President Boris Yeltsin called Clinton with an emergency:

"Our largest condom factory has exploded!" the Russian President cried.
"This is my people's favorite form of birth control! This is a true 
disaster! Our population will explode unless you help us!"

"Boris, the American people would be happy to do anything within their
power to help you," replied the President.

"I DO need your help," said Yeltsin, "could you possible send 1,000,000
condoms ASAP to tide us over?"

"Why, certainly! I'll get on it right away!" said Clinton.

"Oh, and one more small favor, please?" said Yeltsin.

"Yes?"

"Could the condoms be red in color and at least 10" long and 4" in
diameter?" said Yeltsin.

"No problem," replied the President. With that, Clinton hung up and
called the President of Trojan.

"I need a favor. You've got to make 1,000,000 condoms right away and
send them to Russia."

"Consider it done," said the President of Trojan.

"Great! Now listen, they have to be red in color, 10" long and 4"
wide."

"Easily done. Anything else?"

"Yeah," said the President, "Print, 'MADE IN  AMERICA, SIZE--SMALL'!"