Foreword: Just a few comments to make before you continue . . . 1) First of all, Mughi lays no claim (quite willingly, I would believe!) to any of the characters of Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon. All other characters belong to themselves (- or I would so hope, for they are quite real!). The storyline and ideas are Mughi’s. 2) Any comments regarding this fanfiction can be sent to Mughi through me at ladysilverstar@geocities.com. 3) Mughi doesn’t mind if you choose to take this fanfic for posting up at your own site. All she asks is that no changes be made to it and that her (pen)name stays with the fanfic. 4) A final comment to add – there may be scenes or details which seem a little unlikely (disregarding the fact that this is a fanfiction). However, I will say that, excluding the involvement of Haruka and Michiru, and events concerning them, Mughi has based this fanfic heavily on real life and has made this fanfic as real and as likely as it probably ever gets for a fanfic. With that said, enjoy your read. - Deanna ----------------------------------------------------------- Fanfic from a non-fan Mughi ****early September. A Saturday noon. I went into my room and dropped a stack of copious papers onto the unoccupied desk. So _this_ was going to be college life. My roommate had gotten in last week with the other foreign students and had taken the more choice side of the room. What this meant, practically, was that I was stuck with my desk under a bunk bed and less space than most submariners. Well, if my roommate needed space, that was her prerogative. Space was not one of Mughi’s needs. Music was. The first thing to be set up was the stereo. I started unpacking my single box. While putting away stuff away, I wondered what my roommate was going to be like. She was from Hong Kong, by the name of Diana Fang. White Fang! Not that I’d tease her about names. I was thoroughly sick of my own name, hence the handle ‘Mughi’. I’d picked it up for one of my favorite animation characters; a large ball of red-brown fur of very mellow and occasionally lazy demeanor. The series it comes from is pretty pitiful, but the character matches me pretty well. "Hello!" That would be her. I turned around. About 5’ 6", black hair, Chinese descent (duh), in white running shorts and a turquoise T-shirt. Two elder women were behind her, presumably relatives. We went about exchanging greetings as I unpacked. All was well. Eventually the relatives left. "So you like Japanese animation?" She inquired as I took out my Newtype magazines. I gave my least evil grin, "Mildly put, yes." "Then you know about Sailor Moon?" I dropped my magazines in their carton with a thud. I cringed internally, but remained tactful with effort. "I know of it..." Mentally- this is a weekly cartoon made for pre-adolescent Japanese gromits. Gromit is my word for child and may give you a hint of how much I like kids. Sailor Moon is renowned in the anime world, and not in the most flattering fashion. In my mind, it’s about half way between Dragonball Z and Voltron. For the uneducated of you, that’s like the level of snail-trail. I proceeded to find out that my roommate for the coming year had a rather nasty obsession for Sailor Moon. Not that character, actually, but Uranus and Neptune, who she considered the ‘perfect couple’. My thoughts; great, she idolizes lesbians in _extremely_ short skirts. Oh, well. I pride myself on tolerance. ***** As time went on I had let slip about my feelings for Sailor Moon, and to my vast relief, Deanna (not Diana) didn’t really care. I helped her get some Sailor Moon posters and such and kept my snide comments minimal. A bit about me; I am a romantic pessimist and an idealistic cynic. Basically I think anything is possible and that if it’s good, it won’t happen to me. I’m weird in that I’m a freshmen here entering into fourth year Japanese... Yes, I did a bunch of college language classes as a high school student. Now you know my secret; I have no life. None. I work, I eat, I sleep. The heaviest emphasis is on the last there- I can snooze any time or place except airplanes. Anyhow, for those of you who don’t know, being in fourth year French in college means you are fluent, but being in fourth year Japanese means you can baby-talk through a conversation and maybe read at the third grade level. Still, this level allows me to translate just about any Sailor Moon stuff for my roommate (what did I tell you about the target age group?). So I was educated in Sailor Moon trivia. My conclusion? I’ll stick with Lodoss and Miyu, thank you. I like plot. I like art. I like good music. I like less revealing costumes. Anyhow, it just so happened that second semester of my freshman year there were a couple of foreign students going into the international dorm. They were coming from Japan in what would be the first part of their second year, and as I am a part of the Japanese department (a small and elite body of students renowned for insanity), not to mention as a person who knows how to get help on translation homework, I went to meet them. Besides, I was trying to learn how not to be shy... hah. Evidently the two knew each other and were helping each other unpack. First impression: they must have both been from Harajuku[1] . One had dyed her hair in green and the other had bleached hers. Short and bleached I can handle- it’s common enough in the Asian population here, and the green didn’t seem odd on the other. Besides, she was in every other way a well dressed conservative Japanese Miss and the bleached wore traditional college fare- plaid flannel over T-shirt, jeans. Some odd recollection knocked around in my head, and I chose to ignore it. Probably myself trying to make an excuse to chicken out and come back later. [1-Harajuku is a part of Tokyo where about 50% of the population on the street has died hair- it is truly a sight to behold. I’m ignoring clothing-type style... which runs equally bizarre.] "Hi! You’re new here?" I found that I had to step forward to catch a paint case that had slid from what the green haired one was carrying. "Yes. Thank you..." It came out San-kyuu. The bleached hair girl was in the room as well. The two had gotten a two-room double that some juniors had moved out of to do their study abroad. I gave a bow-nod, one of my idiosyncrasies, and set down the paints next to the violin case on the bed. "Welcome. My name is Mughi, I’m a freshman here- the Japanese department wanted me to drop in and give an official hello. Anything I can help you with?" The two looked at each other. Bleach-girl answered me, sorta, "My name is Ten’ou Haruka and she is Kaioh Michiru. We are second year students." "I am sorry, our English is yet not good." Michiru looked a bit embarrassed. "That’s why you’re here. Just try and you’ll get it eventually." Japanese students are renowned for thinking their English is bad when they are actually totally understandable. The taller of the two, actually quite tall for a female Japanese, had less of an accent. Haruka had turned away to dump her armload of books on the bed. "Michiru tetsudate kure[2] " She started to sort out them out. Michiru brushed back her green tresses. "Chotto matte-ne.[3] " She turned to me. [2-Michiru- give me a hand. (familiar command form)] [3-Just a moment, OK? (familiar)] "Mughi? Do you know... where is the place to get our legistlation[4] ?" [4-In Japanese, there is no difference between 'L' and 'R' sounds. In fact, some elder Japanese cannot even hear the difference..] I did a quick translation. "Ah, registration is later, not open yet. Rachel- she’s just down the hall- Rachel will come by later to bring you there." Michiru looked grateful as I made my exit. My nervousness caught up with me and I leaned for a moment against the wall to regain my nerve. I hate people interactions... Hadn’t I heard those names before? It didn’t dawn on me until I got back to my and Deanna’s room and looked at her SM poster. Oh, great, a couple of SM freaks. And they even dye their hair to look like them- not that any mortal can be built like an anime character, what with leg-torso ratios, not to mention that little eye trick. Still, now I had to be tactful to another set of people. I snarled at myself and smiled at my roommate, who was browsing SM web pages and playing the Sailor Neptune MIDI on repeat. I would have to introduce her to some _real_ anime some day. ********* "Anta, kanjita[5] ?" Haruka asked as she closed the door(for readers’ sake, the rest will be translated). [5-Did you feel it? (familiar... a bit short)] "Something odd about that one. Maybe just culture shock, you think?" Michiru was putting away sheafs of music in the inadequate bookshelf the college provided. As soon as the Mughi girl had gone, they had rearranged the rooms to have one as a study room and the other a joint bedroom. "Maybe. It’s so weird having to look up at everyone." Haruka grumbled. She was tall enough in Japan to look straight in the eye of just about anyone, if not down on them. But then Mughi was a good couple of cm taller than her. "Well, get used to it. We’ll be here a while." Michiru sighed. Homesickness was expectable, especially with the jet lag kicking in and messing with her emotions. Haruka came up behind her, arms around her waist. "Don’t worry about it." She nuzzled Michiru’s hair, then let her go to finish unpacking. ************** "And this is where you will be forced to eat." I was introducing the two to our various dining halls. Luckily, they were right across the way from Frank Hall, the only producer of honestly edible food on a regular basis. Why? Because you could get cereal 3 meals a day if you had to. Believe me, this is a Good Thing. "You give the lady at the desk your ID, she puts it through the machine and she gives it back," I informed them unnecessarily. The tall one, Haruka, gave a roll of her eyes to Michiru. I was less than thrilled with her thoroughly American lack of basic manners. I directed them to the food lines and informed them about the joys of cereal. After a glance at the line, I decided salad looked good in comparison. I waited for the two to finished getting through the line to guide them to a table. I went to sit with Vinny and Shimona, two other exchange students I knew. Vinny is an Indonesian girl and Shimona is from the Arab Emirates. Fluent English from day one, so I had trouble thinking of them as foreign except for Shimona’s cute British accent. We made introductions to the two and sat down. "Wow, so you transferred in?" Vinny asked, munching at something gray and unidentifiable that had been on the lunch line. "Yes... I was Tokyo Daigaku and Haruka was Sophia." Michiru was moving the food around on her plate daintily. Haruka just wolfed the stuff down. I sat back, jealously thinking about Asian metabolism... "Tokyo Daigaku? Good credentials" I was impressed. That’s *the* best university in Japan. Period. Kids kill to get in there. Sophia is the international university, also in Toyko, which I’ve visited briefly. That would explain Haruka’s better command of spoken English. Michiru blushed. I guess she had assumed we wouldn’t know. Shimona went off on a tangent about some cute guy she had just met, leaving me out of the conversation. I tried a few conversation starters to no success with the two Japanese girls before giving up and getting some frozen yogurt. That’s the other redeeming factor about the dining hall. "When the semester starts up, the ‘borg (that’s the foreign dorm) dinner will have at least rice every day." I said, by way of reassuring the slightly unsettled looking Michiru. I wonder what her real name is, before her obsession with SM. She didn’t look very relieved by me. "What kind of classes do you have this semester?" Shimona asked, having exhausted her talk of her latest crush’s random good points. "Japanese Politics, Japanese Women Writers in translation, Japanese Reading- that’s the language course-, and Intro to Sculpture to keep me sane." I list them off. “Unfortunately, it looks like I’m going to die of homework- two writing intensives and a speaking intensive. All but one upper division." I ticked off my fingers, "And 3 PE’s." "Mughi- you are crazy." It wasn’t meant to be malicious. "Just get a life and _pretend_ to be a freshman." Shimona looked to Haruka. "You?" "English Writing, Visual Arts of Theater, Calculus, Chemistry." She said, finishing off her food and looking to me. "You know some Japanese?" I shrugged, "Not enough to understand anything significant." It was half modesty.... I could understand significant things... if I had a dictionary and enough time... and everyone spoke in reasonably polite terms. "Anyhow- Vis Arts of Theater shouldn’t be too hard- not much homework and no tests. Just a matter of showing up and doing one presentation." I had taken the class last semester to fulfill a General Ed requirement. "I have English Writing, History of Western Civilization, Physics of Music, and Statistics." Michiru volunteered. No music class? Then why tote the violin all this way? Ah well- each unto their own. The conversation wound down and I left the two to their own devices. ******** "Fire at will!" My instructor’s voice rung out. I was auditing archery- I had taken it my first semester and was already in 2 PE courses this semester, so taking it for credit had not been an option (just the Pomona credit system). I was in Karate and Aikido on alternating days, but archery was so fine to calm the nerves... The prior experience meant that I whupped most of the newbies. Not that I was bad anyhow, I thought with some pride. "Os." I looked up after my last shot. Haruka was walking toward the line with archery equipment in hand. "Retrieve!" The instructor indicated it was safe. Haruka hammered her ground quiver next to where I was standing. I have a real quiver, the only one in the class- I used to shoot at home. I went out and pulled my arrows. The next round Haruka whipped me, to put it mildly. "Retrieve!" "You’ve done this before, haven’t you." I admired her handiwork as we pulled our arrows. "It was required in high school." She shrugged. My competitive instincts kicked in the next round. Not that they helped my aim. One of Haruka’s early shots went high and she cursed beside me. Her other four arrows followed quickly in disarray. She finished long before me but I had scored higher. This pattern continued; until one went wrong, she was fine, but then her concentration was shot and so was her aim. As we put away our equipment, me quickly unstringing my bow manually while Haruka waited for a bow-stringer. "You’d do better if you didn’t let the bad shots get to you..." I stopped at her acid glance. All further conversation was stemmed. ******* "Yatta[6] !" I was in my room playing Sailor Moon Fighters, the street fighter game with SM characters that I had found for my roommate on the web. She always played Neptune and I took particular joy in playing Uranus just because it was so annoying to her to see the two beating each other up. "They’re just practicing!" was her rationalization. She’s better at it than I am, but I don’t play it to win- just for enjoyment at teasing her. I know I shouldn’t tease so much.... but it’s so much fun! [6-I did it! (colloquial expression)] The cause for my remark was the fact that I had won a bout for the first time. "What?" My roommate knows no Japanese. "Oh, nothing." I turned away from the screen of Uranus rejoicing over Neptune’s beaten, crying form. I gave Deanna an evil grin. She began protesting that it was ‘just practice’. I tuned out. And turned to see a chagrined Michiru in the doorway. We keep our door open whenever we’re in. "Mughi... I want to ask..." Her eyes roamed over my roommate’s posters, cards, and other Sailor paraphernalia. My side of the room had nothing but my own drawings. Deanna had absorbed herself in combat against ChibiMoon. She looked up briefly, took a moments pause on the green hair, seemed to think of a question (noooooo!) and deciding to go back to her game. "This... means what?" She pointed to a line out of her textbook. She had backed out of the doorway, drawing me into the hallway to see. Somehow the SM posters seemed to disturb her. Good- at least she had some taste. I switched to Japanese, since I couldn’t give a simple English explanation. She listened politely, not wincing at my copious mistakes. Very kind of her, I noted. "Can I ask you other times, when I have trouble?" I was about to suggest Rachel, who actually lived in her dorm, but nodded instead. "Your roommate is... very interested in Sailor Moon?" Michiru had started to turn away and thought better of it. "Obsessed. You aren’t fond of it?" Michiru shook her head. "That’s for little kids." She left me to my confusion. Why did she play look- alike if she didn’t like the show. Fushigi... ********* "I don’t know what it is, but she’s one of us. You can feel it whenever you get near her." Michiru was back in her room. The history problem had been a pretext- she had been there to get an impression. Whatever skill at speaking English Michiru lacked, she had no comprehension or reading problems. Haruka looked up from her calculus book. "So?" "So it’s not over." They both knew what she meant. After Galaxia there had been quiet. Everyone had hoped life would go on. Now the question was whether this Mughi was aligned with good or not. "How should we proceed? She hasn’t made any indication she knows about us." Haruka tapped her pencil irritably on the desk. "If you think she doesn’t know- look at her room some time. Her roommate has pictures of us everywhere." Michiru rubbed at her temples. "My mirror confirms she has the power, but no more than that." "I vote for confrontation." Haruka did not go for subtlety. "When?" "As soon as I finish this." She went back to her proof. This stuff was easier than high school. Pf. Americans. ********** "Phone’s for you." Deanna handed over the phone. I snagged it, expecting a call from Jessica, another one of my friends and the only person except my parents who ever calls me. "Moshi-moshi?" It was traditional for me. "Moshi-moshi? Mughi-san?" It was Haruka. "Beesuboru daiya-ni ike.[7] " She hung up. [7-Go to the baseball field. (command- rude)] How rude. I decided that Japanese or not, I felt no need to go out to the baseball field at night for no better reason than a sophomore’s command. Even with the whole Japanese sempai system, being that rude to a frosh like me isn’t necessary. I returned to my work. But what if she was in trouble? I started to worry. Hating myself for being so pliable, I told Deanna I’d be out for a while, picked up my walking staff. As little as I cared about being near LA, I did realize that if the trouble was gangsta related that it might make me feel better. With that thought I jogged to the baseball diamond. It was starting to rain, but luckily I had worn my contacts that day. The sky was only partly clouded and the moon shone through every few moments. Out in my peripheral vision I saw something move. My nerves were bad enough, but I clutched my staff. I actually was praying for a mugger. I tend to be taken as a prude (true), a deferring type (true), and peaceful. Mellow, yes, but I dream of the day I get to be in a life or death situation so I’m justified in beating someone’s lights out. It’s sad, but true. At least I admit it. When I turned my gaze back to the path, the sudden appearance of Haruka startled me. Well, a better way of saying it; I fell flat on my posterior, my sneakers slipping on the slick cement. "DON’t do that. What’s with the getup?" I sat up, using my staff as a lever. Haruka was in a sailor outfit, the whole bit. "And may I suggest a slightly longer skirt?" Haruka looked even more grim. My tact had disappeared with the fall. "That is not in question." Michiru was behind me in similar costume. "If you don’t mind my asking; why drag me out here and then drop in with these... costumes?" I rubbed my offended behind as I stood up. "I thought you weren’t into this Sailor stuff." "Cut the crap" Uranus was invading my personal space. I couldn’t back up without getting into Michiru’s. I got the feeling something wicked was happening or going to happen. "What’s with the sudden perfect English?" "Subtitles" Michiru answered. "Right- subtitles." My mind didn’t come up with a snappy answer. "Seriously, what’s the problem?" "You." Haruka’s high heel boots put her on eye level with me. "Haruka, mou ii[8] ." [8-Haruka- enough. (familiar)] "Honto-ni! Fuzakeru-naa9 ." I snorted. I am far more rude in Japanese than in English. [9-Yeah! F*** off! (Reaaaaaally rude)] Haruka tensed, but her eye fell on Michiru behind me and she didn’t do anything. "We just need to know where you stand. Are you with the Senshi... or not?" The ‘not’ sounded unpleasant. "I am against anything as silly as a bunch of people in scanty costumes fighting evil and inevitably winning." "See!" Haruka took the opportunity to plant an uppercut in my chin. The only problem is that I didn’t hold still. For once I actually had a clue what to do with my rudimentary Aikido training. I met her halfway, caught her arm against mine and then flipped her elbow into ikkyo. For the uneducated, that’s one of the wrist locks that people are susceptible to. I never had used it on someone who was serious, but I found that adrenaline made up for any hesitation I’d had. Haruka’s face hit the cement. Ooops. Michiru had started to advance to attack, but I twisted Haruka’s wrist, partly to keep her down, since she hadn’t gotten the hint to stop struggling, and partly to elicit the hiss of pain that I needed to keep Michiru off. "Again, what is this about?" My staff sat beside me and I picked it up with my idle hand. "Why fight the Senshi?" "I fight? As I recall, she attacked me." "So, who’s side are you on?" "Mine. Back off please." Michiru had been edging closer. My hand was getting wet and my grip on Haruka was slipping. "Te*me*raaaaa[10] !" She was wriggling like an eel. She’s a good bit stronger than she looks, but in her position, strength matters about as much as eye color. I just pulled the arm back a bit, giving another tweak to Haruka’s twisted shoulder tendons. "No need to be rude." She gave a satisfactorily pained sound. [10-You b****. (not exactly, but it's rude)] That sound put off Michiru for the moment. I really shouldn’t enjoy this, I told myself... to no avail. Stalemate- I’d have to depend on basic human decency... something in which I have little faith. I eased my knee off of Haruka’s shoulder-blade, "Have you calmed down? I’m getting up now." I placed Haruka’s arm across her back carefully and backed away. She was up in a flash. Luckily for me, SM characters don’t know anything about fighting (according to what little I’ve seen) or she could have swept me handily... Absently I noticed that somehow the rain didn’t seem to mess up either of their hair, but mine was getting soaked. Michiru was holding a steamed Haruka back with a touch. Somehow Haruka had come up with a short plasticy- looking sword. It was almost as short as her skirt, but looked sharp enough. "You actually believe in this stuff?" I have a friend who honestly believes she is a changeling and talks to me about her wings, but Sailor people are a bit too odd for my tolerance. "You should be talking to my roommate- she’s the one who’s into this stuff. She babbles about how ‘you two’ are the perfect couple..." "Shitteiru-zo! Korosanakya...[11] " Haruka lowered her stance another inch. [11-She knows! We have to kill her! (boy-speak, pseudo- rude)] "But if you want to save the universe, go to downtown LA- more violent crime." I was setting to leave, turning my back on them. For those of you who might not know, this takes more than a wee bit of my low stores of courage to turn from an armed opponent, but I think the effect is worth it. I have a very cinematic mind sometimes. "I do congratulate you on your costumes: I sew myself and I have no idea how you get the bows that poofy." Neither of the two moved as I made my exit. ******** I returned to my dorm room wet and cross. Wierdo sailor-fan-atics. That is the first fight I had ever been in-for all my love of violence, I am too shy and mellow to get into that kind of situation. I decided I didn’t like it particularly. As much as being in control was nice, there’s too much uncertainty. I took out my ferret Scamp- my Christmas present from last December- and let her crawl in and out of my sweater. Nothing better than a ferret for a bad night. Deanna looked up, "What happened?" "You’ll love it. The two exchange students think they’re out of your favorite show." "What?" "I’ll introduce you if they don’t decide to kill me." "Kill you?" "They think that me knowing who they are is a threat- sounds like a fan-fic." "Which sailors are they?" Of course she would want to know that. Not what happened. Not if I’m all right. Hmph. "Those two. And I’m not teasing, so don’t ask if I’m serious." I pointed to the poster over Deanna’s bed of Uranus and Neptune in dramatic poses. "Seriously?" "Seriously." "Seriously?" "Really." "Oh..." Deanna had that fixed stare on the poster that meant her mind was drifting. ********* "Why did you let her go? She’s going to babble to her roommate, if not the whole school." Haruka glanced over to Michiru. "And they’ll believe her? Confronting her was a bad idea... now there is not going to be much of a way to learn anything about her." Michiru had crossed her arms and looked troubled. "I guess so." Haruka made the sword disappear and shifted out of her costume. Michiru followed suit. (Followed ‘suit’- get it? Oh, well.) "Being made into a cartoon makes pretty good cover, but there’s a bit too much truth to be learned." "Too late to worry about that. Dou shiyou[12] ?" [12-What shall we do? (familiar)] "Find a way to force her to henshin." Michiru gave a thoughtful look, pulled out an umbrella that she’d had with her normal clothes and opened it. The two walked back to their dorm side-by-side. "Maybe she really doesn’t know..." ******* "But why would they be interested in me. YOU are the fan." I was arguing with Deanna, who was humoring me kindly. "Well, if Neptune saw you in her truth mirror..." "Truth mirror? We are talking of *fans* who just go too far. And I have to see them every couple days at language table." I was peeved. ******* "Oi- Mughi-cha." Haruka had come up behind me. I do that to people sometimes, but I never realized how annoying it was. Besides, I’m neither fond of ‘chan’ diminutive nor of the way she left off the ‘n’ to make my name into ‘morning tea’. "Os[13] ." I paid attention to my own conversation... Japanese takes concentration for me. Haruka settled down beside me and proceeded to butt into the conversation and humiliate me in front of my teacher, who was also at the table. What am I supposed to do when I’m asked a question in boy-speak Japanese that I can’t understand at all? I made up my mind that vendettas may not be such a bad idea. At least she wasn’t threatening me today. [13-Hey (informal greeting- sorry for not translating earlier)] "Mughi-cha, maybe you should come and let me and Michiru tutor you." I sat stonily as I figured out what she’d said, then took the true Japanese way out, "I kinda have some business..." Technically there is no answer to get around this, so I thought I was safe. "Oooooh. She’s got a DATE." Haruka commented loudly enough for the entire table to hear. Sore point. I _don’t_ do some things: curse, smoke, drink, lie, or DATE. My mind sought frantically for a way to regain face. "That’s not it..." How to get out of this without lying? "Great- see you at 10." Haruka ended the line of conversation by turning to another native speaker at her side and discussing the latest in the races. I seethed- she did that to get rid of me... just because I don’t know the vocab of sports... I had no intention of going, but if I didn’t, sensei was sure to hear of it- good-bye grade. So at 10 I was reluctantly at their door wondering how I could be such an idiot as to be walking into the proverbial lion’s den. Luckily, homework seemed to be the only item of business. And they did help, more Michiru than Haruka actually, but who’s counting. My pen ran out of ink at one point but there was one on the desk in front of me that I just picked up. It was kinda weird looking, so when I saw it in my pack on return to my room I was peeved about having to take it back. I gave them a call to make sure they were still awake, but Michiru insisted that I need not bring it back. Joy. Now I have a pen with a shaped lil’ heart on it. I tossed it in the trash. Want not- so waste. Evil political nonsense was the night’s reading until I fell asleep atop my books around 2am. ******* "Did you get a decent reading off her?" "She’s clearly either Senshi or Starlight- how should we force a transformation?" Michiru lay back against Haruka’s chest. She smiled faintly, "A female Starlight... there’s a strange thought." "Let me take care of that one." ****** I was again having a very poor day. For one thing, that pen I threw away kept appearing back in my stuff. I was getting thoroughly wierded out. As much as I love fantasy, I tend to keep it on the printed page or silver screen. I did not need it in my backpack in the form of a silly pen that wouldn’t go away. Then I got stuck on my research project and had stayed through dinner in the library. It was dark, I was tired, and life was not done with me yet. "Oi Mughi-cha." I was beginning to dread that voice. "Nan-da[14] ?" I had decided I was going to be exactly as polite as she was- not at all. [14-What? (short- familiar)] "What do you do if your roommate is hanging off a lamppost and two wierdos won’t let you get her down?" It took me a moment to decipher the gist of her Japanese. "I smile and call Camp Sec" That’s Campus Security. I looked around but couldn’t place where Haruka was. "Coward." She had appeared behind me. Must be soft soled shoes she’s wearing. "Guilty as charged." I had to switch back to English for that. As I say, my Japanese is none too impressive. "So be it." She yelled something incoherent and a very impressive transformation scene left her in her costume. "Warludo Shiekingu!" I had sense enough to run. As little as I like Sailor Moon, I know what those two words mean and the transformation had convinced me something was seriously wrong here. The ground shook and I tripped. My pack went flying. That annoying pen came bouncing out of my pocket. I did -not- put it there. Good luck running away from someone who can do anime leaps. Uranus landed in front of me with her glowing sword. I was impressed with the leap, even though it did make her skirt flip up embarrassingly, but the short little sword was absurdly funny. I gave a giggle, something I never do- hysteria at the inexplicatable perhaps? She seemed further annoyed by this and charged. In Aikido we learned what to do in this situation, but whatever it was didn’t come to mind, so I started running. As I say- running from an anime leap is a poor pursuit. Something got me out of the way of the sword slash and I made it to a shedding eucalyptus. I picked up a fallen branch. Did I tell you that fencing is one of my other passions? Turning to defend, I saw that bloody pen floating in front of me. Floating? I grabbed it with my free hand and tossed it out of the way. Uranus had paused at this and I took the opportunity to lunge and plant the tree branch firmly in her gut. Evidently I missed the solar plexus, because she didn’t fold, but cut my branch in half and gave no more than a grunt to my blow. The blade slapped my hand, stunning my fingers and making me drop the branch. I can fight hand to hand... I think... anyhow, I weigh more than she does... Cardinal rule of fighting- Never Fight Someone Heavier Than You. f=ma A second and a half latter I was curled up on the concrete heaving my empty stomach. *She* had _not_ missed the solar plexus. Uranus was over picking up the pen. She seemed totally confused. I was recovering still when Michiru, out of costume, appeared, her heels clicking on the concrete as she jogged. "Uranus, wait- she doesn’t know.... oops. I see I’m late." She looked insufficiently chagrined in my opinion. "Yeah- she just tossed this away." Uranus showed the pen. Another belated thought crossed my mind: didn’t that pen look like those weird sticks they use to transform? Oh no- not another Self Insertion... wait a sec. Self Insertion implies action on my part. This is more like Sailor Insertion into my otherwise sane life. "...and you still did this to her?" Michiru was crouching beside me. I couldn’t care less. My diaphragm was starting to recover. "She attacked *me*. Am I supposed to just sit there?" "Haruka." It was sharp and scolding. "Right, like I’ve *ever* gotten into a fight before I met you." I had gotten my breath back. I shrugged off Michiru’s hand on my shoulder. My pride still stung. I had always maintained the illusion that I could put up a decent fight. I guess practice counts. "Then there is an explanation to be had." "Let me guess: you are the real Senshi, and that wand means I’m supposed to join you, so you follow me around and beat me up." I was not in the mood for tact, and somehow reality was not entering much into this evening. "If you’re from this solar system, you join us, and if you aren’t then we kill you." She said this in all seriousness. I cracked up. "You need a better script writer. Besides, I was born here; Earth. 2 hours south of here." The laughing was making my stomach hurt again, "And if I don’t know and don’t care? As much as I’ve always wanted to be needed for some greater purpose, SM was not what I had in mind. Besides, there aren’t any gaijin Senshi." "Then we keep harassing you." That was Haruka. She had tossed the pen-wand to me. I declined to catch it and it hung in the air in front of me. She grinned wickedly. "Your choice." Nice choice. "Given the choice between harassment and the skirt you’re wearing... harassment, any day." Haruka gave another evil grin, "if you got it, flaunt it. I see why you wouldn’t." "But I imagine that you enjoy it when _she_ wears one." I indicated Michiru. "Damn straight." So much for changing the subject. I do that in uncomfortable situations. I realized I was blushing. I scandalize easily. Haruka was taking joy in this, very obviously. As least the sword was gone. Silly as it was, it had slashed through that branch like it was jello. "But it is your destiny." Michiru started. "...Luke, I am your father." I finished. "Come to the dark side." At their collective blank look, I translated. "I think not. Why should I give up life as I know it to join short-skirt-clad people in fighting pink haired cutsey monsters?" "You’ve already taken the henshin wand. From that moment, your choice was made- your life will never be the same." Haruka’s face was unreadable. "Isn’t there some sort of Informed Consent clause?" Neither of them deigned to answer me. "Basic answer; no. I am going to wake up tomorrow and harangue my roommate for talking about you two... those two... whatever so much that they appear in my dreams." I made a ‘shoo’ motion with my hand. "The dream is only just begun. Be prepared; we’ll be meeting you again soon." Haruka’s costume shifted into jeans and plaid flannel shirt. She turned, "Ja, ne." I gazed after the two for a moment; where was reality when you needed it? Of all the fantasy stories to turn out to be true, why did it have to be SM, of all things. Grr. I made my way back to my room and immersed myself in work. Deanna sensed something amiss and questioned me mercilessly. I chose to not divulge anything, and she became disgruntled with me. At some early hour I fell into troubled sleep dreaming of bad anime. Deanna stayed up later than I, so I got to hear the strains of SM music as I drifted off. ************* "Good morningu!" Michiru slid her tray onto the table where I was munching a leisurely breakfast. I don’t have class till 11 on Wednesdays, so I got a chance to be social. Rachel and Jessica, two of my friends, were with me and the topic of conversation was the evil Japanese teacher that Rachel and I shared. "Gutenmorgan." Evidently she didn’t understand German, but I pretended not to notice. Inwardly I chided myself. I have never been so rude to anyone as I’m being to those two. Except maybe to my roommate, but not often! Rachel scooted over so Haruka could sit down as well. "Hey you. How’s the paper coming?" Rachel asked Michiru. "eeeto- not finished, but I have most of it." They chatted away; Rachel is a great conversationalist when she wants to be. Michiru ate daintily, while Haruka subsisted on a bagel and coffee. I finished quickly and left the table. Dream though it may have been, I get uneasy around them. Just some kind of presence. I paused. "Oh, Jessica- are you going to the concert tonight?" She nodded. "Cool. I have the best seats in the house if you care to join me." I work in the recording booth at two of the auditoriums on campus. A good job; lots of good music from the best possible vantage point and not too taxing. Just requires basic technical skills. And there’s room for somebody else if I care for company. Tonight’s concert was in the so called "Lil’ Bridges". It is a magnificent hall built probably a hundred years ago, and the acoustics are incredible. The performers were some orchestra from another college that was visiting. Jessica is the type to go to concerts, so I thought I’d ask her. "After Karate class? I’ll see you there." She waved me good-bye. ********* Wouldn’t you know it. Those two were invading every last bit of my life. When I got to Bridges and got the booth set up, I was paged that the program was written up for me. It’s a courtesy to write the times for each of the pieces being played for the Recording Tech so they can avoid clipping your music on the tapes. I also do DATs, but the performers don’t get those. When I went down, I very nearly ran into Joe, my supervisor. He stopped me. "Mugh- did you get the mics set up? There’s a major solo tonight that’s probably going to be taped off DAT by some folks..." He proceeded to remind me how to deal with soloists and block outside noise. He seemed particularly concerned that this be done well, and I kept that in mind. Best use the fades tonight and go for max applause time. I usually cut it, but... "Got that?" He had finished. "No problem. Lemme just pick up the program." I trotted back stage to the Stage Manager’s seat. As close as I can tell, his main job is to sit in a chair by the door and hold the auditorium’s keys when no one else is using them. And I think _my_ job is cushy! "Here it is." He handed me the program, times written along the side. I scanned it. A ninety minute show... this was going to cut it close on the tape. Then a name caught my eye. Kaioh Michiru, violin soloist. That was my soloist that I had to be so careful of? Great. I made my way back up to the booth and started to set up the tapes. "Hey!" Jessica was at the door. I didn’t look up, but kept writing song titles. There were a lot of them and I probably had just enough time to get them down before the concert started. "C’mon in and make yourself comfy. Oh- could you close the door after you?" I motioned with my free hand. There’s a stool and another chair in the booth with me. "Domo[15] ." [15-Thanks (familiar)] I looked up sharply. "Haruka asked if she could join us. It’s OK right?" Jessica sat gingerly on the chair and Haruka pulled up the stool. "Ah- sure. I noticed your suitemate is playing tonight." Haruka smiled at that, but said nothing. It was perhaps the softest expression I’ve seen cross her face. I heard the audience stop shuffling, so I doused the booth lights and prepped the mix-board. For a while I was caught up in adjusting sound levels, since the orchestra had not been kind enough to give me a sound check. When it was down to listening time, I looked back at my guests. Jessica was listening with her head tilted back and eyes closed. The orchestra wasn’t great, but their selection of music was admirable. Haruka was looking over my shoulder at the various machines I work with, but not with any interest. It was a while before Michiru was up. She walked on as a practiced performer does, looking out at the audience I know she can’t see because of stage lights, not squinting or concentrating on where she has to go. The violin is cradled in her arm, strings outward. She stood center stage, bringing the violin to her shoulder, raising the bow. Then, just as I thought she would begin, she gave a distinct look straight up at me, pausing, and then began. I was more than a bit taken aback before I realized she had been looking up to Haruka. Haruka was leaning by the little booth window, enraptured in the music. So music tames even the heart of the beast... I chided myself for thinking of Haruka in such terms. She’s just a poor soul who thinks she’s a SM character. If I had been any connoisseur of violin music, I probably would have been impressed. But I’m not. Violin is not on my list of enjoyable instruments- in fact, it lists closer to ‘Bagpipes’ than anything else. Still, the song was good, and the recording turned out just fine. I thought for one vicious moment about making a feedback loop in the DAT ‘by accident’, but dismissed the thought. The rest of the concert was uneventful. When I locked up afterward, the orchestra was packing up. I saw Michiru standing with her violin case in hand, waiting just outside the stage door. It was too late to turn around, so I continued that direction. I ducked out a side door, but had to walk underneath where she was standing to get back to my dorm. Why am I so stuck on avoiding her? Looking up, I saw that Haruka had joined her and was evidently congratulating her on a job well done. "They’re such a cute couple." Jessica had come up behind me, or perhaps she had been following me. I waited for her to catch up. I didn’t say anything but gave an incredulous look. "Oh Mughi- don’t be such a prude. Haven’t you ever had gay friends before?" Jessica was probably misinterpreting why I was avoiding them. "A Prude I am and a Prude I’ll stay- and you know I have gay friends." We continued walking. "But *they* get on my nerves." I decided to share all, wanting to get another opinion on my situation. I put my hand in my pocket, knowing for some reason the pen-stick would be there. It was and I drew it out. "You know what this is?" "No." "That Sailormoon thing my roommate is into? This is one of the little wands from it." I turned it over in my hand. It felt like it fit there. "Oh Mughi- did you make one for her?" I do little random acts of kindness for my roommate, including making stuff for her in my spare time at sculpture. "No- not this time. Here- toss it to me." I gave it to her. She did as I asked, and I did as the night before and watched it rather than moving to catch it. It did not float in front of me, but just hit my chest and fell to the ground. I blushed. "That’s not what happened last time." I picked up the pen. Stupid pen is trying to humiliate me. "I see- they’re playing tricks on you?" "In a manner of speaking." I tucked the pen back in my pocket. "There’s always revenge." Jessica, with her blond curls and baby face may look like an angel, but don’t let it fool you. She’s got a mean side that usually stays hidden but will rise at need. "No- not worth it. I thought of just spamming their e_mail or something, but that’d just be a declaration of war." I sighed, "And as much fun as that may sound, I really don’t need that in addition to my nasty Japanese course." "Oh- oh well." Jessica shrugged. She bid me farewell as I went in my dorm and she headed for hers. ******** I was just getting ready for bed when there was a knock at the door. Deanna was absorbed in a game of Solitaire (SM deck, of course), and hence could not be bothered to get it. I pulled on my bathrobe and opened it. "Oi- Mughi-cha. Is it OK if I come in?" Haruka was there. "Shinai-hou-ga yoi-ja-nai-ka? Rummeeto-wa iru- noni...[16] " I _really_ didn’t want to bring Deanna in on anything involving her. [16-Wouldn't it be better not to? My roommate's in, so.... (plain)] "Daijoubu-ze[17] !" Haruka walked in before I had anything else to say. [17-It's fine! (boy-speak, plain)] "Sugeeeee[18] " Evidently Haruka had seen the posters my roommate has up. Deanna turned around as I closed the door. [18-Wow. (colloquial)] "Deanna, this is... Haruka. Haruka, my roommate Deanna." Deanna was doing quick glances from Haruka to her posters. "But your legs are so _short_!" "The animators have to use the normal style." Haruka shrugged, not insulted. "And they make my hair look messy too." "But... but... your..." Deanna looked heartbroken. "Could you look upward a minute?" Haruka did and I sighed as Deanna inspected her eyes. "They’re greeeeeeeeen." "Nn." Haruka looked confused at my roommate’s obvious distress and brushed her hand through her hair. "Sorry- she liked the illusion that your eyes were blue." "So- so the other day... that _was_ Michiru?!" Deanna was beginning to spaz. "Un-hn." "Then, then... why are you here?!" "Going to school." Haruka shrugged again. "And why aren’t you dressed as a guy? Or are you?" Deanna can be clueless at times. "Ah- that was made up for the anime." Haruka posed, "And who could conceal a figure like this?" "Aaaaah!" Deanna was definitely spazzing. I was getting thoroughly sick of this exchange. "Great- so what can I do for you?" "Michiru decided to deal with you as a reasoning adult. Could you give one good reason not to humor us and henshin?" Deanna broke in. "What? Her? Hey! But then there’d be two tall, short-haired, blonde senshi who never wear dresses! And- oh. Wait. Why are you letting me hear this?" "Because even if you tell anyone they’ll think you’re deranged. And I’m counting on you to work on your roommate till she complies." Haruka stuck her hands in her pockets and leaned back against the bed frame. She noticed my ferret cage. "Ew- you keep one of those smelly rodents?" "She’s not smelly. Neither is she a rodent. Actually a mustelid." I took the opportunity to let Scamp out. She was in her hyper phase and streaked out. She examined Haruka’s shoes, untying the laces with her teeth. Haruka tolerated this with only a slight look of disgust. I moved to scoop up Scamp, but she rushed under my desk. "If something comes along and we need you, can we call?" "Somehow I don’t see your pride taking that very well- “ "Baka-yarou[19] . Michiru suggested it." [19-Idiot (rude form thereof)] "I don’t really care. If I’m needed, I tend to leap to the task, but I _don’t_ need a cute uniform to do it. Besides, you are assuming I’m with you." "Muuuuuughi! How could you be against them?!" Deanna again. "You don’t have the individual initiative or experience required to threaten us or anybody else, so we decided you are with us or doomed to obscurity." Haruka had the half-smile more famous to DragonBall characters than SailorMoon. Ooooh- she really knows how to lay it on. I finally got my hands on Scamp and draped her around my neck. She wouldn’t tolerate this and hopped off immediately. I was amazed Deanna had been so accepting of her SM idols as real people. "I’m not committing to anything I can’t do. And if you have done fine in the past without me, who says you need me now?" "Not me certainly." Haruka gave me a sideways look, "But it would suck to die because I couldn’t convince a *Doaho*[20] like you to help us." I’m not sure what the translation is of that word, but I got the gist. [20-(I don't know how to translate this one, but it's pretty rude)] "No. Final answer. And if you don’t mind- I have homework to do." I caught Scamp again and fed her back into her cage. She wasn’t pleased, but started clattering around in the maze of tubes I’d set up for her. Haruka shrugged, gave me a last nasty look, and left the room. I closed the door behind her only to find Deanna looking sorely disappointed. "What?! It’s *my* life. I get to chose it." I sat down heavily at my desk. "Besides, the story is over- the season’s ended." "No! Every time there is a new character, something new and terrible comes along!" She started giving me examples as I tried to immerse myself in homework. It didn’t work. Deanna can be really annoying when she wants to be. I managed to remain non-committal and was only somewhat in her bad graces by the time I went to bed. ************ The highlight of the next day was a boffer tournament. I didn’t really have time for it, but since I was the club’s main boffing advocate, I couldn’t very well bow out of my duty to the event. ‘Boffers’ by the way, are lengths of PVC pipe with all but a ‘hilt’ area covered in insulation and duct tape. They’re reasonably heavy and not fun to get hit with, but fairly safe. Unless they fall into the hands of my roommate. She’s timid at first, refusing to attack, but when she gets going, the word that first comes to mind is ‘berserk’. And she has the annoying tendency to hit my hands. Anyhow- I would have omitted this with most of my college life except those two happened by when we had the event. You know who. "Keep the tip up, or else you can’t block fast enough when I come high..." I had some newbies and was proudly teaching them the basics. "Thrust attacks are hardest, and my preferred method. It’s a habit left over from fencing class." I demonstrated. I love boffing. Not that I’m particularly good at it- but I’m not bad either. The newbie and I sparred a bit while others battled in the back. I let him get close, but there really wasn’t much of a contest. I got him on a quick in-n-out stomach shot. The effect was perfect; he was eager and yet not expecting instant victory. We joined the main battle. The victor of the day was a kid named Seth. He’s a black belt in Free style karate (including weapon kata, btw) and has been boffing most of his young life. I feel no dishonor in losing to him. Besides, I was the second to last out. A short burst of applause from the sidelines caught me off guard. Michiru was beaming as Seth made a theatrical bow to her. Haruka had her hands as far in her pockets as the tight jeans allowed and looked vaguely bored. Traditional. That girl needs to learn some common courtesy. "OK- let’s pack it in. It’s getting dark and the dining halls’ll close." I tossed my boffer down to start a pile. The others followed suit. We were all pretty tired after an hour. I was wondering whether a shower or food sounded better at the moment. "Oi- Mughicha." I turned around. "You fight well." I tensed for the following sarcasm. It didn’t come. "Ah- thanks. I’m not too good yet." I fully expected her to agree with me. She just shrugged. "Sad you can’t put the skill to use." She turned and rejoined Michiru, who had just been chatting to Deanna. "True." I called after her. "Why not join us next week? The practice would do you good." Just a hint of teasing there. She looked back with a wicked grin. "Sorry- I stick with the real thing." Deanna and I walked back to my room with our arms full of boffers. Deanna was talking more for her own benefit than mine, but I listened absently. "Ayo[21] ! Why why why! I always have these good ideas of things to say to her and they just come out all wrong and ..." This continued non-stop for the next twenty minutes. [21-This is a Chinese expression of frustration.] "Sounds like love-" I rolled my eyes. "Oh Mughi- don’t be wicked." She was giving me a hurt/disapproving look that I particularly don’t like. "I do wish they would leave me be." "You must admit that’s hard with us living in dorms right beside each other." Deanna tossed her load of boffers into the closet and I added mine. "Mmm. Feel like eating?" I offered Deanna my arm. She took it and we went to dinner. Bad food. That’s what they should write instead of a menu. We changed companies last year for food, but the food itself doesn’t change. But the company is good. The evening’s topics included chemical analysis, boffing techniques, the latest X-Files, and a short bit on the philosophy of relativity. For whatever reason, I couldn’t get those two- yes, _those_ two- out of my head. I was quieter than usual through the rollicking conversation... by desert I had made a decision. A fair one, I thought. A challenge- just so they would get off my back... whatever we could decide on. Just to get all the jostling and maneuvering over with for good. Mmmm- chocolate brownies tonight... I presented the pair with my proposal at lunch the next day. Conveniently, we were the first at the Japanese table, so I could ask simply. "Fine- martial arts?" Haruka crossed her arms and sat back. I finished munching my supposedly-a-quesadilla before answering. "No. I have no intent of getting beat up and I’m inept anyhow. It wouldn’t even be worth calling a contest." I can be humble sometimes, but this is the honest truth- I’m not going to get myself hurt without a good reason, and I’m not getting into a fight without the ability to go all-out. All-out being eye-gouging, nose ripping, knee-to-face kinda stuff. "Music? Independent jury?" Michiru asked. "With you?!" "Oh no. But since you play piano, I thought you and Haruka..." Haruka looked a bit skeptical. "No again. I play for fun and I have no style." I rested my chin on one hand. "Drawing? Any style?" "Too hard to judge." Michiru looked over to Haruka. "I don’t see why we have to deal with you at all. You’re just trying to take an easy way out-" Haruka had her eyes narrowed suspiciously. "No- I’m working on the assumption that you have _some_ sense of honor. I do. I will *not* break my word once it is given. Period. No discussion. I was hoping you’d have some instinct to the same." I gave her my second best Sand Tiger glare. She snorted. She met glances briefly with Michiru, then gave me her challenge. "Then let’s go to your territory. Boffer contest- whatever that was yesterday." I nodded. This tipped things slightly in my favor, though I had no idea how well Haruka could boff. It’s not the same as sword fighting... "You know the rules? No head shots, nothing at or below the knee. If your hand is hit- ignore it. Otherwise you can’t use the arm if it’s hit. If you’re hit in the thigh, you have to stop using the leg." Standard rules. Haruka had a short and rapid conversation with Michiru that I had not even a hope of understanding. "Torso shot wins? I just want to make sure you get this straight." "Sure." Haruka’s eye’s glittered fiercely. I suddenly wondered if I was making a very bad mistake. "Last thing- I need some recovery time after yesterday. Three days OK?" That would give my arms time to uncramp and bruises heal. The two left the table then, and I finished quickly so as to join the rest of the table’s conversation. People had trickled in as I had been hashing details and were having a discussion about the evils of any language with 3 alphabets. Then it struck me. The pair had come to language table, not eaten, and left immediately after talking to me. As if they were just waiting... no. There was no way they could guess what I was intending... ************** The day was nice and gray- cool and breezy. Perfect challenge weather. The grass wouldn’t be bothering my sinuses and there wouldn’t be any glare. The place was a private little field behind the college. It was assumed no one would notice us- better not to be noticed unless absolutely necessary. I waited with a choice of boffers in tow: short, medium, and two-handed. I always took short- it’s easy to maneuver and I can go for endurance runs... which is important when you are going all afternoon. But I wasn’t sure for this- how long would it take? Certainly I’d be more careful than usual, given the stakes, but what about Haruka? She’d probably charge in the way she does with her Space Sword thingy. Swinging wildly. I smirked at the thought. Swingers are easy prey. The two arrived. I noticed something odd immediately. Michiru, in pants? Haruka plopped herself down on the grass, and I got the clue. "*You’re* fighting?" "We thought it best." That changes things entirely. I’ve seen Haruka fight. Michiru- there is no clue what to expect. She took off her coat. "Also- we thought 2 out of 3 would be best... to counter luck." "Sounds good." I picked up my short boffer. Best to go with the familiar. She chose a short one as well. Fine. No range problem then. Haruka set the match. "Set? Go!" I kept a fencing stance; sideways to the opponent, feet fairly wide, but balanced so I could go either direction. Michiru did not advance, but held the boffer forward in a defensive pose. I waited. She waited. Then it began. She telegraphed well. Oh- telegraphing is when you change your stance in such a way that I know what you are going to do before you do it. She dipped and I started a short block. Slight smack. She wasn’t using any force. Or maybe she just wasn’t particularly strong. Most likely she doesn’t know to put her hip motion into the sword. Doesn’t matter. The next swing was low and I used the opportunity to get a short jab. She slid out of reach just in time. Now that we had parted, it was time to wait again. She came in sideways, this time, trying to get behind me. I know that trick too well, though, and got a shot at her right arm as she passed. She switched hands. I nodded encouragement... oops. I forgot this wasn’t a lesson. To my vast annoyance I found out she was well nigh ambidextrous. It didn’t matter. Her inexperience showed and I made an easy point. My usual- a poke to the belly through her open guard. She acknowledged the hit and stepped back. I caught the pose one moment before she went into the transformation sequence. They do actually have much more presence in costume... I dropped my stance very deliberately. "No- this was not in the deal." I put my hands on my hips. "How so?" Michiru had crossed her arms with boffer- sword in hand. Very GQ. "I challenged Haruka/Michiru. Not Neptune/Uranus." "The names may change, but the person is the same." Michiru had soft, half lidded eyes, but her voice was anything but almost defiant. "The story goes differently." Why was I so stuck that the story was true after telling Deanna so many times about how fictional Sailor Moon really was? "Then you know an incorrect story. The change came when we accepted our fate as Senshi- the form matters little. I am myself." She looked at me... no, through me, with her deep sea eyes. "OK- then I’ll boff the other you, if you don’t mind." She shook her head slowly. "You are so afraid... but this will be more fair than our last bout." I had to admit, there was no contest if she went back. Perhaps that is what I wanted. I guess the henshin just made me realize she was serious. I put my guard back up. "Ma- ikka. Have at it." Michiru switched to a longer boffer- I didn’t care. I had the feeling I was going to be on the defensive this time, and endurance would count. I was right. She came at me faster this time, and the swing was not one I could lazily counter. I was backed up slowly, and my wrists started to tense up from the punishment of hard blocking. I guess the thing about henshin really does do something for them physically, because Michiru hadn’t broken a sweat yet. And with the longer reach of her weapon, I had little opportunity for counter attacks. I made a short flurry that paused Michiru’s advance, but it didn’t last. We separated momentarily... NOW. "Rrrrrya!" I didn’t realize that I was yelling a ‘kiai’ until the word left my mouth, but I made a samurai- style run and slash that I was gratified to see was only just blocked. I was half turned and starting another lunge- I had barely even seen the blow coming. Not from any finesse, but straight speed. The slash hit me like a baseball bat across my stomach and I lost my footing I rolled backwards, having presence of mind enough to tuck my head out of the way. There was no way she’s had enough swing to put that much force into the blow, and she still didn’t put her hips into it. No way... I labored to get my breath back, hugging my stomach. I remembered this sensation from my soccer days, when the ball hit me just right. Michiru was waiting patiently for me to get up. If it had been anyone else, I would have admired the strike... but instead I was struck by an intense wash of hopelessness, and with it, anger. I hate to feel helpless. Perhaps more than anything else, it is the way straight to my animal brain, wherein reason has no say. At that moment, I would have given anything for an excuse to break her. But only a moment. Shame followed soon after, for the thought to do such a thing to have ever crossed my mind. I stood slowly. "Match off as of now." "It’s too late to back out." That was Haruka, and I could sense satisfaction in her voice. "No- this is getting too serious. I refuse to make this into anything uncontrolled. That kind of force in a life-and-death situation would be merited, but..." "That is what you don’t understand." Michiru interrupted, her oh-so-reasonable voice wavering just slightly. "It is a matter of life and death. People will live or die by the outcome on this field today. What we fight does not give quarter, play by the rules. It was hard to chose to give you even this marginal chance of escape." She tucked a lock of hair behind her ears. "Mughi- this is larger than any of us as individuals; we have given up life as we knew it, whatever hopes and dreams we had. Sadly, we must ask the same of you... insist the same. And the saddest part is that I know you won’t understand that until you have already accepted it." "Kinda like religion- you see it everywhere once you already believe?" "Perhaps." "Then I give you the same reasoning as for my indecision in religion; belief is not something you can control. You have it or you don’t." "You don’t believe yet? After what you’ve seen?" "Costumes. Some special FX. Admittedly out of my range of experience... but this evil you’re talking about has yet to appear; never reached the media in past or present. In the frame of logic, you two are still losing out." "That logic is why we are here today. Mughi-chan, we came half way around the world to find you. It is not chance that we’re here- perhaps fate entered in, but we came to seek the new Senshi. We couldn’t know if you were aligned with us or against us- perhaps your lack of decision on that point is more difficult than either option. And because we can’t refute you logically, we have to appeal to your honor." I was slow to pick up the boffer. I *had* challenged them. I really had no right to call off my own contest. I hate being so logical some times. But I faced Michiru-Neptune again. "Then have-at-you. One fall loses all." It was a quote from ElfQuest, but it sounded right. I assumed fencing stance again. Michiru smiled and fell into her own stance. Our eyes locked. I gave her my best Sand Tiger glare, but the impossibly placid eyes facing mine just swallowed it. She was deadly serious- more so than I have ever felt the need to be... Michiru’s boffer dipped slightly in my peripheral vision. I lunged into the opening, but her boffer’s longer reach gave her time to counter me. We traded blows for three or four minutes. Sweat was getting into my eyes. Gratifyingly, Michiru too was showing some signs of effort. One of my blocks wasn’t strong enough and I got a hit to the right shoulder. I switched hands and locked my other hand behind me. It was actually a welcome switch- my right wrist’d almost had it by then. Another one of Michiru’s shots got through, but slammed into the side of my head. I was blind for a minute as my contacts slipped off center, and my ears started ringing. "Ah-gomen[22] !" She apologized, waiting for me to recover. Illegal hit. At least she honored it as such. I took a slow breath and raised my weapon again. [22-Oh- I'm sorry! (plain)] There was no way I was going to win this straight out- she had better range and supernatural endurance to maintain control of a long-sword type boffer for this long. I couldn’t beat that combo with what little skill I had over her. Well then- something unexpected. I backed off a bit- we were separated by about 2 meters. Iku-ze[23] ! I launched myself forward, jumping into a forward roll. Another useful thing I learned from Aikido. But my thrust met empty air. I had been timed right, placed right, I hadn’t been hit... where was she? I was answered by a soft whoosh and she landed from her anime leap some distance back. Like 7 or 8 meters. A half-serious thought flitted across my mind. It might be worth becoming a Senshi, just to be able to do that... [23-Go! (boy-speak, rude)] There wasn’t any more time for thought. I don’t block quite as fast left-handed, and Michiru’s blows were unrelenting. I made an Aikido turn that gave me another good whack at her. Unfortunately, her shoulder got in the way. She switched hands and came right back at me. I had my flash of inspiration- Knocking her longsword thrust down as hard as I could, I jumped... landing with one foot pinning her sword to the ground, the other close enough to put me in range to hit her. I thrust viciously... an met air. She’d dropped her boffer to dodge. Her eyes narrowed for a moment. I tossed her boffer back to her... no contest with unarmed opponents. Being principled is disadvantageous in the extreme. The pause at least gave me a chance to catch my breath. She charged straight back into the fray. Left vs left, talent vs skill- I sincerely hoped that Japanese ideals were in force today and skill would win out. I came within a cm of being hit again. My blocking power was fading, fast. My stomach still hurt, my ears were still ringing... I was going to lose. As obvious as it was, the realization surprised me. Losing and accepting the consequences was the least of my problems. It was disturbing to my pride more than anything. I countered a long swing of Neptune’s, letting it slide and deflect itself off my boffer. I switched my grip to backhand- Neptune swung her sword back to guard in anticipation- and I symbolically made a thrust to my own stomach... jisatsu[24] as it were. I dropped my boffer, sat down hard, and began controlled breathing to lower my pulse rate. Michiru shifted back to civilian uniform, put down the boffer and accepted a handkerchief from Haruka to sponge her face with. I watched the clouds go by. Circulation made my lower arms itch. [24-suicide (no form)] "So- what exactly do you want me to do?" I asked. Haruka and Michiru had been talking softly- Japanese of course- with each other. I hadn’t been following the conversation... too tired. "Just tell us you will be there when we need you." Haruka turned to leave, Michiru’s arm intertwined with her own, "Sore shika onegai shiteinai[25] ." [25-That's all we're asking. (plain form)] No ask to do my own little ‘henshin’..? I assumed I could, since that’s what they had implied all along. There was something frightening about the prospect that I would remember a life that I couldn’t consider ‘my own’ in a time and a place totally illogical in my mind. Would I be someone else? What is it that makes me what I am? "Mughi-chan. Why did you concede?" Michiru had half turned toward me. I considered for a minute. "Because you were right." That’s what it came down to. There was the issue of pride- but pride should not have permitted what I’d done... I left the answer hang. Michiru seemed satisfied. She and Haruka walked back toward Oldenborg dorm. I watched them go, how Michiru let her head fall against Haruka’s arm. I sat in that field for almost an hour, thinking of what had come to pass and what would come to be. ## ##- -## ### # I came to the conclusion that the duo hadn’t needed me yet, so there was no indication that they’d be needing me any time soon. If I chose- life would go on exactly as I’d always lived it. But I have a propensity to wonder, to be curious, and to plan. I had no more time that day to worry about such things- but when the weekend came and my homework loosened its choke-hold on my life, curiosity got the better of me. What would henshin be like? How did it work? What was this ‘change’? Would I end up with some horribly annoying name, like Uranus? A fate worse than death! Well, not really. I went back to that same field of the challenge- it was the most private space I could think of- and got out the little wand. I turned it over a few times, just to get the feel of it. Smooth. Seamless. I was uncertain how the spinning thing would work- I had to assume it was the same as the sequences in the anime. And that spin doesn’t work in gravity. Oh well- the worst I could do is look silly to myself. I raised my hand straight over my head. The wand was warm. I opened my hand and it began its spin- and something flooded my mind... #=– #For this scene: use Donna Lewis’ "Light of Life" (track 9)# The first memory was silence. Crawling- no, dragging myself. My people (?) were burned remains of corpses in smoldering buildings. I cursed the Palace of the Moon- leave the independents out of your politics! The smoke was so thick as to no longer rise, but hang in the air. My lungs burned, but I felt no pain. This was beyond pain- they were all dead. All. Those I had played with in youth, those I had learned from in time, those I had taught... there was only Silence. I reached the shade of a broken wall and the burnt corpse of a tree... Lean back. Release. Let the star seed go- the sign of royal birth and essence, soul perhaps... let go. I bled heavily into the baked ground, waiting for death. I never had the chance to say good-bye. Because of Serenity- I had spent all of one day in court- to protest the independence of my people and my lands. Curse thee- A light snow began to fall. Where are the lights? It was the first snow; time to celebrate... And I saw a light. It was above me. I realized I had fallen over from my position against the wall. The stars above. One after another, the stars were fading out. But one, two... I counted 10 of them- shooting stars, which converged. It is the royal family- my vision began to fade. I fear death. No more defiance. No more blame. I felt myself fading from existence... Shinitakuneeee[26] !!! [26-I don't want to die!!!!! (emphatic plain form)] In a miniature nova, I was no more- but the will to live was still fierce and drove the very essence of me- my star seed- into the night sky. Follow the 10, the royal family... if there was any way to save my people, even myself, it could not be alone. My consciousness fragmented in the ether. #=– "My people owe you no allegiance." I was there, in court. Crystalline white pillars flanked the room. Endymion and Serenity were seated at their thrones. I refused to think of them as king and queen. They were not my rulers. "We are an independent state- self sufficient. That we are separated in space as well only strengthens our claim." Serenity shook her head solemnly. I remember a surge of anger... #=– I remembered parents who were not my own, home that I’d never seen, a civilization I could not believe existed. I remembered... and it was my own. I remember these hands, the same little imperfections, held before me to an impossible creature. I remember the tears that fell down my nose the day it died. I shivered. Two memories, two times, neither refutable in my mind. The set of experiences that had flooded into me mixed with my standing ones- until they could not be pulled asunder. If I had not had such a tendency to introspection, the feeling might have passed in that instant, but I would not let it go. I, who have never broken a bone, holding a shattered wrist to keep it from moving. Paradox. But there were things that made so much more sense. I was the type who would imagine horrible violence, learn how to perpetrate it, but never raise a hand against another being. But I am Senshi- and I will protect at any cost. I studied magic, occult, chi, the supernatural, hard core sci fi... perhaps to explain what I could not- that which my soul knew existed. Perhaps... perhaps... #=– I was standing alone in the challenge field. The Senshi costume was natural- it didn’t feel silly the way I thought it might. Sailor Asteroid..? Kinda cheezy- but tolerable. Like my civi name. There was no more reason to be curious- I knew what I needed to. Michiru was right- it wasn’t a part of me, a side of me... it was just me. It was hard to believe I had ever been any different. I shifted back to civi cloths. The wand obediently had disappeared. I looked up to where Neptune and Uranus were perched on the rooftop. They had been there from the start. *Wakaru-naa, omae-tachi. Kono chikyuu-o zettai mamoru- zo[27] .* [27-I understand you. I will protect this earth absolutely. (slightly country, boyish, plain)] I couldn’t see them from this far, but somehow I had the feeling that the pair were smiling in satisfaction. I returned to my room- fended off Deanna’s questions with vague answers- and finished off my homework. The future is now. epilogue: The new evil came. It consumed the minds of innocent young, first in Japan, then spreading across the world[28] . I fought it with the others, and eventually we emerged victorious. My schoolwork suffered somewhat, but it didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. [28-It came in the form of a poorly drawn animation series... ^_^] The two? They finished their semester at my college and returned to Japan. I spent the summer with them... Haruka and I became friends, oddly enough- but Michiru I could never really get close too. She always had the air of manipulativeness that I could not pierce... I met the others in their own lives; I still despise Usagi. But tolerance is something I did not lose the day of the challenge field. It was something Sailor Asteroid had lacked, but learned through who I had been. **This anti-fan fiction is dedicated to Deanna Fang, my former roommate. She is writing her own fan-fic... she is giving it to me for a graduation present this spring (‘99). Oh- Any disjunction in the writing of my story can be blamed on a 4 month hiatus taken while I was in Japan. **Author’s note: As opposed to Beans, I actually do speak Japanese with some small felicity... it is my major. Reading, on the other hand... just pass Nelsons (really good kanji dictionary) my way. I am an Otaku and a Prude. I still think Sailor Moon is intended for the pre-adolescent age group, but I will admit there are a very few good aspects within it. My background is basically what my roommate has told me, Bean’s College Life story and about 4 episodes that my roommate made me see. Hence, there are probably major inconsistencies in character actions, reactions, histories. Sorry people- I am not a fan of SM. I chose to write myself into a story because I had to have a main character that I understood well enough that I could ignore the SM character’s perspectives as much as possible. Since I would never submit my own characters to anything so horrible and Deanna refused my invitation to join the story, I was forced to intercede. I tried to bring up things that wouldn’t appear in traditional fan-fics, namely a dislike of the SM characters, questioning of purpose, resistance to self-insertion, and a firm grip on reality. I realize that the scenes are choppy, but I have trouble doing fill-in work.