Final Fantasy VIII Another Life *WARNING: THERE MAY BE MINOR SPOILERS IN THIS CHAPTER* Hikaru Shino sighed as he leaned back on his chair, as he stared at the computer screen in front of him, biting his thumbnail in frustration. A bad habit that he wasn't able to get rid of in his younger days, he turned to look at his roommate, Kenichi Miyamura, a tall, lanky young man with short, black hair, who was staring at him as though he had gone mad. "I'm not going to Aya-san's party. Period." Hikaru tried not to look irritated. It had been the fourth time that Kenichi had asked him. "Are you REALLY sure? I mean, Aya-chan's your best friend" he thought sadly. "I'm sure, Ken. I need to finish this." "I really can't believe you passing up on an oppurtunity to party just because of that." Kenichi waved his arm towards the computer, indicating the project Hikaru was working on. Hikaru glared at Kenichi. He was not in the mood to be bothered with things like this. Kenichi held up his hands, as if indicating surrender. "Alright, alright, but just don't blame me if you miss all the fun." With that, he made his way out of the dorm room. Drinking tea from the mug on his desk, Hikaru stood up to get some more tea from their makeshift kitchen. The silence in the room only lasted a few seconds before a familiar voice interrupted it once again. "Are YOU really sure you're not going?" Hikaru's answer was to grab a pillow from his bed and throw it at the head sticking out of the slightly open doorway. Kenichi pulled his head outside and closed the door quickly before the pillow could hit him, laughing. Hikaru smiled in spite of himself. With that, he sat back down and his chair and continued the grueling task of sorting out the bugs in his project. A good five hours later, Hikaru laid on his bed, exhausted. Kenichi was still not back from the party. He glanced at the clock. <1 AM...Like he'd be back THIS early, > he thought with some amusement. Taking a clean towel from the pile of clothes beside the bathroom, he took a long and refreshing shower, getting ready for bed. As soon as he slumped on his bed, the door opened and Kenichi came in. "Oh man, Hikaru. You just missed the party of the century!" "Let me guess...all the girls stripped and danced naked for you?" Hikaru gave him an amused smile. "Nothing like that...although I wish that would happen." Kenichi chuckled. "You should have gone, Hikaru. You would have seen just how sexy Aya was, especially with that body-hugging outfit of hers." Hikaru groaned. "You stink like hell." Kenichi took a sniff from himself, before muttering, " Must be the alcohol..." With that, he entered the bathroom. Soon, shower sounds could be heard, mixed with some off-key singing. "Pipe down, will ya? I'm trying to sleep here." Hikaru put his head under his pillow. "I thought you'd might want me to sing a lullaby for you." Kenichi chuckled with some amusement. Hikaru mused while trying to shut his brain off from Kenichi's listening. But as soon as he closed his eyes, his exhaustion from earlier finally took over and sleep came readily to him... ***** Hikaru opened his eyes. He was standing on a vast field of flowers, under a clear, blue sky. Hikaru took a step forward. Looking around, he saw only flowers and petals, being blown by the wind into the air in a kaleidoscope of colors and fragrances. Hikaru breathed in the scents of the flowers around him. With that, he flopped down on a flowerbed and enjoyed the tranquility of the scene in front of him. He has always enjoyed watching nature since his childhood, helping him forget the troubles of the world and making him feel peace within his heart. As Hikaru stretched his hands over his head, he noticed a single white feather being blown by the wind together with the petals. Pulling himself into an upright position, his eyes followed the feather's direction, and noticed someone standing in a distance from him. Her back was turned on him, and she was wearing a blue, sleeveless blouse, as blue as the sky itself, the bodice snugly fitting her hips, and had a long tail of cloth extending towards the ground. Her shoulder-length, black hair partly covered a pair of embroidered wings sewn onto the back of her outfit. Standing, Hikaru called out to her. The girl didn't seem to hear him, as she continued to stand as still as a stone, the rippling of her hair and cape the only signs of movement from her. "Hey!" Hikaru called out again, this time walking slowly towards her. Again, the girl continued to ignore him, watching the petals dance to the tune of the wind in front of her, as Hikaru continued his way towards her. When he reached the girl, Hikaru lightly tapped her shoulder. Slowly, she turned towards him, her graceful movement accenting her feminine curves beneath the outfit, as the world suddenly turned white... ***** Hikaru woke up groggily, his fatigue from the night before not entirely gone. He looked over his shoulder at the other bed in the room. Kenichi, so far, was still in dreamland and isn't gonna wake up until before lunchtime. , he mused as went by to his daily morning routine, namely taking a quick shower and getting ready for his morning classes. Glancing at the mirror for a quick check, he ran his hand through his short, somewhat unruly brown hair, took the books on top of his desk, and quietly made his way out of the room, leaving the still-asleep Kenichi. Books in hand, he decided to get himself a quick bite. Walking briskly towards a nearby diner, he noticed a very familiar girl waving at him. Smiling at her, he waved back as she quickly walked towards him. "Shinami-chan, ohayou." A pretty girl with straight, black hair flowing all the way to her back, she had cute, little black eyes that could only come from someone who was from Chinese descent. She was wearing a sleeveless, blue sundress that was cut short above the knee, exposing her shapely legs that could make any guy stare. "Ohayou, Hikaru-kun." Shinami had always been one of Hikaru's closest friends, and ever since the incident with Aya, she was the one who had helped him get back on his feet. Since then, he already had harbored feelings for her. Special feelings more than friendship. Together, they headed towards the diner. "By the way, I didn't see you yesterday at Aya-san's party." Shinami looked at him as if she were scrutinizing his every move. "I...I had something I really need to attend to." Hikaru sputtered out. "Really? Kenichi said you had a bad cold yesterday...You seem fine now." Shinami had an amused grin on her face. "Uh...gomen." Shinami gave him a concerned look. "I know you're still uneasy whenever Aya-san's near, but you really have to get over this." "Ah...yeah, I guess so..." Hikaru managed a weak grin. Shinami sighed, as they entered the diner, and sat at a booth near the door. "Well, I guess I couldn't really blame you for feeling that way." They continued with their conversation as they ate, before continuing on to the university. Hikaru then accompanied her to her college building before heading towards his. As he arrived in his classroom, he noticed that it was still empty. Funny. The room should be packed by now. Taking his usual seat by the window, he watched the people outside stroll about, going by their usual duties. Sometimes, he enjoyed such moments. "Is this seat taken?" So occupied was he in watching the people outside that he didn't notice the question. It was the tap on his shoulder that snapped him out of his reverie. Facing the person who tapped him, he caught his breath. Standing beside him was probably the most beautiful girl Hikaru has ever seen. Long waves of black hair, with streaks of brown on the sides, flowed down past her shoulders, framing a heart-shaped face with pretty, dark eyes and rosy lips. She was wearing a white shirt cut low enough to show two silver rings hanging from a chain around her neck and tight, blue jeans that showed off her shapely figure. Hikaru tried hard not to stare, although failing miserably in the process. The girl looked at him questioningly, an amused smile on her lips. "I asked if this seat was taken." She motioned towards the seat beside him. Hikaru struggled for something to say. He has always been very shy when it comes to girls, especially pretty ones. "Ah...ah...yes...ah, I mean... no, it's not," Hikaru managed to stammer out. Grinning, she sat on the empty seat and looked at him curiously, before bursting into laughter. "What's so funny?" Barely containing her laughter, she managed to answer before erupting in another fresh round of giggles, "It's...It's just that it's the first time ...I've seen someone look at me like that!" Hikaru felt his cheeks burn. Stifling her giggles, she looked at him, her amusement showing in her eyes. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to laugh at you. It's just that you looked so cute awhile ago, with that expression on your face." She gave him another amused grin. "Uh...heiki. It's just that..." He could just feel his cheeks growing hotter by the second. Placing her chin above her hands, with her elbows planted on the desk, she leaned towards him. "It's just what?" "Ah...iiee, it's nothing." Hikaru could feel his heart pounding in his chest. He was never this nervous before. Well, at least not in front of a girl. He managed to catch his hand before it reached his lips, his bad habit trying to take over again. She glanced towards the window, then asked, "So, what's interesting about the outside? You seem to be in a trance a while ago, staring through the window like that. Are you looking for someone?" "Ah...no...well, I ...I sometimes enjoy watching people go by. Kinda makes me feel peaceful...you know, that sort of thing..." Hikaru trailed off. She gave him a warm smile, as if agreement to what he had just said, and then, extended her hand. "I'm Rin Hoshino." Hikaru responded by returning the handshake. "Hikaru Shino. Yoroshiku." As their conversation continued, Hikaru felt more and more relaxed around her, as if she were an old friend to him. Although he never knew why, he had this little inkling at the back of his head that he knew her at some point in the past. Soon, people started to come into the room, with the guys either staring at Rin in admiration or glaring at him in jealousy. Hikaru felt a little uneasy with all the guys staring at them. At the corner of his eye, he saw Aya enter the room. She was a pretty girl, with her long, wavy, light-brown hair held by a white hairband, wearing a short, red dress that fit snugly on her hips. She glanced at him, a little surprise showing on her face, before heading towards her seat, followed by her boyfriend, Ryuji Sasahara. Ryuji, on the other hand, glanced at Rin, admiration showing in his eyes, before sitting on the empty chair beside Aya. "Hikaru?" Hikaru gave a start. He realized that his thoughts started drift towards Aya again. Even after a year, he still had some feelings for her, even though how little it may seem. "Ah...gomen. I was just thinking." Rin gave him an amused smile and then leaned forward and whispered to his ear, "About the girl that just came in?" Hikaru stared at Rin. He was about to deny the fact when the arrival of their professor, a short, dark man with a voice as flat as a ruler, cut him short. As Hikaru opened his book, he mentally groaned to himself. Then he caught Rin looking at him, amusement showing in her eyes again. Smiling, she opened her own book and proceeded to the assigned pages of the lecture. ***** Only three hours have passed since the start of Hikaru's classes, but it could have been more like a lifetime to him. Finally, his last class dismissed and he started to gather his things, when Rin tapped him on the shoulder. "Neh, Hikaru-kun. How about having lunch together?" For the first time, Hikaru noticed that she was just as tall as he was, as she flashed him another of her warm smiles. "Sure. I'd love to, " Hikaru replied, trying to ignore the looks he had been receiving from the guys ever since before class, while gathering his books under his arm. "Then, let's go." Grabbing his hand, Rin proceeded to lead him out of the room. Hikaru was trying hard not to blush. They might have just met awhile ago, but to other people, they could have been a couple already, with Rin holding his hand like that. "So, what about that girl awhile ago?" Rin asked, while on the way to the campus cafeteria. "Girl? What girl?" Hikaru wanted to avoid talking about the topic. Even though a year had passed since the incident with Aya, it was like reopening old wounds to him. "The girl that you were thinking about, the girl with the red dress and brown hair." Rin had an amused, yet somewhat mischievous smile on her face. "Gomen, Rin-san, but I don't think I can talk about that...at least, not yet." Rin had a look of understanding on her face. "Gomen ne, Hikaru-kun. I didn't realize..." "Iiee, you don't have to apologize. It's just...I'll probably tell you in due time, when I'm ready." Rin at first had an unreadable look on her face, then gave him a comforting smile that seemed to fill the emptiness that had come from thinking about Aya within him. Hikaru smiled back. "Arigato, Rin-san." A few moments of silence passed between them as they continued on their way. As they entered the cafeteria, Rin asked, "So, you're a junior?" "Ah," Hikaru replied. "How 'bout you? Are you a new student here?" "Transfer student," Rin corrected. "I came all the way from England." "England!? Wow, that's pretty far, but then again, you don't look like English to me." "That's because my parents are not English," Rin said, giving him another amused smile, while sitting on a nearby empty booth. Hikaru followed suit, taking the empty seat in front of her. When they were both seated, an odd look suddenly came into Rin's features, as Hikaru saw her visibly stiffen, staring towards something, or someone over his shoulder. Grabbing her books, she gave Hikaru an apologetic look. "Gomen, Hikaru-kun, but I just remembered something I have to do. I'll see you tomorrow!" With that, she walked hurriedly towards the direction she had been staring at. Hikaru's eyes followed Rin as she disappeared among the crowd of students. He tried to find out what Rin had been staring at, but all he saw was throngs of students milling around the campus. Sighing, he started towards the line of students waiting for their lunches... ***** Rin walked hurriedly, almost tripping over a crack on the pavement. Giving an irritated grunt, she looked around for the one she was following. After 2 long years of searching in vain, she might have finally found a clue to her goal, and she wouldn't let a small thing as her pride get in the way. Rounding a corner, she desperately searched for that someone. Seeing him, she almost ran to catch up to him. As she neared him however, he suddenly turned around. "Why, hello there. You're the new transfer student, right?" A tall, young man with slick, brushed-back light brown hair and brown eyes, Ryuji Sasahara was dubbed as one of the best-looking guys at JIT, and also had been one of the most notorious playboys around, although now it seems that he finally found his place beside Aya Nakagawa. Rin, a little surprised, managed to utter a confused "Eh..." before Ryuji suddenly scooped up her hand and kissed it. "It is truly a pleasure to meet you. My name is Ryuji Sasahara." Ryuji gave her one of his "killer" smiles, as he released her hand. Rin knew of Ryuji's reputation. "Rin Hoshino. Nice to meet you." Rin returned his smile with a simple one. "Perhaps you might want to join me for lunch? Then I could give you a tour of the campus, just to let you familiarize your surroundings." Ryuji still retained that smile of his. "Gomen, Sasahara-san, but I just remembered that I really have to do something. Maybe some other time." With that, Rin turned to go, but Ryuji lightly held her shoulder. "Some other time...I'll remember that." Ryuji smiled at her again before releasing her shoulder, then turned around and walked towards the campus gates. Rin stared at his back. He had been very like him. Like someone Rin used to know in the past. Someone Rin used to like, or maybe even love. As Rin turned around and walked towards the opposite direction Ryuji had gone to, she whispered the name of that someone, "......Seifer..." ***** Hikaru glanced at the open textbook beside him as he took a bite from the sandwich he was holding. Normally, he would have gotten more for his lunch, but for some reason, he wasn't really hungry. His thoughts were interrupted by a sudden pat at his shoulder. "Yo Hikaru! Heard you were with a hot girl all morning!" Kenichi had a wide grin on his face, one that he always wears whenever it concerns his biggest interest: girls. "It wasn't exactly all morning," Hikaru replied, as Kenichi took the seat in front of him. "I just met her in class, and we just talked." "Talked!? Only talked! Man, if I were you, I could have asked her out already!" Kenichi had a disgruntled expression on his face. "Well...actually, we were gonna have lunch together, but something came up, so she had to go." "Aw...poor Hikaru, he got dumped even before they had their first date..." Kenichi gave Hikaru an amused look. "Her name?" "Rin Hoshino." Hikaru popped the last bite of his sandwich into his mouth before closing the textbook he was reading. "And?" "She's a new transfer student from England, and don't go asking me for her number. I didn't get it." Hikaru took a sip from the cup of coffee in front of him. "Aww..., oh well..." Kenichi at first seem disappointed, but after a shrug, the wide grin slowly creeping back. "So, what's her score?" "Hmm? What score?" Then Hikaru remembered that he and Kenichi always had a kind of "scoreboard" when it comes into rating girls. "Ummm..." Hikaru thought about it for a second. "I'd probably give her a ten." "Ten!? She's that gorgeous!? Man, I definitely have to meet her." Then a very amused expression came into Kenichi's face. "Wait a minute, the only girls you have rated so far with a ten are Aya and Shinami." Kenichi gave Hikaru a very mischievous smile. Hikaru almost choked on the coffee he was drinking. "What do you mean?" Kenichi clasped his hands together in front of him, blinking his eyes prettily at Hikaru like a love-struck girl. "Oh, is this the feeling they call love? My heart is pounding, my mouth is dry, I can't seem to say anything. Oo, I'm so embarassed!" Hikaru could literally feel a giant sweatdrop on the back of his head. "I'm not falling in lo-" "Hikaru's in love!?" A voice behind Hikaru suddenly interrupted him. Turning around, he saw Shinami with a lunch tray in hand and a bottle of water in the other, with an amused smile on her face. "Mou, Shinami-chan. Not YOU too!" Hikaru mock-glared at her, while she just answered with a sugary-sweet smile. Grinning, she sat down with the two of them and turned to Kenichi. "So, who's the lucky girl?" "Her name's Rin Hoshino, and from what I hear from Hikaru and the others out there, she is definitely hot! H-O-T! hot!" "Rin Hoshino? The new girl?" Shinami looked at Hikaru, taking a sip from the bottle of water she had bought. "You know her?" Hikaru looked at Shinami, surprised, drinking from his cup. "No, but almost all the guys in my class are talking about her. I'm a little surprised that you've met her, considering that you always freeze and seem to turn into a tomato in front of a pretty girl." Shinami gave Hikaru an amused smile, as she took a bite from her sandwich. "Yeah, like right now," Kenichi added, with Hikaru almost spitting out the coffee he was drinking, while Shinami was trying hard to contain her giggling. Hikaru thought darkly. "Well, I guess I'd better leave you two lovebirds now. Besides, I have a class in..." Kenichi glanced at his watch. "Shimatta! I'm late!" With that, Kenichi hurried towards his college building, waving goodbye to both of them, while Shinami erupted in another fresh bout of giggles. Hikaru grinned at the retreating back of Kenichi as Shinami's laughter died down. "So, Shinami-chan, how's the play going?" Shinami had been a member of the Theatre Guild ever since she entered JIT, and she had been given the lead female role in their latest drama. "It's doing fine, although I'm afraid going to be postponed again due to the theatre repairs." Shinami sighed, then leaned forward towards Hikaru. "By the way, you haven't forgotten your promise, have you?" "Promise? What promise?" Shinami gave him a dark look. "Jodan, jodan. How could I forget? I promised to help you with your lines 'til the big day. " Shinami smiled sweetly. "You'd better." Hikaru cleared his throat. "By the way, Shinami-chan, how 'bout watching a movie this afternoon?" Although Hikaru had gone out with her many times in the past, he still felt a little nervous every time he asked her. "Sure! It has been a while since we last went out together," She replied, giving him a warm smile. "Great! Then I'll wait for you in front of the movie house." "Okay. 4 o'clock, neh? Well, I'd better go now. I have a Psychology class in ten minutes." Taking a drink from her bottle, she gathered her things. "Ja ne, Hikaru-kun!" With a wave and a smile, she walked briskly towards the cafeteria doors. Hikaru sighed happily. This may be his chance to finally tell Shinami about his feelings. Gathering his own things on the table, he walked out of the cafeteria and towards his dorm, a smile slowly creeping in his features. ***** Hikaru glanced at his watch, as he leaned against the wall beside the movie house. Eyes scanning the people passing by the theatre, he waited patiently for Shinami. Just when he was about to approach the phone booth near him to call her, he spotted Shinami walking hurriedly towards him. "Gomen, Hikaru-kun. I was caught up in some last-minute work for the play. Did I make you wait too long?" She was wearing a sleeveless, striped green shirt and tight white jeans that wrapped around her slender legs. Hikaru stared at her for a split second before answering. "Heiki. I just arrived a little while ago." "Well then, let's go inside. The film's gonna start any minute now." "Un!" Shinami smiled, as Hikaru led her towards the ticket booth. Entering the theatre, it didn't take them a long time to find seats, even though the place was packed with people. The movie started as soon as they sat down. The movie was a love story about a guy who fell in love with his brother's fiancee. Although Hikaru wasn't much into drama, he was fascinated by the film's story line, probably due to the fact that he had a lot in common with the movie's main character, but his mind was filled with other thoughts. With a glance towards his side, Hikaru saw Shinami staring at the movie screen, too entranced by the movie to notice him. With that, he began to wonder. He suddenly felt a pain in his chest, as he remembered a time like this in the past. Making a deep sigh, he started to reach towards her hand, but pulled back quickly as she finally noticed him staring at her. "What's wrong, Hikaru-kun?" "Ah...eh...iiee. Nandemo..." Hikaru could feel his cheeks burning. At that moment, he felt that he could just melt to the floor in embarrassment, although Shinami didn't seem to notice due to the darkness of the theatre. Giving him a puzzled look that melted into a small smile, she turned her attention back to the film. Hikaru leaned back on his seat. Making a disgruntled sigh, he shifted his attention once more to the film, momentarily putting what he was about to do out of his mind. ***** Evening came as Hikaru and Shinami strolled casually in the park after having a hearty dinner at one of the nearby restaurants. The park grounds, usually filled with playful children and dating couples, was now empty, as Hikaru and Shinami sat on one of the benches, quietly enjoying the peace and serenity of their surroundings. Hikaru gave a small, contented sigh. He enjoyed moments like this, and he knew Shinami enjoyed them as well, as he made a glance towards her, seeing a peaceful expression on her face. Bracing himself, he forced out the words, "Uh...Shinami-chan...Ano sa..." "Hm?" Shinami turned to look at him questioningly, the light of the park lamps reflecting on her dark eyes and her shiny, dark, flowing hair, making her seem like an angel from the heavens. "I...uh..." For some reason, his tongue seemed to be frozen as he stared at Shinami. "Neh, honti ni daijobu? You've been kinda listless tonight. Is something bothering you?" Shinami's eyes had a look of concern, as she brushed a stray lock of black hair from her face. "Ah...iiee, it's nothing. Nothing really." For a moment, Hikaru panicked, then regained his composure. Shinami had first a dubious look on her face, but was replaced by a warm smile, as she leaned back on the bench, her gaze turning back to the peaceful scene in front of them. "It's really peaceful here tonight, neh, Shinami-chan?" "Eh...it's rare to find instances like this here in Juuban nowadays..." Shinami gave a small, peaceful sigh. "Ano sa...Shinami-chan...do you still remember that rumor a couple of months ago?" "Hm? What rumor?" "The one where they thought that we...um...we were..." Hikaru tried hard not to let his voice tremble. "Oh. THAT rumor...don't worry about it. Somebody must have thought we were having a relationship since we were always together at that time." Shinami had a small look of amusement on her face. "I thought that rumor already died out back then, since we both denied it." "Well, actually...I...uh...kinda didn't tell the whole truth at that time..." Shinami turned towards him, a surprised look on her features. "Hikaru-kun...what do you mean?" "The truth...the truth is...that I've had feelings for you ever since you helped me back on my feet after what happened with Aya...Shinami-chan...I..." "I...I...I love you..." A moment of silence passed between them, as Shinami seemed to let the meaning of Hikaru's words sink in. "I...I don't know what to say..." Shinami seemed to be confused. "I'm sorry, Hikaru-kun. I don't think I can ever..." Shinami's voice trailed off. Hikaru knew what she had meant. That she can never return his love, that she can never have a place for him in her heart. He felt a new pain inside him, so new, so intense and yet so similar to the pain he felt a long time ago, threatening to swallow him, to engulf him in its torturous grip. Hikaru closed his eyes, trying to ease the pain, trying to forget what she had just said, as he blinked back tears that threatened to flow. He realized that no matter how he had tried...no matter what he did...he would always be alone... "Neh...Hikaru-kun? Are you alright?" Hikaru finally opened his eyes. "Ah...eh...I'm alright...it's kinda getting late now. Saa, kai ruu masho..." Shinami gave him a weak smile, as she slowly stood up. "Eeh..." As they walked in silence towards Shinami's house, Hikaru had a blank look on his face, as he brooded on his thoughts, although Shinami never seemed to notice since she, too, was occupied by her own. Hikaru felt a storm of emotions coursing within him. Anger at how things were, disgust at himself for ever thinking of doing what he just did, sadness at Shinami's rejection, but most of all, loneliness...Although Hikaru kind of expected this discouraging response from Shinami, it was still different experiencing the real thing. As the duo reached the steps that led to Shinami's home, Hikaru softly said, "We're still friends...are we?" Shinami looked at him for a moment and answered, "...Of course...Oyasumi, Hikaru-kun..." With that, she turned and opened the door, glancing at him for a short moment before slowly closing it. Hikaru sighed, as he walked stiffly towards his dorm, his thoughts focused on Shinami, how beautiful she looked, how her smile always seem to brighten up his day, how she would never love him... Hikaru blinked back the new tears that seemed to hover at the edge of his eyes, as a sudden blast of cold night wind blew past him. Ignoring the chill, he kicked a nearby cola can on the ground and watched it bounce off a wall and onto the street, as he continued his way towards his dorm, silently grieving at his loss... <...I'll always be alone... > ***** Shinami slowly brushed her hair, as she silently brooded on her thoughts. As soon as she put down her brush, her door opened, and a middle-aged woman with shoulder-length black hair the same shade as Shinami's peeked inside. "Neh, Shinami, are you alright?" Turning towards the woman, she answered, "I'm alright, Okaasan. What made you ask?" "Mesume, you've been very quiet ever since you came home a while ago. You never acted this way before, ever since childhood. Your father and I are extremely worried about you." Shinami's mother, Akiko Fujiwara, entered her room and sat down on the bed of her daughter, worry in her still lovely face despite her age. "Iieee, Okaasan. It's nothing. It's just that..." Shinami's voice trailed off. She didn't exactly know how to explain to her mother what had just happened. Her mother seemed to understand despite her inability to express it out. "Personal problems...neh?" "Eh..." Shinami's thoughts were a bundle of confusion right now. She really didn't know what to do. Gathering up her courage, she asked, "Okaasan...how would you tell a guy that...that it's best that if you two would just be friends and nothing more?" "Hmm...that would be hard, Shinami, since no matter what you say, you will always wind up hurting that guy's feelings...I think it would be best if you told him early ...then probably give him some time on his own..." Akiko gave her daughter a comforting smile. "It's Hikaru-kun, isn't it?" Shinami's eyes widened as she gave her mother a stunned look. "You knew!?" "Of course I knew. I've noticed since the first time he came here that he's a little bit timid and listless whenever you're around. Only a man in love would look like that." Akiko had a look of amusement on her face. Shinami blushed. "But...but I thought that was because he was really shy so..." "Looks like you've still got a lot to learn about boys, mesume..." Akiko waved her finger at her daughter, before both of them bursting into giggles like old high school best friends. "Well, you better get ready for bed. You still have classes tomorrow, neh?" Akiko strode over to the door. "Okaasan," Shinami said before her mother left. "Arigato, Okaasan. Oyasumi." Akiko smiled warmly at her daughter before closing the door. "Your welcome, mesume. Oyasumi nasai." With that, Shinami closed off her night lamp and laid on her bed, sleep slowly coming to her as she whispered, "Gomen, Hikaru-kun..." ***** Hikaru opened his eyes. He was standing again in the same field of flowers that he had dreamt in the past. With that, his eyes scanned for the girl with the blue dress, but was only greeted by the colorful shades of the flowers on the ground and the petals in the wind. Sighing, he sat down on the flower bed. [I'll be here...] A hauntingly, familiar voice suddenly rang through Hikaru's mind, as he stood up abruptly. "Who's there?" [I'll be waiting for you...] Hikaru walked forward, searching for the source of the voice. Eyes scanning his surroundings, he shouted, "Who are you? Where are you!?" [I'll be waiting for you...so...] Hikaru started to run. For some reason, he knew the source of the voice was the girl in blue. Just the, a flash of blue caught Hikaru's eye. It was the girl, with her back turned on him again, the long tail of cloth of her outfit moving in perfect harmony with the wind, as with her black hair. A pair of white, ghostly wings suddenly sprang from the embroidered ones on her back, scattering numerous crystalline feathers in the wind. A single feather, shining with an unusual white light, floated towards him, as he easily reached up and caught it. Staring at the glowing feather on the palm of his hand, Hikaru gasped and jerked back his head as thousands of visions filled his mind. Flashes of memory that weren't his own, illusions of events and places foreign to him, portraits of faces unknown to him, all seeming to tear his very sanity away from him. Abruptly, he threw the glowing feather away, gasping, his knees giving way as he sank to the ground. Staring at the ground for a moment, he looked up to see the girl in blue in front of him, still with her back turned to him, but somehow losing the wings from earlier. "Who are you? What are you doing to me!?" Hikaru said vehemently, as he stood up gingerly, reaching out to touch the girl's shoulder. But as soon as his fingers met with the blue fabric, a blazing, light emerged from where he touched the girl, covering everything in white... ***** Hikaru suddenly sat up, gasping. Sweat glistened on his temples as it flowed down his cheeks and neck, soaking the white shirt he was wearing. Throwing the covers off him, he glanced at Kenichi in the other bed, still asleep in a very awkward position. Looking at his alarm clock that read 3:00 AM, he stood up and went to the makeshift kitchen of their dorm room. Pouring himself a glass of water, his thoughts suddenly reverted back to what had just happened between him and Shinami, as he tried to stop the tears that threatened to emerge once again. Taking a drink from the glass, he sighed sadly. Somehow, things never really worked out for him in things like this. Leaving the half-full glass on his desk, he climbed back to his bed, and soon fell into a light, dreamless sleep. ***** Hikaru slowly climbed the stairs up in his college building, a depressed look on his face. As he had expected, Shinami had deliberately avoided him all morning, talking with a pair of girls Hikaru knew as her acquaintances. he thought sadly, as he remembered a time like this a couple of years ago, only now, he had no one to lean on, no one to help him face the pain. Giving a deep, sad sigh, he entered his classroom... ...Only to see a familiar figure sitting on the seat beside his. "Ohayou, Hikaru-kun!" Rin's smile was exceptionally bright this morning. Although normally it would've made him smile also, it failed to lift up his heavy mood. "Hikaru-kun? Doshitano? You look depressed, " Rin asked as soon as Hikaru was seated on his usual seat. For a moment, Hikaru was tempted to tell her. Tell her about Shinami, about his pain and loneliness... "Iiee, it's nothing, Rin-san..." Rin gave him a look of concern. "I know something's bothering you..." She put her hand on his shoulder. "Look, Hikaru-kun, whatever it is, I think it's best if you-" "Gomen, Rin-san...but I would like to be alone for now." Hikaru looked away, a sad expression on his face. Rin had an unreadable expression on her face. " ...Sou ka? Gomen ne, Hikaru-kun." Rin never spoke to him again for the rest of morning, which made Hikaru a little bit guilty of what he had said to her. Just as his last class for the morning ended, Hikaru turned towards the seat beside him. " Anou, Rin-san, I'm sorry about what I said earlier... " Rin merely gave him a small smile. " Don't worry about it. I'm the one who should be apologizing to you, being so insistent and forward like that. But I'm sure things'll work out fine, whatever it is that's bothering you. " "I hope so," Hikaru answered with a sad look. "Now, to make up for yesterday..." Rin grabbed his hand and proceeded to drag him out of the room, into the hallway, and through the main exit of the building "Cho...chotto matte...Rin-san, where are you taking me?" Hikaru sputtered out. Rin gave him a playful look. " *We* are eating outside, and *I'm* treating. " " De...de mo..." Hikaru tried to object, but nothing seemed to change the strong-willed girl's mind about making up for their lunch yesterday. After making their way out of the campus, Rin stopped in front of a small, rustic café with am unusually large sign that said, "ABCB Café". " Irrashai. " As they entered the café, a tall, pretty girl with long, blue hair greeted them and motioned towards the last empty table near the far end of the café. " I never thought this place was so popular." Hikaru said as soon as they were seated. Rin gazed at the other people in the café. " I've been to this place with a friend once, only that it was never this packed. " < Boyfriend, probably. > Hikaru thought glumly, idly drumming his fingers against the table. Rin leaned forward towards Hikaru, then suddenly asked. " So, who's the girl? " " Wha...what!? How did you..." Hikaru stammered, genuinely surprised. < Does she know...!? > Rin laughed. " I was just joking. " Then her expression suddenly turned serious. " Wait a minute. You mean the reason you were so depressed this morning was because of a girl? " Hikaru looked away, a sad expression on face. " Shinami-chan isn't just a girl... " He sighed, then gave Rin a serious look. " Back then, I was still in love with this certain girl, a high school friend of mine. Her name's Aya... " " Aya? You mean *the* Aya Nakagawa? " Hikaru nodded, before continuing. " Aah. We were still college freshmen back then. She was my first love...Although we were kinda close in the past, when I finally told her about my feelings, she became...distant and cold....It was like every time she sees me, all her warmth and friendship from the past seemed to be replaced by a mask of icy aloofness, as if she never knew me at all... " " I never talked to her again. I know that it isn't the best thing to do, but every time I see her, the pain and loneliness would always be there... " Hikaru closed his eyes, still feeling the remnants of his grief even after the years. " This was the time when I met Shinami. She was my classmate in a Sociology class during my freshman year. At that time, I was really lonely and desperately wanted someone to talk to, somebody who would help me face the pain. Shinami was the one who did that. She would always seem to brighten up my day by just being there...and..." Hikaru gave a deep sigh. " Perhaps that is why I easily fell in love with her... or... ...perhaps she reminded me too much of Aya when we were still in high school... " A moment of silence passed between them as Hikaru looked at Rin sadly. " I'm sorry. I shouldn't be dumping my problems on you... " Rin leaned closer to him, her eyes reflecting a deep sadness within them. " No, it's okay. I know it's really hard to get by without someone to talk to. Don't worry. I'm here to listen. " " Arigato, Rin-san. " Hikaru gave Rin a small smile, before continuing, " Yesterday, I told Shinami about my feelings... she... " " ...this morning when I tried to talk to her, she avoided me like a plague or something...I knew then...that the same thing's happening all over again... " Hikaru looked away, unable to continue. Then he felt something warm and soft touch his hand. Turning back to Rin, he saw that she had placed her hand on his, a sad expression on her face. " Rin-san?" Rin sighed. " I guess...we are both the same... " " The same? " Hikaru had a little look of surprise on his face. " Two years ago, I met this guy named Squall. Although he was good looking, he had an antisocial personality and was very direct and rude. Back then, I was in love with this other guy, but he had an accident and we all thought that he was dead... " " But I didn't really grieve much for him. I guess I wasn't in love with him, maybe it was only infatuation, but still... " " Anyway, Squall was the one who helped me back to my feet. By just being there whenever I need him, by just being his very self, he made me feel like I can do anything, like I can take on the world..." " He also started to change. He was no longer as rude nor tactless as before. Then we both realized we were in love with each other... " " But we had an accident. He...he almost died saving me. " Rin closed her eyes, a few tears sliding down her cheek. " When I recovered after the accident, I heard that he had lost his memories and disappeared, and right now, I'm still searching for him. " Rin brushed the tears from her cheek." I'm sorry, I must look like an idiot, crying like this. " " Iiieee, it's okay, " Hikaru told her. " We *are* the same...still searching for the right one in our life...although you have already met yours, while I... " " Don't worry, Hikaru-kun. I'm sure the right girl's just around the corner...You just have to look a little bit further, " Rin said, a peaceful yet sad expression slowly creeping into her features. All further conversation about their sad past was halted by the arrival of their food. Even as they ate, they still continued to talk, although this time, about less depressing matters. By the time they finished their meal, they were again both in good spirits. " Now, I'd better go. I still have some researching to do, " Rin told Hikaru as soon as they left the café. " Wait a minute, Rin-san. I..." Rin stopped in her tracks. " Hm? " " I wanted to ask why you told me those things...I mean, we had just met yesterday..." Rin gave him a mock-frown. " You also told me about yours..." Hikaru looked away, a little embarrassed. " Ah...ah...sou...but..." Rin gave him a secretive smile. " You really want to know? " Hikaru looked at Rin just in time to see a very amused expression on her face. " Perhaps, it's because you remind me too much of Squall, with that mark between your eyes. Ja ne. " Hikaru stared at Rin, dumbfounded, as she walked away. He didn't know whether to feel flattered or confused, touching the birthmark between his eyes. ***** Hikaru waved goodbye to Rin as she walked towards the gym. After five weeks of having lunch together everyday, their friendship dramatically rose from being acquaintances to being close friends. A hand clasped Hikaru's shoulder. " Yo Hikaru! You didn't tell me you're dating her. " Turning around, Hikaru stared right into the face of a mischievously grinning Kenichi. " I'm not dating her, Kenichi. " Hikaru brushed off Kenichi's hand from his shoulder. Whenever Hikaru saw Kenichi with that grin on his face, he always knew what was next. " We're just friends. " " Yeah, that's always how it was in the beginning. 'Yeah, we're just friends.' But later on, WHAM! 'Rin, I love you.' 'Hikaru, I love you, too. ' " Then Kenichi held his hands in front of him, closed his eyes and puckered his lips, as if he were kissing someone in the air in front of him. " Knock it off. " Kenichi had no idea how depressing Hikaru's past loves were. " You mean to tell me that you have absolutely no interest in her!? " Kenichi's eyes were wide in disbelief, his face creeping into a shocked, comical expression. " It's not that I really have no interest in her...it's just that...I'm not really ready for a relationship...plus she already has someone in her life... " " Really? Aww...that's too bad...Hikaru lost his chance at the pretty babe... Oh well, Hikaru better luck next time. " With that, Kenichi went on his way, but not before giving Hikaru a very amused wink. Hikaru mentally groaned. It was during these times that he just wanted to kick Kenichi in the spot where it *really* hurts. Well, at least for a guy anyway. As he walked back towards his dorm, Hikaru couldn't help thinking about Kenichi's words. < Am I really falling for Rin? My heart seems to tumble whenever she's there...> Hikaru shook his head. < I'm *not* falling for Rin. She already has Squall...but...why am I so afraid to fall in love again? > By the time Hikaru reached his empty dorm room, he realized that the reason was because he was afraid. Afraid that he might feel the pain and loneliness once more. < I'm not going to fall in love. I'm not going to ruin my friendship with Rin, > Hikaru mentally told himself as he entered his room, silently closing the door behind him. ***** It was dark when Rin left the gray, three-story building where the detective she had hired worked. As she slowly went on her way home, Rin quietly brooded on what the wiry old detective had told her. ***** " I'm sorry, Hoshino-san, " the detective had a sad look on his wrinkled face. " But so far, no results. I've searched hospitals, hotels, and even government records. Nothing indicates concrete evidence that someone with a name of Squall Leonhart nor matching the photo you gave me would have lived in Japan nor entered it from a foreign country. I am truly sorry. Perhaps it might help if I consulted with my colleagues in other countries... " " Iiyo, " Rin interrupted. " Thank you for the offer though.... " ***** < Squall, where are you? > Looking up to the serene, night sky, she sighed. < Please, Squall. I...need you. I'm already...so tired of...searching... > As she reached her home, she climbed up the stairs that lead to her rented apartment, where she was greeted by a large, brown dog with a white coat of fur underneath. " Hello Angelo. " Rin knelt down and shook the dog's ears after setting down her things in a nearby table. The dog, as if sensing her depressed mood, gave a small whimper, as it nuzzled her cheek with its nose. " When, Angelo? When will I find Squall? " Placing her arm around her dog, Rin let a few tears escape from her eyes. " It's been two years since we both stepped into this world...we've been to many places...met many people...did many things...but we still haven't found Squall... Angelo...I don't know what to do..." Outside, a shooting star streaked across the night sky, disappearing in the horizon, as small sobs could be heard from inside the apartment, where a girl grieved from the absence of someone so dear... Author's Notes: Well, that took a lot of effort to write. I've finally finished the first chapter of Another Life. This story has been inside my head for quite a long time ever since I finished Final Fantasy VIII Japanese version. For comments and criticisms, email at heero9@geocities.com., but please take it in mind that this is my first fanfic ALONE. (The first was Tsuki no Wing, but I'm with Duo, and the rest, so the writing style will probably better there than here.) This fic was inspired by the Final Fantasy VIII game and Rinoa Heartily. Translation Notes: Gomen/ Gomen nasai : Sorry/I'm sorry. Iiyo : rough translation >> combination of "That's enough" and "It's alright" Iiieee : rough translation >> combination of "No" and "That's not it" De mo : But Irrashai : Welcome Chotto matte : Wait a minute Arigato : Thank you Ohayou : Good morning Doshitano : What's wrong? Anou/ Anou sa : a sort of expression. Roughly like, "well..." Okaasan : Mother Oyasumi/Oyasumi nasai : Good night Neh : a sort of expression Aah/ Un : expression of affirmation Honti ni daijobu : Are you really all right? Kairu masho : Let' go home Jodan : way of saying "It's a joke" Nandemo/heiki : It's nothing Mou : sort of expression Shimatta : Japanese equivalent of "Damnit" Well, you 'd better want to read the translation notes, since I'll not be putting them in future chapters. DON'T email me asking for the translation of a certain Japanese word in my fic. Of course I'll put the translation of new words used, but...-_- As you can see, being a CS Major makes me so busy that I can only check my mail 4 or 5 times a week. Copyright: Final Fantasy VIII and all other logos, descriptions, trademarks, etc. are properties of Squaresoft. Hikaru Shino and other things included in this fic that are not theirs are properties of the author, namely me. If you want to borrow them for some reason, email me first. I've worked hard to make a good storyline for this, and I wouldn't appreciate the fact that someone would just steal my creation. Oops. Forgot to mention the ABCB Cafe is from Kimagure Orange Road and is the property of its creator, so it isn't mine. Just wanted cameo something there. Exepct more cameos from other anime and possibly games, in later chapters. Wing Heart Finished, September 15,1999 Edited, December 7,1999