For Queer Mice
by BROWWWSER
Filling Up Your Basket (Shopping Part 1)
he truth is out. You were born to shop.
Admit it. But it's pouring down rain outside, you don't have any gas in your car, you've
got nothing to wear, and who wants to go to a mall with a bunch of screaming kids running
around anyway? And there aren't any malls that have everything from gay pride t-shirts,
queer books and music, household tchotchkeleh, and adult CD-ROMs that are open 24 hours,
365 days a year. Fortunately you can sit in front of the computer in your underwear and do
it all from home! So have your credit card ready as we take a look at some handy queer
on-line shopping catalogues.
We start our shopping cyber-trip at Gay-MART,
not to be confused with the cheaper-than-Target-but-better-than-TJ Maxx stores. At www.gaymart.com you'll find over 700 rainbowish and
pride-filled products. The Family Jewels has a large collection of gay and lesbian rings,
bracelets, necklaces, pendants, and more. The Wear House has queer hats, T-shirts,
jackets, and even some feather boas! Jewelry, candles, flags, magnets, and other gifts
with rainbows, lambdas, gender symbols, triangles, and red ribbons can be found at Pride
Place. Peruse their huge book and music collection, not to mention their adult CD-ROM
interactive games movies, and sex guides! Their Rainbow Sex Shop has lots of items you
won't find at Famous-Barr. Finally accessorize with oils and creams, glassware, pet stuff,
mugs, teddy bears and gargoyles, and more. Print out the order form and mail it off, and
you'll soon be enjoying your new purchases without having to worry about seeing your ex at
the Galleria.
For a literal definition of "shopping basket" you absolutely must visit www.faboo.com, the cyberstore where everything is Faboo! This well-designed hot site has lots to offer: male and
female playtoys; boxer, bikini, and thong swimwear; kitschy items (like a computer voodoo
doll for when your PC acts up); sex tools like cock rings, lube, and more (ask for the
Leather Gates of Hell for Christmas); cherubic and not-so-cherubic statues; leather and
rainbow gear; plus calendars, baubles, and potions. Their male video selection is big and
growing, and their budget video selection is great for cheap thrills. Faboo guarantees
their prices are the lowest on the Web and offers secure on-line order processing with
shopping basket technology. With free shipping on US orders over $25 and fast delivery,
this place is truly faboo!
If there's a queer shopping
supercenter on the net, then it must be GayWeb. They
have over 120 companies they sell products for, from ADVance Damron Vacations to Xandria
at www.gayweb.com. They sell similar products as
Gay-MART and Faboo, but they have many unique items including queer screen savers, health
& fitness products, gay checks, lots of videos (lesbian, massage, wrestling, sexual
instruction, etc.), and even penis enlargement products! Chat with other like-minded
shoppers in their Java and non-Java chat rooms, and sign up for their newsletter to be
informed of sales and other events. Order by mail, fax, or their secure server. And
they're open right now!
We're definitely not in Kansas anymore! Enter a "repression free zone... not
suitable for very young or sexually repressed" at The Pink
Zone at www.pinkzone.com. Skip past the
Body Shop (but Dorothy with a nose ring is a must- see) to the online gift shop for all
sorts of queer gear: the Billy doll, Band of Infinity ring, many rainbow items, novelty
toys, stickers, sex stuff, and hilarious socks and t-shirts. Win a free t-shirt by
entering their caption contest, and order by toll-free phone, fax, mail, or Internet. If
you're ever in Seattle, drop by their store for body piercing, tattoos, and hair salon.
Dorothy will never be the same again after visiting the Pink Zone!
Once you get past the same
annoying self-refreshing ad banner at the Rainbow Mall
(use the Stop button), you'll find quite a bit to do at www.rainbow-mall.com. Besides their shopping
directory, they have a news stand, IGTA travel center, forum, graffiti wall, software
center, ticket booth, and community resource center. Take the mall tour for a random romp
through the mall. Then hop over to the "world's largest gay & lesbian mail order
department store" called Zebra'z for unique
fashions, gifts, jewelry, videos, music, books, posters, and drag items. One of the most
novel items I saw at www.zebraz.com was a $200 set of
angel wings. Certainly something you won't find at Crate & Barrel!
For you horny men out there, your adult shopping and entertainment headquarters is GaySpace. Browse from CD-ROMs, award-winning videos (no, not
Academy Award-winning), the Hotmen all-male photo gallery, and weekly specials at www.gayspace.com. Click on the adult online superstore
link to be whisked away to www.manshop.com, the GameLink GayMall extravaganza for adult merchandise. Have a
favorite porn star? Search for videos and CD-ROMs that he's featured in their large
selection. And finally for horny women, take a walk in Eve's
Garden at www.evesgarden.com for sexual
accessories, toys, books, and videos in a way that "celebrates the joy of sex in a
sex-positive and non-sexist manner." Hey, women have needs, too!
Avoid the traffic and the smarmy salespeople of the malls and do your shopping on-line.
Satisfaction is guaranteed!
