This page is dedicated to the topic of domestic violence.
My user name for Geocities (been_there) was easy to pick. I truly have "been there, done that."
At first I thought I had "changed" into a different person, a new person, but in reality I became the
person I always was and was meant to be. It has been, and still is, a process not an event.
While it seems like light years ago, only about 8 years have passed since I left the abusive relationship that gave me the OJT to write this page as a survivor -- not a victim -- of domestic violence.
I chose this place as a home for my pages due to the intensely personal nature of the topic. Here I
can go very close to the bone in a way I do not yet feel comfortable on my personal page.
In the intervening years since I first wrote this, Geocities/Yahoo removed my anonymity when one purchased the other and made these pages associated with my yahoo ID. No matter. Everything happens for a reason and it was time. All the rest holds true. It's an ongoing process -- not an event and with the benefit of time (now 15 years) and distance, I can wish the following for you with a full heart; not one battered and bruised but healing.
And God bless all of you work in the field of domestic violence. If you hadn't been there for me, I might not be here today.
Thank you.
Here's another update. A happy, second marriage in its 8th year. Son has graduated from college and started his career - not happy about the motorcycle but he likes it and that's what counts. His father is no longer a part of my life but regrettably still sinks his talons into his son on occasion. I counsel when asked, keep my mouth shut the rest of the time. For example, when his father informed the son's girlfriend of his son's questions about their relationship and its long term possibilities, that took the cake in my book. His son is always willing to give him another chance. Love and hope is amazing, isn't it. As long as you don't get pulverized in the process by loving and trusting someone who is not worthy of that love and trust.
If you are...
...a survivor, I wish you healing and peace.
...currently in an abusive relationship, I wish you safety.
...an abuser looking to understand "why", I wish you help.
...an inquiring mind, I wish you awareness.
Welcome again to my web site.
Taking a collective deep breath -
Ready? Let's begin.