Not a happyfic.
TERMINUS
by Scott K Jamison
(Ranma 1/2 and its associated characters created by Rumiko Takahashi, no
infringement is intended.)
"It seems that this time I have gone too far in emulating my
mother."
My husband smiles at my feeble joke and squeezes my hand gently.
His fingers move down my body, not as a lover's this time, but as
a doctor's. He presses certain points with professional skill. They
will dull the pain for a while, without making me incoherent like the
drugs.
They will also use up most of my remaining energy, but it is a
small price to pay. The oncologist gave me at most two, perhaps three
days to live and most of that on life support. We decided, *I* decided, to
come home to die.
He mutters an apology, sad because he can do little more for me,
but traditional medicine is no better against some things than the latest
Western methods. I tell him it is enough and ask him to help me sit up.
There has been remarkable progress; already I have lived a year longer
than my mother did from when she was diagnosed.
He goes to the door. The first to enter are our children.
Fuuichi, our son, stands bravely, trying not to cry. I let him
know that it is okay to weep.
"You have been strong for others, Mother. Let me be strong for
you now." A good son, soon to become a man, a gentle man like his
father.
My daughter is a different case. Dandy hurls wrathful
accusations at me and beats the mattress with her tiny fists. How did
Tofu and I ever produce such an angry, uncontrollable child? Akane is
forced to come in and remove her. Strange, she seems to know how to calm
Dandy where all my methods failed.
Father is next. He looks so old now, his hair gone all white,
and his hands trembling. He weeps as he has not done in years. Who will
take care of him when I am gone?
Then Nabiki. She has not brought her latest lover with her.
Just as well. She tells me of her business, and in a whisper, that she
loves me.
Akane comes back, with Ranma and their children. They are
quarreling again, apparently Ranma almost failed to return from his
latest quest for some sort of miracle cure. Doesn't she see that he was
doing it as much for her as for me? Perhaps we shouldn't have pressured
them into marrying so young, before they'd resolved their differences.
But they were so much in love, and somehow I knew my time was short.
Roles become reversed, as Dandy plays peacemaker between them.
Perhaps there is something of me in her after all.
We chat for a bit, Ranma apologizes for failing me. I remind him
that failure is no shame if one has done one's best.
Ranma's mother enters, her face a mask. I pity Nodoka in a way.
Her husband and his master redeemed themselves in thwarting Cologne's
last mad scheme, but deep down even she would have preferred a
dishonorable husband to a dead one. She says a few words of
encouragement and leaves a bit of embroidery.
Sasuke is next, having to stand on a chair so I can see him. He
tells a few funny stories about his work, and presents me with a dusk-red
rose his wife bred.
Akane stiffens when Ukyou comes in. They never have quite
forgiven each other. The okonomiyaki vendor has brought me a new
headscarf. I began collecting them when the chemotherapy made my hair
fall out. Ukyou glances at Ranma, as if to remind him she's still
available. He pulls Akane closer to him.
Others are talked about who couldn't make it for one reason or
another. Ryouga happily married now, Shampoo not. I remember eggs for some
reason, and try to rise to make dinner. But my body can no longer respond.
Instead, neighbors appear, bearing gifts of food. So many
friends! I know one or two of them have had their eyes on my husband for
a while, but there is no point in being jealous now. There is much
feasting, and I take a little nourishment.
No time for jealousy, but a little for regrets. "Just a little
more time...I could have made it all come out right."
"You did your best, Kasumi," says Ranma, suddenly attentive.
"Isn't that what you told me? You've already done so much, for all of
us. I didn't understand at the time, you were always so quiet in the
background, but you were the strength in the house. You took care of
everyone, even strangers and enemies. If not everyone was better for it,
at least you did no harm."
Others speak up, Akane, Father, my husband. Sasuke credits me
with helping him realize he was a real human being, as if he hadn't known
it before. Even Dandy tells me I've helped her. I hope she finds
someone to cool her anger...
One or two at a time, the visitors leave, and the house grows
quiet. At last I am alone with my husband again.
"The children are safe." he tells me. "I will not leave you
before the end."
"I love you, Tofu."
"I love you, Kasumi. Rest now."
We sit together in silence. The world outside grows dark, and
then the world inside.
I lie in darkness for what seems a long time, then there is
light.
"Well done, thou good and faithful servant."
Who said that?
Oh.
Oh, my...
THE END
SKJAM!
"`Terminus': border stone"
Dedicated to Mildred Coral Jamison, 1908-1997, beloved
grandmother.
comments to majks@cyberx.com
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