took up position high atop a mountain, while the Boyo Scouts and the French Foreign Legion set up on the hillside. Stenda seemed to have Seigaku stretching, preparing for a sprint of some kind, and Rodrick, Zeke, Jag, and Pacci all set up their troops further away. Across a river made accessible by two fords were a number of Spheran troops: wind reavers, so-called "wing nuts" (Spheran wind knights), two units of light infantry, Tallyn's white-clad 'Guardian Angels,' and an unsettling sight of a group led by a leader carrying a radio. The Electran group knew too well what sorts of things those were used for.
With everything prepared, Seigaku broke into a sprint and made for the ford. Tallyn's men moved up, but were surprisingly broken on the first attack. This opened a window of opportunity that the Electrans were quick to take advantage of: the Foreign Legion and the Boyo Scouts opened fire with their SIRs, and Jag's Schmitzer SMGs spat out a volley of bullets. The Wheel, prepared to fire, had their shotguns jam. All told, Tallyn's men took quite a few casualities in the first round. But the Spherans were able to dish out the damage, too. The Thundercrackers brought out air strikes that devastated the Boyo Scouts and the Avalanche, and Rodrick and Zeke took a pounding from the blast grenades and martial arts of the wind reavers. In fact, the tide soon turned, with reinforcements arriving for the Spherans by way of Lady Draven, Spherans martial artists, and mountain rangers. The only option for the Electran military now was to make a break for the caverns in the side of the mountain, but this too proved to be difficult.
The Boyo Scouts, the French Foreign Legion, and Seigaku made it out through one of the caves. The Foreign Legion and the Boyos each had lost a few men, but Seigaku had been hit the hardest, losing ten otaku to rifle fire, and supreme psychic attacks. Seigaku threw a blast grenade and closed the passageway.
The other side of the clearing proved harder for those involved. Jag made it out almost immediately, and actually barely took a hit during combat. As a result, all four of his men survived, and with a +5 Veteran status, were clearly all senior partners in the law firm of Jag, Mattar, Koufta, Catalano, and Celino, Jr. Snowe, Zeke, Pacci, and Rodrick, though, had problems in the form of the Spheran reinforcements. Zeke couldn't seem to get away from the wind reavers, while Pacci, hat sideways and pistols cocked, couldn't seem to get away from Draven. Snowe, in the mean time, had most of the other reinforcements breathing down his neck. Eventually, though, they all escaped - all save Rodrick. Down the other passage rushed the Avalanche, the Pac, the Wheel, and the Shark Pack, with the passage being sealed off by a mortar from Fats Dynamo.
The adventure closed with the heroes shrouded in darkness, wondering where, if anywhere, the passageways would take them.
Lady Tallyn
Race: Spheran
Rank: Warlady
Affiliation: The Spheran Coalition - House of Stormwind
As leader of the Spheran House of Stormwind, Lady Tallyn's mere appearance all but commanded respect and reverence. Royal blue feathers added a splash of color woven into her long, shimmering white hair, and above her feathered Warlord's mask, her blue eyes shine like pools of infinite depth and purity. A golden halo rested atop her forehead, and when she walked, her feathered sandals seemed not to touch the ground. By all accounts, she is revered by her troops and respected by her enemies, a noble-lady who veritably deserves such a moniker.