Today on Springer: Strange Jobs
Jerry: Welcome to the show folks! Today we look at strange jobs. Please welcome in the Sailor Senshi!
*All the inner senshi come in and sit down*
Jerry: Welcome to the show, ladies. Now tell me, what are your jobs?
All senshi: We fight wrongs and triumph over evil!
Jerry: Okay..... So basically you ladies are like police officers?
Jupiter: How dare you compare us to them?! Do they have the power to do stuff like this? SUPREME THUNDER!!!!
*Lightning fries Jerry*
Jerry: Okay, maybe you're superheroes. Now please welcome Seiya, Taiki and Yaten
*The guys come out and sit*
Jerry: Now what do you guys do for a living?
Seiya: We're singers in Japan. We're very popular there
Jerry: Oh really? Can you sing something for us?
*They sing Nagareboshi e*
Jerry: Are you guys related to Hanson or something?
Taiki: Why you?!
*The two other Lights restrain Taiki*
Jerry: I guess I shouldn't have said that..... Moving on, I hear you guys have other forms. Can you show us those?
*The Lights transform*
Jerry: Now before you tell us your jobs, let's take a poll to see what people think you do as a job in this form
*Poll takes place, Jerry gets the results*
Jerry: Well, let me ask you ladies first, what is your job now?
Yaten: We're super heroes
Random guy in the audience: Damn! I thought they were hookers!
Taiki: Why you?! STAR GENTLE UTERUS!!!!!
*The guy fries*
Jerry: Can someone get the paramedics here please? Alright, let's bring out Luna now
*Luna comes out and hops onto a chair*
Jerry: Uh.....what do you do? Is this a joke? I mean, it's a cat!
Luna: I'm a personal consultant. And this is no joke
Jerry: Do you have a license to do that?
Luna: Of course. I have doctrates in everything except art. I studied with Dr. Joyce Brothers for many years. And let me tell you, she never gave me catnip. The animal rights people should get on her big time
Jerry: This can't get any weirder, a cat..... I need to get more sleep. Let's bring out Tuxedo Kamen
*Tux comes out and sits down*
Jerry: What is your job?
Tux: I'm a bodyguard
Jerry: Ahhh....finally a normal job. So what kind of weapons do you use?
Tux: Mostly red roses
Jerry: Okaaayyy and it works?
Tux: Sure, roses are scary ya know. Wanna see?
Jerry:Why not?
*He hold up a rose*
Guy in the audience: Oh my God, it's a rose! Run everyone while you still can!!!!
*Everyone clears out of the entire set*
Tux: See?
Jerry: You jerk!!! You scared off my audience! My ratings will go down now!
*Tux and Jerry start fighting*
Jerry (from the floor, screaming in pain): Catch us next time from the hospital!
After the show.....