(or, Jinpei Pulls an AWOL, but Hey, Everything is Fine!)

(mostly written on April12, 1998)

(please insert author's standard disclaimer regarding copyright infringement, C&C, and taking this Diary entry seriously here.)

So the episode begins underwater, with schools of fish in the deep blue sea, and my favorite person in the world, the Narrator from H*ll, tells us that Galactor was doing a very good job of making a great big nuisance of itself, and I am thinking, well of course it is, otherwise how could this show have lasted the 200 and then some episodes that it did (not to mention movies). And NfH tells me that Dr. Nambu had decided to build a secret undersea base for the Science Ninja Team.

And then we get a fleet of tiny little subs that look remarkably like catfish, and whenever I see catfish I remember the joke that goes "what is the difference between a lawyer and a catfish, one is a pond bottom scum sucker and the other is a fish." Anyway, we get a shot of inside one of the subs, and we see that it is a two man-sub, and one of the crew says the ocean is always peaceful, I always enjoy looking at it, so from that line you can kind of tell this sub is going to go the way of the Earthquake Research Center and the Volcanic Research Center and the Undersea Base (from episode 5, the Ghost Fleet episode). And the other sub crew member, who judging from the way he is speaking is the other man's subordinate, says that this far under it is hard to think of pollution, like there they go with the show's obsession with pollution again. The superior officer on the sub says that the undersea base is being built so that they can make the world above water just as beautiful, and the subordinate says that he hopes Dr. Nambu finishes the base really soon. Superior officer says their current mission's purpose is to aid the completion of the base, and then, just when you're thinking that it's about time someone says "what in the H-E-double-toothpick is that," the Subordinate Officer says what in the H-E-double-toothpick is that, like one of these days I am going to watch all the episodes with a stopwatch in hand so I can sit and time how long it takes from the beginning of the show until someone says "what is that!" in each episode, and come up with an a mean value and standard deviation. And the monster of the week is...

What is that, anyway? (This is me wondering, not someone's line.)

I would never have been able to tell, if the Superior Officer hadn't hollered, "It's a sea anemone monster", because it looks like the result of some kind of twisted biological experiment involving a crab and a sunflower and massive amounts of growth hormone. And the rear view window of the sub breaks, and water flows into the sub, and the Subordinate and Superior officer scream, and the sub fleet turns back, but the sea anemone grabs some of them with its long tentacles, and some of the tentacles fire lasers, and the subs are running away at full speed, and we get subs being blasted, and there is an explosion, and the screen is red, and (this is kind of cool) we pull back and we are looking at a red helium balloon caught in a tree.

Apparently we are in a park, and Ken is taking a balloon down from a tree and giving it to a little girl, and the little girl, who is drawn in the typical traditional style used to depict Tatsunoko children (read "hideously ugly"), says thank you, and the other kids in the park are impressed with Ken, and we get a shot of Jinpei leaning against a tree playing with his bolos.

The boys are all impressed with Ken, saying he's like Gatchaman, and that he looks like Gatchaman, which kind of tells us about ISO security, or lack thereof, if little kids know that Ken looks like Gatchaman. And Ken asks them if they have ever seen Gatchaman, and they say no, but that he's their hero in white wings. And Jinpei comes over and says that he's a big fan of Gatchaman, and that he knows quite a bit about him, and Ken tries to stop him, but Jinpei goes on to ask the kiddies who they their favorite member of the Science Ninja Team is. And (this is rather creative, too) we get shots back and forth between Jinpei, who keeps asking who their next favorite is, one by one, and the kids, who keep naming other members of the team, one by one, and Jinpei looks more and more disappointed, as he doesn't hear his name, until the kids say "the puny one, G-4, comes in 5^th place, last!" and I really wonder about these kids calling G-4 puny because you can tell from this shot that Jinpei is a lot taller than any of them. The kids laugh, and Jinpei is unhappy about being the least popular, and Ken laughs and tousles Jinpei's hair, and the fanfic people could have fun with that one.

Cut to a narrow street with buildings on either side, strangely reminiscent of a painting by Utorillo. Jinpei is unhappy that he, an 18^th generation Iga ninja, is the least popular. Ken tells Jinpei that he is doing a fine job, and that he has nothing to be ashamed of. Jinpei vows to become most popular. Just then, the wristcoms go off, and it's Dr. Nambu telling them they have Emergency Orders, launch the Godphoenix, and Ken is like whatever, and Jinpei says this is his big chance, and they say Bird Go, in the MIDDLE OF THE STREET, like you can understand how the little kids know that Gatchaman looks like Ken, if they're going to go to Birdstyle in the middle of the street, like couldn't they just have waited until later??

Cut to the control room of the GP. Dr. Nambu is telling the Team about the Secret Undersea base, and how they need it in their battle against Galactor, and that the base will serve as the home base of the GP, and that it will be the castle of the Science Ninja Team. Jinpei is happy that he gets a castle, and that that means that he will be a prince, and Jun, who is very badly drawn today, says that he would make one overeating, hyperactive prince. Dr. N continues to say that they have to assume that Galactor already knows about the secret base, because someone destroyed surveillance vessels in the area about ten days ago. Joe is like drat Galactor. Dr. N tells them that they are to patrol the area surrounding Point B in the Pacific ocean, where there is an uninhabited island. Jinpei says "you mean the undersea base is near the island?" and Dr. Nambu says that that is where Galactor will be, and that they are to search the area. Jinpei is like, what, just search, like Jinpei had better lean manners, and Dr. N is like are you deaf, patrol the area and tell me what you find. And Jinpei is all disappointed about how he can't carry out his plan to be most popular, and Dr. N goes off on his standard spiel about the primary mission of the Science Ninja Team being searching and not destroying, and Ken is like whatever, and Dr. N says good luck and signs off.

Joe goes "patrolling, again?" like go Joe, and Jinpei is like no fun, and Ryu is wondering if Galactor is really going to show, and Jun is wondering if Dr. N hasn't got something up his sleeve, and I can imagine a couple of things that Dr. N could have up his sleeve but this is server belongs to a national university, and therefore belongs to the Japanese Ministry of Education and the Ministry of Health, so I won't go there. And Ryu says "that must be the uninhabited island that Dr. N was telling us about", and you wonder how fast the GP was flying, because they got there awfully fast, and Ken says all right, let's dive into the ocean and circle the area, and we get a shot of tentacles poking out from under the water, but the Team doesn't notice and the GP dives under.

Audience Chamber. Purple Doberman on Speed telling Giant Blue Chicken that the GP is patrolling the area around the uninhabited island, and that that probably means that the base is there someplace. GBC like whatever, find it and blast it to bits. PDOS like whatever.

Cut to Jinpei sitting in the bubble on top and eating and watching the fish, which is really cute. Jinpei seeing a big shark, freaking and going back down, which is even more cute. Jinpei being laughed at by the rest of the Team. Jun teases him about being scared of a little shark like that, and that being a fraidy cat loses him popularity points. Jinpei is like, Ken, you told, and everyone laughs, which is kind of cute. Jinpei is like you wait and see. Then they see the Crab/ Sunflower/ Growth Hormone experiment, and Jun freaks, and Jinpei teases her back with pretty much the same words only he says sea anemone where she said shark, and what I want to know is how on earth he knew the thing was supposed to be a sea anemone when it has eyes and legs. Ken says that there is no way a sea anemone could be that big, and Joe is like the thing is huge, and Ryu is like the thing is huge, and that the tentacles are poisonous, and Ken tells Ryu to go around that thing, like don't try and investigate it or anything, Ken, I mean, it's not like you guys are under orders to PATROL THE AREA AND REPORT TO DR. N ANY ABNORMAL ACTIVITY or anything, and it's not like a giant object that can't decide if it wants to be a crab or a sunflower is out of the ordinary, you know.

And Ryu tries to navigate the GP around the darn thing, and then the thing HOPS, and Ryu is like it's following us, like that is very observant, Ryu, and Ken goes "it looks like this isn't your run of the mill sea anemone," LIKE THAT TOOK A FOUR DIGIT I.Q. TO FIGURE OUT, Ken. And Jinpei, teeth chattering, asks "then what on earth is it?" and then, this is kind of cute, Joe says, in this spooky voice, "A monster!" and Jinpei jumps and tells Joe not to scare him like that.

The Sea Anemone fires laser beams, and Jun falls, and we get a flash of white, and I was going to say that the adolescent male animaniacs were probably hitting the slow button to see Jun's white undies (or whatever they are), only when you stop and think about it, VCR's probably weren't that common in 1972, so they probably didn't have tapes, much less slow buttons, so likely, the next Monday at school or wherever ('cause, shout out to Susan Johnson-sama for telling me this, Gatch was originally aired on Sunday nights,), the kids were going "did you see Jun's undies?" and the kid who happened to be helping to set the table at 6:11 p.m., and didn't get a glimpse of white that everyone else got, probably was all disappointed that he had missed out on the pornography.

And Ken says, so it's Galactor after all, and Joe is like they are looking for the undersea base, and Jun says that the sea anemone must be responsible for destroying the patrol subs, and Jinpei is all excited that this is his big chance, and Jun is wondering why Jinpei is so excited, and Jinpei says that is because he has clear cut goals, and he does warm-up exercises, which is rather cute.

Ken tells Ryu to put up a smoke screen. The GP circles around the Sea Anemone, and yes, Ken really did say smoke screen, and I am wondering how you can blow smoke underwater. The sea anemone fires laser beams from its tentacles, but the GP escapes.

Now, this next scene is very, very weird. Night has fallen. The GP is sitting under a full moon on the beach, and the entire team is asleep outside of the beach in the sand, except for Jinpei, who is having flashbacks of the park and the little kid saying "the puny one, G-4, is last!" Jinpei mutters something about showing everyone, and gets up and trips on Ryu's arm. He gives Ryu's arm a kick, but Ryu doesn't wake up. He gets into the G-4 machine, and leaves, and we get a shot of him moving the two sticks back and forth, and the controls remind me of when I was in university, and we had a school festival, and my job was to watch the "funny bicycle exhibit", which was basically a bunch of strange bicycles that you pedaled with your hands or stood up to ride, only no one came to try the bicycles, so I was bored out of my skull, so I started riding one of the bicycles, which you pedaled by moving two levers back and forth alternately, just like Jinpei does with the controls of the G-4, and just as I was doing this, this upperclassman who I had this hopeless crush on passed by and laughed at me, and I was royally mortified. (I found out later, of course, that the guy was a total…well, my vocabulary of four letter English words is limited so I won't try to describe him here.)

Question list. 1) What kind of substances are the Team on, leaving the GP above water, in full view, under a full moon? 2) What kind of substances are the Team on, sleeping outside of the GP, open to any type of enemy attack? 3) What kind of substances are the Team on, all of them sleeping at the same time and not taking turns keeping watch? 4) What is it with the controls on the G-4?

And it is morning, and the Team is looking up at the empty space in the right wing of the GP, and Ken says Jinpei has gone off alone, probably because he wanted to be the hero, and Jun is like, do you mean he went to find the Crab/ Sunflower, and Ken says yes, and the four of them jump on the GP, and I am wondering how people who can't mark higher than 2 meters and do not have benefit of Birdstyle board the GP.

NfH informs us that the GP looked for Jinpei, and they tried to call him, but several days passed, and I am thinking, gee the Team is badly drawn. Jun is wondering if he got caught. Ryu says it looks that way. Joe, who is DREADFULLY drawn in this shot, says something about the little brat making them worry. Ken says this is Jinpei, remember, he has to be alive someplace. And sure enough, the next shot is of Jinpei, sitting in front of his G-4, fishing, and pondering where the Sea Anemone monster is, fishing up a puffer fish that puffs, and he makes a puffy face back at it before throwing it back into the sea, which when you think about it is pretty smart, because puffers contain a lethal neurotoxin. And we hear Ken over Jinpei's wristcom, and Jinpei ignoring him, saying that he can't go back empty handed after pulling an AWOL.

Cut to Crab/ Sunflower.

Cut to shot of Pac-man, oops, didn't mean to give away my age there, G-4 underwater. Jinpei is wondering where the darn Sea Anemone Monster is, and he finds these undersea buildings, and figures it is the Secret Base Dr. Nambu is building, and then he is caught from behind by the Sea Anemone and swallowed, no pun intended, and I just remembered that Sea Anemones don't have an entrance and an exit to their digestive tracts, they have a hole in their digestive tracts, and things come in the way they go out, and when our seventh grade biology class found this out, they had the typical adolescent humor field day with it.

Katze is like thanks for dropping in. Jinpei cuts back through Pac-man's mouth, thanks for showing me in, I was looking for you. Katze is like thanks for showing me where Dr. Nambu's base is, we've been following you in this Sea Anemone all along, we're going to blow up the base. Jinpei is like oh waste products, and I would be too if I were a so-called ninja who couldn't figure out that this huge whateveritis was following me. So Jinpei tries to break out of the sea anemone thingamajig by ramming against the walls, only the walls are stretchy, and not only that, they open up to reveal Green People, who open fire, and then the G-4 opens its mouth to reveal (this is so cute) a chainsaw that cuts through the wall, and the Green People fire on the chainsaw, and the blade goes flying off, so the little arm thing retracts and comes back out with (this is so cute) a punching bag and punches some Green People, but they capture the G-4 in a fish net. And Jinpei protests that he's not a fish, and Katze is like so we'll let you watch us cook the base before we cook you, and Jinpei is like rats. Katze is happy. The Sea Anemone jumps. Please note capitalization.

Jinpei is like oh waste products, I gave away the location of the secret base. He calls the others over the wristcom. Jun, who is DREADFULLY UGLY in this shot, says "he's alive!" and Jinpei says the monster is trying to blow up the Secret Base, and Jun is like what are you talking about, and Ken is like Galactor knows where it is, and Jinpei is like come quick. Joe tells him to sit tight and maintain contact, and tells Ken that Jinpei is southwest. So Ken tells Ryu to surface and fly that-a-way, and Ryu is like whatever.

So the GP is flying, but the Sea Anemone is swimming.

PDOS is happy, and says they'll just fire from a safe distance, and the Sea Anemone fires beams from its tentacles, and there are explosions, and PDOS is happy some more.

Jinpei says, oh no, please God (and I kind of debated whether to capitalize that one, but I have a theory that Jun and Jinpei spent part of their childhood in a Christian Missionary Home, so I have opted to capitalize).

O.K. I am confused again. Ken says, "Oh, no! We're too late!" only, his lips don't move. And he screams and breaks the cover of the Bird Missile button, which looks just like the way it did the last episode, a red circle with a clear cover. Jun screams "Ken! Jinpei is in there!" but Ken fires the missiles anyway, and it blasts the top of the Sea Anemone, and the tentacles and (this is kind of morbid) the eyes fall to the sea floor. And what I am wondering is, does everyone think it totally out of character for 1) Ken to fire the Bird Missiles, 2) Ken to fire the Bird Missiles in a fit of rage, 3) Ken to fire the Bird Missiles in a fit of rage, without permission from Dr. Nambu, 4) Ken to fire the Bird Missiles in a fit of rage, without permission from Dr. Nambu, knowing that Jinpei is in there. All comments (and fanfic! ^.~) on the subject welcome at the usual e-mail address.

So Ken puts his hand on Ryu's shoulder, and says "Ryu", and Ryu says, got it, and I am wondering if the fanfic people had fun with that one. Ryu lands the GP where the tentacles and eyes of the Sea Anemone used to be, and the (surprise!) four of them enter, so I guess we're not going to get the standard shot of Ryu asleep this episode.

Instead we get a fight sequence, and as I am sure everyone knows from reading Diary entries for other episodes, I am not big on fight sequences, but I have to mention that there is one long, long shot of Jun's...well, hips if you will, while she kicks Green People. They shoot the net that is holding the G-4, and it falls. Ken tries to grab PDOS, but he runs into the wall (as I have mentioned before, the walls open up and close), and all Ken gets is a fistful of purple fabric. PDOS is all happy and declares victory based on the fact that he blew the base to bits, and that he'll blow them to bits next time.

The GP leaves the crumbling Sea Anemone digestive tract. PDOS is in his escape pod, all happy, thinking he has destroyed the base.

Cut to control room of GP. We see Dr. N on the monitor, who, strangely, not only seems to have found his Ducolax, but also seems to have lit a joint and inhaled. Ken apologizes to Dr. Nambu. Jinpei says it is his fault for going off alone. Dr. Nambu says well done, and the Team is like what is this dude smoking? Dr. Nambu says thanks to them, the secret base is complete. Jun starts to remind Dr. N that Galactor blasted it to bits, but Dr. Nambu laughs and says that what they blasted was a decoy base. Joe is like, you mean you were messing with us too? And Dr. Nambu is like yes, way to go G-4. And Jinpei isn't sure if he is supposed to be happy or not. Ken wants to know where the base really is. Dr. N tells them to look down. Jun says all she sees is a crescent shaped coral reef, and Dr. N says that is the place, and that it can go wherever it pleases, so come on in.

The GP dives, and we get a shot of Dr. N watching them head toward the base, and for once Dr. N's glasses actually have side frames, but only for one instant because on the next shot they don't. The Team is impressed. NfH tells us the Science Ninja Team's secret undersea base was complete, dares Galactor to destroy world peace, because as long as there is the Science Ninja Team, as long as there is Gatchaman, the earth will be protected!

Whatever.

Points of interest. The editing was cool on this episode. The explosion fading into the little girl's red balloon was neat. And the shots of Jinpei's face growing more and more disappointed as the little kids in the park named their favorites one by one and didn't get to him until last were cute. Also, the fact that this is the first non-Ken episode is of note. Ken's doing something in a fit of rage was new and different, too. But if I were Jun, I would have put Ken's backside in a non-geographic location for firing missiles at the Sea Anemone when they knew Jinpei was inside.

And I really, really wish they had done fewer shots of Jun's hips.

(^-^)/))