"A Choice of Heaven"
by Nadya Neklioudova, Nov. 21, 1998
"Who can tell me if we have heaven,
Who can say the way it should be?" – Enya, "China Roses" (song)
(Timeframe: the morning after Kenshin and Kaoru are married)
Rain poured from the frowning morning sky, glittering like streams of silver in the occasional flashes of lightning. The bright sunflowers drooped low under the rain, their leaves hugging the walls of the dojo.
A young dark-haired girl ran by them, brushing the delicate drops off the round flowers, and the water trickled and fell down their petals with the ringing laugh of the smiling girl, her eyes closed in delight.
The little girl opened her sky-blue eyes, and danced in the pouring rain among the sunflowers before the dojo, and her sweet and happy laughter, like bells ringing in the air, almost seemed to light up the sad stormclouds in the sky.
Kaoru sighed in her sleep and opened her blue eyes, which reflected flashes of lightning. The rain poured outside the dojo, but there weren’t any sunflowers there to greet it, unlike the rainy day so many years ago. Hundreds of years it seemed to Kaoru since she was that little girl dancing and laughing in the rain. Her eyes brightened for a moment, remembering that day. Her childhood was like heaven, she thought, she was a lucky girl to have grown up with happiness.
A heaven far away and unreachable.
But they closed again, and a tear trickled down her face onto her pillow. It was the last rainy day she would greet smiling...for her father was killed the next day.
Since then, she could never manage a smile again when it rained.
Kaoru sighed. What are memories for, she pondered. All they do is bitterly remind you of the good times of the past, and stab you like a knife with the bad times...what’s the point of them if one couldn’t re-live the ones they wanted to re-live. Maybe in heaven...but that is too far away as well, she sighed.
She turned on her futon and looked at the one still sleeping next to her. His mane of red hair flowed all over the pillow and his face, for now covering the telling cross scar, and his gentle violet eyes were still closed in sleep. But for Kenshin, sleep was not as peaceful as his appearance suggested.
It was raining on a night so many years ago...too many. Thunder crashed in the sky, just outside as it seemed to the little red-haired boy. He snuggled into his futon, but it didn’t make lying on a wet cold floor any better. Lightning flashed again, and the little boy covered his eyes. He tried to fall asleep, no matter how much the lightning and thunder scared him or how many raindrops fell onto him from the old ceiling of his small house. After all, he’d done it so many more times before. But this night, he just couldn’t sleep...
He got up and went across the room to his parents. He knew they were sick, and he knew they told him not to come close to them for fear that he would be sick as well, but tonight he didn’t care. He snuggled next to them, because they were the only people he could feel safe and comforted near, whether they were ill or not. The little boy slept quietly, despite the rainstorm raging outside.
But they didn’t move when the little boy woke up in the morning. He called to his parents, he shook them so they would wake up... but they didn’t move.
Since that night, Kenshin hated rain.
Kenshin gasped and opened his violet eyes, as an involuntary tear slid down his cheek, over the cross scar. He surveyed the ceiling for a second, taking in the fact that it was raining. He sniffled, ashamed of himself the next second – it’s been so many years but rain still bothered him...
Kaoru stirred, and turned to him. "Kenshin?" she asked in a sleepy voice.
"Sorry...did I wake you?" he whispered sheepishly.
"No, not at all," Kaoru smiled – for the first time on a rainy day since years ago.
Kenshin closed his eyes, though determined not to sleep – he wouldn’t put up with any more nightmares today.
Suddenly he felt Kaoru’s hand wipe the tear away from his face. His eyes opened again, to meet the sky-blue eyes of his beloved. A stray tear trickled down from her eye.
Kaoru blushed, embarrassed, as Kenshin’s hand wiped it away. He smiled up at her. "Memories...?" Half-asking, half-stating.
"Kenshin..." she whispered.
The rain outside seemed to have lessened.
"Hmm?"
"If I could choose my heaven...I’d choose you." Kaoru said, as a blush crept over her face again. "And I don’t care if it rains there," she added sheepishly and smiled.
Kenshin seemed confused for a second about the heaven remark, then smiled. "Me neither."
Questions? Comments? Email me.
Little Note: in the manga, it says Kaoru's father died just before she met Kenshin, but the anime implies her father died when she was very young, and she was taken care of by Dr. Genzai. I am going by the anime version in this fic.
This fanfic was written by me, Nadya Neklioudova aka Kaoru-chan. Kenshin and Kaoru, as well as all RK characters, belong to the great Watsuki Nobuhiro.