For a long time now many of you have wondered just who I am, what I am about, and where have I come from on my life's journey...well here is a little peek into what I am made of. This little section on why women stay has been asked of me, many times, as I am a survivor of Domestic Violence, these are many of the reasons I had for staying in a battering relationship and I am sure that many others had/have as well. I pray that this will enlighten many of those who have not experienced the terror, fear, and heartbreak of domestic violence.
Why Women Stay
Situational Factors:
Economic dependence.
Fear of greater physical danger to self and children if an attempt to leave is made.
Fear of emotional damage to the children.
Not having other housing to move to, feeling stuck and no where to go.
Lack of job skills, feeling that you cannot support yourself and children.
Social isolation which results in little or no support from family or friends.
Lack of information regarding alternatives.
Fear of involvement in the court process.
Cultural and/or religious constraints.
Fear of retaliation by spouse or significant other.
Emotional Factors:
Fear of loneliness.
Insecurity over potential independence and lack of support.
Guilt about failure of relationship.
Fear that significant other/spouse will not be able to survive alone.
Belief that significant other/spouse will change.
Ambivalence and fearover making formidable life changes.
Wanting the children to have a "Father".
These are some of the reasons that I found to stay in a battering relationship for years. It took a while to break the cycle I was in, and another abusive relationship, however, I am no longer there. I have reached a higher plateau despite the fears, anxiety, and many many tears. I am ME!