One book I have enjoyed is"Celibacy: a Way of Loving,Living, and Serving" by A.W. Sipe. I will include some comments from the book and hopefully you will want to read the whole thing.

Plus Susan Muto, Ph.D. has written many books that are excellent.

"This way of life is a real struggle in a day and age when people so casually separate sexuality from spirituality."

"on the level of consecration there is no separation between Christian celibacy and Christian marriage. Both states of life represent human responsesto a calling from God. Both are vocations requiring commitment to people entrusted to one's care as members of Christ's body. Both ..consecrate their humanity to unfold,with the help of grace, Christ's redemptive plan for all ages."

"the celibate life is one way to foster intimacy with Christ; marriage is another. Both can become a meaningless burden,devoid of life giving possibilities, unless one periodically rekindles of life giving possibilities, unless one periodically rekindles and renews the commitment to give oneself to Christ and others in joyful surrender." Quotes by Susan Muto Ph.D.

In response to the topic: Celibacy by Chris
"hold the estrogen wagon here.... i don't think drawing the inference that all of the women professing a preference for celibacy had "bad experiences with men"...

alot of things change. like hormone levels. as women's estrogen levels drop, so does libido.... this isn't something we consciously choose necessarily but it is clearly reflected in feelings.

in the hysterectomy group to which i belong, there are a number of women who speak with longing about a lack of interest and ability to perform sexually following surgical removal of ovaries. (doctors are apparently still being taught in medical school that ovaries are nonessential after baby making is done -- WRONG!)

this isn't due to a lack of creativity or to a given sexual preference, but to a very real change in hormone production. got questions? read "Screaming to be Heard".

most of the women in this other group would be thrilled to desire their husbands or partners as fully as they did pre-ovarian removal -- and to have the lubrication and the sensations which they had -- also presurgery.

additionally, alot of women going into menopause -- whether it's surgical or natural -- suffer a loss of thyroid production too... that also affects how you feel, your energy levels as well as your moods and abilities to feel sexy."

In response to the topic: Celibacy by Maria
" First, I'm married and have been celibate for eight years. When I was eleven years old, I was raped by a neighbor. I never told anyone. At nineteen, I was beaten almost to death by my first husband. At twenty, I was rapedby someone I knew, at knifepoint. At twenty-three, my live-in boyfriend broke my arm. And I'm a "typical" white, middle-class woman, raised in a "typical" white, middle-class neighborhood, with a "typical" white, middle-class family.

Post menopause (by surgery), I still had safe, healthy, enjoyable sex with my husband. We had a two-year separation, during which time both he and I had other lovers. We've been back together now for ten years.

I got to a point in my life where I didn't want just sex, and lovemaking took too much time and energy. I was working, entered a Master's program, my daughter's marriage had ended, and my father was seriously ill. My husband was working two jobs(trying to decide which had a future). We got to the obligatory "just sex" point, and decided it wasn't what either of us wanted.

I've freed up so much energy, I've managed to do things I never thought I could. My husband began missing sex (lovemaking . . . this one doesn't need to be argued at this point), but respected what celibacy meant to me. He may be having affairs for all I know; I really don't care. He comes home to me and is the familiar face I fell in love with all those years ago. We get along well and have no desire to separate or get divorced.

So it seems there are a lot of reasons people choose celibacy, and all of them can be argued until hell freezes over."

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