Non Malaysian English, Part 2
Here are some signs and notices written in English that were
discovered throughout the world. I hope you enjoy them.
Do let me know you you do! Please feel free to forward it to anyone.
I am glad that I am a Malaysian who speaks Bahasa Inggeris (Malaysian English) :-)
In a Singapore port restaurant
Now serving live lobsters
At a number of Pakistan military bases
Restricted to unauthorized personnel.
In a New York medical building
Mental Health Prevention Center
In a Marina Square restaurant
Open seven days a week and weekends.
On the menu of a restaurant
Blackened bluefish
In a New Jersey restaurant
Open seven days a week and weekends.
On the walls of an estate
Trespassers will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law.
-- Head of Estate
On a long established New Mexico dry cleaning store
Thirty-eight years on the same spot.
In a drugstore
We dispense with accuracy.
On a New York convalescent home
For the sick and tired of the Episcopal church
In a funeral parlor
Ask about our layaway plan.
In a clothing store
Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks.
Outside a country shop
We buy junk and sell antiques.
In a Tacoma, Washington men's clothing store
15 men's wool suits - $100 - They won't last an hour!
In a Massachusetts parking area reserved for birdwatchers
Parking for birds only.
In the vestry of a New England church
Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is
extinguished
In a laundry room
Do not put wet clothes in dryers, as this can cause irreparable damage.
A sign seen on a restroom dryer at O'Hare Field in Chicago
Do not activate with wet hands.
In a New Hampshire jewelry store
Ears pierced while you wait.
Warning: I suggest you break for while before
mad-man disease strikes, stop laughing for at least 5 minutes before
you proceed further...
In a hotel restaurant
Customers who find our waitresses rude ought to see the manager.
A sign in an Asian seafood store in Manila
Crap - .79/lb.
In a Florida maternity ward
No children allowed.
In the offices of a loan company
Ask about our plans for owning your home.
On a display of 'You are my one and only' valentine cards
Now available in multi-packs
In the window of an Phuket general store
Why go elsewhere to be cheated, when you can come here?
In a Pennsylvania cemetary
Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own
graves.
On the grounds of a private school
No trespassing without permission.
In a library
Blotter paper will no longer be available until the public stops
taking it away.
On a Tennessee highway
Take notice: when this sign is under water, this road is impassable.
In front of a New Hampshire car wash
If you can't read this, it's time you wash your car.
On a poster on a telephone pole in Oregon
Are you an adult that cannot read? If so, we can help.
A sign on top of a drug store located across the street from
the Transbay bus terminal
Terminal Drugs
From the safety information card in an Airline seat pocket
If you are sitting in an exit row and can not read this card,
please tell a crew member.
On a delicatessen wall
Our best is none too good
On a roller caoster
Watchout for your head
On a Maine shop
Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and
workmanship.
In downtown Boston
Callahan Tunnel / No end.
A sign on a front yard
Inexpensive, Quality Daycare - Openings Day and Night.
Enjoy it ? Please let me know if you do :-)
You are welcome to email the author.
