I am moving in with a roommate this weekend, and I just hope I haven't made a mistake. All the time I have lived in the US, I've placed a primacy on the convenience and privacy I receive from living alone. Last night did not bode fortuitously, but perhaps it was purely an aberration? Alex and Ecole are both East Coast lesbians who share much more in common with each other than I ever will. One of the common attributes I think is that despite both of them living in the West, they seem to think that the East Coast and especially the North-East US is basically the center of the universe. Then Ecole was asking me about the rugby team and if there were any cute lesbians there, and wouldn't drop the subject even when I obviously didn't want to talk about it. Maybe it's my period (irony) but I'm just feeling particularly vulnerable this weekend. Perhaps I'm seeking catharsis through this writing then?

I'm up so incredibly early because of rugby in fact. We have a series of games that start at 8 am on the other side of town so I'm writing this to kill time before I cycle over. I have the feeling that cycling early in the morning will be greeted with some surprise and incredulity, but that might explain why I am one of the fitter people on the team despite the significant age difference.

The week is over, and so for a day I can rest and relax. Being a new professor is a real pressure cooker, even at a small institution like this one. I still think I can get tenure, but do I even want it if I got it? I don't know if I even want to stay in the US anymore, the place just seems to lurch from one superficial crisis to another while it's foundations of liberty and tolerance rot away...

I want to be true to myself, so that while Alex and Ecole watch romantic dramas (and Days of Our Lives) I can feel honest about the things I enjoy even if that makes me a cripple for conversations. Who IS John Cusak?