Downtown

Heroes: Jag, Atobe Keigo, Dust, Pacci, Lord FLASH, and Balarai Snowe
Enemies: Unclear Instructions, Judge Joe Brown, Racist Doormen, Downtown traffic, and Soundwave


Jag – Officer’s Dispatch 17

Recent Duties: Now that you’re out of Verizon In-Network calling, you’ve been hoping you can actually buckle down to some real legal work. Unfortunately, distractions just seem to keep coming up which need to be dealt with as soon as possible.

Troop Status

Supplies: Schmitzer SMGs, Armored Flak Vests, Deluxe Laywers’ suits, Field Medkit, Healing Syringes and briefcases full of legal documents.

Morale: Mattar’s morale has recently taken a big hit, so much so that he might even be looking to sue you for injury. He hasn’t taken well to the addition of your college buddies to the Shark Pack. In fact, he claims it’s almost as if they’ve got no legal training whatsoever…

Health: None of your men have been getting much sleep lately, albeit for very different reasons. In fact, they’re so busy that with the war over, many of them are seriously starting to question the value of this military ‘training’ you keep making them do.

Military Communiques

There’s just no end to these formal ceremonies! Of course, as a man who appreciates proper procedure and protocol, you can hardly object, but it is cutting into your work. You are scheduled to be decorated today at a 15:00 ceremony at the Senate House, honouring the war heroes of the recent Spheran invasion. It’s only natural, of course, that you would be included on such a list.

The Senate is still trying to set a date for the Dragon’s execution. Apparently, this is considered quite a major event, and finding a time when everyone of importance can be in attendance is difficult. It seems, however, that there is still no talk of even trying to set up a proper trial.

The International Legal community continues to try to poke their noses into Electran affairs. Law Division has just received word that the planet of Deksiil is planning on sending over yet another man to ‘mediate’ on the aftermath of the recent war. Bahh, the last thing you need is another one of those bleeding heart hippies around!

Personal Notes

Last night, you got a phone call from none other than Judge Joe Brown, who was following up on that free lunch that you’d promised him at Seamus’ trial. He wants to get in touch again today to settle on a time and place. Frankly, you’ve had quite enough of these distractions, you need to deal with this matter as quickly as possible so you can get back to your work!

This morning, you saw a large shipping truck parked next to your sidehack in the civilian parking lot. You certainly hope whoever it is has a proper parking permit to be parked there!

Mini-Objective

Resolve the lunch you owe to Judge Joe Brown as quickly as possible.

 

Balarai Snowe – Officer’s Report 16

Recent Duties: You have to say that this whole promotion business has its ups and its downs. At least now, you can pull rank with more people should the need arise, but on the other hand, Captain Dolg seems to consider you his new ‘right-hand man.’ You wouldn’t have a problem with this actually, if only the Captain would be a little clearer with his instructions…

Troop Status

Supplies: Heavy Field Mortars, 2 Remote Mines, Gortex winter parkas and snowshoes, and a ‘dangerous’ dunebuggy which is hopefully the biggest danger you’ll have to deal with for a while now.

Morale: Like most Auxiliaries, your boys are in this whole stint for the money. And quite frankly, now that the war’s over, a lot of them don’t see the point of all this tiring ‘training’ they’ve had to go through. You tricked them last time with the party hats, but they’ve since started complaining more vocally.

Health: Once more, your men were up all night partying, ostensibly in celebration of your ‘promotion,’ though frankly you doubt they needed the excuse. Many of them seem to think they’ve also been ‘promoted’ by extension as a result.

Military Communiques

It seems there’s just no end to these boring ceremonies. You are scheduled to be decorated today at a 15:00 ceremony at the Senate House, honouring the war heroes of the recent Spheran invasion. You’re hoping there’ll be free apperatifs, that’s the only thing that might make attending actually worthwhile.

You have much bigger problems to worry about, however. This morning, you were following Dolg around as he talking about giving you some kind of assignment. Unfortunately, you didn’t realize you were supposed to follow him into the washroom while he was talking, and thus you have no idea what your assignment actually is! What’s more, after that exchange with him last night, you don’t dare admit to him that you missed hearing what he said. You’ve got to find some way to accomplish this mysterious assignment without letting on that you don’t know what it is.

Personal Notes

That ‘dangerous’ dunebuggy continues to give you trouble from time to time. Yesterday, the battery went dead, and you had to call in an electrician you know by the name of Slippery Pete to get it fixed. He’s a little on the shifty side, but he does have the lowest prices in town.

The National Games, the year’s biggest civilian sporting event, is scheduled to start in Electra City in the next couple of days. After your sporting success at the varsity games, Fats has been talking about entering a team. One drinking mug is good, but he’s got two hands, after all.

Mini-Objective

Find a way to accomplish your assignment without admitting you have no idea what it actually is.

 

Atobe Keigo – Officer’s Report 16

Recent Duties: Quite frankly, your recent duties have been exhausting – not in relation to the military, but to your tennis. Your new tennis coach has had you working on your game around the clock, and any request for a break has been met with extreme ridicule. Of course, you have yet to see this so-called ‘pro’ actually play a game himself…

Troop Status

Supplies: FLAME-THROWERS, Deluxe uniforms, kamikaze headbands, several exploding “tennis balls” and LUBOSH, your personal tennis trainer.

Morale: You don’t mind working on your tennis game, but you really wish that this Lubosh would lighten up on his ‘big baby’ comments. You’re afraid that your men will cease to respect you, or worse yet, respect that disgusting tennis star Anna Kournikova more than you.

Health: Your troops are excited over the upcoming National Games, the year’s biggest civilian sporting event, and have been training hard in hopes of attending. Of course, given who’s likely to be there, you suspect many of them may have ulterior motives for this sudden work ethic…

Military Communiques

There’s just no end to these ceremonies. This can only make you assume that people just can’t get enough of celebrating you. You are scheduled to be decorated today at a 15:00 ceremony at the Senate House, honouring the war heroes of the recent Spheran invasion. Your mother has already called you to say that she expects you to be in attendance. How she finds out about these things before you do is anyone’s guess.

Personal Notes

The National Games, Electra’s biggest civilian sporting event, is scheduled to take place in Electra City over the next couple of days. In the past, you had participated in these games as part of the Special Forces Academy team. In the past, the military has typically sent their own athletic team to these games, but due to the war, have not yet done so this year. You intend to see to it that this is changed, you don’t plan to miss out!

Due to both the upcoming games and the fact you’re in, you’ve been getting a lot of phone-calls lately from old athlete buddies looking for accomodations in the city. It’s been all you can do to help them get set up, what with all your tennis training and all.

Much to your dismay, the upcoming Games have also resulted in a massive media blitz of Anna Kournikova propaganda. Many are calling her Electra’s finest tennis player and female athlete, and most pundits expect her to take home the tennis championships at the games. What they don’t seem to be aware of is that YOU’re the Princess of Tennis, and you don’t intend to let some blonde hussy convince anyone otherwise.

Mini-Objective

Find and destroy as much Anna Kournikova paraphernelia as possible.

Dust – Officer’s Report 15

Recent Duties: Especially after events like yesterday’s promotion, you prefer to keep a low profile. As such, most of your time has been spent in the peace and quiet of the military library, voraciously reading A Richer Dust. Now that’s a quality novel if you’ve ever seen one!

Troop Status

Supplies: SIR Rifles, Camouflage Scout Uniforms, Sniper Scopes, a Spheran ‘Highwind’ Light Infantry Rifle, and several new kegs of Charlie Mops’ best hops, which you have just had imported to the base.

Morale: You figured that after such a rough time in the field, your Boyos deserved a good celebration. As a result, you’ve finally managed to restock your supply of Charlie Mops’ Irish beer.

Health: Your hardy Boyos are in good health, especially now that they’re safely in the city with minimal risk of dangerous snakes being around.

Military Communiques

These Electrans sure seem to love their formal ceremonies. You are scheduled to be decorated today at a 15:00 ceremony at the Senate House, honouring the war heroes of the recent Spheran invasion. You’re a little leery of appearing in front of the entire Senate, but hopefully brats like Keigo will try to steal the show and you can just kind of slip through unnoticed.

Personal Notes

You sure are glad to have received that shipment of Charlie Mops’ beer. It was brought in by an old buddy of yours, a Denchulli trucker named Slow-Moe. He’s just the best where truck-driving is concerned.

While reading the newspaper in the military library, you’ve come across several advertisements for a downtown pub and restaurant called Paddy Flaherty’s that purports to serve true, authentic Denchulli cuisine. Given the amount of racism you’ve found all over Electra, you find this claim highly questionable. An Electran wouldn’t know Denchulli cuisine if it hit them in the nose with a raw potato! In fact, you fully intend to head down there yourself when you get a chance and put this ad to the test with your discerning palate.

Mini-Objective

Dine at Paddy Flaherty’s Denchulli pub and restaurant to determine the authenticity of their supposed cuisine.

 

Pacci – Officer’s Report 11

Recent Duties: Pacci, you’re in – in with Verizon Wireless Network. Of course, some might say this hasn’t been a good thing for your military duties, given how much time you’ve been spending on the phone, but fortunately you haven’t been seeing much action lately anyway. Besides, it’s such a hip, cool thing to do, to walk around talking on a cell-phone all the time.

Troop Status

Supplies: PK-33 Handguns, SIR Rifles, Bright Yellow Deluxe Uniforms, and a fashionable European carry-all which now contains several Energeon Cubes, and a cell-phone which is in with Verizon Wireless Network.

Morale: The Pac is thrilled that you’re in with Verizon Wireless. Unfortunately, so is Steven, as he never fails to remind you whenever he speaks to you.

Health: The only health problem the Pac is having is that they’re constantly hungry. The servings at the OC Cafeteria just aren’t enough for their voracious appetites. You’ve had to bring in some extra pizza and the like to keep them satisfied.

Military Communiques

There’s just no end to these ceremonies you have to attend! You are scheduled to be decorated today at a 15:00 ceremony at the Senate House, honouring the war heroes of the recent Spheran invasion. You just hope that this event doesn’t cut too much into your Pac-man playing time.

Personal Notes

You’ve just found out something of critical importance. While you were downtown looking for food for your men, you came across the ‘Big P’ Pizzeria, a pizza place you used to frequent in your youth. Inside, they have an old Pac-man arcade machine where you found that, after all these years, you still have the top score (with the initials PAC)! You’re a certified Pac-man master, but you still remember the night you got that score. There was just the right amount of pizza grease on the joystick. What’s more, it seems that ‘Big P’ is going out of business, which means they might trash the machine! You cannot allow this to occur – you’ve got to get that machine out of there and preserve your record-breaking high score.

Now that you’re in, you’ve been getting a lot of phone-calls. In particular, you keep getting calls from these guys asking you to guess how many cookies they’ve got in their mouth. Of course, you can only approve of stuffing small, round objects in your mouth as much as possible.

You don’t notice much that doesn’t involve Pac-man, but you’ve heard that the National Games, a big sporting event, is supposed to take place in the next couple of days. You wonder whether there are competitions for Pac-man at the national level? Because if there were, you could surely win them.

Mini-Objective

Obtain the Pac-man machine from ‘Big P’ without losing your amazing high score.


Adventure Summary

  • Bam! The heroes enter the O.C. only to be greeted by Lord Flash. Dust stays for a moment, then leaves. The remaining PCs, except for Keigo, discuss the hotness that is the famous Electran tennis player, Anna Kournikova, and the upcoming national games, an event open to all members of the Electran public and military.
  • Dust, heading downtown, sees Jag on his motorcycle, and hitches a ride in the sidehack. Once downtown, the Denchuli tries to get into "Paddy Flaherty's Denchuli Pub" to test the authenticity of said public house. Thwarted by racist doormen who refer to him as a "drunk". Ends up paying them off only to try a mediocre thick potato-and-guiness stew (thereby inadvertantly violating his strict diet) and some sort of green porridge.
  • Meanwhile, Jag and Judge Joe Brown meet for lunch. Joe only orders soup, declaring it to be too light for lunch, which sets Jag off on the precise legal definition of "lunch", to which Joe Brown disagrees.
  • Pacci heads off to a closing-down pizza joint, and learns that a Pac-Man machine is for sale. He pays 20 marques, but realizes that unplugging the machine will cause his high scores (which are in the range of ten times higher than the nearest competitor) to be erased. He finds Dust, who refers him to an old trucker friend of his, Slow Moe.
  • Dust, disgusted at the incredibly sub-par (and alcoholic!) Denchuli cuisine, walks across the street, where Jag flags him down from inside a restaurant. Jag asks Dust whether soup would constitute lunch; Dust agrees, as he argues that his usual army meals have consisted of little more than crusts of bread, which are certainly less filling than soup. Joe Brown still disagrees. Dust refers them to the Denchuli pub as proof that soup can be lunch.
  • Jag takes Joe Brown to Paddy Flaherty's, where the thick potato soup fills up the judge, who makes the mistake of commenting on how full he now feels. Jag circles him, and gets him to admit that it was lunch.
  • Meanwhile, Keigo has been busy around the base destroying any reference to Anna Kournikova (who's actually pretty hot, for an Electran) that she can: Mahmood's swimsuit calendar, etc. Eventually goes back to Lubosh's Pro Shop, where she finds a life-sized cutout of Kournikova. Distracting Lubosh, she burns down the display (and most of the Pro Shop).
  • Pacci meets up with Slow Moe, but still needs someone to work the electricity so that the high scores are not erased. He finds all the electricians in the city booked for the day, but Snowe refers him to Slippery Pete. After Pete wires up the machine, and Pacci plays "Frogger" with the traffic, he gets the machine into Slow Moe's van, and takes it back to the base.
  • For the entire time, Snowe has been talking in generalities, asking Mahmood and Dolg about "the you-know-what", "it", and so forth. Mahmood doesn't have "it", so the Indian gives him a slip worth 250 marques, telling him it will be honoured anywhere in Electra city.
  • Snowe manages to find "it", a bottle of American Bourbon, in the same restaurant that Jag and Joe Brown were in. He takes it to the vacant lot, where the Mongol warriors take it from him, and tell him that it will be given to the Khan.
  • Keigo manages to change the channel of the lone TV at Paddy Flaherty's, ensuring that Anna Kournikova's visibility will be significantly reduced.
  • The PCs return from downtown to the military base. Training ensues, to various degrees of success. Lord Flash and Joy are both missing, for some reason.
  • The heroes arrive at the ceremony honouring them by the Senate. Lord Flash quite literally crashes the party. Having to impress Kilant, Bremingham and Lorinda/Loram, Jag ends up impressing the most with his Firm Handshake, with Pacci's Sparkling Spins and Keigo's Snarky Remarks coming next, and Dust's Embarassed Blushes and Snowe's Inappropriately Friendly Claps being the least effective.
  • Shortly after, the heroes are forced to come to the defense of the small village of Ohmsville, which has come under attack by pockets of unknown troops, led by the mysterious Soundwave and his Cassette tapes. With new special moves, the PCs are more than well-equipped, and deal with the enemies quickly and effectively.

Note: I wrote a longer summary, but Pinky ambushed it.


Major Characters this Session

Bremingham
Race: Electran
Rank: Senator
Affiliation: Republic of Electra Senate

Bremingham is a stalwart member of the "old guard" of the Electran Senate, and a blue-blooded aristocrat to the core. As an older, somewhat portly man, he has walrus mustaches and wears a uniform covered with military medals. In fact, Bremingham claims a good deal of military service to his name, and also serves as the Senate-Military liaison. He is also none other than the father of Special Forces officer Lt. Jenissa, and is known for his tendency to spoil his only little girl to bits and pieces.



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