"Je me Souviens"
("I remember")
By Yui Miyamoto

Outside of my window and into the forest, there are voices. I hear people talking but I don’t know what to do. It is dead quiet from the neighbors around me.

And in the slightest whisper, I hear people talking.

Ever since I was little, I hear these voices. When I told my mother, she said to just ignore them because the whole city knows about that and so they ignore it because the many times we have checked it out, nothing is ever found.

This is with the exception of a man named Jacob. He sits outside his home on a bench. His family takes care of him and he’s harmless, but all the people don’t believe his story.

Only me. I sit next to him often. His eyes looked spaced out. It isn’t that he’s crazy, but he looks twenty-five for a seventy-two-year-old.

My mother thought my friendship with him was strange and my father forbade it. I didn’t listen to them and somehow, his family was able to convince them that our friendship was okay. He, at least, will have someone to talk to. Besides, he was harmless and wouldn’t hurt anything.

When I was eight, he held my hand. "Your hand is as soft as hers."

"Like the angel you saw in the forest?"

"Yes." He sighed. "She was awesome. I couldn’t take my eyes off her."

"Just go along with it, okay, dear?" his daughter told me as she went through the front door.

"I am not crazy!" He looked at his clothes and looked into a mirror. "I just don’t age!"

"How do you stay looking young?"

"I touched her. I placed my hand on a sash she dropped while running away from me. It changed into a dove in my hands, but I felt a change in me. It was wonderful. She is magnificent."

I didn’t understand until I went into the forest when I was ten-years-old.

I couldn’t stand it anymore. I wanted to see what he saw. Of course I was, I was a kid!

So, at around eleven at night, I jumped out of my window in overalls, sneakers, and a little snack for myself in my pocket. I walked into the dark woods guided by what I could hear. The voices got louder as I came closer.

"You shouldn’t be this way. It’s been too long," I heard a male say.

When I hid behind the bushes where the voices were, they stopped. I peeked out and saw a dove and another bird on the ground near the large pond.

They cowered away from me. The dove flew away in the opposite direction away from the large lake. The other one just looked back at me. Both of them would not touch or look at the lake.

I sat down on the ground and ate my crackers. "I thought I heard people. See, the city was scared for nothing."

I talked to that brown bird which seemed to be a sparrow. "Probably my mind thinks I heard people."

That’s when I began to cough. The coughs were so hard that when I glanced at my palms, there were splatters of blood. I looked at them in horror. "What do I do? I need my mommy."

The bird came closer to me.

I smiled as I thudded to the ground. My hand reached for the little bird. "Help me, please. Somebody."

My vision faded as I saw a hand reach out to me.

I felt water touch my lips and I opened my eyes to [see] someone looking at me. "Help me, please. Somebody," I said, helplessly.

"I am here, honey," my mom replied.

My blurry eyes made out her figure. "I’m home?"

"Of course, you are here. Where else would you be?" She replaced the cloth on my head with another one.

"I was dying in the forest. I spit up blood."

"You were dreaming. Look at this pillow case. It’s filled with blood spots."

I turned my hands in front of me. I know I left yesterday.

"But I’m a bit upset with you."

"Why, mom?"

"You were so lazy to change that you went right to bed with your overalls. You shouldn’t be lazy to do that. Plus, it will make your bed filthy."

I sat up and tugged on my overalls.

There was a whistle. I looked at the window to see the brown bird watching me.

Every day after that, that bird came to my windowsill as soon as I woke up. It came rain or shine and I got used to it being there.

Again, at seventeen, I went to the forest to see if I really did go there. Mr. Jacob thinks I have because of the look in my eyes. "There is hidden knowledge," he said.

As always, there were voices, I followed them until I sat in back of bushes as they spoke.

A woman gently scolded, "You’re showing too much of yourself."

"She wouldn’t know."

"Don’t make the same mistake I did and I’ve paid dearly for it."

"You’re torturing yourself."

"Because until now, he is considered an outcast for my mistake."

[They] stopped talking. I heard the woman crying. "I’ll see you later."

She went away. The guy stood there sighing. "I know this is harmless."

I got up and I heard him walk away also. I threaded through the patches of greenery and found myself near the same large lake.

As I walked closer to it, the voice of the male called out, "Don’t go there."

I turned around. "Who are you? Why can’t I go near it?"

At that moment, I grabbed my chest and began breathing heavily. "Whoever you are...Please...Help me."

"I’m coming, Selena," I heard him say as I saw him running towards me.

He then carried me.

"How...do you..know..my name?" I embraced him with my eyes fluttering.

"Drink this." He handed me water from the pond. "You will become better. Definitely. Water of life."

I looked into his eyes as I drank. Such rich light brown eyes. "Thank you."

I gave him a weak smile. "How did you know my name?"

He just smiled.

"You’re as beautiful as a woman."

"Thank you." He then asked, "Tell me. What is your one wish?"

I began to laugh and cough at the same time. "What are you? A genie?"

"Tell me."

"I don’t know."

He hugged me. "Why don’t you know?"

Somehow, I felt comfortable with him and no fear seized me to start running away. "I’ve never wished for anything more because I’ve got everything I’ve ever needed."

He looked at me for a half a minute. "Remember me. Please wish to remember me. I know it’s selfish, but please promise me before I never see you again."

"Why? Why can’t you?" A deep pain ached within me suddenly. I somehow wanted to remember this man.

Then, he embraced me tightly. "I’ve waited for this moment for an eternity."

He sighed and stared at me with gentle, loving eyes. "Goodbye, Selena."

With that, he backed away from me. I tried to walk to catch up with him.

"You’ll never see me again because this isn’t my true form. We’re not supposed to show our human forms. But instead of keeping that forever, I gave it up for my one wish: To be with you for a little while so that I could see and feel you."

He turned back into that little sparrow and flew over the lake. It enveloped him and showed his human form as he disappeared. The water returned back to normal.

"It was too short," I comment in a whisper.

Suddenly, I found myself in my room. My mother commented, "What was too short? You barely sat up in your bed."

"I don’t know why I said that."

She gave me a weird look and left to go to the kitchen. "Hurry up for breakfast."

I closed my eyes. Two raindrops fell. "Why am I crying?"

The brown bird was at my windowsill again looking at me. From out of the blue, my heart was sad. I reached for it and it came to my lap.

I began crying for nothing at all. The tears fell continuously. But for some strange reason, I knew there was something I had to remember and it included this cute sparrow in front of me.

Owari/The end.
Typed and proofread on mon. 7/26/99

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