Links to other sites on the Web
I always thought that my family and I would live happily ever after. That was one of my first delusional attitudes about life. I also thought that mom would be the last person to develop a dementia. Isn't it always that way? She never smoked or drank or had any interesting vices that I can think of unless you think being a Jewish mother is a vice. So imagine my shock when she developed memory problems and was no longer able to keep track of money or why my father was in the hospital or remember that he had heart surgery. At that time, she also began to ask me what day of the week it was or what month. I really couldn't accept all the changes that were taking place in my mother.
Nothing was wrong with my mother. Of course she would get lost in the hospital looking for my dad's room, it was not her home, her neighborhood, and it was a big place, so what if she gets lost there. At home she took long walks, many times a day and never got lost. However she didn't want to be alone for even five minutes.
At first she was refusing nutrition but then discovered ice cream. Currently her doctor is willing to accept it as a major food group becasue it fits into the dairy category and not because it is chocolate which I still cannot ge her doc to accept as a MAJOR food group. Seriously, mom did have eating problems which I thought was depression. After all, dad's internist did do some tests on her and claimed that there was nothing wrong with her. So I went back into denial, and my sweet illusion of mom's good health.
When my father was finally released from the hospital after almost an entire year as a patient, I fully expected a return of good memory and intellectual interests.
My mother did not see doctors regularly , she never even went to one for the flu shot. Anyway she went to college or rather began college after she was 50yrs old because really she was no longer a full time mother and was interested in life in living it, not wating to die. She was an excellent student and even became a phi beta kappa. At home she enjoyed talking with me about her studies, I was away in college myself so we got to compare notes, she was enjoying occaisional baby sitting of her grandson. She and my father also have a home in one of our Southern states.
With this background, I really thought that mom would never ever need help with anything, anytime, anyplace, anywhere, anyhow.
Surprise! I did not see a noticable change for the better in mom after my father's return, in fact she forgot how to cook and the reptitious questions and need to know the date/season continued, so I called my father's internist again and asked him again about his diagnosis/prognosis? He insisted there was nothing wrong with her. I asked about the repetiions, and he said "So What if She is Little Alzheiemery "? And so Began my experiences with the American Health Care system, and my caretaking journey.
It took almost a year before mom saw another doctor. In the meantime she was struggling to get through her daily life and I was trying to find the best doctor for her to take care of her. In the meantime she was seen by one neurologist, two psychiatrists, and one neuropsychologist before I was told that the diagnosis was a DEFINITE MAYBE alzheimer's disease or maybe a mixture with vascular dementia. Only time would tell they said to me. There is NO direct diagnostic tool yet for Alzheimer's Disease. Finally I did connect with Mt. Sinai's Geriatric Clinic. They are very highly rated in the U.S. News and World Report's anual Hospital issue. As of Summer 1998, they are ranked #2 in the nation for the Geriatric specialty, as they were in 1996 when their clinic was recommended to me.
The best geriatric specialty hospital is in UCLA and I think it would be a little hard on mom to go there every three months that she sees the geriatrician. She says she forgives me.
I digress here to point out links to my other pages, just clique on the underlined words such as this one for the Jewish perspective.index and that should take you right there. This is the one for books mostly from a spirtitual or faith point of view. Since I am just starting this and want to list titles that are not listed frequently, etc, I will include biographies and autobiographies as they relate to caregiving.
Links to other sites on the Web
American Alzheimer Ass'n
Union of American Hebrew Congregations
Jewish Theological Seminary of America
National Family Caregiving Association
United Synogogues of Conservative Judaism
Bay Area Jewish Healing Center
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This site is dedicated to Raizel, my mother who was diagnosed with AD/Vascular Dementia in the Autumn of 1996 and had been confirmed again during the summer of 1998.
© 1998, 2001 Penny Klein, pennyklein@mindspring.com
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