The Path I chose

Title: The Path I chose Author: Elegant Genius Michiru Kaoih Disclaimer: The characters in this story do not belong to me, they are the property of Takeuchi Naoko and Toei animation. I have used them without permission, but I am not recieving any money for this story. Author's notes: after the story Feedback: send all comments to Michiru_Kaioh@alloymail.com. This is the first fanfic I've ever posted. I'd appreciate constructive critism, but telling me that you don't like my writing won't help anyone. Rating: PG for disturbing images The Path I Chose ************ Part one I walked through the hallways at school, feeling so alone. All around, I hear friends talking happily, people having fun. When I walk by them, they stop yelling and laughing, and start whispering. I don't really have any friends. I stare down at my feet as I walk, not wanting to meet anyone's eyes. One more class and this day is over, and I can go home and play my violin, and paint. What would I do with friends, anyway? I'm not like the other first- year students at my high school. When I'm not busy playing Violin concerts and showing my work in art galleries, I'm practicing, painting, or studying. I've always enjoyed being alone, ever since I was small. My parents are dead, there was a terrible accident when I was quite young. Ever since I can remember, I've lived with a kind aunt that offered to take me in. We live, just the two of us, in a large beautiful house by the sea. Even so, she's hardly ever home, and has become ill recently. I'm alone most of the time even at home. So why do I care? Being alone has never concerned me. And, it looks like I've been lost in thought for my entire literature class! It's a miracle that nobody noticed. At least now I can go home and practice for my concert tonight, and maybe work a little on my latest painting. ****** The seating area of the hall is full, as usual. It's about 5 minutes until my part of the show begins. I've done this too many times to be scared, but I'm still a little nervous. I'm getting well-known, and I know I'm a very good musician, especially because I'm only a high school student. People are expecting me to be perfect, what if I make mistakes? I'm also wondering about something else. Sometimes when I paint, I just let my mind wander, and I find that I've painted something. I did that this afternoon. I was thinking about this concert and an upcoming Math test, and I just started to paint without realizing. I looked at the canvas, and saw that I had painted a woman. She was tall, with short blond hair, and absolutely wonderful green eyes. But, the strange thing was, I've never seen her before in my life! I keep thinking that this must mean something, for why would I paint a picture of a woman I had never seen? I can't wonder any more about this, It's time for me to go on. I'm greeted with a torrent of applause. I bow and begin to play. I close my eyes, like I always do when I'm playing in front of an audience. All that I can see is the woman from my painting. I know it means something now, but what could be happening? ****** <The darkness is impossible to put into words. The entire earth has been covered in it, but for some reason I can still see. No one else can, they're stumbling around blindly, suffering. But the oddest thing of all is the silence. I can see the people, and I can feel that they're calling out for me, begging someone for help. but I can't hear a thing, there is no sound. Instead of hearing thousands of anguished pleas, I am feeling them. Experiencing the horror of thousands all by myself. I have no idea of what to do, or how to help. I scream, but even I cannot hear it. I am totally alone.> I wake up from my nightmare, sweating and shaking all over. My cheeks are wet with tears. What on Earth could this mean? I'm not usually one to analyze dreams, but this one couldn't possibly be insignificant, it was too horrible. I get out of bed and take out my violin, knowing I won't be able to go back to sleep. But I can't seem to remember any of the thousand melodies I know by heart. I go over to the music stand, pulling out some sheet music. It's no use. The notes just swim around the page. I simply pick up the instrument and begin to play. But the melody is dark and ominous, and just makes me even more scared. I'm the only one in the house, and there's no one that I can go to. I put the violin down and run outside, to the ocean, where I've always felt comfortable. I sit on a cliff and watch the waves crash against the rocks. Looking out at the water, I begin to cry. Everything seems so strange now, and I hardly ever cry. I've never felt more alone in my life. However, I've always liked to be alone, to keep to myself. I realize something. For the first time in my life, I'm lonely. ****** Part Two I still can't forget about that dream. I should be paying attention to my classes instead of thinking about it, but I just can't concentrate. This dream means something, I have never been more sure about anything in my life. It's clear that there is something that I must do, but what is it? And why me? " Michiru." "MICHIRU" I stopped thinking about my dream when I realized that my literature teacher had been trying to get my attention for a while, and was quite angry with me. "Yes, Professor?" I asked as calmly as possible, though I'm sure my cheeks were blushing a deep red. "Stop daydreaming and answer the Question, Kaioh." I hadn't even heard the question.<I am going to be in so much trouble>, I thought, <daydreaming through this class for two days in a row!> "I'm sorry, Professor, I didn't hear the question." "Well, I can't imagine why not", the professor told me sarcastically, "You haven't been paying attention for the last two days!" Just then, the bell rang. <Thank god>, I thought. <I had no idea how I would have gotten out of that one.> "I'm sorry, professor, I'll pay more attention tomorrow, I promise." I started to dash out the door. "Michiru, come back", called the professor. I braced myself for the lecture I thought was coming, and was surprised by what he told me. " Your concert last night was lovely. You work very hard, I know. So, if you ever don't have any work done, or need a day off, just let me know. You're an excellent student, one of our best. just don't try to do too much." I was so shocked by this that I couldn't speak. My proffessor was telling me that I could relax? I didn't speak, but managed to bow before I ran out the door. ****** My music has managed to relax me a little. I was worried that I would me so distracted that I couldn't play, but, thankfully, that isn't the case. I can't let some silly dream stop me from advancing my career as a musician. <but the dream sure didn't seem silly> I sighed, and put my violin away. I'd been practicing for over two hours, and I was starting to get sleepy. I decided to take a walk along the beach before I went to bed. I grabbed a coat, for the night had grown cold. ****** I've always felt a special connection to the ocean. I've never been able to explain it. Ever since I was young, I've loved to swim. I never feel frightened in the water, for I always have the feeling that it is protecting me. I know it seems silly, but there's no other way to describe it. The wind is always blowing at this beach, but somehow that's never concerned me either. Since I was a child I feel as if the wind and the ocean are looking out for me. It's too cold to swim tonight, but I take my shoes off and walk in the water. It's chilly, but I really don't mind. it takes my mind off of the things I've been thinking about recently. It's been over a week since I first had that horrible nightmare, and it keeps coming back. Except, each time, it's a little different, so I have something new to worry about. And always, the dream is Silent. it's not the comfortable silence that I sometimes enjoy, but a terrible one. And I'm always alone, The only one who can see through the darkness. Speaking of darkness, It's time for me to go home. I'm alone in the house, and I can't leave it unattended for very long. Before my aunt left, she said I could invite someone to stay with me. I guess she doesn't realize how much of a "loner" I am. I walk out of the water and start going home. ****** <The darkness is coming toward me, surrounding me. I run, but my legs don't seem to carry me anywhere. I scream, although I know that there is no one there to hear it, and nothing can be heard in this silence. A voice calls out to me, breaking the silence of the dream. "Neptune!", I hear an urgent voice call out. I realize that the voice is calling me. Someone grabs me, rescuing me from the darkness.> I wake up, shaking, like I've been doing for the past two weeks. It's amazing that I can function at all, waking up in the middle of the night all the time. For some reason I'm very cold, so I get up and step into a warm shower. The water is steaming hot, but it doesn't seem to erase the cold I feel. This dream was different from the last, because I wasn't alone. And who is Neptune? I was sure that the voice had been talking to me, but why would I be called Neptune? All I know is that I'm not alone anymore. And whoever this person is, I need to find them. but how? I don't need any of this. All I want to do is get through school, and have a career as an artist and musician. I never asked for any of this. My thoughts overwhelm me, and I begin to cry. ****** part 3 I've decided not to go to school today. It's one of the benefits of being on your own, you can decide when you need a break. Anyway, I need some time to think about what's been happening to me, and school is not the place to do that. <Who is Neptune?>, I wonder. <It seems like that voice was addressing me, but why would I be called Neptune?> I went to a closet and pulled out a pile of canvases. The same blond woman was on each one. I was certain that she had something to do with it. I looked longest at a painting I had done a few days ago. It was a huge canvas, but the painting was only of this woman's eyes. The eyes are beautiful, Green in color. They look angry, but underneath the anger, I can see extreme tenderness and caring in her eyes. Then, I look at a painting of her hands. They are graceful, like mine, musician's hands. I wonder if this is the voice who saved me in the dream, the person I feel I have to find. But I was so confused. I looked into the eyes on the canvas. <Who are you?> ****** Staying at home yesterday helped to clear my head. I made up a feeble "I was sick" excuse for my absence, which was accepted. Thank god, for it would be hard to explain the real reason I was out. I sit under a tree and start eating my lunch, some rice balls and a cookie from the batch I made yesterday. "Michiru?" I look up startled to see someone talking to me."Yes, what is it?" A girl comes over and sits next to me. "Hello, Michiru, my name is Elsa Gray. I've been wanting to talk to you for a while, but I haven't gotten the chance. I wanted to tell you that you are a really incredible artist!" I was surprised. "You know my work", I asked, happy that one of my classmates knew who I was. "Of course I do", she replied, you're very famous. Everyone was so excited when they heard there would be a famous artist at school!" I was confused. People were excited about me coming? Then why had they avoided me? Elsa chattered on, answering my question. "I first, I wasn't going to come talk to you. I didn't expect you to be nice, because you're famous, and I'm sure you have tons of friends already. Some of the kids said you were stuck-up, but I didn't believe them." So, people weren't avoiding me? I guess that, really, I had been avoiding them. Come to think of it, maybe I could have been a little friendlier. "So, Michiru, do you want to go?" Elsa asked. "I'm so sorry, Elsa, I must have been zoning out again", I replied. "In four days, there's an automobile race, and I was wondering if you'd like to go. Some of my friends will be there, and they want to meet you." "Of course I'll go!" I replied. "Great", said Elsa, "I'll see you then! I'm glad to meet you!", she yelled as she left. "Me too", I called back. <Was I really being a snob>, I thought to myself. <I thought the others were ignoring me!> ****** < I feel strong arms drag me away from the darkness, rescuing me. The silence has been broken, for I can hear this one voice. "Neptune", the voice says, "are you alright?" I look down at myself and see that I am wearing a fighting outfit, a sailor fuku. This surprises me. I still have no idea why I would be called "Neptune", or what this outfit means. "I'm fine, Uranus", I answer, though I have no idea who Uranus is, or, for that matter, who I am. "I'm glad, answers the voice, and the person kneels down to help me up. I look up at their face, into their eyes. The eyes that I've painted so many times.> "Uranus!", I cry out as I wake up. I run to the closet, once again pulling out the paintings. the woman in my dreams, my partner against the silence, was the same as the woman I've been painting. Those eyes were the same eyes that I'd looked into, the hands and arms the ones that had rescued me. Uranus and Neptune, the sister planets. These aren't dreams, these are visions. If I don't do something soon, I feel that these terrible events will happen, that silence and darkness will cover the Earth. It's not just me working to save the Earth, it's also my partner, Uranus. I need to find her, but how? ****** part 4 "Michiru Kaoih. You have work to do, an important mission." I looked up, straight into the eyes of... myself. Dressed in the sailor fuku of my dream, holding a strange looking wand. "Important mission? What do you mean?" I felt strange, asking questions of myself. "You are Sailor Neptune, of the Sailor Senshi, Michiru. It is time for you to awaken. It is your job, along with your partner, Sailor Uranus, to find the messiah that will save the world from the silence. You know what I'm talking about." "My visions", I said, "so they weren't just a dream?" "No, Michiru", Sailor Neptune answered, "It is your job to find the three talismans that will bring forth the sacred cup. If you don't find the talismans, everything you saw in your visions will happen." I saw images of the talismans then. A glittering gold sword, a beautiful mirror, and a deep red garnet orb. "You must find these talismans", Sailor Neptune told me, "they are sealed into the purest of hearts. Sacrifices will have to be made. But for now, your duty is to find Sailor Uranus. You cannot work without her." Sailor Neptune stood in front of me and touched my forehead. The sign of Neptune started glowing, and I felt strange power run through my body. She handed me a strangely shaped wand. "You'll know what to do", she told me, and dissapeared. And I was left alone, the henshin rod in my hand, the sign of Neptune still glowing faintly on my forehead. ****** Yes, I knew what to do, but that didn't mean that I wanted to do it. I threw the henshin rod in the closet, the one with pictures of the woman I now know as Sailor Uranus. I slam the door, and ran out onto the beach. I run out on the beach and down to the water. The beach is absolutely deserted, it streches for miles, and I can see no one. "I'm not Sailor Neptune!" I scream out to the empty ocean, "I'm Michiru Kaoih, artist and musician! My dream is to become a famous violinist! I can't do this, I can't!" I wasn't screaming anymore, but talking softly to myself as I cried. I willed the glowing sign of neptune to disappear, but it just grew brighter as I got more and more upset. <I can't do this>, I thought. <I'm not Sailor Neptune. I've just been having meaningless nightmares.> Suddenly, more visions started coming to me, while I was still awake, instead of masquerading as my dreams. < Children were running through the streets, away from the darkness, though their screams could not be heard. I could feel their pain, as they cried for their mothers, and fathers, and friends. the terror they all felt, being blind and deaf and alone. the darkness just grew, destroying all of the beautiful monuments and gardens of the city that were in it's path. it showed no sympathy for the children that were in it's way. I felt their last anguished screams as they were swallowed by the darkness.> ****** I now know that I have no choice. Sacrifices will have to be made, the first being the dreams of my future as a musician. I have no doubt that this is the first of many sacrifices I shall have to make. I went back to the house and grabbed the henshin rod. I didn't want to do this, but I knew that I had to. I didn't like the idea of saying goodbye to the only life that I have ever known. I looked at the henshin rod that I held in my hands, and closed my eyes. "Neptune Planet Power, Make-Up!" I yelled, and held the rod high in the air. I felt myself surrounded by energy. I opened my eyes, and found that I was dressed in the sailor fuku from my dream. I was still doubtful, and I knew that I didn't want to do any of this. but I had to. It's my duty as a sailor senshi. I need to find the talismans, and the Messiah, so that the children of the world will never feel the pain I felt in my visions. But first, I need to find my partner, Sailor Uranus. ****** Part 5 I, Michiru Kaioh, am Sailor Neptune. I don't like that fact, but I'm trying to accept it. I'm upset about having to put aside my own dreams, but I've had to, in order to concentrate on my task of finding Sailor Uranus. When I find her, I'll know. the only problem is, I don't know where to look. I decided to go with Elsa and her friends to the race. I've been thinking about too much recently, and I need a break. ****** We settled into our seats, the race was about to begin. Elsa's friends are very kind, and most of them knew about my artwork and my music. I gazed out at the track, when I saw a tall, slim figure running like the wind towards a waiting car. Something about the person looked familiar. "Elsa", I asked, "Who's that, running towards the car?" "That's Haruka Tenoh", Elsa answered. "She's the youngest racer in Japan. She'll win, she always does. She beats me every time in track, also.", Elsa said wistfully. I thought she sounded a bit jealous. Elsa was right. Haruka Tenoh seemed as if she could outrun the wind, win in any race she tried. I had never met her. Why did I feel this strange connection? As the cars passed the finish line, Haruka was far ahead of the other cars. As her car stopped, she got out and took off her helmet and looked up into the bleachers, waving. She looked at me. I knew those eyes. Haruka Tenoh was my partner, Sailor Uranus. She looked shocked when she looked at me, and she quickly looked away. <she knows>, I thought, <she's had the visions too>. And she was probably trying to run away just as hard as I was. "Elsa", I asked again, "Do you think that you could introduce me to Haruka Tenoh?" "Of course", Elsa replied. " Why? Are you going to paint her portrait or something?" "Yes", I answered quickly. It was as good of an excuse as any. Although I had already painted so many portraits of her. "Come with me to my track meet tomorrow", Elsa said, "You may meet her then. I have to race her, you know. She's very fast, but I don't plan on losing to anyone." She gave me a confident smile. I didn't say anything to her, but I knew that Elsa would not win tomorrow. Haruka was fast, as fast as the wind, for she was under the protection of the planet Uranus, and the soldier of wind. ****** Haruka won the race, not Elsa. It couldn't have happened any differently, I knew. The amzing thing was that Haruka had been holding back. She had beaten Elsa soundly, but had not humiliated her. I wondered, how fast could Haruka run if she had to? She seemed to be running from something. Perhaps she was running from her destiny, as was I. Elsa came up the steps to the bleachers, looking defeated, but not too sad. "I can't outrun the wind", she told me with a sad smile. "Come on, I'll introduce you to Haruka Tenoh". I followed Elsa down the steps, unsure of what I would say to Haruka. I was sure I would think of something. We walked down to where Haruka was standing. "Haruka?", Elsa asked, "I'd like you to meet a friend of mine, Michiru Kaioh. She's a brilliant painter." "I sense that you were holding back," I said before Haruka could fully see who I was. Haruka's eyes widened at the sight of me. Her eyes were so beautiful, just as they were in my visions and my paintings. Anger could be seen, but so could tenderness if you looked hard enough. But today, I saw a lot of fear in her eyes. "Can you hear the wind?", I asked her. "She was so scared. I knew from the way she was looking at me that she knew exactly what I was talking about. She tried to cover up her fear. "You're a strange girl. What do you want with me?", she asked. "I want to paint your portrait", I replied. "Pass", she said in a bored tone. "I'm not into that sort of thing." She walked away, leaving me standing there alone. Still, I was not dissapointed. I had found her, and she would come around eventually. I'm certain that she is trying to escape her destiny just as I would like to. ****** Part 6 I didn't have to wait long to see Haruka again. I was playing a concert on a cruise ship, and Haruka was there, watching. After the concert, I met Haruka when We were standing on the stairs. "You're very famous", I told her. "In our school there's a girl who wants to drive along the coast with you in your car." I didn't tell her that the girl I spoke of was myself. I waited for the reply I hoped she would give. She must have known that I was talking about myself. Haruka just looked at my painting that was hanging on the wall. It was the one painting from my visions that I had allowed to be displayed. The painting was frightning, a scene of the end of the world that I felt was going to happen. I couldn't imagine why anyone would want to display it. "How can a pretty girl like you who wouldn't hurt anyone imagine something like that", asked Haruka, guesturing towards the painting. "It's not my imagination", I told her angrily. "I can see it clearly, as can you". "I don't have time for this", she said. "I'm Haruka Tenoh, Japan's only junior racer! Whatever needs to be done, you can do it!" "I don't want to do it either! I want to be a violinist!" We looked at each other for an instant, and then Haruka ran up the stairs. I watched her run away, wondering if I should go after her. I decided to stay where I was. I couldn't force her to accept me, or our mission together. But I was troubled. As much as I knew that I needed Haruka to fight beside me as Sailor Uranus, I wanted even more for her to be happy. Even though I hardly knew her outside of the dreams we had both been having, I cared for her. And I didn't want her to choose my path and forget her Dream, as I, even with my brave words, had already abandoned mine. ****** I was walking by a garage the next day, and I heard Haruka's voice. I looked inside, and saw a monster attacking. Haruka was about to grab the henshin wand suspended in the air in front of her. "Don't! Don't grab that! If you do, you will never be able to return to a normal life!" But, even as I was warning her, begging her not to pick up the henshin rod and become Sailor Uranus, I knew what was going to happen. Haruka was going to accept her destiny, and accept me as her partner. Even she couldn't run away anymore. And I had to help her. I quickly transformed into Sailor Neptune, and started to attack. Just as I was about to use my "Deep Submerge" attack to finish off the monster, Haruka stopped me. "That monster was a person", she said, "You can't kill it!" "I have to", I replied sadly, "Or there will be more victims. I don't choose the methods. The monster recovered, and attacked Haruka. I quickly jumped in front of her, but I cut my hand and arm as we fell to the floor. I jumped up and attacked "Deep Submerge!" I yelled. Thankfully, the monster did not die, but turned back into it's human form. I was injured from my fall, and crumpled to the ground. Haruka ran to me, grabbing my uninjured hand. "I could have killed him", I told her. "it's not right, but I have to do it. I'm a senshi, I chose this path. "Why did you save me?", Haruka asked. "If you hurt your hands, you can't become a violinist." "I don't want you to be as unhappy as me. I care about you. I wanted to ride in your car with you just once. I just don't want you to follow the same path as I did. Still, I'm glad that you're the other senshi." Haruka looked at me for a moment, and then at the henshin rod lying on the ground. She smiled slightly, and picked it up. Then, she helped me up from the ground, and we walked away. That day, we both accepted our destiny. ****** That night, Haruka and I drove along the coast in her car. It was so peaceful, and we both were happier after we accepted our fate. "I'm glad I met you, Michiru", Haruka told me. "What?", I asked over the wind. Haruka just smiled at me. " I'm not going to let you go tonight", she said as we drove off. And she still hasn't. Since the day that Haruka and I accepted our destiny as Sailor Senshi, I've never felt lonely again. ************ and that's the end! :) (or more accurately, the beginning.) feedback is much appreciated! Michiru_Kaioh@alloymail.com Author's notes: I'd like to thank everyone that had encouragement for me while I was writing this: Particularly Hillary, Josh, Hailey, Jenn and Lita, and everyone else at "Sailor Eclipses Fanfic Club" And a special thanks to Hailey and Lita for posting this on their sites. Thanks a lot, guys! If anyone wishes to archive this story on their site, please do, just let me know where it is so I can come and visit. and now for the notes about the story: Part of this story takes place during episode 106, I've done my best to preserve the authenticity of these scenes. However, I've only seen that episode once, and i'm sure that I've messed up the dialouge. If I've made any huge errors, please let me know. I did not use any japanese terms in the story, except in describing the senshi, their outfits, and their henshin sticks. this is because, although written in English, this took place in japanese, and I'm trying to be consistant with that. This story has been revised, this is the revised version. If you read the first copy, I've just corrected some errors and aded a scene. Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoyed the story. I know I had a lot of fun writing it. ~Michiru "Heralded by a new age, Sailor Neptune, appearing gracefully"

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