True or False.....

Domestic violence affects only a small number of people.

FALSE

According to the FBI, 1 out of every 4 women is a victim of domestic violence at least once in her lifetime.

In 55% of the cases where men are assaulting their partners, they are also assaulting their children. The battered mother may be suffering from such physical and psychological injuries that she cannot meet the needs of her children appropriately.

Battering is just a momentary loss of temper.

FALSE

The Surgeon General of the United States reports that 1 out of 5 women battered by their partners have been victimized over and over again by the same person.

The American Medical Association defines domestic violence as an ongoing, debilitating experience of physical, psychological, and/or sexual abuse.

Domestic violence does not produce serious injuries.

FALSE

The leading cause of injury for women age 15 to 44 is domestic violence.

The Michigan State Police statistics show that a woman is killed by a partner or former partner every 5 days in Michigan.

Leaving an abusive relationship is easy.

FALSE

A study by the United States Department of Justice states that the most dangerous time for a woman who is being battered is when she leaves.

In Michigan, 75% of the women who are killed by their partners are murdered after the relationship is over or as it ends.

5. Battered women always stay in violent relationships.

FALSE

Many battered women do leave their abusers permanently and succeed in building a life free of violence.

Almost all battered women leave at least once.

6. Only poor and minority groups are victims of domestic violence.

FALSE

People of all socio-economic classes, races, religions, ethnic backgrounds, and sexual orientations can be victims of domestic violence.

7. Only married women are victims of domestic violence.

FALSE

People who are dating, separated, living together, divorced, have a child in common and/or are married, can be abused. Domestic violence can occur in any of these relationships.

8. Women are just as violent as men.

In 97% of domestic assaults, the man is the perpetrator of the violence.

Domestic Violence is Widespread

In 1996, the New York City Police Department received 217,236 emergency calls for family disputes. (NYPD)

In 1992, 7 percent of American women (3.9 million) who were married or living with someone as a couple were physically abused; 37 percent (20.7 million) were verbally or emotionally abused by their partner or spouse. (The Commonwealth Fund, "First Comprehensive National Survey of American Women Finds Them at Significant Risk," New York: July 14, 1993)

One in three Americans have witnessed an incident of domestic violence. (Family Violence Prevention Fund, "Men Beating Women: Ending Domestic Violence, A Qualitative & Quantitative Study of Public Attitudes on Violence against Women," New York:1993)

Each year women experience over 572,000 violent victimizations committed by an intimate. Approximately 49,000 such incidents are committed against men. (Bureau of Justice Statistics, Violence Between Intimates: Domestic Violence, November 1994)

Nearly 60 percent of victims suffered injuries at the hands of violent spouses, ex-spouses, and boyfriends. In contrast, victims of attacks by strangers were injured in just under 25 percent of cases. (Bureau of Justice Statistics, Female Victims of Violent Crime, 1991, Carole Wolf Harlow, Ph.D., BJS Statistician)

Thirty percent of American women report that they have been physically abused by their husband or boyfriend at one time or another. (Lieberman Research, Inc. "Domestic Violence Advertising Campaign Tracking Survey: Wave III," November 1995. Prepared for: The Advertising Council and Family Violence Prevention Fund.)

Domestic Violence and Race

There is no relationship between race and the rate of abuse. White and black women show equivalent rates of violence committed by intimates and other relatives. (Bureau of Justice Statistics, Violence Between Intimates: Domestic Violence, November 1994)

Domestic Violence and Age

Women age 20-34 had the highest rates of violent victimization attributable to intimates and of any age group. (Bureau of Justice Statistics, Violence Between Intimates: Domestic Violence, November 1994)

Domestic Violence and Homelessness

According to a 1988 study of 210 women living in shelters, 42 percent reported they were victims of domestic violence. Specifically: 21 percent reported that a violent episode was the primary cause for their homelessness; 15 percent reported that they had become homeless in the past because of battering; 6 percent reported battering within the past two years, but did not report battering as a cause of homelessness. (Safe Horizon Screening and Diversion Study, 1988)

Domestic Violence and Substance Abuse

Battered women are 15 times more likely to be at risk for alcoholism than non-battered women, and are 9 times more likely to be at risk for drug abuse. The increased risk among battered women arises almost entirely after the first reported abusive episode indicating that abuse is the context, not the consequence, of drug use. (Testimony by Evan Stark, Ph.D. and Anne Flitcraft, MD to the Attorney General Task Force on Family Violence, NYC, reporting on the major findings from a five year study at Yale New Haven Hospital, 1984)

Domestic Violence and Suicide

Twenty-six percent of female suicide attempts presented to a hospital are preceded by abuse. Fifty percent of black women who attempt suicide are abused. (The Physicians Assistant's Guide to Health Promotion and Disease Prevention, Emory University School of Medicine, 1986, "Woman Battering, A Prevention Oriented Approach," Anne H. Flitcraft and Evan Stark)

Domestic Violence in the Workplace

A 1995 survey found that 94 percent of corporate security directors rank domestic violence as a high security problem at their companies. (National Safe Workplace Institute (NSWI). Survey of 248 security and safety directors of U.S. businesses, 1995)

According to a survey of 118 battered women, 69.5 percent were employed at the time of the abuse. Of that number, 96 percent stated they experienced problems at work due to their abusive situations. (Domestic Violence: An Occupational Impact Study, Domestic Violence Intervention Services, Inc., Tulsa, OK, Connie Stanley, July 27, 1992)

Domestic Abuse During Pregnancy

· Women abused during pregnancy are at greater risk for medical complications of pregnancy, delivery of lower-birth weight infants, and homicide. (Parker, McFarlane, & Soeken, 1994)

· One in six pregnant women reported physical or sexual abuse during pregnancy. Sixty percent of these women said the abuse was recurrent. (McFarlane, Parker, Soeken, & Bullock, Results from a study of 1,204 women in public prenatal clinics in Houston and Baltimore, 1992)

Domestic Violence Homicides

· A commission on domestic violence appointed by New York State Governor Pataki found that 57 investigated homicides could have been avoided had police and other authorities provided greater protection to these domestic violence victims. (New York State Commission on Domestic Violence Fatalities, October 1997)

Forty-two percent of murdered women are killed by their intimate male partners. (FBI, 1988-91 Uniform Crime Reports)

In 1992, an estimated 1,432 females were killed by intimate partners. Female victims represented 70 percent of the intimate murder victims. (Bureau of Justice Statistics, Violence Between Intimates: Domestic Violence, November 1994)

Emergency Room Visits

An estimated 1.4 million people were treated in hospital emergency departments in 1994. Approximately 17 percent or 243,000 patients were treated for injuries inflicted by someone with whom they had an intimate relationship-a spouse, former spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend or former boyfriend/girlfriend. ("Violence-Related Injuries Treated in Hospital Emergency Departments," Bureau of Justice Statistics, August 1997)

Leaving Increases Risk

Separated or divorced women were 14 times more likely than married women to report having been a victim of violence by a spouse or ex-spouse. Although separated or divorced women comprised 10 percent of all women, they reported 75 percent of the spousal violence. (Female Victims of Violent Crime, 1991, U.S. Dept. of Justice, Bureau of Justice Statistics, Carole Wolf Harlow, Ph.D., BJS Statistician)

In a study of three large homicide samples in Chicago, New South Wales (Australia), and Canada, researchers found that wives are much more likely to be slain by their husbands when separated from them than when co-residing. Wives are particularly at risk in the first two months after leaving. The New South Wales data available for slain wives found that 47 percent were killed within two months and 91 percent within a year of separating. (Violence and Victims, Volume 8, Number 1, Spring 1993, "Spousal Homicide Risk and Estrangement")

Marital Rape

Approximately 1,155,600 adult American women have been victims of one or more forcible rapes by their husbands. (Crime Victims Research and Treatment Center, Medical University of South Carolina. "The National Women's Study," Charleston, SC, 1992)

Spousal rape is often more violent and repetitive than other rape and it is less commonly reported. (H.L. Hampton, New England Journal of Medicine, 4, pp. 234-237. "Care of the Woman who has been Raped," 1995)

The Cycle of Violence

A study following the arrest records of two groups (1,575 total cases) from childhood through young adulthood found being abused or neglected as a child increased the likelihood of arrest as a juvenile by 53 percent and as an adult by 38 percent and for a violent crime by 38 percent. (Cathy Spatz Widom, "The Cycle of Violence." National Institute of Justice, Research in Brief, October 1992)

One-third of women who are physically abused by a husband or boyfriend grew up in a household where this happened to their mother. About one in five were abused themselves as a child or teenager. (Lieberman Research, Inc. "Domestic Violence Advertising Campaign Tracking Survey: Wave III," November 3, 1995. Prepared for: The Advertising Council and Family Violence Prevention Fund)

40 WAYS YOU CAN RESPOND TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE

If you know someone who is being battered:

· Believe her, and keep what she tells you confidential.

· Let her know she is not to blame for the abuse; she is not responsible for it and does not deserve it.

· Take the time to talk with her privately and ask about suspicious bruises or fights that you know about. She needs to tell her story in her own time and at her own pace.

· Help her make safety plans for herself and her children. It could save their lives

· Validate her feelings; she may feel hurt, angry, afraid, ashamed or trapped. She may love the abuser.

· If you suspect that abuse is occurring, call 911. Assault is a crime.

· Make strong statements against violence in your social circles and in support of victims building violence-free, autonomous lives.

· Give her information about local resources; the Portland Women’s Crisis Line phone number is 235-5333; the Portland Police Domestic Violence Reduction Unit number is 823-0961.

· Offer to assist her in keeping safe by letting her stay with you, if possible, or keeping documents, money, a packed suitcase for her, or identifying a code word that she can use to signal the need to call the police on her behalf.

· If appropriate, talk to her children about what they are seeing and feeling. Help them make plans to be safe.

If you know someone who is battering:

If you are violent, stop the violence immediately, and seek assistance.

Interrupt verbal harassment, and if it is safe to do so, acts of violence that you see happening.

Call the police, if it is unsafe for you to intervene. It may save someone’s life.

Let batterers know that domestic violence is a crime and that they could be prosecuted and sent to jail.

If a perpetrator is justifying violence or harassment because of something the victim did, point out that the perpetrator is the only one who is responsible for violent acts. Don’t let perpetrators get away with victim-blaming, minimizing or trivializing their violence.

If you don’t like it when someone makes jokes about women or about battering, let the person telling the joke know it and why.

Talk to perpetrators you know about the violence they are doing, but do not disclose information given to you by a victim, unless you have their permission. Let perpetrators know that violence is not acceptable and that they can choose to stop it.

Support strong law enforcement intervention in cases of domestic violence. Don’t defend the batterer to police, prosecutors or judges. Act as a witness to a crime.

If you are an employer, assist police, sheriff or other law enforcement officers to serve orders of protection, subpoenas, or other documents.

Do not ostracize the victim nor “side” with the perpetrator.

Make strong statements against violence in your social circles. Advocate for full accountability by perpetrators, and for full restitution for victims.

For Starters -- Help support shelters and programs for survivors and their children :

Regular, consistent financial donations.

Food donations.

Donations of equipment, gifts, clothing, furniture, blankets, computers, etc.

Donations of meeting rooms, technical or professional services, etc.

Volunteer to assist shelter programs with answering crisis lines, working with survivors, raising funds, training/mentoring for survivors.

Volunteer to work during renovation, clean-up, mailings.

Write letters to City, County, State and National elected officials encouraging them to support funding for intervention in domestic violence and survivor services.

Write letters to the editor supporting services for survivors.

Projects for individuals, groups or teams:

Adopt-an-agency for a year: Provide donations of all kinds; put on a fund-raising event; bring a group of friends/work associates together to form a work party for an agency.

Assist in providing meals or a celebration for those residing in a shelter or transitional housing, including children’s birthday parties, holiday dinners, summer picnics.

Prepare starter kits for survivors -- ask a shelter for exact contents of kit: Household kits (pots, pans, utensils, kitchen towels, broom, clock, etc.); Personal hygiene kits (soap, shampoo, bath towel, wash cloth, comb, toothbrush and paste); Bedding kits (sheets, pillows, blankets, bedspread); Children’s kits (crayons or art supplies, pajamas, stuffed animal, toothbrush and paste); Employment kits (clock, appointment calendar, hose, good work/ interview clothes); Winter kits (mittens or gloves, umbrella, hat, raincoat or warm coat).

Provide blankets or make quilts for shelter residents.

Share your skills through mentoring, tutoring, presenting workshops on parenting, computer use, employment, literacy/GED readiness or job skills.

Community Projects:

Advocacy, including writing letters, making phone calls to elected officials or funders for additional funding for shelter programs, finances for affordable housing, jobs, financial assistance, access to medical care.

Invite shelter representatives to speak to organizations you belong to.

Attend community forums, workshops or training on domestic violence.

Advocate for school-based prevention programs, such as No Punchin’ Judy or Chance for Change and for assistance to children who live in homes where domestic violence occurs.

Make sure schools and other officials take dating violence seriously.

Advocate for appropriate services for underserved populations, such as those who speak Spanish or other non-English languages, are gang-affiliated or -affected or are disabled.

Work against sexism, racism and homophobia.

WHAT FRIENDS CAN DO

Knowing that someone you care about is being hurt by her partner is frustrating and frightening. It often reminds us of our own past or on-going problems; and it is important for you to remember to take care of yourself. Below are some suggestions about what you can do, as a friend, to help someone who is being battered.

1. Believe your friend. She is probably telling you less than what really happened.

Don't blame her for the abuse. She is not responsible for being abused and does not deserve to be abused. Remember that it is difficult to leave an abusive relationship.

She needs to tell her story in her own time and at her own pace. Listen to her and let her know you care about her and that she is not alone. Take the time to talk with her privately and ask about suspicious bruises or fights that you know about.

Validate her feelings. Abuse is awful, scary, embarrassing and hurtful. Feeling "crazy," afraid and helpless are a very natural reaction to a terrible situation.

Help her make safety plans. Help her find a safe place to go, or a place to store money and important documents. Let her use your phone if she needs to make calls. Agree to call the police when needed. If necessary, designate a code word that she can use to indicate the need for you to call the police. Take care of her children if she asks you to, and you feel you can.

Assault is a crime. If you suspect that abuse is occurring, call 911.

Don't tell anyone else what she has told you about being abused. The abuser may hurt her if he hears rumors that she is telling people. Do not confront the abuser using information she has shared with you, unless she gives you permission.

If it is safe to, make strong statements against violence in your social circles. A battered woman who hears these statements may be encouraged to find help.

Know who to call, and get additional information from these groups. Give her the numbers to your local DV Crisis center, hotline, or shelter.

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