10:20 pm – Saturday 4th October 2003

Dance like there's nobody watching
Love like you've never been hurt
Sing like there's nobody watching
Live like it's heaven on earth.
--Mark Twain(?)

A quiet Saturday night in, one of the first for a while, but I suppose I may have to get used to them. Tiffany has been acting really distant of late, I know she's suffering from depression but it hurts to get snubbed like that none the less. I want to help but there's nothing I can do, I hope I don't lose her friendship, but it's hard when she won't make any kind of effort. *sigh*
Last night we went out drinking with some friends, and we ended up at one of the two nightclubs in town. It is a bit of a dive, but it was an ok night. I drank way too much, the first time for that in a long time. Fortunately there were other people to talk to, but Tiffany ditched us to go drink with a guy she knows as we were leaving to go eat about 2 am. Her judgement isn't the greatest, and I felt somewhat snubbed, but by then I was getting ready to throw up so I had other things on my mind. Her friend Bonnie came out with us, and she is very cool, she's a hard-core geeky girl and she is good to talk to. I got home about 4 am in the morning, and though I tried to call, Tiffany wasn't answering her cell phone.

Today of course I was fairly hungover of course, but I couldn't sleep. I drank lots of water and lay around in bed for much of the morning before I went over to see if Tiffany had made it back safely. She had, but wasn't exactly pleased to see me, I always urge her to drink lots of water after drinking because it gets rid of the hangover, alas this time my advice had fallen on unreceptive ears. If I wasn't feeling a little bitter about getting ditched, I might have been a bit more sympathetic. I left and went to the lab to do some work before I headed out for a cycle. Autumn is here in earnest and the leaves are all turning golden-yellow on the trees. I came home for a nap in the afternoon before going back around 6 pm to check on Tiffany. I don't know if she was pissed at me, or whether she was still sick but I got a very cold reception. I decided I was wasting my time and went and went home. Around 8 pm I dropped over and borrowed “Sleeping Beauty” from Doug and I just finished watching a little while ago. It was a happier ending than the rest of my weekend has had so far.
I talked to Ally on the phone for two hours and she is having a similar amount of trouble with a girl. She likes her and wants to meet up, but this other girl just keeps on making up excuses. Having a limited circle of friends really sucks. I don't have any plans for tomorrow, but I hope I can find something to do to keep me busy. When I'm not busy, I wonder why it's been so hard to meet people and make friends here in Montana. The fact that most people are college age is one barrier, and my work and classes are keeping me really busy.
The classes however are going well, I got 100% on my Economics exam and the Communications class is going really well too. They keep my mind occupied and stimulated, even if they're not the best classes to meet people in. It's also October, so it's Green Card Lottery month now. I haven't sent in my “ticket” yet and even though it's a long shot, it only costs the price of a stamp.
Ok, I'm going to try and finish my last entry about the trip down to Yellowstone. I apologize for not updating more regularly, but there have been things on my mind.

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