*******************
Twist in the tale 8
A different tale.
*******************

(Somewhere)
	A summer morning of dew and sweat, the ground still damp, the 
grass still wet. Two people spar in the sun before the morning feast has 
begun. As they fly and come to blows, a window opens and another face 
shows. A gleam of pearly white in the morning light, he leaps in smiling 
and lands in tight. They greet each other and come to blows, whoever 
wins nobody knows. Suddenly, the first person falls, Into the pool and 
off the wall. Up comes a panda big and strong, from the pool so what’s 
wrong? Sitting there he waits and sees, who will win whatever may be. 
The second person to fall down wet springs up as a girl of sweat. Now 
the third and the last who came, just backs away as the two rise up, 
definitely not tame. He tries to flee, he tries to run, but the others, 
they do want their fun. *Splash!*

	“Dammit! Why did I have to get wet?” I shout as I leapt out of 
the pool. 
	“Hey, like birds of a feather, we stick together.” Ranma-chan 
grinned back as his father guffawed in his panda form. 
	{too true / Heh heh heh.} Came the panda’s reply as the Tendoes 
laughed with them. At least those who were there. 
	“Father, They are really enjoying themselves this morning don’t 
you think?”
	“Yes Kasumi. They definitely are. Perhaps we could convince Akane 
to join them in their morning sparring rather than jogging.”  He said 
as Ranam, Nabiki and I developed big sweat drops at the idea. 

	“Hey Ranma, why do you guys have to drag me to the pond every 
day?”
	“Hey Guo. You can’t really complain. At least you stay the same 
sex when you change. And, you at least get to swim in trunks.” He said 
drying hi... her hair. 
	{Hah you have to change like the rest of us if you’re going to use 
foresight.}

	“Only if you don’t count the number of people who try to exorcise 
me when I go out in this form.” I said taking up the banter. Hey, it’s 
a daily discussion. The merits of a human looking form verses one that 
looks like a spirit being. The best thing about this form is that Movie 
producers have offered me parts in various action movies. Sure, they 
want to cast me either as the bad guy or the guiding spirit but I can 
get to choose my part. Oh yah, Nabiki gets her commission and is more 
than satisfied with the situation too. 
	“Ok but that’s just an annoyance. How would you like people 
hitting on you?”
	{Birds of s feather sticking together} 

	“What? I do have people hitting on me most of the time with their 
paper wands and beads. Or are you saying something like the *Ahem* 
Ministrations of Kuno?” I asked him before turning around. “So 
breakfast in ten minutes?” I asked Kausmi. She nodded to me as she set 
the remaining places on the table. 
	“My Point exactly.” Ranma shot back hotly. Hmm. score one for 
Ranma. 
	{?? is anyone listening to me?}

	“All right. You win.” I smiled as I opened the bathroom door, 
letting the both of us in. 
	“I... ???”
	“But you need to control that anger of yours a little. That’s the 
problem with you and Akane.”
	“What Problem?”
	“See, you lost your cool.” I said entering after him. . her. . 
whatever.
	“DID NOT!” 
	“Stop shouting, you’re only proving me right.” I said as he/she 
started fuming. One point to me.  
	The panda lagged behind, a sign saying {Why are you ignoring me?} 
in his hand.

************

(Inside the bathroom)
	I followed Ranma into the bathroom, taking off my wet shirt as she 
walked over to the sink. A truce is imposed until tonight since we had 
our responsibilities. Or more specifically, I had my responsibility to 
get to work while he has to go to cram school something I don’t need 
except for history.
	“Hey Guo,” 
	“Hmm?”
	“Why haven’t you moved out?”
	“???”
	“I mean, it’s nice having you stay here and all but aren’t you 
supposed to be earning enough to get your own place?”
	“I’m just lazy I guess.”
	“What’ you mean?” 
	“I can get three meals a day here, room and all the amenities of 
a modern home, and basically good friends.”
	“So you enjoy it here?”
	“Yep.”

***********

	I had found out a quite a few things about the curse. The first 
was that I was blessed with higher speed and agility, a better sense of 
balance and overall, a higher level of physical skill and ability in my 
cursed form. 
	My ‘normal’ self is blessed with a good metabolism, healing 
quickly much like Ranma. The other things I notice is that I learn 
things easily in my normal self. But the mental powers can only be fully 
accessed only in my original form. In other words, I have clairvoyance, 
and the whole host of other skills that I can use when I’m not in my 
cursed form though I retain a weak form of clairvoyance in my cursed 
form or perhaps that’s just better reflexes. . 
	That’s not to say anything bad about the cursed form, though I am 
just as fast as Ranma when I’m using the chestnut punch, being able to 
meet Ranma’s 20 punches in two seconds in my normal form. In my cursed 
form, I can do about 30 for his 20, literally enough to blow him away 
and even Cologne if it comes to that. The other thing I notice about my 
second form is that I am more accurate in my movements. It’s like I have 
more time to plan and execute the movements. I can literally tightrope 
across a string in my new form or hit a bull’s eye with a dart from 20 
feet
	For the Normal mode I would be able to tell there is a creaky 
floorboard before me but it still creaks when I move across it.  
However, in my other form, I can move across it without a sound. It’s 
interesting finding all these things but I don’t think I’ll ever find 
everything out nor am I interested in finding everything out. I would 
just rather become normal. 

***************

(later)
	“Ok. The first scene we’re doing is where you two meet. You are 
to fly in and exchange a little dialogue before the token fight we’ll 
edit later. Remember you are Kohan, your family was massacred and you 
are searching for the enemy fortress. He’s a powerful spirit you want to 
enlist to your aid. Be convincing.”
	“Sheesh. All right already! Just start rolling the camera when I 
get into position!” ‘Kohan’ called back to the director. I just sat in 
the tree looking bored as the waterfall cascaded down behind us. Jogging 
rapidly, he went towards the bend while they shot me.

	Acting theatric I just sniffed and opened my eyes. “*Sigh* 
another human comes to bother me.” scratching my chest I leaped over 
the cameraman and landed close to the river where another camera was 
stationed. Leaping onto a rock, I Just sat there and waited. Idly 
looking into the river with my back turned to Kohan. Suddenly darting my 
hand into the water, I pulled out a fish, a nice big salmon. Hopping 
along the rocks, I came back to the bank and started gathering firewood.  

**

	“Is that The Red spirit? The mischievous spirit who steals fire 
from the villagers and took from their gardens? The one who could punch 
through a wall with one hand and subdue demons with the other. . . He 
looks more bored than dangerous. HEY! ARE YOU THE RED SPIRIT?” 
	The creature ignored him and resumed gathering firewood. Suddenly 
he saw the warrior, he looked down for a second, he then hopped to a 
rock in the middle of the river, turning his back to the young warrior.
 	“This spirit ignored my question and is deliberately ignoring me. 
I will have none of this. HEY!” I ran forwards, and towards the 
creature as he drew his hand back.  His arm shot into the water, 
snatching something from the turbulent water in a spray of glistering 
droplets. Looking back at me a smile creased his lips before he tossed 
the flopping fish onto the bank before me.  
	“Start the fire and we’ll have something to eat eh?”

**

(Later) 
	I sat by the fire as he lay down besides me, turning his fish 
while I left mine to cook. A question sprang to mind as I looked into 
his bored face. “What’s your name?”
	“I might tell you but would it do any good? Do the names of other 
creatures matter any to the realms of man?”
	“Look, don’t take it so hard on me. I’m just looking for people 
to help me.”
	“That’s the way of humans is it not? Always looking for people 
who can help them. Help them plant, help them build, help them chop 
trees, *sigh* Just like I needed your help to start a fire.” 
 	“You need help to start a fire? ?” 
	“Yep, unless you want to eat raw fish.” he said yawning in 
boredom.. 
	“... Don’t you know how to start a fire?” I asked the creature 
in confusion.
	“Nope.”
	“. . .” 
	Suddenly he lifted his head and looked at me, a grin on his face. 
“Fire.”
 	“What?”
 	“To cross over the mountains, you have to have someone who knows 
the woods. But if you want that, you have to teach me about fire.” *Big 
grin*
	“Why do you want fire?”
	“What use is fire in this land? It gives warmth on the cold 
winter night, to cook with during the course of the day. What do you 
think?” with a huff, he turned away. Looking out into the darkness with 
his deep brown eyes. 
	“You mean you’ll help me for that?”
	“All I said is I’d guide you. That’s all.” he said annoyance 
evident on his face. 
	“Will you help me?”
	“Help you what?” He said looking at me, with suspicion in his 
eyes. 
	“Help me defeat the Goblins.”
	“What did they do?” he said, evidently annoyed. 
	“They killed my family and raised my village to the ground.”
	“So what?”
	“What do you mean so what? Wouldn’t you want revenge if your 
family was hurt?”
	He remained silent. Lying on his back, his eyes tracked a single 
white cloud as it drifted across the sky. His face was blank and 
unreadable. “So why do you want me to help?”
	“Heard you were a powerful spirit who helped whoever needed it.”
	“Rumors.” he said in annoyance. 
	“Can’t you help me?”
	“Sure.” he said getting up. From his sleeves he pulled out a 
four-piece nunchuck and fitted it together into a staff. “I can knock 
some sense into you.” he said advancing at me as I hurriedly backed 
away. 
	“... Hey wait a minute! I didn’t come to fight!”
	He gave me a long stare as he picked up a quarterstaff like branch 
like a sword. “I really don’t care right now. Either you fight now or I 
kill you where you sit. One.”
	“All right! I’ll fight.” I said leaping to my feet, drawing my 
sword I faced him. 
: 	*evil grin* 

	Leaping forwards, he swung his staff at me, my katana barely came 
up in time to take the full force of the blow. He slid forwards along 
the length of the pole he was holding and punched at my face as I 
hurriedly pushed forwards with my sword. Forcing him to abort or loose a 
few fingers as my blade skimmed the length of the pole. He spun with the 
momentum I gave him, folding the edge off the sword and spinning the one 
end at the level of my neck while I ducked before coming back upwards 
from the ground. I leap backwards, barely catching my footing as the 
staff flew, mere inches from hitting my nose.  
	I scrambled and, I noticed him considering a small box in his 
hand. “Hey that’s Mine!” I shouted at him. 
	Looking back at me a slow smile spread across his face, exposing 
his sharp canines. “Oh is it?” he taunted. Suddenly he dropped the box 
and swung his staff like a sword. I parried yet again but he had other 
ideas. Suddenly The breath whooshed out of me as the staff whacked me 
from the other side. I crumpled to the ground desperately trying to 
catch my breath as he stood over me, confusion on his face.

	“*Sigh* I thought he was some big shot warrior but it’s just 
another amateur.” With that he turned to the fireplace, disappointment 
on his face.
	“*gasp cough,* Aren’t you *wheeze* going to finish this?”
	“No point, you’ll probably die anyway if you go against the 
goblins like that.”
	I just lay there recovering from the attack, liquid sorrow flowing 
from my eyes. “So what? My village was massacred and my family killed. 
They have to PAY for that! If it takes my life to do it, I will!” 
	“If you want to hurt them, then learn to fight or get others to 
fight for you. Idiot.” he said, with obvious disinterest. 
	“BUT they must pay for killing my family!”
	“. . . Revenge besets revenge. Don’t start the cycle since it’s 
not worth it.” 
	“Don’t patronize me, They deserve to die for their crimes. Who 
will settle the spirits of the dead if I don’t? Do you think the spirits 
of the dead will rest easy with the murderers unpunished?”
	“Self righteous babble. People say that to justify the death of 
their enemies. If people are dead, they go to the ground and there they 
stay. It’s the fate of those after them to do the best they can and do 
their best to be happy with the rest of their lives.” 
	“We are assured a place in the river of blood, to fight alongside 
the heroes of yore and to gain our fame in legend”
 	“The only fame you’re getting is if you survive to tell the 
tale.” he said, as he picked up his fish.
	“But they killed my parents! I have to avenge them!”
	“So? just get a wife and create more Humans. That’s what the 
goblins do.”
	“They killed most of my family and I owe a dept of vengeance!”
 	“Not my fault. When you kill a deer what about it’s family? No 
wait, unless you kill a feeding doe they don’t care very much, oh 
well.”
	“. . . Don’t you have a family?”
	He stiffened, as I said that and turned to me, his face 
expressionless and cold. “Once, but I’m not going to talk about it.”
	“Wouldn’t you want a chance to kill anyone who harmed them?” I 
said, reading the visual clues of his manner. 
	“. . .”
	“Wouldn’t you want to rip from limb to limb the person who killed 
them?” I said as I noticed my words getting to him. He seemed to get 
more and more angry not at me but at something, it’s like something in 
the past. . .
 	“STOP! I’ll go with you JUST STOP!” he shouted as he slammed the 
fish to the ground. I was startled buy the sudden change in attitude but 
a satisfied lit my face. I did it! I enlisted his aid! with a huff, he 
moved to the other side of the fire as I noticed a stain on the ground. 
It was the fish, splattered like fine paste on the river shore. Suddenly 
I wasn’t so sure getting him angry was such a good idea.

**************

	We set out the next day. Up the waterfall, over the hills, across 
the stream and off and away. It would be one hundred leagues to the 
goblin’s lair. two weeks would be a reasonable time by foot if we count 
the distance that a crow flies. However, there were more than enough 
natural barriers that would impede our passage, that and training.”
	“WAHHHH!” 
	“Stop screaming. You’ll never be able to beat the goblins if you 
don’t get powerful enough.” With that, he released another boulder, 
sending it scuttling downhill at me as I frantically dodged out of the 
way. 
	“Stop sending boulders at me!”
	“Hey! Anticipate the boulders as they come and either move out of 
the way, or block them unless you want to get hurt. 

****

	“Swim you fool! Just because you are in full armor doesn’t mean 
you can just flounder around like that!” 
	“glub glub”

****

	“Yikes!” I leap away dodging a virtual hail of stones.
	“Hey stop running away! Dodge or parry these stones. You said you 
didn’t want to play with boulders didn’t you?” 
	“Yes! But what’s the difference?” I called out, dodging a rock 
that was just a little smaller than my head. 
	“You can parry these rocks.” he said, sending a fresh volley at 
me. 
	“Aurgggg!”

***

 (A year later) 
	A single hut of mud and brick stands under the branches of an 
ancient tree. Coming out of the hut is a human,


	Running forwards, I burst through the underbrush to see. . . Well, 
I saw him sitting on top a pile of about four humanoid creatures of 
about chest height. A large bump was on the back of their heads as they 
lay there in a pile of unconscious flesh. Their piggish faces frozen in 
various stages of shock and startlment. The red spirit looked at me and 
hopped off them, curiosity in his eyes. “You sure you didn’t want to 
handle them?”

K:	“. . .”

G: 	“*Sniff, Sniff,*  Looks like another batch is coming down the 
road. Do you want to handle them?” he said looking at me expectantly. 

K:	“. . .  Sure.” I said a little dazed. “These are goblins?”
	I walked into the bushes a little to the side of the road and 
squatted down. Drawing my sword, I peeped out the bushes and waited. 
Soon, four Goblins appeared. One heavier goblin, maybe about shoulder 
height, was armed with a sword and buckler while the other three just 
had crude spears. As they started to pass me, I charged forwards through 
the bushes swinging my sword out in a deadly arc of steel to claim the 
large one’s life. I spun around and prepared to meet them head on only 
to see them fleeing in the opposite direction, screaming in fright.

K:	“HEY come back here and fight!” I shouted at their retreating 
figures. Suddenly, a couple of rocks flew past my head and knocked each 
of the goblins on their heads, knocking them down and out. 

G:	“. . .  You really don’t know much about Goblins do you?” he 
said as he popped out of the bushes behind me. 

**************

G:	Well, there are a couple of different types of goblins. There are 
the puny little goblin soldiers like those we handled a while back.  
They’re just minor monsters or cannon fodder in times of war. They don’t 
fight alone unless it’s against a weaker opponent. Even then, they are 
cowards. Then next up is a goblin sargent. They are slightly braver and 
heavier set than the normal ones. They keep the Goblins under them in 
line with treats of violence and retribution. You take him out and many 
times, the others will flee. Now, the next more powerful person in the 
goblin chain is the goblin captain. They a just about man size and much 
stronger than a normal Goblin. The next one up the line is the shamans. 
They don’t have a actual line in the Goblin Hirachy but are more in the 
sense advisors and assist the Captains in their jobs and the chieftains 
above them. Getting all of this so far?”

K: 	“I think so . . .”

G: 	“Good because the next line is pretty important. It’s the 
chieftains. The Goblin community are broken up into separate villages 
who are all accountable to the king of the Goblins and his Henchmen. 
Usually the biggest or the best warrior of all the goblins becomes King 
whenever there is a dispute over the kingship. It’s most likely that 
it’s a Large grunt who want to be king but the Shaman he has at his side 
does most of the controlling. In any case, the King has the power to 
call upon the Goblin warriors throughout his realm and the four warriors 
that come with the post. They are the four warrior generals of, the fire 
stalker, the Ice maiden, the Iron goblin and the Water walker. 

K: 	“So what does that have to do with me?”

G: 	“It’s easy.  You have to find a way to defeat or get around the 
four Generals before you can even fight the king. Then if you actually 
defeat the king. then there is about one year in which the Goblin ranks 
are thrown into turmoil before they find another king.  Allot of 
upheavals, deaths from fighting between villages, riots and all that. In 
any case, if you kill the four Generals, then the thing is over since 
they are the ones who give the position any authority.”

K: 	“Oh... How do you know all this?”

G:	“... I’m 500 years old. I know these things.”

K:	“Oh... So what’s the problem?”

G: 	“Each of the Generals can take out a small army.”

K:	“. . .”

G: 	“In any case, it seems I’ll have to train you or I’ll never learn 
the secret of fire from you.”

K:	“. . . Just one question before we start. How did you knock out 
the goblins?”

G:	“That’s easy, you just throw stones at them. If you hit the back 
of their heads they most likely pass out. If you hit the forehead, it 
just bounces off so you need to aim for the neck. It’s that easy.”

K:	“. . . so how do I kill the Generals?”

G:	“*Gin.* Now that is another question altogether. *heh, heh, 
heh.*”

*************

	What followed in the ensuring days was a regimen to learn balance 
and speed. Leaping through the forest of green, he lead me in the chase 
of my life. For a few steps away he always stayed, the packs in his 
possession. Taunting me with the ease he had in leaping from branch to 
branch even burdened with the packs as I strove my best to keep up with 
him. An annoying thing he did was throw rocks and twigs at me every now 
and then and expect me to catch and throw them right back. I earned my 
fair share of bruises from them. Then next exercise was just swimming. 
Not the normal swimming you and I are used to but Swimming across a 
river in full armor. It was an experience that I would not soon forget. 
I barely made it across the freezing water. 

G:	“You had enough yet?” he said as he knelt over my shivering 
from. 

K: 	“Nn.n.n.no. I.iii Ju.j.j.jus.st st.st.st.arted.” he looked at me 
with a resigned expression. 

G: 	“Well, start a fire and warm yourself up first. it looks like a 
long time before you will be ready to take them on... *sigh* Idiot 
human.” he turned away and disappeared into the bushes. 

	Standing in the clearing, I felt the cold breeze blow through my 
frozen clothes, wondering if I would survive the training.


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