God, what a crap of a day. Went down with Susan to see her new house whilst she was waiting for white goods to arrive. It's pretty cool, but I knew I should have been at work. When I got back, I found my new bike had been stolen. I had chained it to the outside of the bike cage when I got home late last night and in the morning it was gone. I was so resigned, I don't know why I didn't get angry. Stopped in briefly at work and then went into town to look for a new one (I was using the old bike) but didn't find anything half as good as it. So after cycling around and dying in the hot sun I got back to the lab and was feeling like crap. Peta called and let me know that she had seen Michelle on Wednesday and that she was back in the hospital. That was not good news, so I wasn't feeling much better. I took off some experiments and put a few more on, but was feeling particularly under whelmed. I went into Civic and got all my scripts filled. That's the last of the Androcur and Progynova, so I'll have to make a booking to go back and chat with Dr S***** again before I go home for the holidays. I was also feeling quite down about being on the Roaccutane for another 6 weeks, but it is something I'll just have to get over. I came back and spent a little bit more time at the lab but finally chucked I in and came home exhausted at about 4:30 pm. I ate and crashed from 5:00 pm to 7:00 pm.
I woke up and had a shower and shave. Then I wrote an email to Peta which was pretty heavy and I wasn't sure whether I should send it. Then Red rang and I spoke to her for quite a while, hopefully we will go see "Blair Witch Project" when it comes out. I did send the email to Peta, and we're doing coffee tomorrow, so I hope it won't be too difficult.
Wednesday was rather ordinary, I spent 2.5 hours having coffee with Susan, because I figured it would be the last time I saw before she moves out on the weekend. I did work in the lab, but the experiments didn't appear to work. I believe the methyl phosphine analogs are much more soluble then the phenyl counterparts. C***** is annoying me somewhat due to his general untidiness and lack of assistance in house-keeping in the lab. Perhaps it is the weather and I'm just on edge because of it?
It was only 23 degrees today and I was suffering pretty badly, lord only knows what's going to happen come January. I've compensated slightly for my general down-ness tonight by indulging in excess sugar and other food. Perhaps if I take Friday off I will start to recover? I actually have 13Carbon NMR time tonight and I know I should go back over but my motivation is really striking the bottom of the barrel.
Goddamit, I'm not scared of being alone it's just not having friends at all which scares me more. Friends I can always drop by and see and that is a fall back position if I really need human contact, but not having anyone at all, even just for meaningless conversation bothers me much more. I don't expect it will happen, but I do get lonely sometimes. I was just thinking, that really in my life my friends are about the only thing I have to love, there isn't anything or anyone else. Oh god, spot the person rolling in their own self pity… it's just that it's been a really sucky last three days or so.

12:00 - Ok, I'm feeling a little better now, I read Fortean Times and had a good laugh at the world. Not sure what I'll do tomorrow, but I'm not planning on doing too much.

1:10 am - Too awake to sleep, got nothing better to do.

1:45 am - Reading old diary entries, Jeeze I need a life…