Heroes: Jag, Kabuto, Pacci, Dust and Lord Flash
Enemies: Isabella "Ivy" Valentine, The Evil Baron Waldorf and Khaurus Vanbaal
Jag – Officer’s Dispatch 41
Recent Duties: This so-called “blar-nee” seems to be absolutely rampant in the culture of the Denchulli. Not that you didn't already know that, with your understanding of their culture. However, as an educated man, you believe only in cold hard fact, and political machinations. As such, you don't plan to let any superstitions stop you from uncovering the truth around here.
Troop Status
-Supplies: Schmitzer SMGs, Armored Flak Vests, Deluxe Laywers’ suits, space-titanium armored briefcases, and a fleet of jet-skis. Unfortunately, military grade supplies are not readily available in this peaceful farming community, and ammunition for your Electran-made weapons is not likely to last long.
Your Electran Weapons have only 8 uses remaining.
-Morale: Your men feel somewhat safer now that a proper constitution has been established, although some of them have approached you about suspicious irregularities in the trial of Captain Dust.
-Health: Your men have basically occupied Old Bailey's as their HQ. The familiar setting of a court-house is helping to alleviate their culture shock.
Military Communiques
-The full-blown operation to 'restore order' on Denchul has begun. According to Lanver, half of the key cities have already capitulated to the Electran forces. However, outrage remains in the rural areas, which on Denchul, represents the majority of the population. There have even been unsubstantiated reports of extreme brutality on the part of the Electrans, razing resisting villages and leaving no survivors, even among the non-combattants.
-As if Khaurus Vanbaal being in charge of the invasion force wasn't enough, you've heard that Ivy has been promoted to Captain and is part of the advance Electran forces. That sick woman deserves a jail-sentence, not a promotion!
Personal Notes
-You remain interested in all news of the mysterious Electran instigator, Baldwin. Lanver has told you that he recognizes the name, and the man was an Electran soldier in the days prior to the Strasveck rebellion, now turned mercenary. You don't know what his game is, but you intend to find out.
-Lucky Pierre would rather have it not be known that his 'lucky streak' was beaten, and gave you a lucky charm of your own as a 'gift' to ensure this. It consists of a cigarette lighter with an engraving of a four-leaf clover on it. Add this item to your item list.
-Vidal Sassoon must have been taking music lessons from his friend the Maestro. You've heard clarinet music coming from his tent during off-hours.
-Of course, in addition, Vidal keeps up with the fashion industry. While he is disdainful of country Denchulli fashion, he claims that fashion from some place called Scotland is rather trendy right now. Of course, this place is naturally in Europe, where all fashion originates.
-McMason is not impressed with the level of law enforcement around here. He says that the mayor of the nearby village of Killamey is a former police officer who seems to rely on super-heroes to get any work done. This could explain why law around here seems to be held in such low regard.
Mini-Objective
-Locate and track down the mercenary Baldwin.
Pacci – supreme Commander’s Report 34
Recent Duties: You cannot believe that the mighty and powerful Clovey the Clover had betrayed Pacci and joined forces with your evil nemesis, Dr. Wily. Such an offense made destroying his fortress almost justifiable, even with its delicious supply of Fortune Flakes. Of course, now that the real villain is defeated, you don't see what everyone else is so worried about. They should be celebrating that all the danger is over! Which is precisely what you intend to do.
Troop Status
-Supplies: PK-89 “Reaper” Handguns, Bright Yellow Deluxe Uniforms, Combat Helmets, Steel Breastplates, a Verizon wireless cell-phone, Protoman's Whistle and a sack of potatoes. Although your men are pleased by the abundance of food, military grade supplies are less plentiful.
Your Electran weapons have only 8 uses remaining.
-Morale: While the Pac is elated at your glorious defeat of the evil Dr. Wily, they are still suffering from the loss of their beloved Pacman machine. And apparently, entertainment that doesn't involve drinking or square-dancing is in short supply here on Denchul. You have to find another method to provide some entertainment to celebrate this victory.
-Health: As you yourself are well aware, Pacman withdrawal can be dangerous. Your men definitely need something to take their minds off of it. Of course, not thinking about Pacman is pretty much impossible for you.
Military Communiques
-Lanver has mentioned something about how the main Electran invasion force has arrived on the planet and is making swift progress. However, since he's not the Supreme Commander, you didn't have to listen too carefully to what he had to say on this matter. Besides, if you can beat Dr. Wily, you can handle anything.
Personal Notes
-You were racking your brains for a method to properly celebrate your historic victory, when you suddenly remembered one thing: you are wearing pants worthy of a Maestro. Clearly, this could easily make you into some kind of band conductor. If you could obtain a band as well, you could hold a great victory performance. Of course, two things are required for a band, and those are musical instruments and people to play those instruments. Unfortunately, you have neither at the moment, but you're sure there must be a way to get some.
-Local gossip suggests that the mayor of the nearby town Derry-on-River is a very educated man, which makes him something of a rarity in these parts, and only respects those of similar education. He's also said to have a rather ominous advisor of whom all the local Denchulli are scared silly. Of course, you're sure that defeating a scientist like Dr. Wily practically gives you a degree by osmosis.
-Some of your Pacmen have had trouble sleeping recently. They've been complaining about loud thrash music coming from Stone Cold Steve Austin's tent at all hours of the night. That Steven is certainly no end of trouble, in fact, you're not quite sure how you ended up bringing him along.
Mini-Objective
-Assemble a victory band to perform in honour of your recent amazing conquests.
Dust – Officer’s Report 36
Recent Duties: Now that you've dealt with your personal problems in your hometown, it's time to deal with the even greater problems facing all Denchulli. You've spent your recent time feeling out the readiness of the local Denchulli people, and their readiness to face the hardened Electran armies. It's really going to take everything Denchul has got to see it through this darkest hour, but you know your countrymen are up to the task.
Troop Status
-Supplies: X-3 Phantom Rifles, Camouflage Scout Uniforms, Sniper Scopes, Rifle Tripods, Climbing Spikes. Ammunition for your specialized Electran weapons is hard to come by, but fortunately given the lack of gun control, there's no shortage of good ol' Denchulli weapons around the farmsteads.
Your Electran weapons have only 8 uses remaining.
-Morale: Your men are rather unsettled by the defeat of a prominent Denchulli icon like Clovey the Clover. You may have to find another way to rally them and the rest of the Denchulli into action.
Denhculli Defenders!: So long as they fight on Denchulli soil, the Boyo Scouts gain +1 to all Attack and Defense rolls.
-Health: With the defeat of Clovey, your Boyos have become rather suspicious of their favorite breakfast, Fortune Flakes Cereal. This is unfortunate, as a good balanced breakfast is absolutely key to starting the day on the right foot.
Military Communiques
-The full-blown operation to 'restore order' on Denchul has begun. According to Lanver, half of the key cities have already capitulated to the Electran forces. However, outrage remains in the rural areas, which on Denchul, represents the majority of the population. There have even been unsubstantiated reports of extreme brutality on the part of the Electrans, razing resisting villages and leaving no survivors, even among the non-combattants.
-The invasion alone is bad enough, but it chills you to know that none other than Khaurus Vanbaal himself is in charge. The two of you have it coming, and regardless of the former's reputation, this is your country on the line, and you're the only one who can stop him. It's one sniper's war you don't intend to lose.
Surefire: Dust gains +20 to-hit with all Firearms attacks for the duration of this Adventure.
Personal Notes
-As always, the peaceful, generous people of Denchul would rather farm than fight. However, even they can be stirred into action at news of the Electrans' brutal treatment of other rural areas. If it means visiting every local leader and village yourself, you'll do whatever it takes to rally them into action.
-You didn't have much time to pack when you left your home on Denchul the last time, and your mother Miluda has returned to you some old possessions. These include your old Denchulli fiddle, the staple of all Denchulli music.
-Although generally a good man, there have long been rumors in the town of Valaria that Mayor Bennigan is something of a lush. He's often been note to state that if there wasn't so much 'competition' in the town already, he'd think about opening up his own Denchulli pub.
Mini-Objective
-Rally the people of the Denchulli valley!
Kabuto – Evangelist's Communion 2
Recent Duties: You are both pleased and blessed to have shown that Clovey the Clover for the charade he was and broken his evil control over the simple people of this valley. Of course, now that their pagan icon is gone, they will need somewhere else to turn to fill the void in their souls. Coincidentally, you are more than happy to provide just such a place.
Troop Status
-Supplies: Spheran Longblades, White steel breastplates, Steel combat helms, Holy Shields, candles and holy incense.
-Morale: Your shield-maidens' patience has been severely tried by the presence of the rowdy new 'converts' that came with that Zeke fellow, and with the Electran leader who seems to hit on them at every opportunity. Still, they are steadfast in their devotion to the Gods and your mission.
-Health: Your maidens have been working hard to convince others that the communion advocated by your church is not a time of excess, but their success has been marginal in this regard. Local customs often take much time to change and must be adapted to serve religious purposes.
Messages from God
-It doesn't take a message from the Gods to make you realize that this Lord Flash is not one of them. His claims to the contrary are both outrageous and blasphemous. His faith must be shown as the sham that it is in order to draw impressionable Denchulli converts to the true faith.
-You have been devout in your prayers and the Gods have answered. They have instilled upon you new powers to protect you from the Unfaithful, and you find yourself with a greater understanding of the mystic world.
Kabuto gains the ability to teach Enhanced Psychics to military troops.
-You have had a prophetic nightmare filled with pain and suffering, depicting the ashes of a burning village filled with screaming villagers set alight. It is as those a thousand voices shouted out as one in pain, and then were snuffed out. The Gods do not lie to the chosen such as you, and the heathen perpetrators of such deeds must be sought out and punished.
Personal Notes
-Now that you have dispensed with the local Denchulli superstitions, such as Clovey the Clover, it is time for the Denchulli people to enter into the loving (but stern and demanding!!) arms of your fold. Usually the best way to do this is to convert established local leadership and wait for the rest to follow, but you're willing to take anyone who will pledge themselves to your faith. Even these godless Electrans are welcome if they can be suitably converted.
-You have heard that the mayor of the northern village of Limerick is an extremely devout man. Of course, with the unmasking of Clovey the Clover, it's unclear exactly what he's devout to. You suspect you could provide an answer to that question however.
-In anticipation of your many soon-to-be converts, your troops have been hard at work constructing a church in the town of Valaria. You've already secured the help of Paddy Maguire in providing supplies for the communion, and you've had a great pipe organ carted all the way from Sphere for Sunday morning hymns. Some lawyers have been suspiciously asking if this latter item is in fact a baby grand piano, you're not quite sure why.
Mini-Objective
-Obtain as many converts as possible while denouncing the Church of Flash.
Lord Flash – Officer’s Report 17
Recent Duties: WAAAFF!! That Kilant certainly got what was coming to him, as far as you're concerned. He was giving you so much lip you felt it was your duty to give him some back – a big, fat one to be precise. Since then, you decided the airspace of Electra just wasn't big enough for you and you had to expand your influence to other venues. You've been spending the last couple days flying around and establishing your territory here on Denchul (which is of course everything). However, it could only be so long until your Electran followers got into trouble without you, so you've had to come back and show them a thing or two – namely, yourself.
Military Communiques
-Another bonus of coming to this world is that you won't have to listen to that fat chump Tubby anymore. Not that you ever really did so anyway.
Personal Notes
-You've been performing what they call reconnaissance while flying around, and have noticed some strange sights. In particular, you've seen black clouds of smoke rising from several outlying rural villages. By the time you arrived on the scene, everyone was either dead or gone (mostly dead), and the village a pile of ash. Some uneducated passer-bys have suggested that spontaneous human combustion, or perhaps flash-out, may have been responsible, but these ignoramuses clearly don't even know what flash-out is. As usual, it will probably be up to you to educate them.
-Another important reason for your scouting was to find yourself a home worthy of your greatness. You saw just such a place in the form of a grand castle that apparently is called Caer Ostreimburg. Not only is the castle itself very nice, but you hear they have a wonderful collection of tapestries. Unfortunately, some earl or baron or something already supposedly has claim to this property. They're about to find out that Lord Flash is the only real nobility around here. WAAFF!!
-Some people who aren't you seem to have made the mistake of assuming they're in command of the Electran expedition. Sadly for them, they're clearly mistaken. As if being YOU wasn't enough (which it is), you also still have a conductor's baton acquired from the Maestro, which clearly makes you into an authority figure in any context.
Mini-Objective
-Demonstrate a true flash-out by dousing your fist in gasoline, punching someone in the face and lighting them on fire.
-Claim the castle of Caer Ostreimburg as your own.
The morning after Wily's defeat, the officers gather in their makeshift camp for breakfast. The food seems to be pretty good, much better than the usual Electran fare. However, the breakfast is interrupted when Rodrick, cloaked in his wolf's skin, arrives at the scene. Asking who is in charge (and receiving responses from Kabuto, Pacci, and Lanver), Rodrick eventually offers the service of his former auxilliaries, telling them that Kilant had broken an agreement to allow Rodrick to have the Dragon of Sphere. Unable to draw on their metagaming knowledge, the group agrees, knowing that the number of troops they would be able to muster on Denchul might not be sufficient to stand up against a veteran and well-trained army.
Pacci talks to Jag, who tells him that Vidal Sassoon is in fact an accomplished clarinet player. Pacci calls Vidal, who seems delighted to join the festivities, especially when Pacci (as "Supreme Commander") promises him relief from field duties. Jag's metagaming sense is ringing, and he tries to call Sassoon, but the line is busy from Pacci's phone call.
Pacci then moves on to Kabuto, who has the use of a moveable pipe organ available. Pacci seems quite pleased, but is less than pleased at her demand that he convert, permanently, from the Church of Lord Flash. When he finally gets his religious sentence reduced to one day in the Catholic church, he agrees, and has Kobuto agree to play the organ as well.
Pacci then goes about the two pubs in Valaria, trying to recruit people in there. The only musician he finds is O'Hare, a hunter who has in his possession a french horn. When Pacci asks him if he's proficient with it, O'Hare replies that he knows a few notes. This is enough for Pacci, who now has a brass section. He also is able to get use of Maguire's facilities for the concert that night, provided that each musician buys at least one drink.
Pacci then realizes that he has Protoman's flute, and summons Protoman. Protoman seems relived that Pacci is not asking him about his incredibly-late hamburger, and agrees to play the flute during the concert that night.
The yellow-clad Electran then has some doubts: what if Dust is unable to play his fiddle well? Looking for Barney Stone, Pacci wanders into the sheep pen, yelling out, "SCOTLAND RULES!" Barney Stone, enrages, jumps up, yelling, "It does not!" Pacci then catches him, and promises to never try to catch him again so long as he shows up for the concert and agrees to play the fiddle. Barney agrees, and Pacci heads off.
Adding to both the variety and incongruity of his band, he also secures an electric guitar from Stone Cold Steve Austin. He doesn't even contemplate asking the latter to join the band, but instead offers it to Lanver, who doesn't need much convincing at all to 'jam' with the group.
He then realizes that he has a full musical group, but no music. Expecting that Jag's liberal arts education should be sufficient to score a major orchestral piece, Pacci approaches him and asks him for his help. Jag agrees, finding a dusty old text, and writes a huge piece with twelve french horn solos, that being in his reckoning, "the greatest instrument of all."
That evening, the concert goes off without a hitch, as Pacci conducts the group to success.
They meet with mixed success. A great number of the Denchulis are willing to convert to one church or another, but their willingness to fight is not so great. Dust has to set up a considerable bar-tab for Mayor Bennigan before he'll agree to give Valaria's support, though the mayor eventually does.
The others move on to the towns of Derry and elsewhere, enlisting both followers and new Irish Republicans. In Derry, they meet mayor Henry Caplan, an educated man and a physicist. He agrees to help out, since they (and in particular, Jag) know the value of an education. He and his ominous assistant, Darth Vector, who is also a master of physics, set about rallying the people of their small town.
Jag continues his search, looking for illegal weapons (mostly Schmitzer ammunition), as well as their source - the mercenary apparently called Baldwin. He searches a number of farmsteads, and is able to acquire enough ammunition to keep his Shark Pack happy - for a while. He eventually traces Baldwin's movements to Derry, where Mayor Caplan remembers meeting him, but was advised against any involvement by Darth Vector, who sensed a "tremor in the net-force." Several kids, however, were given dark pomegranates by the man, who they report headed south after his visit.
This time, looking much more the part, Flash has no trouble being admitted inside. But once inside, the butler becomes suspicious of Flash's heritage, informing him that if he is a Scottish baron, "then I am Mickey Mouse!" Flash's levelled response levels the butler.
Further down the hallway, Flash and Jag enter a room. Sitting there is the mysterious Baldwin, Evil Baron Waldorf, as well as Ivy of the Special Forces. Summoning an insurmountable amount of guards, as well as Khaurus Vanbaal, they capture Jag and Flash. Jag demands to know Baldwin's motives, but after some brief words with Vanbaal concerning his payment, the mercenary departs. When the two come to, they find themselves tied, back to back, in chairs. Ivy smirks over the two of them and says her goodbyes through some derogatory words to Jag and a sensuous kiss to Flash (since no woman can resist him!). The situation darkens when the Evil Baron Waldorf steps from the shadows and demonstrates how they say goodbye in his unit. Both Jag and Flash decide they liked Ivy's way better. With the villains walking off, the two need a plan. Deciding that the best course of action is clearly to burn the ropes, Flash whips out a lighter from Jag's pocket, but manages to burn himself, and drop the lighter. The lighter then catches the rug, then the curtains, and soon the whole room is in a blaze. Jag and Flash hop in the chair over to the fireplace, where they manage to get out of their bonds, and throw a lever. The fireplace spins around, and the two find themselves face to face with two figures: Ivy Valentine, and the Evil Baron Waldorf.
A short battle ensues, with Flash and Jag concentrating all their attention on Waldorf, who quickly falls, though not without a special 'goodbye punch' to Flash. Ivy, however, proves more resilient, liking the pain that the two of them inflict upon her. But even she cannot withstand Jag's reason or Flash's manliness, and she falls.
Meanwhile, the rest of the officers lead an assault on the castle, determined to free Jag and Flash. Fighting against the Ivy League, skirmishers, sharpshooters, and artillerists, the group manages to break into the castle and eliminate the Ivy League, "rescuing" Jag and Flash, both of whom consider the situation to be well under control.
But the efforts of the officers are needed elsewhere. Rodric arrives on the scene, offering to clean up the castle, while the heroes are called to a nearby town, where Vanbaal and his Bloody Ravens are laying waste to town and townsfolk. The group spread out, and are able to take Vanbaal with surprisingly few problems. There is at least one major casualty, however: Lanver, who had cut Vanbaal's unit down to almost half its original strength in a heroic one-man stand before their arrival, lies bloody and dying from gunshot wounds inflicted by Vanbaal and his snipers. But as Dust and Pacci are busily gathering up ammunition for their Electran-made weapons, a gunshot rings out, killing a Boyo Scout. Vanbaal has escaped.
Clustered together in the same area, Vanbaal finds all but Dust hiding in a forest, signing some sort of legal document for Jag, whom he badly wounds with the mark of the raven. From there, they spread out, hiding in different areas; even Lord Flash manages to remain hidden, despite his best intentions to be the centre of attention.
Eventually, after a long game of cat-and-mouse, they unmask Vanbaal's hiding spot. Throwing subtlety to the wind, all but Dust rush the Fenixan sniper, and brutally beat on him while he strafes them with his twin Reapers. Kabuto is the first to fall, hitting Vanbaal with a couple of psi-spears before she is taken out. Flash falls next, but not before beating down the Fenixan with two pistol-punches. Pacci, Jag, and Dust remain. After remaining silent for most of the combat, Dust fires a single precise shot at the sniper, who reels from the impact. Jag and Pacci finish the job, with the lawyer firing his Schmitzer, and Pacci attacking with his oversized shield. Vanbaal falls, but in a blaze of glory, refuses to go down, dealing out even more damage and bringing Pacci down to defeat.
Eventually, he is downed, the remaining officers able to defeat him. Grimacing, he smiles sickly at Dust, telling him that they are both only, "dogs of war," before Dust works the bolt of his rifle and fires one last shot into the Fenixan, extracting some measure of retribution for the scorched-earth warfare the man inflicted on the villages of Denchul.
Darth Vector
Race: ??
Rank: Mayoral Advisor and Master Physicist
Affiliation: Derry-on-River, Denchul
It should come as no surprise that the man called Darth Vector struck an imposing and unusual figure. Clad in a long black cloak with a helmeted mask covering his face, Vector was the advisor to Derry mayor and former physics professor Henry Caplan. He was also one of the few local leaders on Denchul versed in military matters, though how he obtained this expertise remains unclear. Needless to say, Darth Vector was a master of calculating the trajectories of his enemies and his own weapon, and could determine the proper vector of approach to any situation. The net-force was strong with this one.
Baldwin
Race: Electran
Rank: Mercenary
Affiliation: Unknown
The mercenary known as Baldwin remains largely a mystery. He is known to be the supplier of Electran-made arms in the Dublin Valley on Denchul, and for encouraging revolt and resistance against the authorities among the people. A blond-haired man dressed in tarnished dark armor and metal gauntlets, he could often be seen eating his favorite fruit, a dark bloody-red pomegranate. It was suspected that his offering of said fruit to those around him would bring them down to the depths of the netherworld - this prediciton would later prove to be eerily accurate.