Ranma 1/2

Anything Goes Battle Arena

The Setting:

Hikaru Gosunkugi was perched in a tree, located in a park in the Nerima District. With his camera in hand, he looked at the various people in the park from his hidden location. As he looked. he was lost in blissful thought, "Oh, who could ask for a better job? Nabiki is actually paying me to take pictures of my beloved Akane. I could spend the rest of my life doing this!"

Just then, a beautiful girl caught his eye. He was disappointed to see that it was not Akane, but Ukyou Kuonji instead. Wanting to pass the time until Akane arrived, he said, "Well, perhaps Nabiki can sell pictures of HER to Kunou. If not, then I'll get to keep them for myself!" He aimed his camera at Ukyou and began to snap off several shots.

Ukyou walked through the park, and stopped when she thought she heard something. After looking around a for a few seconds she shrugged and continued to walk. A few seconds later, she heard a yell of surprise. She looked over to see Hikaru Gosunkugi falling out of a tree with a camera in his hand.

Gosunkugi stood up and brushed himself off, then looked at the tree, "That's odd. I suddenly lost my balance and fell down. " He turned to look at Ukyou, expecting her to be very angry once she found out he was taking pictures of her, but instead he saw her running away very quickly.

Suddenly, he heard a voice shout out from beside him, "Wait! My dear, dear Ukyou! I saved you from this stalker! Please come back!" Gosunkugi stepped to the side in surprise as the tree he was hiding in sprouted a head and started to run in Ukyou's direction. The tree didn't look very mobile, however, as it tripped and fell to the gound, falling apart as it did.

From the rubble rose a girl about Gosunkugi's age, dressed in a purple and white sailor-style dress. Gosunkugi noted that although she looked very cute, there was something very strange about her. Dismissing that thought, he watched the girl turn around to face him, a furious expression on her face, "How dare you chase off my dear, dear Ukyou? I sat in that disguise for days waiting for her to pass through, and you RUINED the moment! I, Tsubasa Kurenai, will bring you to justice!"

Gosunkugi started to look around the park again, semi-ignoring Tsubasa, "Oh, go away will you? I have to find another place to hide before Akane gets here." He found a tree which would provide him a very concealed vantage point, and started to walk off in its direction.

Tsubasa intercepted him on his way, and glared at the boy, "You stalk not only my Ukyou but Akane as well? I'm gonna make you pay!" Tsubasa took a fighting stance, and growled threateningly at Gosunkugi.

Gosunkugi grinned in a sinister fashion, and reached into his school bag for his voodoo mallet, "I don't like to strike cute girls, but if you insist on standing between Akane and I, you must be punished."

(This match suggested by Spanner)

Commentary:

Alex Small

Tsubasa Kurenai will be the victor. After days of waiting around in some disguise for Ukyou to show up, his desperation level has to be very high, and after seeing her run away, he can only take his frustrations out on Gosunkugi. Motivation aside, Tsubasa showed that he is at least strong enough to punch the crap out of Ranma (although he wasn't defending), while Gosunkugi showed that he is somewhat of a clutz, unable to land a surprise attack on a group of thugs.

Justicar

Tsubasa wins by default. Gos is a loser. He is the ultimate loser. He is also a pencil-necked geek and wimp, but that's secondary to his ultimate loser status. Given all that, how does the Tsubasa-Man pull this off? He's not exactly a powerhouse, but he's still a guy under all that lace. He's better built and generally more coordinated. He could run over Gos in mailbox form, or turn himself into some other large cumbersome object. Gos has only one true attack being that spike, his voodoo has little chance of actually working. If it did he would probably be on the recieving end of it. Tsubasa also has the option of dressing up as Akane to totally mess with Voodoo Spike's mind. If it ever gets to actually exchanging punches Gos is doomed, because Tsubasa does have the physical advantage.

Drakli

Well, I've got to support my USURP patron, haven't I? Don't worry, I've got other reasons, as well. Whilst both fighters, in this instance are masters of camuflauge, only Gosunkugi knows from tactics. Tsubasa is a very straightforward assailant, simply charging into battle with only a battle cry, and a sutibly hard costume. Hikaru, on the other hand, is known for his sneaky tactics and dirty tricks. (More power to him for it!) And even though being clobbered by a mobile mailbox would smart, Gosunkugi has also demonstrated that he is tougher than he looks. (Getting right back up after being crushed by his own trap, in the Cat fu story, for example.) Tsubasa's given no such indications, that I've seen. Also, as Gosunkugi's Official Hammer and Nail Supplier, (in name of USURP) I do have a little inside info... I have personally insured that Gosunkugi's mallets are of the highest quality, with custom grip, no less! Poor Tsubasa... I kinda like him too. Oh well...

Spanner

Well, this battle will be odd, if nothing else. Tsubasa's chosen fighting strategy usually consists of running at his opponents while wearing large and heavy costumes, presumably with the intent of crushing them. His fighting skill is almost nil, and he does as well as he does through sheer pigheaded determination. Gosunguki, on the other hand, actually does have some skills at his disposal, various voodoo tricks, as well as his wooden mallet and nails. Unfortunately, his tricks tend to backfire, when they work at all. He doesn't have anywhere near Tsubasa's determination, and has to put up with a frail and weak body, besides. Tsubasa may be many things, but he is not out of shape (it takes some strength, at least, to batter people with those heavy costumes). Tsubasa is very likely to wear him down given time (and lots of disposable costumes), unless Gosunguki manages to get lucky with his black magic, and actually do something harmful to him. So, I'd guess Tsubasa will be the victor.

Chibi Lynn

Hmmm. Clash of the wierdos. This oughta be interesting. Well, if you ask me,I say that Tsubasa'll win. Why, do you ask? \par First off, Gosunkugi SUCKS with his Voodoo abilities, so his attacks are limited. But Tsubasa, however,is bound to do a whole heck of a lot better than he usually does since 'Voodoo \par Boy' scared off his beloved Ukyo,and he'll probably use his best disguises to knock his opponent of track,like disguising as Akane for instance.

Otakusama

Tsubasa's quick thinking and disguise ability will simply spook the bejezus out of Gosunkugi. (That is if the little pervert knows what a weirdo Gosun is!) And if all else fails, Tsubasa could reveal his true identity, but gosun might not be able to take it. Hey, at least Ranma has an EXCUSE for wearing women's clothing at times!!!!

Brian

I'm going with everybody's favorite little stalker here. Tsubasa has shown persistance, determination, and most importantly endurance in his quest to get Ukyo. Gosunkugi, while an intrigung cahracter, is beyond all other things a pessimist who doesn't think he can win. Tsubasa all the way.

Nagami

Well....I can't really say why, because I've never seen either in combat before. But I'm going to say that Tsubasa would win, simply because he seems like the stronger of the two, and less the coward. Gosunkugi comes off as a coward most of the time, and participates in battles behind the scenes, plotting with his voodoo, or what ever.

Derek G. Denny

Going strictly by the comics, Gosunkugi is not much of a fighter. He even admits it, during the 'Ranma and Juliet' story arc in Ranma 1/2 Part Four (U.S. Release). Tsubasa, on the other hand, was even able to hit Ranma, when Ranma grabbed onto him (he saw a cat), and when Ranma grabbed his shirt. Another point, Tsubasa had started liking Ukyo when they were both attending a Boys' school, so Tsubasa would have to have been really tough to ignore the (probable) constant ribbing he got from the other boys at the school (unless they were all like that). And what's Gosunkugi going to do with his little mallet, that Tsubasa couldn't do (and do better) by disguising himself as, say, a mailbox. This one's obvious: Tsubasa gets the nod in this one.

Eimi Yoshikawa

Tsubasa has demonstrated at least some minor skill in combat(he attacked Ranma when they first met). Gosunkugi, on the other hand, seems to rely only on his attempts at magic(although he did attack the thugs in Like Water for Ranma). Tsubasa has also shown significant persistance when chasing Ukyo, and has built up some stamina Breaking Point Style from Ukyo's beatings.

Dave Campbell

Tsubasa's only attacks are donning a big disguise and charging stuff. Puh-lease! Gosunkugi knows Voodoo. He doesn't even have to touch Tsubasa to kill him! I bet that if Gosunkugi practiced his dark magic a lot, he could be a whole lot of trouble. Currently he's only Kuno's sidekick.

Gaijin D

They're both fantastically low on the combat scale. Hell, I could probably take 'em both. Between the two of them, however, I think poor Gos-kun is the bigger wuss. I've never seen him succeed at so much as scratching anyone, while Tsubasa was able to give male Ranma a few lumps. Admittedly, Ranma'd just been scared witless by a pack of cats and wasn't able to defend himself. And he did recover quite easily. But, frankly, I doubt Gosunkugi could make a mark on everyone's favorite sex-changing martial artist if Ranma held out his chin and gave Gos a free shot. As for endurance, I've never seen Gos being seriously attacked, rather punted into LEO if anything, so I can't comment on his staying power. Doesn't look too tough, though. Tsubasa has time and again shown the cockroach like ability to take beatings from both Ranma and Ukyo and be back annoying them a minute later. Lastly, Tsubasa is actually quite agressive ("Charge!"), while Gosunkugi is generaly cowardly and prone to trying to avoid fights, knowing full well he's more than likely to lose. I have to say, though, Tsubasa is a whole lot more annoying. Gos is a lot easier to ignore.

Muumuu2

Though Tsubasa my look like a girl he does have the strength of a man where as Gosunkugi looks like a man but has the strength of a woman. Not to mentoin Tsubasa at least has some form of training in what ever martial art that disguise thing is.

HexxJo

Even though he's a guy, Tsubasa is still cute. Anyway, Gosunkugi looks like he hasn't slept in about 3 years, so he probably will pass out from exhaustion or something along those lines...

Tatewaki

Ha, Gosunkugi would win easy. He's my favorite Ranma character plus he's loaded with weapons. Remember in the manga when, during Romeo and Juliet, he threatened to kill Akane after knocking her out with chloroform and ranma took him seriously? Anime, grumble, stupid Sasuke.

DTCX

I think Gosunkugi'll win. Despite his geeky-ass appearance, Gosunkugi's the kind of guy who's not afraid of any challenge and has great determine, and THAT is what scares me. Tsubasa, on the other hand, doesn't really look like he's got a chance...I mean, here you have a guy who dresses like a girl. (What the hell is his problem?) Gusunkugi'll whoop Tsubasa's ass any day of the week. Thank you (^_^)

The Fight:

Time seemed to stand still for a moment as the two combattants sized each other up. Suddenly, Gosunkugi's hand emerged from his school bag wielding a viscious looking mallet. He raised the mallet high into the air above his head, but before he could strike, Tsubasa said, "Wait just a second."

Tsubasa turned around and started jogging off just in time to avoid the downward swing of the mallet. Gosunkugi looked on with puzzlement as his opponent jogged out of the park and out of view. He breathed a sigh of relief, and said, "Wow, that was easy. Well, back to work." He picked up his camera and started heading off toward another well secluded tree.

Before he could reach his destination, however, he heard heavy footfalls from behind him. He turned around and was quite surprised to see a large metal mailbox hopping across the ground toward him shouting, "CHARGE!"

Hikaru said to himself, "That's odd... I don't remember doing anything to upset a mailbox lately." He scratched the side of his head and thought about it a moment. This, however, was not the appropriate time to be thinking about such things. The mailbox landed on him and crushed him into the ground.

While Gosunkugi twitched on the ground, barely conscious, the mailbox rose to its 'feet.' Tsubasa's voice shouted from within the mailbox, "The final blow!" The large postal receptical jumped high into the air, and began to descend quickly toward the prone Hikaru.

Gosunkugi finally came to his senses again, not knowing that Tsubasa was plummeting down toward him. He looked around him and saw Akane walking through the park. He said, "Oh no, I'm going to miss my chance!" He got up and moved over to grab his camera a split second before Tsubasa could crush him.

The mailbox disguise was in pretty bad shape from the impact, and Tsubasa crawled out of it, quite dizzy. Hikaru looked over his shoulder upon hearing the noise, and said, "It was her in there? I'd better knock her out before she interferes with my picture taking." He reached into his school bag and pulled out his candles, affixing them to his head with his white headband. He walked over and pulled a hair from the still disoriented Tsubasa's head, and put it on one of his straw voodoo dolls.

Tsubasa's world came back into focus as Gosunkugi was preparing to drive a spike though the doll's leg. Tsubasa growled, "This is no time to be playing with dolls... I'm going to make you pay for ruining my date with Ukyou!"

Gosunkugi grinned, and said, "You won't be able to do anything after I do this..." He drive the spike through the doll's leg, and watched Tsubasa for any reaction. Unfortunately for him, there was none, except for Tsubasa's increasing anger.

Tsubasa growled and charged in, delivering several slaps to Hikaru's face. Through some miracle, the poor voodoo practicioner was able to launch a counter attack. He struck out with his hammer and nail, but Tsubasa merely sidestepped the attack. Gosunkugi lost his balance, having put all his energy into the one attack, and fell over, his head passing under his opponent's arm. This in itself would seem insignificant, but Gosunkugi was still wearing the candles on his head.

Tsubasa began to dance around franticallly as the purple and while sailor-style dress caught on fire. Gosunkugi looked up and saw the Tsubasa drop to the ground and roll. As his opponent stood up again, the tattered dress fell to the ground, revealing a long haired young man wearing a white tank top and a pair of boxers.

Tsubasa noticed Gosunkugi's surprised stare, and said, "What's the matter, never seen a real guy before?" The cross-dresser boy clenched his fist and said, "Not only did you chase Ukyou off, but you ruined my favorite dress. You're going to pay..."

Hikaru Gosunkugi stood up and looked around. He turned and looked at Tsubasa with rage in his eyes, and said, "Akane's gone...You made me miss my chance to take pictures of her. You're the one who's going to pay." He charges at his opponent and threw the hardest punch he could muster at Tsubasa's jaw.

Tsubasa looked at Hikaru with a bored expression as the punch found its make and proceeded to do no damage whatsoever. Tsubasa hoisted Gosunkugi off of the ground by his throat, and then slammed his head into the ground. He said, "Wait there just a minute." And walked off again.

The poor Gosunkugi was laying on the ground in a daze once again. As he started to shake off the blow and his vision returned to him, he saw a vending machine approaching at rapid speeds. He turned and started to run away, but a pair of beverage cans shot out of the machine and struck him in the back of his knees, sending him to the ground.

Tsubasa once again shouted, "CHARGE!" All that Hikaru could do was cower on the ground as the vending macine jumped up into the air and landed on him. Tsubasa climbed out of the comstume and posed triumphantly, seeing only Gosunkugi's hand sticking out from under the machine in the typical sign of surprise and warding.

Tsubasa looked up at the sky and said, "Oh, my dearest Ukyou... Once I've repaired all of my costumes we can finally be together at long last."

The Results:

Tsubasa Kurenai: 58

Hikaru Gosunkugi: 18

I know, I know... It's been a good few months since I've updated the page. I'm sorry, but college can be a killer on one's schedule ^_^ Thanks to everyone who voted over the long period of time, and actually had the patience to come back and check the results. ^_^