CAROL'S WILD RIDE THROUGH LIFE!
LIFE-NO ONE SAID IT WOULD BE EASY!
October 5, 2007...Autumn is here again! I love this time of year. It has been rather hot this year though. The temps have been in the 90's! In October!! Yuck, if you ask me. I want those crisp sunny days with sweater or jacket weather. October 11...Whew! It is finally chilly like October should be. It's in the 50's and rainy a bit. I don't care! I love this cooler weather. I just hope the rain leaves the area before next week. Wennie & Chavela are coming home for a visit and I want it to be nice. A sunny day in the low 70's or high 60's would be perfect. We are going to the Circleville Pumpkin Show on the 20th. I haven't been there in years. In fact, the last time we went, it was with Mommy. I sure miss her, particularly this time of year. She always loved Autumn so much. I guess I learned to love pumpkins, bittersweet, cornshocks and all the colors of the leaves from her. I didn't talk about how difficult the past year has been. Last November, I went to NYC to visit Chavela while Fabian went to his mother's house in San Diego for Thanksgiving. While at NYC, I fell down some stairs. I thought I had only sprained my ankle but it turned out, once I got home and had xrays done, that I had broken my left foot and my right ankle!! Yikes! So I had to have casts on both feet. The VA gave me a wheelchair and I spent the next few months being unable to drive or hardly get around. Charlie Jr drove us to Cleveland whenever I had a orthopedic appt. Ginny came up on the weekend and we'd go out to eat and then to the grocery store. Fabian tried his darndest to cook and provide for our meals during the week. We tried Meals on Wheels, but oh geez. Their food was nasty! I would rather eat a dozen ham sandwiches day after day than their nasty stuff. I wasn't much help to Fabian. I could sit in the wheelchair and give him directions, but he had to do all the work. He was such a trooper! He cleaned the litter box, cooked and did the dishes, helped me get to and from the bathroom, and every little thing I needed, he would get it. Thank God for him! I finally got the casts off and had to wear these huge heavy black strap-on boots to keep my feet immobile for a few more months. Then finally in the spring I was told I could start putting some weight on my feet. Anyway, life is slowly getting back to normal as far as my driving, getting things done around the house, etc. I was actually able to go upstairs and bring some Halloween and Autumn decorations down, with Fabian's help. We decorated the house because the girls are going to be here next week. Chavela hasn't been home in the fall for years. She loves it when the house is all decorated! So do I. I didn't realize how much I had missed my autumn leaves garlands and pumpkin lights. I hadn't decorated last year because the kids weren't coming home. I didn't think we needed them for just us. Now I know better. We love the look it gives the house and how cozy things feel. Our beloved dog, Eddie, is in rapidly failing health. Dr Gregg has said that Eddie has esophageal paralysis. His throat is closing up on him and it makes him pant heavily constantly. He is also suffering from bad hips and they hurt him all the time. Dr Gregg thinks we will have to put Ed down soon to spare him any further suffering. Fabian & I know we are going to have to make that decision soon. In fact, there's an appt for it to be done on Oct 22, but I don't know if we can, or want, to go through with it yet. Big Ed is still able to get up and go outside to pee, he still likes to eat certain things, although he won't eat dogfood anymore. He has had several awful bouts of diahhrea and did it in the kitchen. But put him to sleep? I just don't know if I'm emotionally ready to do it. Oh God, I love him so much and so does Fabian. We can't imagine not having the boy around anymore. The old house will seem so empty without our boy to talk to you. Big Ed has been our buddy for almost 13 years. In fact, his birthday is Oct 30th. We don't even know if he'll be able to live to see it. July 7, 2006...It's me again. Things have been happening fast lately! We went on our cruise to the Caribbean with Chavela and it was wonderful, just as I knew it would be. We ate some great food, we bought lots of junk, and we swam a lot. The day at the Margaritaville Beach was especially nice! The water was so turquoise and so warm. It was heavenly! We went to Alaska to visit Wennie in June. We spent 2 weeks adventuring all over Alaska and it was so awesome. No wonder they call it the Last Great Frontier. We went to Seward, Fairbanks and Denali. Denali was so fabulous! We saw moose, wolves, grizzly bears, fox, caribou, moose and dall sheep. We loved riding the train, which even had a dining car. I have always wanted to experience that. It was so fun eating while going down the tracks. We even saw moose during our meal! Wennie has a really cute little house. I like how woodsy it is. She has done a lot of work painting etc to fix it up nice. Fabian is leaving for 10 days to see his mother, who lives in San Diego now. She moved there last year when Curly's Dad died. He left the house to them. She says she likes it there, but still misses Arizona a lot. I would be the same way if I ever left Ohio. I know I don't agree politically with very many Ohioans, but I love this state and it's simple beauty. I doubt if I'll ever live anywhere else. We went camping up at Mohican in June. We had a really nice time, especially since that's one of the few state parks that has a swimming pool. We didn't have much of an appetite though so I think all we made was chili and some hotdogs. We're going camping at Mohican again in August and then twice in October. I love camping in the fall, when you can have a nice campfire and enjoy the chill in the air. Here's the big news...healthwise. On July 3, 2006, I had to begin taking insulin shots. My liver enzymes were continuously high so they had to take me off my diabetic pills, which work through the liver. I was really dismayed when 2 months went by and not only did my liver enzymes not come down, but neither did my blood sugar numbers. They started me out on 10 units but after 4 days, it became evident that it wasn't enough. So on July 6, they increased it to 20 units. That was yesterday and so far, my numbers are much better. Thank goodness! I was beginning to get worried. I DO NOT LIKE having to take shots, but it's better than letting my body go to pieces with high blood sugar numbers. November 26, 2005...Well, I'm back. I don't know if anyone else ever reads this, but that's ok. I enjoy it anyway! Fabian & I just celebrated Thanksgiving at Becky & Dan's house over in Delaware. It was very nice. Driving over there wasn't so much fun. We had snow for Thanksgiving! Almost 5" came down and the roads have some very icy patches. Becky is so easy to get along with. She's a very laid-back person. Still, I miss going to Mommy's house and all the celebrating we used to do together there. I will always miss it, no matter how nice any future Thanksgivings are. I was sorry the girls couldn't come home this year. Since they weren't going to be here, it didn't really matter too much to me where we went. I love being with my girls and that's what makes a holiday special to me these days. Still, I was very grateful that Fabian & I are still able to look across the table and see we're both still around! Our health isn't all that great at times, but we're trying. Diabetes is a constant battle and you have to try and stay one step ahead of it. That's not always easy. Food is, of course, the big enemy but is also the great comforter. Nobody knows that better than a diabetic. Chavela is coming home for Christmas! I am so happy about that. Otherwise, I wouldn't even put the decorations up this year. I didn't put any up for Halloween or Thanksgiving. This was the first year that's EVER happened. I just didn't have the energy. We have gotten a lot done this year and I think it has wore me out. We had a $$ settlement from the VA in April so we used the money to fix up the house. First, I had all new windows installed. Then we got a water softener from Lowe's, all new circuit breaker box and lots of new electrical outlets put in, even upstairs. We had new carpet installed in Wennie's old room. I did all the work remodeling the girls bedrooms upstairs. I spackled and painted and wallpapered them! It was a lot of work, but oh, do they look cute. Next week, Lapp Heating is coming to install an upstairs furnace!!! Imagine that! All these years with a frigid upstairs and now it's going to be heated. Wow... We are taking Chavela on a cruise in April. I can't wait. She will just love it. And being with her will be the best part of all. Then in June we are going to go to Alaska to visit Wennie. I can't believe I get to do all this traveling now. I've wanted to see these places all my life and now finally, I'm doing it! I would love to someday go to Egypt, but I'm not about to go to that part of the world until it's safer than it is now. Terrorists have practically become a common word these days. That's such a sad thing...this old world has a lot of wonders to see but all they think about is murder and mayhem. March 6, 2005...Wow, it's been a while since I wrote on here! A lot has happened. We got 2 new kittens who will be 1 year old on April 1. One is female..Calico; the other is JJ..male and all black. Both of them are so adorable. Calico loves to snuggle with me. Wennie was living in Ohio last year and she adopted the mother of them. She was hiding out by our barn and we fed her all winter. Then she gave us the gift of kittens! Wennie and Boo, as the momma was named, now live in Anchorage, Alaska. Boo now lives the plush life...... Jan.2004...Our dear little cat, Tooncie-pie, died this month on Jan 18. I am heartbroken. She was a member of the family for almost 15 years and we loved her dearly. I really miss her at night when she no longer gets in bed with us and cuddles. What a great cat she was. I'll always miss her. We are having a really cold winter. It's supposed to go down to -6 tonight! Brrrr! I usually look forward to winter just before the holidays, but by the end of January, the beauty of winter has turned into the blahs. Come on, Spring! Get here quickly! (Nov. 2003) With so many years now gone, I suppose one should be wondering why I am no farther along in my "recovery". I am now ready to accept that I will never be the same. I will never get over it..I will never enjoy life quite like I did when Mommy was alive. She was the backbone of the family and she kept things going. Now the family hardly ever gets together, let alone just getting along. Fabian has recovered somewhat from his awful car accident on July 18, 2002. He will never return to work because of his brain injury. He does manage to get around the house ok. We are working with the VA Clinic to get compensation for him through them since he blacked out because of his diabetes and it's service-connected. They might connect the two and put all of it under service-connected status. That would really help. Wennie has moved back to Ohio. She isn't divorced yet, but it probably won't be long. Dan has all three kids again and I guess things aren't going too well. Wennie, although I know she's hurting, is probably better off not being in the middle of that still. I know we're enjoying having her around again! In fact, we go to craft shows, we make crafts for a booth she opened in Columbus, and we have dinner together regularly. It's great!! It's Christmas again. While I miss Mommy very, very much, we are trying to focus on Chavela coming home for the holiday. She is living in New York City now. She's been there since early summer 2001. Yes, she was there for 9/11. How horrible that was! I was so terrified that she was going to be hurt or worse. But she kept her wits about her that whole horrible day and the following weeks. She's a very brave young woman. We are so grateful that she's safe and well. When she first moved to NYC, she went to job interviews at the WTC. But she decided she wanted to work at Juilliard so that's where she went. Thank God. What I would like to do with this site now is to gab about whatever! I will tell about what is up with my family, what is up with my way-over-spoiled cat and dog, and in general, just hang my hat here. So, to start off my new page, here's a photo of me! We were chopping down our 1999 Christmas tree that day. It was a huge monster of a tree, but oh how beautiful when we got it done! Below is also before and after pics of our tree! The man playing Paul Bunyan, by the way, is my husband of 32 years, Fabian.
Now it's October and I am having trouble with my back. It spasms whenever I try to do much. I can stand at the sink and do the dishes but I have to take sit-down breaks to ease the spasm in my back. If I do the vacuuming, I have to take breaks too. I am not too good at remembering to do stretching exercises but I am doing good on the treadmill. (We bought a new one in the Spring 2007) For the first time, I did 1 mile yesterday, then again today. It's not much compared to how much we used to walk on the Kokosing Gap Trail, but we're older, not as healthy and I did have that nasty fall to recover from.
Our beloved Aunt Josie died last week. We had a big snowstorm the night before the funeral so we weren't able to make it. That made me very sad. I so wanted to be there for her. We sent some flowers and Ginny said they were beautiful.
(Dec. 2002) Well, I'm back. I don't really want to erase the stuff I have on this site yet. I have this weird feeling that if I erase what I wrote about my mom, that somehow it's accepting that she's gone and I'll never see her again. Oh, I know I can't go down to the farm and share a cup of tea with her. But in my heart, I don't want to ADMIT that that's true......
{1999)I thought it was about time I re-do my page. My mother has been gone now over 2 years. It has been very, very hard to get through the grief process. I guess I'll never completely be "through" it! Once you lose someone who means that much to you, you are changed forever. Your life becomes different..the way you see things is different. I am going through changes even after 2 years. I will always miss her.} That is what I wrote last year. I am much better now, but still missing my dear Mother. I guess that's something you learn about grief..while you do get over the awful early shock of it all, you never leave the yearning for them behind. It stays with you forever.
There are many things I love to do. One of them is crafting! I guess I started crafting when I was little. I used to make villages in the driveway out of twigs, jar lids, or anything I could find that worked. Later, I made dolls for my little sister out of socks. My sister Virginia, and I used to cut out Betsy McCall paperdolls from the magazine and we would make her dozens of outfits with crayons and notebook paper. Here are some pics of some of my dolls and bears I've made. I like to start from scratch and just let the idea form as the project progresses!
MY PETS....Who doesn't love cats and dogs? Well, I guess there are "some" people who don't realize how great they are, but not me. I adore my BIG ED and TOONCIE. They are wonderful! Ed is almost 6 years old and has added so much to our lives since we got him. He came to live with us on Christmas Day, 1994. He was 6 weeks old...a gorgeous fat blonde furball! Oh, I loved him the minute I saw him. Tooncie is our fat, stuck-up kiki. She loves to hog one particular corner of the sofa. If you happen to sit there, be prepared to be stared at until you move if she wants to lay there! She loves naps..especially if she can snooze on top of your blankets or coats, canned kiki-food, and being brushed. In the summer, all she ever wants to be happy is PORCHY-TIME. We have a big screened in porch and she LIVES out there all spring and summer.
And here is my beloved Mother....she had the kindest face you would ever want to see. She loved everybody. She was born Feb.19, 1924 in a log cabin in southern Ohio. Her whole life was spent taking care of others. At her funeral, so many strangers came who had been helped by her in some way. She worked at the Senior Citizens Center and would always stop by and check on anyone who was ill. It wasn't part of her job. She just cared that much. I was the recipient of some of that love and I will miss her til the day I die.
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