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Jonathan Peter (0-4 mo.) (4-6 mo.) (6-8 mo.) 1st Halloween (9-12 mo.) 1st Birthday (12-14 mo.) Family Vacation (5/99) 1.5 - 2.5 yrs.
Portraits
Benjamen David Birth Story Birth Day Photos (0-4 mo.) (4-7 mo.) 1st Haircut Portraits 2nd Birthday 3rd Birthday
Benjamen and Jonathan Photos
Spring 2001
Nicholas Jacob
1st 2002 Snow
Mama's Baby Photo
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Birth Story (Part 2) My vocalizations got really wild. Marsha told my mom afterwards that I sounded like a Lion. I remember thinking b/w contractions that I had never heard any sound like that in nature. I don't know how I made them, but I wish I had had a tape recorder going. They were really powerful sounds and I'm sort of mystified that I'm capable of making noises like that. My throat hurt a little for a couple of days after the birth. After each contraction, I would slump onto the side of the tub and relax completely. Then I started feeling pressure between the contractions. When I first started pushing "a little" I felt that I had stool in my rectum, but didn't give it much thought. I wish now that I had. I had been constipated toward the end of the pregnancy and hadn't been able to have a bowel movement for several days, though I felt the urge. I wish I had mentioned this to one of them, but it just never really occurred to me. I figured that passing the stool would be nothing compared to passing the baby, so I never worried about it or gave it much thought. I was wrong. As the contractions got stronger and my pushing became harder, the stool caused alot of pain, but I assumed that it was Benjamen coming down and causing the pressure. The muscles in my back ached so badly and I screamed out a few times from the pain. Marsha decided it was time to go to the bedroom and I complained and said after the next one...my usual ploy...Marsha agreed and with the next contraction, my water broke. It felt like I had a water balloon inside of me that just popped from the pressure. I knew it immediately and said so. Everyone gathered to help me out of the tub after that contraction...I complained some more and it seemed like everyone was talking and trying to talk me out of the tub...I kept saying, "Listen, Listen...listen, you guys...listen..." and they finally all stopped talking and listened, but I didn't really have anything to say...I just wanted it to be quiet. They all got quiet and still and I stepped out of the tub on my own. I said something like, "Y'all are going to be in big trouble if it hurts more than in the water" Sue said she didn't think it would hurt more. She was wrong, but it wasn't her fault. I got into the bed just as a contraction hit. I was trying to find a comfortable position, but ended up flat on my belly, legs extended, stretching in pain, butt clenched, fighting it every second. The pain was excruciating. But it wasn't Benjamen...it was the bowel movement. I think Marsha checked me to see if Benjamen had come down and that's when she felt the stool. She told me what it was and said I had to push it out to make room for Benjamen to come down. She was trying to get me in a good position by lifting my leg but that really hurt. I was fighting against it because it hurt so much to push, but she kept telling me I had to get my pelvis open for Benjamen. I was fighting the pushing sensation and they could tell. Marsha said that I had to push past the pain and kept trying to get my leg up, but I was fighting her. After that contraction, though, I tried to find a more comfortable position. I leaned up against the wall with my knees wide apart on the bed. I think I leaned on Dan through one contraction, but then asked for the birth ball. I groaned into the ball through one contraction but then ended up pushing it away and was sort of face-down into the mattress with my hiney up in the air. That felt better and I pushed the stool out and immediately felt Benjamen's head descend and started to feel the burning sensation of crowning. It only lasted a second and his head was out. Ahhhhh...what a relief...I'm not religious at all, but for some reason I was yelling out "Thank you, Jesus!" I think I remember a woman on a Baby Story yelling that out. She had a really good waterbirth, so maybe that's why it stuck with me somehow? I also was saying that I felt so much better :) They suctioned him a little and we waited for the next contraction. Between the contraction, though, he started turning or shifting or something and I yelled at Marsha not to push him back in. She wasn't of course, but I was irrational and that's what it felt like. I screamed at her not to push him and to stop it. She said she was checking for cord and I yelled at her not to do that. It wasn't her that I was feeling, though, it was Benjamen turning...On the next contraction, he turned to the right and then changed his mind and turned all the way back around to the left and his whole body was born...It didn't hurt at all and I only felt relief. The burning and the sensations of him coming down and out were completely overwhelmed by the pain that the stool had been causing. I think that during the 2nd stage (pushing), about 75% of the pain could have been eliminated if I hadn't had that bowel movement. Needless to say, if I feel the least bit constipated, next time, I'll be asking for an enema first thing. Anyway....More "Thank you, Jesus"'s and then I was asking for my mother and I yelled out for Jonathan. They weren't in the house, so Dan went looking for them and they were just coming in, I guess. I lifted my leg and rolled over on my side and they handed Benjamen to me. He was still bluish, and they were giving him a little oxygen, but he did really well. I think they said his Apgars were 7 and 9. We tried to nurse a little, but he wasn't interested. Jonathan and my mother came in and Jonathan watched with interest and then walked away...Later he said, "Benjamen came out!" and he says that at least once or twice every day since. The rest is sort of a blur, but Dan took Benjamen at some point and sat on the bed while they checked me. I had 2 skid marks that were hardly noticeable, and a small 1st degree tear at the site of my episiotomy (with Jonathan). Marsha sewed me up and that was a little uncomfy, but it was really nothing (only a few stitches...less than an inch tear) after having just gone through labor... Within an hour or so I was up and taking a shower...didn't need any help or anything. With Jonathan, I couldn't even sit up in bed without feeling dizzy and light-headed on the 2nd day after he was born. The difference in recovery has been amazing. Marsha thought that Benjamen weighed around 8.5-9 lbs...but when she weighed him, he was 10 lbs, 4 oz...we determined that he must be all muscle b/c he just doens't look that big or chubby or anything. I keep saying he's dense ;) Of course, he's 22 inches long, too...so that may make a difference. Jonathan was 8 lbs 9.7 oz and only 20.5 inches. We took him in to the pedi at 2 days old, and he had already recovered his birth weight. He was 10 lbs 4 oz, exactly. Everything else was fine, too. We declined everything except the PKU, and I nursed him through that. When the nurse left I heard another nurse outside say that that was the quietest PKU she had ever heard. He did cry, of course, but the nursing really really helped, I think. Jonathan had a much harder time and I wish that I had thought of nursing him through his. Nursing is going really well, needless to say. My milk came in in just a little over 24 hours. Jonathan helped alot with that, I'm sure. He's happy with the milk and our nursing sessions are much more relaxed (I had alot of nervous/antsy feelings when nursing while pg). He likes to nurse when he sees Benjamen nursing, so we're working out all of the acrobatics of tandem nursing. When Benjamen was a day old, he crawled up on the bed and I pushed B away a little so that J could snuggle up to me. Jonathan didn't like nursing with his back to Benjamen, so he asked, "Put Benjamen away?" We got a kick out of that...I called Dan and asked him to please put Benjamen away so that J and I could nurse :) He's been keeping his distance a little, but is introducing himself to Benjamen in his own time...He has come up to him on several occassions and just touched him very gently...his fingers, toes, nose, even his eyes..very gently. I haven't had to tell him to be gentle at all. He watches Benjamen while we nurse together and talks about the birth sometimes. "Benjamen came out and red came out." I guess he wasn't fully prepared for the blood part...I had talked to him about it, but the reality of it was a little different that he expected, I guess. Hmm...what else? This is probably way too long already, so I guess that's it...We're all happy as clams and just enjoying our newest family member! |