By: Jackie Chiang

Notes:

This fanfic is written somewhat similarly to the form in which "Minako"was written. There will be periods of third person narrative, and then some first person narrative as well. This was inspired by a question brought up in the SM newsgroup (alt.fan.sailor-moon): Which character's death would have the most impact? The choice is obvious so I decided to go where my thoughts led me. I have chose to ignore some important paradox factors, such as the fact that the Outer Senshi would have to disappear too (i.e. Pluto would never have appeared as was from the future, and then Neptune and Uranus would have to disappear since Pluto saved their lives in S), but I think it's better this way. I'm sorry that it kind of gets funky near the end, but I kind of needed to finish it. Oh yeah, I sort of alternate between the pretty obvious Japanese and English words (arigato - thank you and sayonara- good-bye); I dunno why I did it, so just live with it, I suppose.

The characters in this story belong to Takeuchi Naoko and all respective companies with rights. They are being used without their permission. I did NOT IN ANY WAY COPY ANYONE ELSE'S FANFIC. I hardly read any anymore, k? Dealing with "Serena and Darien", it is not a rip-off of "Odyssies" or whatnot. I believe that I wrote it first, and I still have no idea where this series is or if it even exists. No lawsuits or complaints that I copied you, because I didn't. Comprende?

It is recommended respectively by the author that you listen to the violin music from Sailor Moon Sailor Stars; the one in which Mamoru and Usagi get engaged. It doesn't have any words, and it suits the mood fairly well.

Silence. The rain poured around them, drenching them, their clothes. They took no note of the rain, though they involuntarily shivered. They refused to leave. They were going to stay until it was over. The cold wind encompassed the guests, blowing their clothes and hair about them.

The girl in a black suit pushed up the brim of her hat ever so slightly, not listening to the priest. It was then she noticed that some of them were crying. She felt like crying too, but her pride would not allow it.

Guilt, anger, and hopelessness filled her heart. She swallowed, her throat dry. Warm tears fell from her face, mingling with the rain. At least they would never know that she had cried. She empathized with everyone of them, for their loss.

She averted her eyes from _him_. The man's face was a mask of grief. He clutched the bouquet of flowers tightly. To lose two people that he had been so closely tied to was weighing heavily upon him. It was evident in his hurt eyes, which stared blankly at the priest.

She moved her eyes on towards the family. The young boy attempted to keep his composure, but was fighting a losing battle.

The mother's face was stricken, sobbing into her hands. Her husband had a comforting arm around her shoulder, though it looked like he hadn't slept for weeks. Both of them looked so very, very old.

She turned her head until she reached the group of four older girls. The blonde and blue-green haired girl stood under one umbrella, the green haired woman and the short black haired girl under another. They were very calm, almost serene, and at a first glance, one would think that they were at ease. But she knew better. Under the facades of tranquillity were anguish and the feelings of loss that they all had become too familiar with.

The blue-green haired girl looked into her eyes. She looked away,unable to handle what she found in their blue midsts.

Shifting her gaze, she found herself watching her three best friends. All of them had the black rings beneath their eyes that was characteristic of all of the others as well. Distress, sorrow,and misery mirrored the faces of them. So young, so much love to give, so many destinies to achieve...

The girl remembered a conversation that she had had with her before. "What do you want to be one day, Rei-chan?""I want to be a singer or an actress or a model. You know. How about you? You're going to marry Mamoru-san one day, right, Usagi?"

"Well, um..."

"Of course you are!"

Her eyes watered, and she angrily wiped the tears away, but they continued relentlessly. I'm so sorry, Usagi-chan...

The priest was nearly finished. "Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh," he added in the last part as consolation. He threw some ashes onto the fresh grave and stepped away.

She clutched the flower so tightly that blood appeared. 'The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh?' That was their answer to everything. Deal with it, live with it, move on in life. God this, God that. Oh, ministers were indeed evil creatures.

Slowly, she moved forward towards the grave. She dropped the single yellow rose on it. The others followed suit. Mamoru was last, placing a bouquet of red roses on the grave,turning away sharply.

She walked away from the site, wanting to be alone. She felt a pressure on her arm. Looking back, she saw that it was Michiru tightly holding her.

"Rei-chan," she said softly yet firmly, "now is the time when we need each other the most..."

Rei nodded, understanding the wisdom of the request. Her friends walked up to her, and Rei realized how much they all depended on each other, when their dearest friend, light, and hope was now gone.

Recalling that day is always painful, but a necessity to accepting it and living on. No, she did not die as a Sailor Senshi; she died as the innocent, loving girl Usagi, which is harder to take. She was leaving my temple after a party. We were all there, except for Mamoru; he was working late. Chibi Usa and Usagi were walking home alone, as all the girls lived in different areas. Haruka and Michiru offered to drive anyone home, but the others declined.

It was fairly dark and late, and Chibi Usa and Usagi weren't too far away from the temple. As they were crossing the road, a car came speeding by, the driver obviously drunk. Usagi instinctively pushed

Chibi Usa out of the way, but in doing so tripped. A hit and run incident...

Chibi Usa ran back to the temple for help, screaming and sobbing. Fortunately, Haruka and Michiru were still around, talking to and Ami and myself. We rushed Usagi to the hospital immediately where she was put in the intensive care area. We managed to contact all of our friends and Usagi's family; they arrived frightened and worried.

We all waited to hear how Usagi was and stayed throughout the night, much to the dismay of the hospital staff. When the doctor came out,he told us that it was too late... Usagi had broken several of her ribs and various bones in her body, had internal bleeding, and received severe brain damage. She would not survive for another two hours.

Shock overtook us. Usagi's mother gasped and started to cry comforted by Usagi's father. Mamoru was frozen, unable to move. No, this couldn't be happening. Not to Usagi! She was supposed to grow, mature, marry Mamoru, rule Crystal Tokyo! No, the doctor was wrong. Usagi would get better... She _had_ to get better!

"May we see her?"

"No, it would be-"

"Please!" A desperate cry.

"... Very well."

We filed into the room. Usagi's family crowded around the bed next to their unconscious daughter. Her face was bruised and battered, her head swathed in bandages. Much of her body was hidden from view;all for the better. I do not think we could have bared to see all of her injuries. Various tubes went from her nose, neck, and arms to a machine. A second machine measured her vital signs, and indicated that she was very, very close to death. Her eyes were closed, her body still, lifeless.

Usagi's parents whispered to her, pleading with her not to die. She gave no response. Finally, her father had to take her mother outside,as she was sobbing uncontrollably. We were all motionless, unsure of what to say, what to do.

Mamoru walked forward first. Kneeling down next to her bed, he held her cold, white hand. Tears were in his eyes. "Usako," he whispered, his voice soft and filled with anguish, "don't leave us.

We all need you... Chibi Usa needs you... _I_ need you. We all love you so much..."

I turned my head away, as did everyone else. It was too painful to watch Mamoru pour out his love for his girlfriend, his would-be wife, the girl he had loved for eternity. Poor Mamoru. His whole family was gone, and now the one person who had filled it with love and life was dying.

Mamoru finished, standing up. He left the room abruptly, which was understandable. Chibi Usa started after him, but Setsuna stopped her. "No, Small Lady," she said quietly, "he needs time alone. He will be back."

The four older girls went next, desperately pleading with Usagi to return to them. All were reduced to tears as they put up a brave front, Haruka taking it especially hard. They respectively stood up, Michiru squeezing Haruka's hand tightly. They returned to their places.

Makoto, Minako, and Ami went up separately. I didn't concentrate on what they were saying as it was private for each of them. Instead, I watched what they did. They all held her hand and cried, their eyes desperate and imploring.

Chibi Usa quietly went up to Usagi, calling her 'Mama.' She cried a lot too, trying to hug Usagi. She kept saying that she didn't hate her; she was sorry for being a pain and for annoying her. We all looked on in shock as her body started to fade, then reappear, but she bravely dealt with the pain and stayed by her mother's side. Finally Hotaru gently pulled her away and led her outside.

I nervously proceeded to Usagi's side, unsure of myself. I held her hand. It was so cold, like a block of ice. "Usagi," I whispered,smiling weakly at her white face, "I'm sorry for always bullying you and teasing you... You know I never meant that right? I hope you did... I never wanted to ever hurt you... Usagi! Wake up! You have to get better! You need to get better!" My voice got hysterical.

Ami put her hand on my shoulder, but I shrugged it off.

"Usagi!

Remember? You promised never to leave us, liar!" My voice became quieter again. "Remember our conversation about what we wanted to be? I'm sorry that you'll, you'll never... I'm so sorry, Usagi, for everything. I love you so much. Don't go!" Crying hard onto her sheets, I held her hand.

A hand fell onto my shoulder. I turned around to see Michiru there. "Rei-chan," she said softly, "she's gone..." I heard the toneless beeping of the machine, filling the room with a dreadful coldness, and the awful screams of Hotaru from outside, and our lives were changed forever...

"A time paradox?" Hotaru asked quietly. She sat unmoving, not drinking her tea. No one was. They were grouped around a table in the cafe, no one saying very much, everyone's face haggard with sadness and loss. Mamoru was no where to be seen, as after the burial service he had left immediately.

Setsuna nodded, her dark eyes staring out of a window, where the rain was continuing to pour down. "It's only a matter of time before things will change...''

Michiru looked at the ceiling, as if trying to control herself. "That explains Chibi Usa. She was erased from time, wasn't she?"

Setsuna avoided eye contact with anyone. "Yes," she whispered, her voice breaking, "with Usagi's death, there was no way Small Lady could have remained here, for she was her daughter..."

They were silent, motionless, except for the involuntary movement of Haruka, who was stirring her tea unnecessarily with a spoon, not really realizing that it wasn't coffee.

"No!" Makoto said. "There must be _something_ we can do! There has to be!"

No one answered. No one could say anything that would bring consolation to any of the others.

"Couldn't we use the time gate to go back and prevent what happened?" Minako suggested desperately, knowing the answer.

"No. Tampering with time is too serious. We might inadvertently create more problems, and it might not bring Usagi or Small Lady back..."

Rei said nothing, staring at nothing but her happy memories with Usagi. Usagi is gone forever. I'm so sorry, Usagi, so sorry. I wish I could do it all over again. I wouldn't tease you this time or make fun of you, I swear! Oh, Usagi, can you hear me?

At last, Rei stood up. "Gomen, minna," she muttered, "but I need to be alone." She needed to leave before she started to break. She ran out of the cafe before anyone could say a word. She walked home in the rain, drenching her, recalling belatedly that her umbrella was in the cafe.

She had never felt more alone in her life. No matter what anyone had ever said, she had cared for Usagi deeply, more than any of her other friends. Not that she would ever show anyone that side of her. And now her other friends' departures. How could life be cruel to take away Chibi Usa as well? It wasn't fair. Shivering, she hugged herself tightly to conserve warmth. The rain blurred her vision. She reached her temple and ran across the street, narrowly missed by an oncoming car. But she didn't care. Not with Usagi gone. Nothing mattered anymore.

Sobbing, she ran into her room where she took out a picture of all of her friends and herself. Everyone was there, happy, and alive. Usagi and Chibi Usa were sitting in the front of the picture with the three cats. Behind them, Rei was kneeling behind Usagi, giving her rabbit ears. Ami, Minako, and Makoto were next to Rei, respectively. In the third row were Mamoru, Haruka, Michiru,Hotaru, and Setsuna standing. She remembered the day the picture was taken. They all had gone to the park for a picnic;it was one of the happiest times of her life, and she had always remembered it fondly. She knew now that they were in the past, and those times would never come back again.

Usagi...

Haruka cried. Not feminine, teary cries, but heart wrenching, violent sobs that were still silent. The rest of us were stunned,unmoving. Hotaru's strangled screams invaded the air.

The rest of it was like a dream. Doctors and nurses rushed in, checking Usagi's pulse and trying to revive her. Each time I prayed that this would be the one to save her, and everything would be better. But each time I knew that she was gone forever, and that nothing they could do would ever help her again.

"She's gone where she can be happy," the doctor said haltingly to us as the others left. He sounded unsure even as he repeated the same thing he said to everyone, everyone who had lost a loved one.

"Don't give me that shit," Haruka whispered, her voice tense and low, anguished. She turned on him. "Don't give me any of your little, practiced speeches. Get out of here! GO!"

The doctor, surprised and scared, backed away from her and into the hallway. Haruka's face was streaked with tears, and I was somewhat surprised to feel moisture on my face as well. Michiru, Ami, and Minako were all crying, Michiru, silently, Ami, her shoulders shaking, Minako loudly. Setsuna was still, unmoving, and I saw the light of the room reflect off the tears in her eyes. Makoto was simply watching Usagi's still body with a look I have never seen before, but which soon became so familiar- a look of utter hopelessness, utter blankness.

Hotaru was led in by a nurse, who gave her a blanket. Hotaru was sobbing violently as she sat down, and Setsuna went to comfort her. It was then I realized for the first time that ChibiUsa had been taken away as well... Hotaru's first true friend, the cute little girl,the symbol of the King and Queen of Crystal Tokyo. Gone, vanished, removed.

My life was falling apart before my eyes, and there was nothing to hold it together.

Rei awoke in the early morning, before dawn. She grasped something in her hand. She looked down. The ginzuishou. How did she have it? Hadn't Usagi been buried with the brooch on...?

Ignoring it, she changed into her normal street clothes and stuffed it into her pocket.

She ran outside and to the dock. The dock. This was where Usagi had always gone too, always loved to think, which had been rare. A tiny canoe was tied up, and without thinking, Rei climbed into it. She was about to push off when she saw a figure standing over her. It was Michiru. Rei smiled faintly.

"Rei-chan," Michiru murmured, glancing away. It was an odd tone,reflecting the inner turmoil that she was experiencing."We must talk."

Rei nodded slowly, and indicated with her hand that Michiru should get into the canoe as well. The other girl did so, and Rei pushed away from the dock. She stroked the paddle into the water, deep, careful ones until they were in the middle of the lake. The sun was just beginning to creep over the hills, and it was faintly chilly. The air was still; nothing moved.

Michiru was silent, her eyes focused on the water. Her hand drifted into the water, and she stroked the edge of the tiny waves with her fingers.

"We must all deal with Usagi's death," she whispered, very softly, but Rei could still hear her. "We all are battling with this...

But you, Haruka, and Mamoru are taking all of the things that have happened onto yourselves..."

Rei said nothing, waiting for her to continue.

"There is nothing that you could have done to prevent what happened... You must realize this..." She paused.

Rei watched her, knowing that she was holding something back. When Michiru looked up, she knew that she was right. The eyes were haunted, filled with agony and suffering. Eyes full of shock and disbelief, and a strange uncertainty.

"What happened?" Rei whispered hoarsely. Something was so terribly wrong, she could feel it. It could only be one thing, and she was surer of this than anything else she had ever felt before.

"Mamoru- he..." Michiru started to cry, muffling the sounds with her hands.

The dark haired girl made no reply, tears streaking down her face. So he had. "When?" she asked after a few minutes of watching nothing, seeing nothing, feeling nothing.

"Yesterday, after the funeral." The blue-green haired girl had composed herself, biting her lip gently. She stared into space, not really seeing Rei. "He... jumped off a cliff..."

"The cliff..." The same one? Yes. The one that had affected his life so inevitably, so it should only be fitting that he go from there.

"He's with Usagi now..." Michiru whispered to herself, as if consolation. "They're together..."

"Yes."

"Odd that it should have turned out this way," Michiru said, without malice, or bitterness, or sarcasm. "Who would have thought..."

Silence.

"I thought that you should be the first to know," she continued quietly. "The Mirror told me of his death, but there are some things that the Mirror will never be able to do..."

"Michiru-san," Rei uttered, her voice desperate, "do you think she realized? She knew?"

Michiru smiled gently. "She knew, Rei-chan. She knew, and she loved you."

Rei's lips turned up half-heartedly, knowing that Michiru was right with her mind, but not with her heart. "I want to believe you..."

The other girl looked at her for a long time, accepting Rei's feelings. She could not truly believe herself either. "One day, we will all know that Usagi forgave us for anything that we ever did..."

"Mars!" The scream was angry and pleading. "Move!"

Mars stood her ground, not willing to leave. The creature proceeded with its unrelentless attack, sending beam after beam at her. She scarcely felt the pain as she fell to her knees.

"DAMNIT, MOVE!" Uranus shouted, running and knocked her out of the way. She took the brunt of the attack and finally collapsed next to the others.

"Usagi can't help us," Mars murmured, her eyes blank. "ChibiUsa-chan and Mamoru-san can't help us either. What is the point of living without them?"

Neptune slapped her across the face, crying. "Mars, stop thinking like that. They wouldn't have wanted us to die."

The monster took that time to send a beam at Neptune and she crashed to the ground.

"Neptune!" The cry was an eye opener. She had to stop thinking so selfishly and help her friends. Standing up, she shouted, "Mars Flame Sniper!"

The monster shrugged it off easily. Shock went through Mars. Fireproof. How could she defeat it now?

It snarled angrily. Giving her a swift kick in the stomach, it proceeded to throw more beams at her. She fell onto her side,groaning in pain. From her fuku fell the ginzuishou, and she glanced at it painfully from the corner of her eye.

The creature prepared for the attack, and Mars inwardly whispered for her friends to forgive her for not saving them in time.

"Stop..." a voice, so familiar, whispered. A wave of white light washed over everything, and the monster disintegrated in a second, while reviving the others from their unconsciousness.

"Usagi-chan," Mars murmured when she could see, unable to believe her eyes. For standing there was Usagi smiling softly at them, surrounded in a white light, in her princess dress, holding a scepter. But this was not Serenity. This was Usagi, the girl that they all had loved so deeply and knew so well.

"Usagi-chan!" the others whispered, each wondering if they were dreaming or dead.

"Minna-chan," Usagi said softly, "I have come to say good-bye..." She smiled again, gently, floating towards them. She landed in front of Mercury, holding her hand.

"Ami-chan, I shall always remember your love and care, your intelligence, and the way you always tried to push me ahead."

Mercury smiled wobbily, tears brimming in her eyes. She nodded slowly. "Arigato, Usagi-chan. I love you."

The blond girl moved onwards to Venus. "Minako-chan, I always loved your vivaciousness and the way that you always thought of the good in people."

Venus started to cry while attempting to appear happy. She couldn't say anything, but she gave Usagi a brief hug.

"Mako-chan," she murmured to Jupiter, "you are a sweet, talented girl, no matter what people say... Remember that in the future."

Jupiter felt herself losing control and she too wept softly, almost as if she felt a good deal happier. "Good-bye, Usagi-chan..."

"Hotaru-chan," Usagi murmured, for she had stopped in front of the young girl in purple. "Always loving and kind, a dear with incredible strength. Thank you for everything."

Saturn hugged Usagi tightly, for Usagi had been her second friend,and she had stood up for her no matter what. "No, thank you, Usagi-chan."

Usagi moved to Pluto, who immediately knelt in front of her respectively. Usagi gently brought her to stand up. "Setsuna-san,I know how close you and ChibiUsa-chan were... She's with me now, and she will always love you and Hotaru-chan, as will I."

Pluto smiled, and she bowed to Usagi, her way of showing how much that had meant to her.

"Haruka-san..."

Uranus did not look down, turning her head away. "I failed you, Princess. I was supposed to protect you; that was my duty. But I wasn't there when you needed me. In a way, I killed you." Her voice was harsh, and her eyes stung.

She was surprised when she felt a warm hand on her face that drew her head to face Usagi. "Haruka-san... What happened wasn't your fault. It never was. Please, don't blame yourself. I could never blame you." She lightly kissed Uranus on the cheek.

Uranus smiled slightly, pulling one of Usagi's ponytails affectionately. "Good-bye, odango atama," she whispered.

Neptune quickly moved to kneel down, her eyes unsure. "Princess..."

Usagi stopped her, giving her a cute grin. "Don't pull the Setsuna thing on me, ok?"

Neptune laughed shakily. "Hai, Princess... We wanted you to be happy, Usagi-chan... We so desperately wanted that... I'm sorry that you never fulfilled your dreams..."

Usagi gave her a quiet look. "Michiru-san," she said, her eyes loving, her voice kind, "I was happy. I was happy because I was with all of you, and that is what matters. Good-bye."

Neptune kissed her on the cheek. "Sayonara, Princess."

Mars had been standing away from them all, confused. How could Usagi forgive _her_ after everything she had done to her? The teasing, the taunting, the malice? If she were her, she would never excuse her for the injustices that she had done.

"Rei-chan." The voice was soft. "I never blamed you for anything that you did to me, never. I always knew that you cared for me... It hurts me that one of my best friends has so many fears, guilts, and troubles."

She held out her hand. The ginzuishou lay in her palm, glowing brightly. She set it in Mars's hand. "Here. I want you to take care of this for me... So maybe one day things will work out...

Take care, Rei-chan. I will always be with you... Remember me... Sayonara..."

"Usagi-chan!" Mars whispered. Usagi smiled, waving good-bye to them one last time before walking away into a mist. She vanished.

"Usagi..." Mars started to cry softly, falling to the ground. "Please... don't go... I need you..."

"Rei-chan." Neptune knelt down next to her. "She loves you. Usagi will always be with us, in our hearts, and in our souls."

The breeze flittered, and the ginzuishou flashed, as if in agreement, and Mars smiled slowly, nodding, realizing how much Usagi had cared. "Arigato, Usagi-chan. Arigato."

Days past, weeks, months, years. As I stand watching over their graves, I bend down to place fresh roses there. Usagi and Mamoru's graves are next to each other,forever entwined. Usagi, Mamoru, and ChibiUsa...All together. I often wonder where they are, and if they are happy.

And then a breeze rustles my hair, and strands float past me, and I watch contentedly. They are. The ginzuishou knows. It always has and always will. At peace, I smile softly, knowing that they are watching us, guarding us, our friends for eternity, reaching over the void of death.

I have learned a lesson that shall forevermore be with me. Life and death are one.

The End