The Dark, Twisted, Grotesque, Violent and Generally Perverse Adventures of the Sailor Scouts!


by Mark Latus (who needed a break from all those depressing and dead serious 
               SM stories)

"Distrust all in whom the urge to punish is powerful" - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche, "Thus Spake Zarathustra" "In the name of the moon I will punish you!" - Sailor Moon, "any episode" "Uhm, there's nothing in the story relating to those quotes" - Nitpicking proof reader "Shut the f*** up! It's artistic license!" - Mark Latus "Mr. Latus your artistic license will expire on 09/30/96. Please submit the renewal fee to this agency ..." - Excerpt of letter from Arts Council of Canada It was a day much like any other in Tokyo. Apart from most of the population mysteriously acquiring English names and a wide variety of accents life proceeded much as it always had. Which, of course, meant demonic creatures from the dreaded Negaverse were showing up with alarming frequency. It made the old timers long for the good old days when all you had to worry about were giant monsters walking through the city every few months. But this day would not remain so peaceful. For the champions of justice known as the Sailor Scouts it would be a day like no other. Before it ended they would have suffered in ways they could never imagined! Their sweet virginal bodies would be violated in ways that would sicken many sadists! Blood would stain their once white uniforms as their hideous fate befell them! Clawed hands would seize their pert young breasts and ... sorry I'm getting a bit worked up. I need to rest for a few minutes. [Automatic Writing Mode Engaged] IMB Clone Fanfic Writer version 3.1 activated Now operational. Reviewing text. Oh dear, this is never going to work. Looks like another massive rewrite job. What? You didn't think he wrote all this stuff by himself did you. He just comes up with a concept and I have to fill in all the details. When he does try to write himself it takes forever which is why that lousy BGC fic is now six months overdue. Frankly I'm getting worried by the organic component of this team. Any adult male who devotes so much of his time to an obsession over a cartoon about underdressed and underaged girls should be viewed with extreme suspicion. Damn, he's coming back to mess with the story. Wonder if I should erase this text? No. He never bothers proofreading and doesn't listen to the folks who do. Better just set the scene. Fade in on the interior of the unnamed soda shop the Scouts are always hanging around in. Present are Serena, Raye, Mina Lita and Amy. Luna and Artemis are conspicuously absent. Interpret that however you'd like. [Automatic Writing Mode Entering Silent Running] Raye was attempting to attract the others attention. "I am having premonitions of doom. STOP IGNORING ME DAMNIT!" Amy shrugged. "Raye, you're always having premonitions of doom! If any of them were worth anything we'd be able to stop the badguys before they strike. As it is you get about a three second lead on the evening news. Raye picked up her soda and muttered about how Amy would regret that remark when she got anally raped by the Overfiend sometime this afternoon. Nothing left in the glass and the waiter, a man with short blond hair and a familiar looking purple uniform, was ignoring them. Being the short tempered member of the group (this being her other defining characteristic) she considered bouncing the empty glass off his head. Meanwhile the others continued sorting through the pile of papers on the table. For a change Raye had been the last to arrive so she had no idea what they were doing. When she'd asked she'd been told a proper psychic should already know. She was not amused. In a booth not far away an unhappy foursome was running through a list of changes. They'd been dragged into this fanfic at the last minute and were feeling surly about losing a day off. The greenhaired teenage girl was muttering and idly carving her initials into the table with a knife her brother had materialized. He was studying a script and looking unhappy. The stacked bluehaired women was studying waiter intently and trying to ignore the overweight man wearing the startrek t-shirt by her side. It seemed her boyfriend was a lot geekier in this universe. The greenhaired man put down the script and scowled. "What kind of a name is Calflyte anyway? I wouldn't have lasted a day in the Dark Kingdom with a name like that." "Negaverse. This is the DiC World. Everything's from the Negaverse around here. Look on the bright side, none of us shifted genders." "Yeah, yeah. Why the hell are we even here?' "It's a very bad injoke. I imagine the scene'll shift back to the Senshi ...uhh the Scouts any second now. Say does that waiter look familiar to you?" Meanwhile Raye had finally attracted the waiter's attention. She didn't react when he walked over to the table except to study the menu. Which didn't say much about about either her psychic abilities or her memory. "Ok, I'll have another soda and maybe ..." Serena looked around, "Hey I'll have another soda too." "Me too." "Likewise." "Same here." The waiter chuckled. "You should have chosen something better for your last meal fools!" "Huh?" "You still don't recognise me?" He tossed the sodashop cap away. Past experience had shown the Scouts could never recognise him if he wore a hat despite getting a good look at him when he was working at Raye's shrine. "It's your archenemy Jedite! I have returned to ..." The fireball engulfed his head and his hair ignited. A moment later his eyes melted and superheated steam exploded out his nose, eyesockets, ears and mouth as his brain's watercontent boiled. His skin crisped and burned away leaving a bare skull. Basically all the effects you'd get from sticking someone's head in a blastfurnace. Kids don't try this at home! Raye was a little surprised at this as she was still just recognising him and hadn't transformed yet. The bluehaired woman who'd thrown the fireball growled, "That's for never remembering my birthday Dad!" Beside her Calflyte kept muttering the words "low profile" over and over again like a mantra. Serena looked down at the smoking corpse and went ewh! "Hey! You just killed that guy." Azurcite shrugged. "He was Jedite, he was evil. Besides the service here is terrible! This seemed a more effective way to register a protest than not leaving a tip." Serena considered, Jedite had indeed been a lousy waiter. Still ... "Well you can't just run around killing people. That's our job!" Mina, Raye and Lita groaned while Amy kept stage whispering the words, "secret identity". The woman smiled and said, "It's okay, really." She touched her bracelet and her clothing melted then reformed. She was now wearing a typical Sailor Scout costume except that it was mainly black leather, a lot lower cut in front, included a spiked collar and wristbands, stiletto heeled boots ... actually it was a fairly atypical scout costume. Though if they had all dressed like that perhaps they'd still be on the air. She did a quick spin round for a gratuitous panty shot then struck a dramatic pose. "I am Sailor uh ..." What was that her codename? There were urgent whispers from her table. "Andromeda?" "Alpha Centuri?" "Gallifrey?" "I am Sailor ... Tau Ceti (I think). As a Sailor Scout I am allowed to kill sentient lifeforms without legal consequences or moral guilt whenever I want." "Oh. Well that's ok then." Serena sat down again, pity she'd been rather looking forward to a good fight. Having just demonstrated his encyclopedic knowledge of Serena's character the writer decided to switch the scene back to the Scouts before the injoke took over the story. Raye looked down at the corpse which had begun the standard "crumple to dust then vanish" routine. "Well, guess somebody has to go to the counter to order now." "I'll do it." Mina's volunteering surprised everyone as she usually did her best to duck out of work. However Mina had realized that Serena already had the lazy, ditzy role defined leaving her without a character. As her Sailor V past had been retroactively erased she no longer had anything to distinguish her from Serena apart from her hairstyle. She needed some unique characteristics to keep from blending into the background. Ami had the quiet studious role taken, Lita was the tough girl with the heart of gold, Raye was the temperamental psychic and Serena was almost a clone of her. But she'd got on the air first. So Mina was going to try being the good natured, bubbly helpful one who gets treated like a doormat and taken for granted. Not what she'd have preferred but it was better than nothing. The guy behind the counter didn't seem too concerned about his only waiter going down in flames. These days in Tokyo you have to get used to new staff potentially being energy sucking parasites. Besides Negaversites work for less than minimum wage and don't expect a health plan. Unfortunately they don't tend to last long before someone dusts them. "What'll it be, Miss?" "Five generic sodas." "Green or Blue?" "I'm not sure. Say what's in this stuff anyway?" "I've never asked." He paused. "I do have one new soda that I do know the ingredients to. Jedite brought it in as part of his revenge plan." He held up a glass of something pink. "What flavour is it?" "Human." Mina gagged. "At least I think it was human. It was kinda hard to tell with her." "Her? Who's in there?" "Chibi-Usa." "Who?" "Sorry I forgot. Rini." "Rini!" "Yeah, Jedite grabbed her as part of his revenge plan. He melted her down into a puddle of pink goo and added carbonated water. Result is this." "Uhm, how does it taste?" "Excessively sweet and it's very bad for your mental and physical health." That figured. Mina thought about this. No more Rini. The pink abomination was reduced to a high calorie softdrink. Jedite hadn't been such a bad guy after all. It was obviously a crime against nature allowing Serena to breed. Perhaps she could persuade Darrien to get a vasectomy. In the meantime drinking this stuff would be cannibalism. She thought about this and smiled. She could be the cheerful, helpful one with a hidden nasty streak. That would give her plenty of character. "I'll take five glasses of the pink stuff." Mina returned with five glasses of fairly ghastly soda. Raye thought it was terrible but Mina was paying so she wasn't about to throw away a free drink. "OK, I want to know what's with all the paperwork on this table. And don't tell me it's Serena's manga." The other four stared at Raye in shock. Amy hissed, "Comics, say 'Serena's comics'! You know we aren't allowed to use Japanese." Raye remembered the penalties for violating the ethnic remarks statues and went pale. "Sorry. Slip of the tongue. It'll never happen again." "I hope not. Anyway to answer your question these are the scripts for our next adventure." "Since when do we get scripts?" "Since the writer decided to do one of those dark, serious Sailor Moon stories." "Serious? How serious can you make us? Sure there's an edge to some of it but this ain't Wicked City. We're a cartoon about cute, underdressed girls who fight monsters dumb enough not to attack until we've finished making speeches. How do you make that serious?" "Ignore the parts of the show that'd contradict you and throw in plenty of serious drama." "Namely heaps of sex and violence?" "That's what most of it amounts too." "Great!" Lita picked up another script, it was about 15 pages long. "Look let's get on with it or we'll be here all day." She glanced through it. "Hey Raye, you star in this one." "Really? Great! Wait a second, what happens?" "Well on page one a dimensional gateway opens and tentacles try to pull Serena in. You heroically break her free but get sucked into the gateway and land in a place full of creatures with lots of tentacles and a thing for schoolgirls." Lita flipped past the next fourteen pages. "And you wind up orgasming to death." "That's it? That's the entire story?" "Pretty much. Oh it starts off rape but by page nine you're actively participating." "Jesus. Who wrote this? The sicko who did those Gor books?" "Could be, he's using a psuedonym." Raye grabbed the script and tore it in half. "Look I'm getting sick of being portrayed as a masochist. Do you really think I want to be stripped naked, rubbed in oil, strapped to a rack, have alligator clips attached to my ..." She realized everyone was staring at her and coughed. "Well anyway, I'm not doing that one." Something occurred to her, "Just how do you die by orgasm?" "Doesn't say how. Just says you do." Mina looked back at the script she'd been studying. "This one's got possibilities. Amy gets bitten by a werewolf and becomes a Werewolf Scout. Her repressed sexuality goes out of control and she jumps the werewolf, Darien, Lita ..." "WHOA, TIME OUT!" Lita didn't look happy. "I don't care what fanfic canon is, I am neither lesbian or bisexual!" "You are if they write you that way." Lita sighed, "Man, I hate being fictional! Every story I get written with a different sexuality. I've been straight, gay, bi and had an affinity for Llamas. What next?" Mina decided she really didn't want to ask about the last one. "Well anyway ..." "Look if we have to do that one couldn't we change it from me to the Outer Scouts? They're into that stuff." Mina considered. "I guess the readers might prefer a threesome. Maybe a rewrite's in order." Serena frowned. "Who the heck are the Outer Scouts?" Ami used her computer to link to the Hitoshi Doi homepage and gave it to Serena. "They're from the next series which DiC hasn't brought over. And probably never will now. Sailors Uranus and Neptune." "Oh. Hey these names are way to ethnic. They'll have to be changed to fit in around here." Raye nodded. "Sounds fair. We all had to get new names or new spellings, why should they be exempt." Serena nodded. "Absolutely. So we need new first and last names." Ami shook her head. "No, we'll just need one family name." "Why?" "Because the only way they'll be allowed into this universe is as sisters. Otherwise they're too close for comfort." "Are you sure Amy?" "Look if they won't even let us drink coffee they definitely won't let lesbians exist." Everyone nodded and Mina tossed the script as incest would be pushing it. "Next?" "We brutally murder Mr. Rogers and kill everyone in his neighbourhood." "Next!" Raye flipped one open. "OK in this one a thinly disguised author avatar arrives with a variety of powers and winds up with us as his personal harem." They all broke out laughing. "Jesus, what a sad case." "Get a life." "Hahahahahaha ...." Once they'd stopped giggling they moved on. "Ok in this one we all get ripped apart by a monster." "And?" "That's it." "That's it?" "Forget it. Next?" "Another crossover with another series. The other characters are mangled trying to fit them into our world." Lita snorted. "Crossovers never work. If it's an SF series then you have to muddle everything to have high tech and magic coexist. If it's fantasy then you wind up with a mishmash of two or three independent rules of magic and probably several working religions with supreme beings." "Hey I like the crossovers!" Raye sounded belligerant. "Come on, they're all crap!" "I've seen several good ones!" "Yeah right, like you're any judge." "Those are fighting words." "Oh yeah?" "Yeah!" Raye and Lita glared at each other and reached for their transformation pens. Before this could become a flame war, or rather a flame and lightning war, Amy tossed the script. "Let's stick to our own universe for this story and forget the crossover issue." They muttered a bit but nodded. Why complicate things further. Though Lita did whisper to Raye, "What crossovers did you like anyway?" "None of your damn business!" "Geez, that's your answer to everything." Serena climbed back from under the table (where {she would like to make it perfectly clear} she hadn't been hiding but merely looking for a coin she'd dropped) and dusted herself off. "I saw we ditch all the scripts that are just gratuitous sex and violence." Everybody agreed and Ami scanned the script pile with her computer. Then she pushed 90% of them off the table. "Well these ones aren't gratuitously violent. They just make our lives hell and put us through the emotional wringer." Mina sighed. "Well that's just great. Can't we just be cute, same as always?" "Sorry, orders are do a serious type fanfic." Serena picked up the nearest script. Let's see, 'Pulp Moon' ..." She skimmed through it. "... we confront two hitman and while we're doing our intro speeches they shoot us all in the head. That's not gratuitous violence?" Ami frowned. "Funny, I've programmed my visor with profession critic parameters. Wonder how it missed this one. Although those hitman do have a certain wit." "Come on, Look at this dialogue; 'Does Queen Beryl look like a bitch?' 'Yes.' 'Oh yeah, she does, don't she. Take over Vinnie.' "Next!" Ami looked back at the script she'd picked up. "I think this one has definite possibilites. The title's 'Childhood's End'. Let's check out the ending ... [Activating grim, gritty mode. Think Frank Miller thoughts] Sailor Moon gazed down at the sprawled figure who'd called herself Mistress Nine. Her enemy stared back with pure malice. She snarled, "You may have closed the gate but it's not over yet. I'll open another one. Pharaoh 90 will bring silence to this world yet!" Serena didn't answer. She simply reached down and pulled the limp body upright. Mistress Nine's look of frustrated rage changed to confusion. It was becoming panic as Serena slung the woman over her shoulder and stalked down the battle damaged corridors of Infinity Academy. "I can't move!. What have you done to me?" The panic had spread to Mistress Nine's voice. Serena answered in an emotionless monotone. "My tiara hit you between the first and second cervical vertebrae. Not hard enough to kill you, just hard enough to paralyse you from the neck down. I asked Amy the best way to cripple someone on our way over." She turned right as Mistress Nine began screaming. When she'd merged with Hannah Tomoe she'd become fused to this body. She was trapped in this crippled form for the rest of her life. Serena pushed open the double doors and nodded in satisfaction. The school's pool was still full. The flooring was cracked, the roof was gone and the water was full of debris but the pool itself was intact. She eased the screaming woman from her shoulder and slid her into the pool's shallow end. Mistress Nine became aware of her surroundings. She tilted her head to look up at Sailor Moon. "What are you doing?" Serena knelt down on the pool's edge and placed a hand on her enemy's head. In the same monotone she said, "Drowning you." "WHAT!" "I was going to let you live out your life as a cripple. But I thought it over and that's just not enough after all you've done." "WAIT! Kill me and you kill Hannah Tomoe as well!" Sailor Moon nodded. "That's the minor reason for doing this. Her spirit's trapped in that body with you. She deserves better than that. This is the only release I can give her." "NO! You can't do this!" Mistress Nine felt the hand grip her short hair in a grip of iron. Ignoring the pain she screamed, "WHY? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!!" Serena leaned down so she could whisper in the paralysed woman's ear. "Because I hate you." Her arm straightened and forced the head underwater. She ignored the frantic thrashing as Mistress Nine tried to wriggle her head free from Serena's grip. Even if she did it wouldn't do her much good as nothing below her neck worked. Serena watched the bubbles rising and felt her victim's struggles become more frantic. After two minutes there was a large bubble as Mistress Nine's lungs expelled their stored air and sucked in water. The struggles lessened and ceased. She didn't relax her grip. Five minutes passed. After ten she released the hair she'd held so tightly and rose. She stared into the pool for a moment then spat in the water. She was walking away when she heard movement in the corridor. Sailor Neptune limped in, "Sailor Moon? I've been looking for you." Serena nodded curtly. "You found me." That definitely didn't sound like the bubbly girl she'd come to know. Well they'd all been through a lot. None of the survivors had much in the way of innocence left. "I've finished mopping up. It's all over." "Not quite." Sailor Moon reached up and pulled the sceptre from nowhere. At least nowhere visible to anyone else. She pointed it at the pool, Neptune could see something floating ... "MOON HEALING ANNIHILATION!" The object exploded as the beam hit it and the pool erupted in a spray of red tinged water. Sailor Moon lowered her arm and the sceptre vanished. "Now it's over." Her tone was final. Neptune nodded and lead her back to the main lobby. Amy looked up as they arrived. She had an open first aid kit at her feet and was finishing dressing the wound on her arm. "Serena, are you all right?" "I don't know." She glanced around the shattered hall. "Where's Pluto?" "She vanished after the portal disappeared. Said the timeline was broken and we'd have to make our own destiny from now on." Sailor Moon sighed. "So it's just the three of us left to defend the world. It'll have to be enough." Neptune nodded. "We'll survive. United there's nothing we can't do." She took Serena's hand Amy nodded and placed her hand on top of Serena's and Michele's. "Until the end of the world." Serena sighed, "That's what I'm afraid of." End "Wow, real intense! But who's Hannah?" Amy put the script down and turned to Lita. "I guess it's the americanized version of Hotaru aka Sailor Saturn. And right at the end Michele must be Michiru, Sailor Neptune." Serena was looking puzzled (what else is new), "Who the heck is Mistress Nine and what was all that about?" "Read the Sailor Moon S synopsis." "Okely Dokely" While Serena scanned through the webpages again Lita asked, "Three left? What happened to the rest of us?" Amy flipped back. "Let's see, Uranus dies during the assault on the Academy, you and Raye get killed by diamons (whatever exactly they are) earlier on and Mina ..." She stopped at a page and read it quickly with a look of distaste. "My that's nasty. No wonder Serena went over the edge." "Give me that!" Mina snatched the script and quickly read through it. Then she turned very pale. "No way. Forget it. We are not doing that one." "Come on. Be a sport." "Not a chance!" While all this was going on the TV behind the bar continued to burble on. On the screen a reporter interviewed Rubeus in front of the smoking remains of the white house. "So you see, Nancy, it occurred to me that I didn't have to keep messing with Tokyo. All I had to do to destroy the timeline was do something that wasn't in the history books." "So you blew up the White House?" "That's right. And I'd like to thank the makers of 'Independance Day' for the inspiration. Credit where credit is due." There was a beep, Reubus frowned and pulled out a small device. At his touch it hummed and projected an image of Wiseman. "Rubeus if you are hearing this message than you have succeeded in your mission." Rubeus grinned. "Of course you have also destroyed your personal timeline as well ..." "WHAT?" "In the new timeline if there is a Rubeus he will have no contact with Crystal Tokyo, as it never existed, and so be a different person from you ..." "Wait a minute!" "We'd like to thank you for your efforts even if we don't remember them as they didn't happen in our timeline. Enclosed in this box is a medal for first degree chronocide." The box unsealed. "PS you're safe as long as you stay in your new space/time location but if you use the time machine paradox forces will erase you from existence." Rubeus looked straight at the camera. "Doh!" "Another victim of temporal mechanics. Back to you in the studio, Janice." "Thank you, Nancy. FOX pictures issued a statement denying their movie is responsible for inspiring marauding aliens to blow up the White House. However they are still being sued by everyone who had relatives in the White House at the time. In a related story the destruction of the White House and loss of the President is being cheered by both the Republican and Democratic Parties." Unnoticed by the counterman the Rini soda cannister blinked out of existence as the time paradox erased it. At the table Raye frowned at her empty glass. She'd been sure she hadn't drunk the whole thing, also she suddenly felt thirsty again. "So what's the next possibility?" Mina slapped a script on the table. "This one's called 'Collateral Damage', it could be a real heartbreaker." Serena groaned, "Great, that means I die or Rini does!" "Who?" "Uhh you know ... that thing that was always hanging around annoying me." "Darien?" "No you idiot the ... you know ... thingy ..." She trailed off uncertainly. "What are you talking about?" "I forget. So what's the story?" "OK we have a fight with some generic type monsters. We're wasting them without much trouble but this little kid wanders into the area. When you're using the Moon Sceptre on the boss monster the kid gets caught in the blast and dies. You fall apart and we all try to tell you it's not your fault. Then you announce you'll use the crystal to bring him back. We try to talk you out of it as that'll kill you. You refuse to listen and then put up a forceshield around yourself when we try to stop you. Let's pick up from there ... Serena felt the first wave of weakness strike her. The crystal could do almost anything the wielder desired, even raise the dead, but it had a price. She could feel it draining her lifeforce even as her gaze shifted from the world around her to the spirit realm. She could see it overlaying the material world. There was a white humanoid form huddled next to the child's broken body. It seemed to be trying to hang on to it but something was pulling it away. It wailed in fear as the ghost wind tugged at it. So this was what a soul looked like. Were they all this bright or was that only how the innocent looked? He was losing his grip on his body and screaming in fear. Then he seemed to see her and gazed in awe. Perhaps he thought he saw an angel. The wind seemed to cease and he stood staring at her. Caught somewhere between fear and worship he stood frozen. Serena ignored the growing weariness and reached out to him. "Don't be afraid." For a moment he flinched away. Then, shyly, he reached his ghostly hand towards her flesh and blood one. Serena could see almost nothing of the material world now. Their fingers were about to touch. Faintly she heard a cry of, "mars fire ignite" but the whisper meant nothing to her. Then everything seemed to explode into light. The silent explosion flung the child away and the spirit world blinked out. The energy of the Silver Crystal whipped around seeking the object it had focused on. Not finding it the power fed back into Serena's body. Her strength and normal vision returned and again she saw the others through the haze of the forceshield she'd raised. The boy's body was gone. The breeze was already dispersing the ash that remained. In a flash of realization she knew what had happened. With the body gone there was nothing to return the child to. Contact had been broken by its destruction. Which meant ... "RAYE! What have you done?" It wasn't possible. How could Raye betray her like this? Her shield blinked out as grief overwhelmed her. There were tears in Raye's eyes but she stood tall and proud. "I did what I had to. Serena you're too important to sacrifice yourself over a child. Even, god help me, over a hundred children. Too important to the world but I'd be lying if I said that was my main reason. You're too important to me for me to let you throw your life away." "Serena it wasn't your fault he died. It was just a terrible accident. Throwing your life away to make amends is wrong." "I wasn't throwing it away. He'd be alive again right now if you hadn't interfered." "Serena, it had to be this way." Both of them were near tears now. Serena rallied herself to keep going. "He was just a child. His whole life was ahead of him. It wasn't fair!" "Life isn't fair Serena." Raye choked down a sob. "I know I've lost your friendship by doing this but I had to save you. Perhaps you'll understand that someday. And perhaps, just perhaps, someday you'll forgive me." Raye wiped her eyes and bowed. "I will always be there to protect you, my Princess." Then she turned and marched away. Serena watched Sailor Mars dwindle into the distance then turned to Ami, Lita and Mina. They stood clumped together and stared at the ground. "HOW COULD YOU LET HER DO THIS!", she screamed at them. "WHY DIDN'T YOU STOP HER?" They bowed their heads and turned away from her. That was when she knew that they'd all planned to do it. But Raye had been the fastest. Sailor Moon, Princess of the Moon, future Queen of Crystal Tokyo and wielder of the Silver Crystal slumped down in the dust and watched the last few ashes blow away. Then she started to sob and began to bawl like a child. Mourning the death of both innocence and friendship End. "Great. Well I feel like slitting my wrists now. This could get us stuck with a lot of lawsuits!" "Is there such a thing as fanfic inspired suicide?" Ami nodded. "Definitely a change from our usual upbeat stuff." Raye was scowlng. "Why do I get stuck being the heavy?" Serena was looking very unhappy. "Maybe we could cop out. Have that Sailor Pluto person show up and announce the kid would have been the next Hitler. Or do a scene with the kid's ghost showing up and forgiving everyone." "That spoils the whole point of the story?" "Which is?" "Life ain't fair. Shit happens." "Yeah right. Like anyone out there doesn't already know that. "Enough philosophy, let's see if we can find something serious but not depressing." "Good luck. Around here serious means depressing." Meanwhile over at the Dark King... the Negaversian Renegades' table Azurcite had just realized something. "Hey, I'm still wearing my scout costume." Calflyte looked apprehensive. "The writer must have forgotten about us. We'd better sneak out before he remembers about us and pulls some weird shit on us!" But it was too late for that. Suddenly the geekified Fyrite had a burst of inspiration. "Hey since this don't affect out regular continuity (or anything outside this story) how about I sleep with your sister?" Tyfranite slammed a punch into her cousin's stomach. As he doubled over she seized the back of his head and slammed his face into the table creating an indent. Then she pushed him back upright. "Yeah Ok, why not?" "What did you say Ty?" In case you're wondering that was Calflyte, Fyrite was now out of action. "I said sure. I'm sick of being the good girl type all the time." "Then why'd you beat him up?" "This is a serious story. It needs violence and sex. That was the former, I'll take care of the latter when he wakes up." With that Tyfranite seized her cousin's ankles and began hauling him away. There was a regular thumping as she dragged his back and head along the floor. "That's a radical change." Calfryte nodded, "I'll say. Say I hope she remembers to catch the door before ... " There came the crunch of a skull getting caught between swinging door and jamb. Both of them winced. "By the way Cal I found a serious script for the non-parody versions of us. 'Thy Kingdom Come'. It's a joke right?" "Afraid not. So don't do any spoilers." "Geez, that's all we need. But doesn't this make this whole story hypocritical?" "It would be if this was a bitter and vitriolic attack but it's more our author poking good natured fun at dark fics." "How do you know that." "It says so on my cue cards. Besides you can tell when he's getting nasty. He's got no subtlety." A bowling ball bounced off Calflyte's head. He groaned and muttered, "See what I mean!" There was an ominous shimmer in the air above him. "Which is not to say he's anything other than a first rate writer! I love all his stuff! He's great at plot and character!" The shimmer disappeared. Azurcite snorted "And like all the other fanfic writers he's very susceptible to flattery!" Calflyte glanced around apprehensively but nothing unpleasant happened. Azurcite coughed to regain his attention. "By the way Calflyte, you did know your hand's on my thigh?" "Really! Now when did that happen?" "About ten minutes ago." "Oh ... sorry." Pause "I suppose I should move it then." "Normally yes but since this story doesn't impact our regular continuity and as there's no sign of ..." She consulted the new names list, " ... uhm, Margarine ... well, why don't the two of us finally get it on?" Calflyte thought about the serious implications of this. At least for as long as the average guy is going to ponder the implications after being propositioned by a beautiful, underdressed and willing woman. It took him about ten seconds to dash to the cash register, toss money at the counterman, grab Azurcite and teleport to the nearest hotel. The author congratulated himself on cleverly phasing out the injoke while hopefully distracting readers from the fact he had no plot except the Scouts sitting around a soda shop complaining about life. What the hell, it worked in the sitcoms. Meanwhile the Scouts were still sorting through the script pile and grumbling that none of them were any good. Then Lita starting waving one. "Hey this one's sorta cool." "So what's it this time? Longlost relatives or reincarnations of them?" Raye was getting sick of wading through this crap. Maybe she'd been too hasty in ditching the naughty tentacle script. "It's call 'Moonlight Revenge'. And it's actually relevant to those quotes back at the start." "What? You mean, 'Shut the f...'" "NO! I mean the first two. Guess the proofreader gave up before he got this far." "Can't blame him, this things a godawful mess of grim stuff and bad jokes." "Quiet, you'll scare off the readers." "Good." Lita slammed a fist into the table. "EVERYONE SHUT UP OR I'LL KILL YOU ALL!" Sudden dead silence. "Good. Ok the idea is this, Serena intervenes in a mugging as Sailor Moon. This starts her on a crime fighting kick as the Negaverse is all quiet. I join up with her but the rest of you stay out of it, saying that's not why we have our powers. Anyway we start fighting nastier and more brutal criminals. Before long we're no longing beating them up and handing them over to the police. We start really hurting people, but no one who isn't scum. Then we start using the same methods we use on the negatrash. After all these people are as bad as them or even worse as they weren't born in a world which values evil. The rest of you agonize over the moral issues. Meanwhile we start getting lethal with lesser criminals and you finally decide we're out of control. So you set out to stop us ... The huntress eyed her city with a feeling of satisfaction. People could truly feel secure now that she was here protecting them. Why had it taken her so long to understand that she was ignoring her true responsibilities? No matter, she was doing what she had to now. If only the others would realize this. It was lonely with just her and Lita. She suppressed a yawn. Even Scouts need some sleep, they can't keep going forever. Time to call it a night. She was preparing to head home when she heard the scream. Instantly she looked for the source. With her Scout senses she could hear a pin drop a mile away. There! She launched herself towards the source. The man held a knife to the terrified woman's throat and chuckled. Then stopped and whirled to confront the figure who'd landed in the mouth of the alley. She silently chided herself for making a noisy entrance than planned as she spoke. "Guess you don't read the papers. There's a new kind of justice on the streets. It's name is Sailor Moon and I will punish you and all the others who prey on the innocent!" The man dropped his knife but faced her unafraid. Behind him his victim stood up. Light wrapped around both figures and their outlines shifted. Then the auras faded and Sailors Mars and Mercury faced her. Both held disguise pens. "Cute. You could have just called me on the communicator if you wanted to chat." No sign of Mina so this wasn't an ambush. "Serena, it's time to end this madness." "Raye's right. You're completely out of control." "We've already had this conversation. Our mission is to fight against evil. That doesn't end with monsters. Amy you're a lot smarter than me. You know that people have committed more terrible things on mankind than all the monsters of the Negaverse combined." "I ... can't deny that Serena. But this is wrong. You're abusing your powers! You're killing people." "I'm not killing anyone who doesn't deserve it. Hell, they're more deserving than the Negaslime. At least the Negaversians were born evil. These people chose to become scum. You didn't complain when we killed the Negatrash, why change your tune now?" "It was easy when they looked like monsters. I ... I don't know if I can kill anything anymore. But Serena this is wrong. The whole city's afraid of you!" "Only the guilty need to fear me ..." Raye broke in, "Meatball head you've totally lost your mind." "Crime is down 50% citywide ..." "Because everyone's terrified of you. You and Lita are both nuts!" Everyone had seen pictures of the bodies. Criminals caught in the act were turning up cut in half, electrocuted or almost totally vaporized. Serena had learned to be careful with the moon sceptre. Initially she'd used it to totally vaporize criminals until Lita pointed out that didn't leave anything as a warning. For all anyone knew the vaporizee might just have gone on vacation. So she'd learned to leave fingers or faces for identification purposes. Serena sighed. "Raye, both of you swore loyalty to me. Why are you betraying me like this? I am your Princess and you owe me fealty." "You're not the Serena I swore to always protect!" "I know I have changed but as Amy once told me life is change. You both know the future. You know that someday I will sit in judgement over the whole world. How can I do that if I stay the same airheaded crybaby I once was?" "Enough talking! Change back to plain old Serena, give me your locket and go home to a normal life!" "Or?" "Or we'll have to take it." Amy nodded decisively. Serena's eyes narrowed. "This is my birthright. No one but me will ever control it." Raye matched her glare. "Then it's war between us." She nodded slightly. "MERCURY BUBBLES!" The fog filled the alley and Amy activated her visor. She was now the only one who could see. She'd simply charge Serena, remove the locket and let her untransform. Perhaps someday she'd be under control and they could return it. But where was Serena? The only one she could see was Raye. She caught a glimpse of motion to her right then screamed in pain. As soon as Mercury shouted Serena had leapt backwards out of the alley. In midair she'd acted automatically. "MOON TIARA ACTION!" It surged forward, ricocheting from the alley's walls. As she landed she realized what she'd done. She was raising her hand to recall it when she heard the cry. The tiara flew from the alley and returned to her hand. It felt sticky. The fog within was thinning rapidly. Raye clutched a graze on her arm then saw the huddled form on the ground. Sailor Mercury lay sprawled in a growing puddle of red. "AMY!" She rushed to her friend's side. She pulled Amy onto her side and saw the gaping wound. Amy's features were slack and lifeless. Her eyes clouded and she began to weep. From behind her she heard, "I didn't mean to ... I just reacted ... she shouldn't have tried to stop me." Raye's grief exploded into rage. "You lousy bitch she died because she wanted to save you from yourself! I swear she's your last victim! "MARS FIRE IGNITE!" The fireball burned through the space Sailor Moon had occupied. Raye had a startled moment to wonder when she'd gotten so fast before the blur was on her. The moon sceptre had been designed as an energy weapon rather than a club but it served well enough. Raye's head seemed to explode. Then it flared again as something slammed it against the nearest alleywall. Raye's vision cleared enough for her to see a wavering figure she could just make out as Serena. Something held her throat in a grip of steel. She weakly reached up and touched an arm. She couldn't see the tears in Serena's eyes. "Damn you Raye. You made me kill Amy! She wouldn't even have been here if not for you. How could you do this to her!" Serena felt her rage build. "This is it Raye! I can't let you get anyone else killed fighting me. Swear you'll follow me or I'll make sure you never interfere again!" Raye managed to whisper. "Murderer! This is all your fault. I swear whatever it takes I will bring you down." "So be it." Raye felt Serena's grip tighten then heard something crack before the darkness rushed in to submerge her. Serena released her hold and let the body slump to the ground. Then she sat down in the alley and wept for both her friends. "Yo, Sailor Moon." The voice penetrated her misery. She saw Jupiter coming in for a landing with something slung over her back. Then Lita took in the scene and her grin vanished. "Oh geez ... Serena ..." "They attacked me ... I had no choice ... I reacted without thinking!" She began to cry again. After a minute she realized Lita was holding her. "It's all right. It was an accident. They shouldn't have interfered with you. I understand. I'm always here to help you." The steady whisper soothed her. Serena straightened up then wiped her eyes and blew her nose on her costume's ribbon. "Remind me to bring tissues from now on." It was a fairly shaky joke but both of them laughed. Serena was about to ask Lita why she'd come looking for her when she saw Lita's former burden squirming on the alley paving. Mina was practically mummified in chain. Uncertain what it would take to hold a Scout Lita had erred on the side of caution. "I had a run in with Venus. She was on her way here to help the ... the others steal your locket." "I see." She knelt down at Mina's side and looked into her former comrades face. Mina's features were locked into a mix of grief and fear. She wanted to cry but was terrified of what Serena might do. "Mina ...", Serena's voice was gentle, "... you have a choice to make. I want you to join us. If you don't ... well I can't let someone with your power oppose us. Do you understand?" Mina's throat felt dry. "You could let me change back then take my pen. Stuck as human I'm no threat to you." Serena shook her head and Mina felt her terror grow. "I'm sorry but that's not good enough. Artemis is still at large. He could give you another. Besides you know far too much about us. We're passed the point of no return Mina. You're either with us or against us." Lita nodded. Mina swallowed with difficulty. She was 15 years old and (was she a coward?) she didn't want to die. Not helpless and at the hands of her former friends. "I understand. I swear to follow you now and forever." Serena looked satisfied. "That's good. But if you ever break your word ..." "I won't." Serena looked into her fear filled face and saw the truth. She nodded to Lita. "You can unchain her." Lita seemed about to protest but did as she was ordered. Serena helped Mina to her feet. "Welcome back." Mina didn't trust her voice so she just bowed. Lita broke the silence. "What about Darrien?" Serena seemed on the verge of tears for a moment. She shook them away. "He's not happy with what we're doing but he won't oppose me. We will never fight each other. In time he'll understand ... after all we are destined to be together. Anyway Mina, welcome to the new and improved Sailor Scouts!" Mina joined hands with the others and matched their smiles. But her gaze flicked to Amy and Raye and all she could think of was how much she wanted to scream. End. "HOLD IT! The turtle over there not only manages to outmanoeuvre me but breaks my neck? You gotta be kidding!" "Yeah and since when am I such a coward? What do you think Amy?" "Well that was certainly depressing." "You're not kidding. Still it should appeal to the cynics who figure power is bound to be abused." "So why are they reading fiction. Don't they get enough of that in the newspapers?" "It's the old urge to jump up and down shrieking, 'There you see, I was right.'" "So you get to be right, so what? Everything's still a mess." "Sure but it's easier than fixing things." "Hey we're sounding kind of serious ourselves." "Guess these scripts are rubbing off on us. By the way who's talking anyway?" Lita put down her latest script and commented, "Y'know this hasn't been much of a dark adventure so far. Only villain to show up was Jedite and someone else toasted him. We haven't even transformed yet. Anyway getting back to the scripts I liked the last story. I got to run around zapping criminals. I could get used to that, I'd make a great action hero! I just need a few snappy one liners while killing people. Let's see ..." Her voice suddenly acquired an Austrian accent, "How'd you like a shock? ... I light up your life ... let's make this an electric chair ... I'm reVolting ..." Mina edged away as she noticed a disturbing glint in Lita's eye. Amy whispered to Raye, "Sexual tension. Soon as she stops repressing herself she'll lose these violent impulses." "Would you shut up before you get us both fried." Oblivious to this Lita kept on trying to sound witty while killing people. Everyone else decided to ignore her and try to decide which was the least painful of these crappy scripts. Serena shrugged, "I vote for 'Childhood's End'. It's a great chance to show my acting talents as the tormented Sailor Moon driven to cold blooded murder. "You do that in the last one as well!" "Yeah but I rationalize it away there. 'sides that's hot blooded murder." Raye snorted. "Forget it I don't get through either of those alive. I vote for 'Collateral Damage'. I'm sort of the badguy but at least we all survive it!" Mina said, "I vote for anything except 'Childhood's End'." She remembered her fate and shivered. Ami shrugged. "Who cares? It's only a story." "I want 'Moonlight Revenge'" "Yeah, yeah, we know. But you're the only one Lita." "I said we're doing, 'Moonlight Revenge'!" "Says who?" "Says me!" "'Collateral Damage'!" "'Childhood's End'!" "'Moonlight Revenge'!" "Who cares?" The bickering continued until the manager called over, "Yo girls, you're gonna have to leave." "WHAT!" He pointed to the tall, dark, handsome guy who'd just walked in. "This guy has the place booked for an anime cast reunion party. They get together here once a year. Like the ambience for some reason." Several of the scouts were drooling over the newcomer. "Hey, we're anime stars too. Well around here we're cartoon stars." "Really?" He smiled. "Well if you'd like to stick around my friends and I would love for you to join us." As they chorused their thanks and forgot about the scripts he turned away momentarily. None of the scouts caught his smile or the red light that appeared in his eyes. But then they never do, do they? The manager left in a hurry as the nonhuman cast members of Urotsuidoji, Angel of Darkness, La Blue Girl and Flare walked, stalked, flew, crawled and slithered towards the soda shop. Which ties in neatly with Raye's prediction back at the start. And you thought I'd forgotten all about it, didn't you? Authors won't wait forever for characters to make up their minds. At any rate what followed will have to be described by someone with a sicker imagination than mine. I am outta here Endsville ****************************************************************************** Probably the weirdest thing I've ever written. A product of several slow days at work, insufficent sleep and a lack of reading materials. Don't worry I'm not planning to inflict full length versions of any of those stories on you. Those were just experiments in how easy it is to write excessively angst ridden Sailor Moon. Frankly I prefer stories with a bit of fun in them. Still to each his, her or its own. Credit where credit is due. The Serena/Mistress Nine scene was inspired by Alan Grant's climax to the "Rage" storyline in "Strontium Dog". We miss you Johnny. Almost forgot, original Sailor Moon Cast created by Naoka Takeuchi. Characters rewritten and renamed by DiC Entertainment. Please don't sue me. Mark Latus Sept. 11 1996 Revision Sept. 21 '96 Comments? Email Mark.Latus@MSVU.CA
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