Not That Sane. V Lakshman. Every Wednesday.

Forms for Rothschild (Feb. 18, 1998)

I was filling out a form recently to make known to a big corporation the extent of my financial empire. "Do you," I was asked, "own any of the following?". Underneath, the form writers had listed:
  1. Money Market Account
  2. CD
  3. Stocks/Bonds
  4. Investments
  5. Cash Management Account
which of course begs the question. Are these guys trying to tell us something? Are stocks, bonds and CDs not investments?

Smart aleck answers are tempting, especially with the market at these levels. I will be last one, though, to take the bait since my poor standing with Rothschild is poorer still -- the stock I panned at 46 is now at 55.

Still, CDs are supposedly insured by the Federal government. The only risk they carry is that the American system of government will be unable to keep its promise to bail out any FDIC-insured issuer of CDs. Maybe the form writers are in Yeltsin's camp and expect a world war to break out in the Arabian desert.

Perhaps there is a less (to me) chilling explanation. Even the normally sane Andrew Tobias is on board this train. He ran a set of views that essentially advised you to stick your money in a mattress because the whole banking system is to collapse in 2000.

Whatever it is that these form writers are subtly telling us -- whether of an approaching long-drawn war or of coming financial collapse, I wish they would whisper it in my ear. Everyone knows I'm no Rothschild.


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