SO-CALLED HAFFU
What makes a "real" Italian? Can you tell who the "real" Italians are in this picture? This show, we deal with the issue of "haffu" and the issues that they encounter in Japanese society.
February 16, 2000
"The Children of International Marriages"
Do you like Japanese girls? This is probably the third most frequently asked question of me by Japanese people behind "Can you eat natto?" and "Do you have a gun?" (I'm from New York City). The answer is well, I like women, and if the woman is attractive, interesting and a Roberto Baggio fan, then they stand a chance, regardless of country of origin. Thus, the longer I am in Japan, I would assume that the odds are great that I will marry a Japanese and have children. This program poses the question of whether or not this is fair to the children, to bring a child into an environment that treats them as "half" of a Japanese.
The guest panel is comprised of children of international couples, all of whom had stories to tell of being teased, bullied and dealing with various issues of identity and cultural clash. There was one young woman on the panel who holds the theory that for an international couple to give birth to a child in Japan is a selfish choice, not taking into account the trials and tribulations that they will likely go through in this society.
Exactly what difficulties do haffu (the Japanese word for "half-Japanese") go through in Japan? Well, there is already a very deeply ingrained status quo amongst Japanese youth and those who divert from the middle and stand out tend to be picked on and bullied. This is the case with Japanese kids as well, but is even more so the case with haffu. Facial features may be different, their upbringings may lead to a slightly different way of doing things and their level of Japanese and/or other languages may be different than the children around them. Then throw into play the internal battle of defining who they are. I can relate to this in a sense, as an Italian-American. My parents are both Italian-American, but my upbringing was less "Italian" than the average "Italian-American." I can't speak the language, I didn't live in a neighborhood with many other Italians and I always knew very little about Italy. In high school, I used to be teased by the other Italian-Americans on the football team, who called me "Ragu", which is the name for a watered-down spaghetti sauce in America. I can laugh about it now, but at the time, it hurt. In college, I encountered many other people with similar experiences. But upon coming to Japan, I realized that the environment here is not nearly as conducive to constructing your "self" as it was for me in the States.
OK, so there are some of the negatives. But that's certainly not where the buck stops. I mean, take international marriages themselves. To say that they are easy would be rediculous. To put it coldly, it is kind of like a merger of two mega-companies, like a Time Warner and AOL. They each have so much to offer, but to make them work as one will take a rigorous sifting-out process that may result in thousands of layoffs. Won't be easy, but if pulled off successfully, it will produce a synergy much greater than than the two parts independent of each other. I think that the challenge behind pulling off international marriages is an incredibly challenging proposition which can offer a stimulating experience for the rest of your life. Not that marrying someone of a similar background to you won't result in the same, but the possibility of learning about someone from a completely different "world" than me certainly piques my interest.
It's just that if you are to bring a child into this environment, you had better be ready to deal with the sifting-out process. What will you do about their education, their religion, their language study, their knowledge of their culture and ancestors? That's just the tip of the iceberg. Not impossible issues to deal with, but it does require give and take. You absolutlely must instill pride in these children, or else they will not be able to handle the challenges that they will face about their identity in Japan, by their classmates, community and society at-large. I have only felt true pride in being Italian-American in the past few years and am currenly studying Italian in an effort to communicate better with my relatives in Italy.
As the foreigner population increases in Japan, these issues will become pervasive in Japanese society. Hopefully, this will lead to increased understanding and accpetance of different cultures and backgrounds. It will be international couples and their children that will be on the forefront of this change.