BRIEF SYNOPSIS: In high school, I wrote, produced, directed
and starred in a series of videos for my advanced Spanish class, called
the "Channel 79" Series. The
following selection is a tongue-in-cheek "editorial" given by Joan
Walters, a middle-aged anchorwoman for the Channel 79 news, about the
limited parking space available on our high school campus.
This is an original work produced by this author. Please do not copy or
use without permission.
From "Channel 79 Special Report: Honduras," by Heather Holder
Joan: What's all this I hear about student parking problems?
Every year, we hear more and more about all the problems the students
are having parking their cars on campus. Shouldn't we instead be hearing
about how grateful they are to even have cars? You know, when I was a
student at Rose Bud High School, we weren't allowed to even have cars.
We had to walk to school, no matter what the weather was like. It used
to snow like crazy around here, sometimes as much as ten feet deep. We
still had to walk. The buildings were not as close together as they are
today either. It was, as I reacall, a little over ten miles from the
music building to the main high school building. Due to a peculiar
geographic setup, it was uphill both ways, too! I remember one day
when I was on my way to freshmen English, and I had to shoot a mountain
lion to get there on time. And now the kids are complaining about parking
places??? Why, I was on the way to art in my sophomore year, and I had to
get past a grizzly bear that was foraging for food behind the cafeteria!
I discovered I had forgotten my rifle, so I killed the bear instead with
my looseleaf notebook. I wasn't worried about a parking place then,
I can tell you! So, in conclusion, I want to tell the students to be glad
that they have cars, the buildings are closer together, and we live in
the land of the free and the home of the brave. Thank you.
