Here are the complete lyrics to "Sailor's Paradise". With the usual apologies to Coolio, and a big high-five to Weird Al. Terri Hawkes even has a copy of this!

As I walk through the streets in the cool moonlight
I take a look at my life, and realise somethin's not right.
Cause I've been klutzin' and eatin' so long that
Even my kitty thinks that my mind is gone...

So I may shed a tear, that's how it's always been
They just treat me like a whiner, they're all so mean.
But you better watch who you hurt, oh yes you must
Or you and your Negascum are gonna be dust.

I really hate to trip, but my hair's so long
As I fall when I stall my head's ringing like a gong... fool.
I'm the kinda girl that little kiddies want to be like
Fighting evil in the night, winning love by the daylight.

They been spending most their lives, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.
Beat Beryl once or twice, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.
We keep spending most our lives, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.
I know Jedite's in thick ice, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.

I hate this situation, they got me facing
I can't be a normal teen, I was born into this scene
So I gotta be down with my Sailor crew
Have to save the world, no time to go and boo-hoo.

Not an educated girl, but destiny can be kind
Got a tiara in my hand and a gleam in my eye
I'm a klutzed out whiner, fear and tears still linger
But when my homies are down, you gonna rouse my anger... fool.

Death ain't somethin' that will ever go away
I'm living life do or die, to save the day.
I'm 14, will I live to see 15?
Of course I shall, Takeuchi is my pal.

Tell me whyyy are weee
So bliiiind to seee
Just whooo they arrrree
When they're innn civvieees?

They been spending most their lives, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.
The wiseman was not to bright, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.
We keep spending most our lives, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.
Reincarnation's mighty nice, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.

Power and the Prism
Crystal and the Power
Series after series
In our Eternal hour

Away I go a-running, but where I'm not quite looking
I dash into the kitchen, wanna know what's cooking.
They say I've got to learn what this cat is here to teach me
Good thing I understand her, she likes to preach me.
I guess she's right
I guess I'll fight
I guess they'll help.
That's why I know my friends and I will win... fool.

They been spending most their lives, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.
We all have to make things right, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.
We keep spending most or lives, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.
We can't win unless we fight, livin' in a Sailor's Paradise.

WAAAaaaaAAHHhhhhHHAAaiiiaaAHHhhhhHHHAAaaaaAAAIIiiiIIAaaaahhhh... (SLAP!)