Regrets

By Akuma- chan

So this is what it feels like to die. I always wondered, but somehow, I guess I never thought it'd ever actually happen. After surviving everything the Dynasty threw at me, falling prey to a stupid drunk driver--it seems so meaningless, somehow.

I guess I must be in the hospital by now. I think they've stopped moving me, anyway. They shouldn't worry. I'm not going to make it. Somehow . . . you just know.

It's true; your life really does flash before your eyes. So you can regret all the things you've done--or haven't done. Like letting Dad go off without saying 'goodbye' because I was upset he wouldn't take me with him. I was only six, though. I couldn't have known what would happen. Could I?

I hope Ulley will take good care of White Blaze for me. I never did get around to telling him how White Blaze met up with me. Something else to regret.

Funny. There are so many things I regret . . . so few I don't regret. I don't regret becoming a Ronin Warrior; it gave my life meaning. For a little while, anyway. I'm just sorry this is going to cause the guys so much pain.

My friends. You've always been there for me. I haven't been the greatest leader in the world . . . always jumping in without a plan, always getting hurt . . . I wouldn't trade any of it away, if it meant losing a single moment of knowing you guys . . . and Miya.

Miya. Oh, Miya, the one thing I regret most in the world is not telling you how I feel about you. Ever since the moment I saw you, you've meant everything to me. I never let the guys know, but it was thinking about you that made me keep fighting even when things looked their darkest. Thinking about how much you'd be hurt if I let the evil win . . .

How could I have been so stupid! I should've told you . . . I had plenty of opportunities. I thought I had an entire lifetime. Now I know--life can be pretty damned short.

"Ryo! Ryo, you can't go! Please, don't leave us!"

Cye. I'm so sorry, Cye. You, most of all, have always been there for me. No matter what we went through, you were always right there, smiling and joking as if there wasn't a thing to worry about. You were never the strongest fighter, but if it weren't for you, I think the Ronin Warriors would have lost.

"Ryo! Dude, you got to fight! Come on, Ryo, you've got to pull through!"

Sorry, Kento. I wish I could, my friend. As strong as you are, as little as you think, your heart has supported us all. I know you're weak without your friends, but you'll have to learn to be strong without me.

"Ryo, please . . . "

"Ryo, if you can here me, please, don't give up!"

Sage, Rowen. The pair of you are so much alike sometimes, it's almost like you're twins. You care so deeply, but you're so quiet about it. You may use different covers--flirting, studying--but I've known the truth for a long time now. This may be hurting you even more than the others. Even more than me.

"Ryo, you promised you'd come to my birthday party!"

I'm so sorry, Ulley. I know I promised, and it's not fair to do this to you, but I don't think I have any choice. God, it's torture, knowing I'll never see any of you again!

"Ryo, please, please don't die!"

Miya. I knew you'd be here. Somehow, I don't think I could die if you weren't with me. I'd just be caught in between until you came. I have to stay, I have one more thing I have to do
. . . "Miya . . . "

Miya felt hope rising in her heart as Ryo pried his blue eyes open. He whispered her name.

"Ryo? Ryo . . . you're going to be . . . okay."

"Miya . . . "

His eyes rolled back, and alarms went off as his heart stopped, his lungs, and all other bodily functions. He whispered one last phrase before he died.

" . . . I love you . . . "

"Ryo!" Miya screamed and threw herself across his chest. It took the combined efforts of Kento and Sage to pry her loose, and she collapsed weakly on Cye's chest, great, wracking sobs shuddering through her frame. "Ryo, no!"

The doctor turned to them, her eyes sad. "I'm sorry. He's dead."


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