Ted's Childhood: the Stain of Illegitimacy

Ted's Childhood
the stain of illegitimacy

Illegitimacy has always been a touchy subject as well as a misrepresented one. In 1946, the subject was not broached at all. Women and girls who were pregnant out of wedlock hid out of shame and often concocted incredible stories to explain unexpected children. One of the favorites was claiming the child as a brother or sister rather than a son or daughter. The second most popular method was to move out of town until after the child was born and come back with a "war orphan" , a child whose father died in WWII and whose mother died of an illness and left the child to the single mother. Older widows often didn't make these claims, a child born to a woman who had been widowed for several years was not an uncommon occurance. And common law marriage, cohabitating without a marriage license, was well, common.

Despite the rhetoric about the "good old days" there are truly more illigitimate offspring from past generations than most would like to admit. So Ted's childhood, growing up illigitimate, was not as much of a stigma as generally thought. He was further protected by his distance from his extended family who would know about it, and by his stepfather, Johnnie Bundy.

The only person who really cared about Ted's illigitimacy was Ted himself.

Why was Bundy obsessed with the manner of his birth? Since he and Johnnie Bundy never saw eye to eye, knowing that he wasn't really Johnny's son may have been a relief to Ted. Ted would be able to sever all ties with his stepfather.

Ted was facinated by appearances and he was ambitious. He wanted to present himself as flawless to the world and illigitimacy was a flaw. Lacking the true greatness that could turn flaws into assets or at least inconsequential details, Ted focused ont he one flaw that could not be changed and blew it out of perspective. Instead of either modeling himself after great men who were illigitimate like William I of England or Jack London, the writer, or simply accepting his birth and downplaying it, he let this become the excuse for his failures.

Of course there is a much darker side than blind ambition. Bundy might have felt that he should have never been born, that he was truly outside all of society. He had proof that he was a mistake and unwanted, and this was the reason he needed to cross society's biggest boundaries, murder.

Like most psychopaths, Bundy had no true perspective of himself and of people around him. Just as he imagined that people would hold his illigitimacy against him, he also didn't stop to think how many legitimate children have been born who were "mistakes" as well. How many marriages were performed less than nine months before the birth. Or how many girls were born before the son finally arrived. Or those "change of life" babies who suprise women once they believe that they were past dirty diapers. If he was truly an unwanted outcast then they were too.

And finally the last reason that Ted had a problem with his birth. He truly hated his mother for his illigitimacy. Her mistakes would never be overcome in Ted's unyielding eyes. As children we believe that our parents are perfect, as teenagers we are angered by their weaknesses, as adults we can see our parents as people. Ted, the perpetual child, could never reconcile his mother's weaknesses with the rest of humanity's.

If you liked this java, I found it at The Omega Factor