November 1, 1998
11:40 PM
One of the oft-discussed topics in the online journaling community is "What's your motivation for keeping an online journal?"
Actually, I have several motivations. Among them are: having an outlet for pent up feelings and frustrations, an opportunity for feedback from people who see things from a different viewpoint, and as an exercise for my writing skills.
Another big reason I do this, is to hold on to memories, so I can look back, down the road, and say, "Yeah, I remember that..." and to remember the times that don't stand out, as well.
I was listening to some of my CDs and stitching this afternoon, and this Billy Joel song caught my attention:
Did you know that before you came into my life
It was some kind of miracle that I survived.
Some day we will both look back
And have to laugh
We lived through a lifetime
And the aftermath.
This is the time to remember
'Cause it will not last forever
These are the days to hold on to
'Cause we won't, although we'll want to.
These are the times
But time is gonna change
I know we've got to move somehow
But I don't want to lose you, now.
Sometimes it's so easy
To let a day
Slip on by
Without ever seeing each other at all
But this is the time you'll turn back to and so will I
And those will be days you can never recall
So often, when we're caught up in the busyness of life these days, little moments slip by unnoticed; sweet little things that a loved one may say or do get forgotten, amdist the noise and confusion.
Keeping a journal is one way I have of holding on to those precious little memories: what it feels like to be wrapped up safe and warm in Jevim's arms, or how relaxing it is to be able to lie here in the evenings and listen to him breathing softly as he sleeps. Or just how soothing the sound of the rain on the roof is, or the beauty of a flame-red maple as autumn takes hold. These are the things I want to savor and remember. And maybe someone else may enjoy reading about them as well.
Looking back, many of my journal entries have been of the "grocery list" variety -- "Today I did this, this, this, this and this." It helps when I'm trying to figure out what I did on the 37th of Janucember, but I've always wanted the journal to be more than that. This month, that's my goal: to dig deeper, explain why I do this thing I do, how I feel about things, what I believe, and what I want to accomplish in life. A tall order, but I'm going to give it a shot. If you have comments, questions, or suggestions, feel free to e-mail me, or post a message in the forum or the guestbook. Feedback is always appreciated.
For now, it's past my bedtime. Goodnight!
