://archieve
july twenty four
Genuinely nice people aren`t trusted anymore. It`s always assumed that they have some kind of ulterior motives. It`s sad that no one can be nice for the sake of being nice anymore. But I still believe that deep down inside people are fundamentally good.
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Never have I imagine to meet a star that would shed light on this darken path
june 20
This is where I let my naked emotions run wild. I let my fingers do the roaming and ink it on these pages. Been my sense of security through triumph & catastrophe.
april 23||grim discovery
It`s hard to swallow the truth...especially seven years after his death.
march3rd||figment of the imagination
My mind is buried with a thousand thoughts. Each one keeps me up at night. Some are so bloodcurdling, that even at time I`m afraid to close my eyes. I have a childish fear of the dark. I can`t sleep in complete darkness. I see things that aren`t really there. My imagination manufacture the likes of boogey-monster and the grim riper. More often of a little unknown girl, who either is hack or strangle to death. (My great aunt believes that a little girl was brutally murdered in my bath tub some 20 years ago and continues to "haunt" my apt for her unsolve death) There even been period when I would hallucinate. I don`t recognize the voice, but each word verbalizes directly toward me. They`re abusive. But last night, it was so intense. I putted on my headphones and blasted the music on high, in hopes of annihilating the voice. But its vocal was too overpowering. I bang my head on the wall a few times. Shaking it so violently. Silent. There was silent. A second later, the voice drills itself back into my mentality. This time, it was a cry for help. It was her. How can I forget? It was this time last year that the sicken "vision" came to me. I was never inform of the exact date of her death, nor any update on her children well being and the murder charges against their father. Eventually my cries rocked me to sleep. I hope in her next life, that she will be united with happiness. For I know she longed for that in the previous one.
february25
february19||happy birthday homie!
melted ice cream cake....yummmy blow out the candles ol` man five years& i`ll do it all over again because you define the essence of a real friend....... atomic tangerine canvass&lit inspiration; shattered dreams over hot herbal green tea;late nights rampage at dominion;& sweets stash in between; headaches at the alley (no more gutter balls!); darn coffee stains!; cluttered consciousnesses; secondary dialect; classic wu xia pian voiceovers; early morning skating;afternoon anime; insomnia& oversea gangsta series+birthdays strip club (was it ever dirrrty!.but let`s do it again); ms.chiquita!;chasing river currents; bled chaos @ heathrow to link wires;cases of the exs...& still the sequel continues; sushi, sashimi and more sushi...m!m!m! strawberrychocolate cheesecake&gourmet lunches; ill fated cross country roadtrip attempt (lmao. one day. one day though);... but HK here we come! your broken cantonese, combine with my three words of mandarin& a pocket dictionary- we`ll survive! (plus english is universal)
february14
I watched a man cry as he gracefully sung a lullaby for his sweetheart in mother tongue he spoke calling upon the wind to craddle the memories of their love to the heaven aboves I watched a man cry as he kissed the floor the floor that housed his young bride`s last breath This man turned to me and said a year and some odd months ago I watched a beautiful woman as she wept future dreams and scared vows destroy all by her man`s sinful impurities a year and some odd months ago I watched a beautiful woman as she wept & I understand those tears` of her
february11||running on E.. ..........mm ..............................pty
february10
If people would simply talk to one another and not cut off communication when problems arsie, it would save the world a lot of aggravation. february1 I`m always finding myself at the crossroads of what if`s and could have`s. I don`t know why I flood my mind with nonsense. Had one of those does this bottle of heineken owns my happiness? weekend.
january24||adding to the list....
I want to take more road trips and discover new grounds paragliding in the azores well screamin` at the top of my lungs take funny pictures along the way I want to laugh until I cry Come home once again to a house fill with laughter and love instead of four walls and silly furnitures .....I want to smile without having reason too.....
2005 Resolutions
- form even better relationships with my closest friends and family members - try snowboarding & - remove myself from situations that are "poisonous"